marbles

Wanganui anytime is a quiet little place that when you first arrive you think is small and quaint. But as the months and years pass you find the one shoe shop and the one sports shop really irrating and the fact that shops still shut at lunchtime on a saturday... are they not going to join the real world and see that some people like to go out of their houses on a weekend.

After over 4 years we are ready to move back to the uk, we need more things to do, more people around who think the same and who enjoy being british (the rugby world cup really made me see them for who they are), but then i think.. is it better in other places? Have we seen the wrong place of the country? would we be better off moving around here a bit? My gut feeling is that its the same all over, Taupo is lovely to visit but i would be bored living there, the south island is too cold... i go on and i don't seem to be able to find a place where i could settle down and call it home for good.

so my family and I are going home.. home thats the point really i guess, after all this time i still regard the uk as home and i feel that after so long i should be settled if it was meant to be. Will I miss it, i'm sure i will. When a friend left last week to return home I was jealous, I wished it was me and my family flying off to see family and friends that we had left behind, to have the cold christmas and the hustle and bustle of everyday life. So we have till January to make our final decision as that is when we are putting our house on the market, are we mad to give up everything we have here? The big house and the nice lifestyle? Or am I right to follow my heart and go back to what I grew up with and what I feel comfortable with? It helps that my husband wants to go back 100% so we can talk about all our decisions. I just hope it is the right decision for our 2 young children who were born here, are we doing right by them?

As a teacher I can tell you that the education system here is awful and when the say the standard is good they are lying. They are about 2 years behind the uk children,and their answer is to take things out of the course to make more people pass... not what i think of as a good way to educate our children.

scottish

I reckon its NZ. They are backwards and dont want to come forwards. IMO they cant seem to see outside the box and that suits them fine.

Hubby is in the trades here and the methods they use have either been banned in the UK or are no longer good practice. Tools he threw out 20 odd years ago he has had to rebuy here Ha Ha.. and no we wont be taking them home with us.

I always say follow your gut and then your heart.

You have citizenship I presume so you can always come back. At the end of the day NZ is wonderful for some and hell for others. Me Im somewhere in between. We have the lifestyle but no life. Even if we could of lasted longer here, financally that is, we wouldnt want to grow old here.

Home is home and always will be.

JAJ

You should work out whether it's the 'small town' atmosphere or NZ in general that's bugging you. Would a move to Auckland or Wellington make a difference?

If you became NZ citizens, then Australia would open up as an option for the future. That said, applicants for NZ citizenship are supposed to plan to remain in NZ.

Your children are New Zealanders as they are NZ born. They can always return later on.

As I pointed out on another thread, if you haven't got NZ citizenship at least make sure you have indefinite returning resident visas.

Another point to be aware of if you leave without citizenship. Should you have other children in the UK, they will not be NZ citizens while their elder siblings will be. This kind of disparity in citizenship rights can be a cause of family discord later on.

If you were NZ citizens, then you'd be able to pass on citizenship rights to overseas born children.

You may well find the UK has changed since you left (or that you've changed in the same period) and it certainly makes sense to keep open your options to return to NZ later on.

Jeremy

marbles

I think thats the answer, we may have the money here but we haven't the life we want. Where abouts are you/were you? My mum followed us out and she is staying, she thinks the place is great, so it really is a preference thing. She's going to stay here with her partner when we go. good for her i think she always new we might not stay, i hope it's everything she wants it to be. Maybe she has met the nice kiwi's or she is happy being alone, i will never know as she doesn't talk about things like that.

[QUOTE=scottish]

scottish

That must be so hard for you having your mum here, but she wants to stay.

We are in the Bay of Plenty and to some degree we have what alot of people want but we cant afford to live here. Proposed changes to policy for my hubbys trade means that we cant afford to sit the exams here. Rules changed after we arrived. Between that and me finding it hard to get any type of work we have used any money we had to survive. Not how I want to live. I never once looked to the future but if you cant keep on going living week to week and just getting by. Christ we didnt even have the money to apply for PR!!! NZ has sucked us dry!!!

We lived as well in Auckland but the traffic and house rental prices were silly money plus we didnt leave the Uk to move to NZ version of London, and thats what It felt like to us.

Hope things get easier for you. Once we had paid for those flights it felt like a huge weight off of our shoulders.

This will be our first and last Christmas down under.

Edited: I think another reason why we have found it hard to work for us in NZ is we feel so dislodged from the rest of the world. Hard one to explain.

