Two Years Today.

Old Jun 29th 2009, 10:50 am
  #1  
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Default Two Years Today.

Have not posted for ages but just realised todays date and it dawned on me that we have been home for 2 years, and how that time has flown!

For those that don't know the story, without wanting to bore you all, we arrived in Perth Jan 2006, after a 2 year slog to get there. After a few weeks we moved south to Bunbury, OH got a job, kids settled into school. By the May we owned our own home and settled in to life by the sea and all seemed right in the world.
By July I was looking at flights home, had a serious bout of homesickness, which funnily enough never lifted. As we had reletives coming out in October and December I pushed things to the back of my mind and set about getting the decorating done before their arrival. Had a fantastic time with my brother and nephew but they went home 3 days before christmas and that did it for me, I just sank lower and lower, I seriously thought I could end up on the funny farm.
By the end of Jan I told my husband I was going home, it was upto him if he was coming with me, I wasn't staying. So that was it, house went up forsale and thankfully it sold in May, we were then able to book flights etc.
Arriving home, what a relief, and I still feel like that, we stayed with my aunt for 7 weeks while we looked for somewhere to live, managed to get kids back into their old school.
We still haven't bought a house, prices are still to high in our area, but we are renting a lovely house and feel really happy here, and it doesn't really matter if we never own our home again, in the great scheme of things it's only the kids inheritance
OH restarted the business we had before we left for OZ and , touch wood, things are going ok, bit slow recently but we are keeping our heads above water and thats the main thing.
The kids settled back into school, hooked up with all their old mates and are happy enough to be back.
For me to be surrounded by my family and old friends means the world to me and was something I thought I would be able to cope with when we moved to Oz, how wrong was I. To be back in familiar surroundings has made me feel like me again.
I have learnt alot about myself in the last few years, the main thing being that I can't run away and certainly not from myself, which with hindsight, I think I was probably trying to do.
I have no regrets about the whole experience as it has made me who I am today.
THANKS FOR READING,
cheers Deb xx
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Old Jun 29th 2009, 12:37 pm
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

what a great post,I will be home at the end of the year totally understand the me being me again,I know our move is so right as Im not in contact with any of my family so the pull isnt for them,just home is home and I will always be content with that.z
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Old Jun 29th 2009, 3:45 pm
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

Originally Posted by Treacle Tart
Have not posted for ages but just realised todays date and it dawned on me that we have been home for 2 years, and how that time has flown!

For those that don't know the story, without wanting to bore you all, we arrived in Perth Jan 2006, after a 2 year slog to get there. After a few weeks we moved south to Bunbury, OH got a job, kids settled into school. By the May we owned our own home and settled in to life by the sea and all seemed right in the world.
By July I was looking at flights home, had a serious bout of homesickness, which funnily enough never lifted. As we had reletives coming out in October and December I pushed things to the back of my mind and set about getting the decorating done before their arrival. Had a fantastic time with my brother and nephew but they went home 3 days before christmas and that did it for me, I just sank lower and lower, I seriously thought I could end up on the funny farm.
By the end of Jan I told my husband I was going home, it was upto him if he was coming with me, I wasn't staying. So that was it, house went up forsale and thankfully it sold in May, we were then able to book flights etc.
Arriving home, what a relief, and I still feel like that, we stayed with my aunt for 7 weeks while we looked for somewhere to live, managed to get kids back into their old school.
We still haven't bought a house, prices are still to high in our area, but we are renting a lovely house and feel really happy here, and it doesn't really matter if we never own our home again, in the great scheme of things it's only the kids inheritance
OH restarted the business we had before we left for OZ and , touch wood, things are going ok, bit slow recently but we are keeping our heads above water and thats the main thing.
The kids settled back into school, hooked up with all their old mates and are happy enough to be back.
For me to be surrounded by my family and old friends means the world to me and was something I thought I would be able to cope with when we moved to Oz, how wrong was I. To be back in familiar surroundings has made me feel like me again.
I have learnt alot about myself in the last few years, the main thing being that I can't run away and certainly not from myself, which with hindsight, I think I was probably trying to do.
I have no regrets about the whole experience as it has made me who I am today.
THANKS FOR READING,
cheers Deb xx
Your story is exactly same as mine, arrived in Perth 2006, stayed 2 half years, back home again in UK...(i also said to hubby i'm off with or without him).
I think exactly same as you about house, we rent at the mo, family is so important to have around.............oh and Perth is still dead boring hehehehehe.
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Old Jun 29th 2009, 3:58 pm
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

Just like to wish all you returnee's the best of luck,and to welcome you back home!
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Old Jun 29th 2009, 4:16 pm
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

your post echos me really. Been back a year now and starting to feel settled once more. Boys are happy in school, I'm getting a life back again and things are looking good for us all.
I love Australia I really do, but being back has made me look at things differently too and I'm not finding it as bad as I once thought it was.
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Old Jun 30th 2009, 6:58 am
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

Did you really give your O/H's that ultimatum, would you have stuck to it?
Im not criticizing your actions, Im generally curious since Im in a situation where I would go home tomorrow if not for my wife who loves it here.