Good luck
xx

iaink

Have you visited the UK recently? It may not be exactly how you remember it, and after a while away you take the good things you now have for granted that may not be available in the UK, after all, you must have had reasons for leaving the UK in the first place, right?

Maybe a trip back to visit, rather than a total return home might give you a firmer idea what you want to do, before you commit a huge amount of money to moving countries again.

Cant really comment on whether its all of NZ of course, but I imagine it has to be different in the bigger cites, just as its different from place to place here in Canada.

Good luck, whatever you decide, I hope you find what you are looking for.

Linda Max

We spent the last 7 years in Hamilton NZ, some good years, but the bad were really bad.
Hubbby and I had last weekend in Frankfurt, for less than $50 each, return flights. 70mins. flying, loads of culture, christmas markets, freezing cold, trees white with frost, a really nice weekend.
Thats when it hit home, we have choices here, opportunities, and a feeling of space, that empty roads and beaches in NZ never gave us. Does that make sense, maybe it's a mind thing.
There are certain things that I miss about NZ, but none that make me want to get on a plane and go back.
Education is a big plus, middle daughter now started a nursing course, that neither love nor money would have got her in NZ, and believe me I tried. Youngest is doing her highers, and hubby has had loads of job offers.
4 years is a long time, if it does not feel right now, it probably is a waiting game. getting citizenship would be a good idea though, if you dont already have it, you never know what the future will bring.

marbles

With a family of 4 to pay for flights, accomodation etc,and then kenneling our pets it would be far too expensive, its nearly the same as taking everything home. reading the comments on here make me feel happier that we are doing the right thing going back, lots of people seem to have felt the same and have adjusted back to life in the uk with no real problems. There is also the problem of getting time off work and losing the money from that. It all amounts to very expensive.

Also I need to add we didn't leave the uk because we didn't like it, we lived in Hemel Hempstead for 7 years and thought it was a brilliant place to live, wish we could go back there but can't because it is so expensive. We came out to NZ because I got a job at a school out here, we decided to come for a year initially to see what we thought of it. Unfortunatly we had to sell our house and things to pay for it so we have nothing to go back to. After a few months we knew that we didn't want to go back so soon so we decided to stay indefinatley, or until we made a decision about what to do next. Having our 2 boys made us think about what we wanted for our family as it was no longer just us two and our backpacks. At least we are going back with all our furniture and goods this time so we don't have to start completely from scratch. Just no house..

[QUOTE=iaink]

Velouria

good luck with the house thing. might be best to rent for the time being. i bought a house just outside of welwyn garden city in 1998 - sold it four years later for almost double the amount i paid. and was unable to get back onto the property ladder after that. ok i did pay off some debts from owning the house and was left with a decent amount. but even the two bed end of terrace i rented after that would have cost me over 160,000 to buy. and on my own, that wasnt possible.

Lenmil

Well we are feeling exactlty the same and have come to the same conclusion unfortunately. Only one of us has a job with two kids to feed. There is no part time work here in CHCH so my wife cannot get a job. As for the housing, why o why have they not got insulation. Hot outside cold inside, bloody insane. This may be our only Christmas here too unless we win the lottery, but that won't happen will it. Nice place NZ but you cannot afford to live here. Great for kids true but what happens when they grow up. As for the whinging POMS, why????? don't they listen to what you are saying and learn from it and go forward in the world. Its beautiful i have to admit and i would stay if i was "RICH". But then again would i?

marbles

The strange thing about Wanganui is the houses are really cheap, they are only now starting to go up in price so we were lucky that we could afford to buy a nice house. Because of the job situation, I went out to work and my husband stayed home and looked after our child (we had one then), being a teacher I am on a good salary so we could afford to live on one wage but we didn't have much money spare at the end of each week to do anything exciting.. but then there is nothing to do so it didn't matter that much. Its so far from the rest of the world it costs a mortgage to take your family on holiday.

The houses........awful and cold. I don't think i have ever been as cold in a house before so i am not afraid of the english winters, at least the houses will be warm.

Whinging poms!! that must be the most hated phrase for my husband, ask them what pom stands for and they haven't got a clue, tell them and they just say so what, and whinging! well if you listen to the radio, telly or read the papers then you see that they really are the champions of whinging. If they lose anything then its somebody elses fault not theirs.

The country is beautiful in places but we have been disappointed by some of the rubbish. Our beaches are quite desolate and lots of people seem to think that gives them the right to dump things. When we see pictures of Cornwall and Devon then we see that there are far more nicer places at home than there are here we just never looked at them with good eyes.. typical grass is always greener until you get to the other side and see what you had in the first place.

so are you selling up and going home? I can't believe how many of us there are.

[QUOTE=Lenmil]

marbles

Unless we win the lottery we will be renting, because we will have spent all our money moving back. Never mind I'm glad we did it rather than sat and thought about what it would have been like for 20 years.

Merlot

[QUOTE=marbles]With a family of 4 to pay for flights, accomodation etc,and then kenneling our pets it would be far too expensive, its nearly the same as taking everything home. reading the comments on here make me feel happier that we are doing the right thing going back, lots of people seem to have felt the same and have adjusted back to life in the uk with no real problems. There is also the problem of getting time off work and losing the money from that. It all amounts to very expensive.

Also I need to add we didn't leave the uk because we didn't like it, we lived in Hemel Hempstead for 7 years and thought it was a brilliant place to live, wish we could go back there but can't because it is so expensive. We came out to NZ because I got a job at a school out here, we decided to come for a year initially to see what we thought of it. Unfortunatly we had to sell our house and things to pay for it so we have nothing to go back to. After a few months we knew that we didn't want to go back so soon so we decided to stay indefinatley, or until we made a decision about what to do next. Having our 2 boys made us think about what we wanted for our family as it was no longer just us two and our backpacks. At least we are going back with all our furniture and goods this time so we don't have to start completely from scratch. Just no house..

Marbles

Just do it, we came back to the UK on the bones of our bum, even now after 9 months still skint but happy. We will turn ourselves around at some point money wise.

We rent and most of our home furnishings have been donated by family and friends and guess what everyone that comes into our home comments on how "homely" it feels!

I'd rather be here happy and skint that sitting in an ivory tower in some country I hate talking non-stop about how many investment homes I have, whether I have a beach view or the exchange rate, acting like a 21 century colonialist!

Good luck, Merlot

Lenmil

[QUOTE=marbles]The strange thing about Wanganui is the houses are really cheap, they are only now starting to go up in price so we were lucky that we could afford to buy a nice house. Because of the job situation, I went out to work and my husband stayed home and looked after our child (we had one then), being a teacher I am on a good salary so we could afford to live on one wage but we didn't have much money spare at the end of each week to do anything exciting.. but then there is nothing to do so it didn't matter that much. Its so far from the rest of the world it costs a mortgage to take your family on holiday.

The houses........awful and cold. I don't think i have ever been as cold in a house before so i am not afraid of the english winters, at least the houses will be warm.

Whinging poms!! that must be the most hated phrase for my husband, ask them what pom stands for and they haven't got a clue, tell them and they just say so what, and whinging! well if you listen to the radio, telly or read the papers then you see that they really are the champions of whinging. If they lose anything then its somebody elses fault not theirs.

The country is beautiful in places but we have been disappointed by some of the rubbish. Our beaches are quite desolate and lots of people seem to think that gives them the right to dump things. When we see pictures of Cornwall and Devon then we see that there are far more nicer places at home than there are here we just never looked at them with good eyes.. typical grass is always greener until you get to the other side and see what you had in the first place.

so are you selling up and going home? I can't believe how many of us there are.

We are going to make our final decision after Christmas but it will be most likey we are leaving. We are worried that we may become PONZ ( prisoners of new zealand) as a friend of mine coined the phrase. I feell though that it is a damn shame as it is a beautiful country and most Kiwi's are great. But the last few weeks i have had a few confrontaions by passers by at the whare house and by a biker who swore at me. Mind you he drove off as soon as he realised that i did not give a ****. I used to play in heavy rock bands and hang out with "REAL" bikers, so the leather and beards do not scare me at all. But it amazes me how many slag off the UK but still they love to go there. At least i am honest about my country and its problems, i don't paper over the crevases to hid the truth. Our next door neighbour told us how theses houses would not be allowed to be built in Canada, even though the wife tried to tell him we have been there (i lived there as a kid) as well as Alaska (lovely warm houses even though it was -20 outside). Poms must not travel eh! Anyway, good luck to every one who tries it and does not like it and as well as those who stay. Each to their own. If we leave i will post it on here. Regards.

Velouria

well that is a great attitude to have about it all - and that is what life is all about - trying new things. like you said, at least you have done it and now know what its like. there's nothing like living with 'what ifs'

good luck!