In my situation I believe theres a sacrifice one of us has to make and right here and now it is my sacrifice and Im happy with that for that very reason, going back home is not something I would break my marriage for.
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Old Jun 30th 2009, 8:36 am
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

This post really strikes a chord with me. I only stayed in Vancouver for six months and for various reasons came back to the UK for an extended break/chance to evaluate and long story short, I am still here - I have found a job, I have put my daughter into nursery and I told my hubbie who was still in BC that I was not coming back. He is flying back on Saturday but I know that he wanted to stay...and finally, after much soul searching and having learned so much about myself over the last year - I know that I would not have gone back for him....so although the whole experience was not what I expected, it has taught me so much about myself and what I am now capable of even when you think that everything is against you...
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Old Jun 30th 2009, 9:48 am
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

I dont think I would have ever sacrificed my marriage for a country although I have come darned close on occasion. I wish I had your courage to call his bluff - but he can be a bit thick and would probably stay where he is.

Glad things have turned out well for you all.
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Old Jun 30th 2009, 10:21 am
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

Thank you. I didn't think I would have the courage either and if someone had asked me three months ago whether I would go back to be with him or stay here without him, I wouldn't have hesitated in going back to 'save our marriage' but once I realised what I had become, and just how much this whole experience had taken out of me and from me, I had to make decisions and not just for me but on behalf of my daughter too..I know I have made the right choice for me and my daughter, the question that remains to be seen is whether it will prove to be the right choice for 'us' as a family and I guess only time will tell.

Everyone's story is different and it really does take one emigrant to know another's trauma, sadness and ultimately the sacrifices that have to be made whether to stay in the country of emigration or to return to the safety of the UK...if I hadn't been in this situation, I could never be as tolerant or understanding or as accepting of other people's situations...hopefully this whole thing has taught me to be a better person...poorer in monetary terms for sure, but richer in life experience...although I have to say, once you emigrate, you are never ever 100% sure that any of the choices you make are the right ones - I still miss Vancouver but whether that is for the opportunity lost or whether because we worked towards it for so long, I don't know...but I had to make my mind up one way or the other as I couldn't live in limbo land forever.....
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Old Jun 30th 2009, 10:45 am
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

Originally Posted by Nu-Shooz
Your story is exactly same as mine, arrived in Perth 2006, stayed 2 half years, back home again in UK...(i also said to hubby i'm off with or without him).
I think exactly same as you about house, we rent at the mo, family is so important to have around.............oh and Perth is still dead boring hehehehehe.
Did you used to post under a different username? If you are who I think you are I can remember having many a moan to you! Glad you are home and happy
Originally Posted by DebraH
your post echos me really. Been back a year now and starting to feel settled once more. Boys are happy in school, I'm getting a life back again and things are looking good for us all.
I love Australia I really do, but being back has made me look at things differently too and I'm not finding it as bad as I once thought it was.
I remember your story Deb, so glad you are feeling settled
[QUOTE=Graham and Maria;7711124]Did you really give your O/H's that ultimatum, would you have stuck to it?
Im not criticizing your actions, Im generally curious since Im in a situation where I would go home tomorrow if not for my wife who loves it here.


I did give him that ultimatum, fortunately for me he didn't "LOVE" oz and could see how things were affecting me, which in turn were affecting him and the children. Don't get me wrong it caused alot of friction and there was a point when I really thought I would be making that journey without him, thankfully he realised he couldn't live without me or the kids so once that decision was made things were alot better and have been great ever since.


Originally Posted by pammiej
Thank you. I didn't think I would have the courage either and if someone had asked me three months ago whether I would go back to be with him or stay here without him, I wouldn't have hesitated in going back to 'save our marriage' but once I realised what I had become, and just how much this whole experience had taken out of me and from me, I had to make decisions and not just for me but on behalf of my daughter too..I know I have made the right choice for me and my daughter, the question that remains to be seen is whether it will prove to be the right choice for 'us' as a family and I guess only time will tell.

Everyone's story is different and it really does take one emigrant to know another's trauma, sadness and ultimately the sacrifices that have to be made whether to stay in the country of emigration or to return to the safety of the UK...if I hadn't been in this situation, I could never be as tolerant or understanding or as accepting of other people's situations...hopefully this whole thing has taught me to be a better person...poorer in monetary terms for sure, but richer in life experience...although I have to say, once you emigrate, you are never ever 100% sure that any of the choices you make are the right ones - I still miss Vancouver but whether that is for the opportunity lost or whether because we worked towards it for so long, I don't know...but I had to make my mind up one way or the other as I couldn't live in limbo land forever.....
I couldn't have put it better myself, I think you echo lots of peoples thoughts and feelings. I'm glad you are where you want to be
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Old Jun 30th 2009, 2:30 pm
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

Hey Treacle!

I wrote a massive post then read it and realised that it was just a load of.... rambling about nothing in particular!

So I'll just say that I'm so glad that you and your family are happy and still together back in the UK!

Oh, and sometimes men really do need things spelled out for them to understand just have things are affecting you! (I must have wrote 300 words about that and none if made sense so now you get the heavily edited version, which is must easier to digest!!!

Ali x
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Old Jul 1st 2009, 8:06 am
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Default Re: Two Years Today.

Originally Posted by Treacle Tart
I remember your story Deb, so glad you are feeling settled
It has taken me a while, but yes we are settled now. And we are heading back to Australia in 3 weeks for a long holiday to see friends. Glad we are going but there is also a touch of dread too - mainly I'm dreading at seeing what we left behind (as in the good memories rather than the sad ones)

thank you for remembering us
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