Tough Situation..
 

Okay, so I am new here, my..friends need some help.

Real help, not being called stupid or whingey/whiney as they were on another forum for expats. They ARE doing the best they can, and are in fact deeply depressed over this so any of the above kinds of talk serves no purpose..

Here is the deal: Boy comes to visit girl, leaves three months later.
Comes back a couple of months later, decides to stay, and they marry.
The timeline is - First visit, Nov. 00, Second March 01, Marriage in June 01.

They have very little funds, have had a runaround from the Gov. as to which papers they need, and are just starting all over with the paperwork so they can file everything all in order this time and get it over with. Girl has no job currently, but needs to be her husbands sponsor of course so is looking for one. It's stressing her out terribly in fact, because she wants to help him.

Has ANYONE had so much trouble with getting in (the guy in question has no 'record' or anything that would make him suspicious or it hard for him to get in. Spotless young 18 year old when they married, fresh from England, no problems.)?! Seven years is a long time to have to wait to work, to get through your forms. People keep steering them in the wrong direction, local immigration people and over the phone as well. What kind of hints/tips/ideas might anyone here have for someone in this situation? And please, be gentle. Real yet kind advice is being asked for. This isn't fun & it isn't funny and..my friends are truly trying to get it all sorted out. They just need a little (lot of) help.

Thank you in advance :o

Re: Tough Situation..
 

Depending on where your "friends" live, they can see if there is a Catholic Charities with an immigration clinic available. They will assist them with the forms. Every large city has immigration agencies set up to work pro bono. Some by nationality, i.e. Aisling Center for the Irish who will assist anyone, NYC has an immigration agency which is pro bono.

If she is not working and he is not working, how have they been living? Will they be able to find a financial co-sponsor?

The forms they will need are clearly listed on the USCIS website.

I-130 completed by the USC
Appropriate G-325A's

I-485 Adjustment of status
I-765 - employment authorization document
G-325A's are required
I-693 Medical
I-864 - Affidavit of Support

Costs with medical and fees for applications are over $1,300+

He should not inconclude form I-131 for advance parole as he is not eligible for it although the fee for the I-1485 does include a fee for the form. Sorry about that.

Re: Tough Situation..
 

Your friends must be getting income from somewhere to live on. I suggest that once they have their paperwork filled out, the try to scrape up $200 or so to have an immigration lawyer look them over for accuracy before they submit them.

If she is stressed about not being financially able to sponsor him, she should try to find a joint sponsor. Anyone who is over the age of 18, is a USC or US PR, and lives in the USA, can be a joint sponsor. Her friends, family, anyone.

Rene

Re: Tough Situation..
 

7 years?! Are you serious???! I'm in that situation right now, except my hubby has a job (just about). If it takes 7 years I think I would go back home and find a way to get him over there.

Re: Tough Situation..
 

It doesn't take 7 years normally. It seems this couple just kept waiting and then running into problems with their paperwork. It normally does not take 7 years to adjust status.

If he goes home now, he will face a ban from returning to the USA for 10 years, so it will take him a LOT longer to return than if he continues trying to adjust status here in the USA.

Rene

Re: Tough Situation..
 

Never mind, I just realized you meant you'd return home and have him immigrate to your country instead.

That would make sense, I agree!

Rene

Re: Tough Situation..
 

Yeah, it's just 7 years seems an awful long time. I was thinking that if I was in that situation I would go back to the UK and get him over there, at least then we would both be working and have enough money to throw at the situation.
However, I wish them luck, it can't be nice at all being stuck like that.

Re: Tough Situation..
 

Your friends need to come here and post themselves. Part of their problem is their lack of information and filtering it through yet another person isn't going to help.

The income issue sounds like it will be a barrier. Does your original post mean that Boy is working illegally to support the family and USC Girl is not working at all?


Whether they come to the forum to research or find an immigrants' assistance place like CC to help, they will be better served by the discussion if they have all their relevant dates written down (when stuff happened), what forms they did file etc.
It would be useful to know how they feel they've been steered wrong. What bad advice do they think they got?

Re: Tough Situation..
 

My "friends" are really ME, and my husband.

I wasn't well recieved when I tried another board awhile ago, so I'm very wary of being bashed..seems if you don't make it through as quickly as other people and you run into snags, people call you stupid and think you are having some sort of pity party by asking for help..:unsure:

I'm American and my husband is British. He has been here the whole time, and would really rather not go back though at times feels desperate enough for us all just to go there and be done with it.

I NEED to get a job, I am well aware of that (having a severe LD in maths doesn't exactly help me feel less nervous about it, though. But I'm TRYING).

I am really grateful for the help, I truly am. I have ordered the forms Rete mentioned, and will recieve them in a few days (I have copies of some, but just making sure I have all of them has given me some peace for the moment.)

One way we have been wronged is by getting mail which told us we were a very few steps away from being through, while we were in contact with USCIS. Suddenly we get a mail stating that we had not been in contact for a year and we got sent back to the start..it wasn't even true, but once they restart your case, what else can you do?! Get a lawyer, maybe - but we can't afford to..

To be honest, my FIL helps us out every month, and we also have a small amount of food stamps. We are very grateful to him for the help but hate having to do it.

We live with my family which is not a good situation, I'm putting that verrrry lightly. I don't drive, and my husband was learning to when he came over here and will hopefully be able to take lessons this year. Our goal is to be done with paperwork, making money on our own and on our way into our own place by early-mid 2009.

I will put it this way..when we contacted our local head of immigration after we were married, he asked 'What's a Visa Waiver?'..um, yeah, so your guess is as good as mine as to how he got the job that he has in the first place! And over the phone help was hardly different (INS/USCIS help, mind you.) and the last time I called I got more info than I ever had in all previous phone calls. The guy was actually apologizing like crazy when I told him what I hadn't been told that he was now telling me, and for the wrong information I had recieved before. I told him it wasn't his fault, he was actually setting things much more straight than they had been before! So I'm truly not making it up that we've been sent down wrong paths before. I once talked with a doctor in the hospital who had a friend who took 6 years to get through even though there should have been no problems, so it seems we're not the only ones to go through this. I just want to know how to 'fix' it.

And yes, money is a huge..and I do mean HUGE factor for us. Most months it's a choice between filing or eating.

For all gentle replies, I thank you. When you are *this* depressed- and I mean truly, seriously depressed, you have no idea..my husband and I both are & in fact had a good cry about it together this morning- about things, you need a bit of kindness :wub: ..The thing is, my husband and I have never once had a fight. We are 25, and met on my 16th birthday, and have honestly never had a fight, not even during all of this (we are like glue!). Our little guy is 5 and has autism & is nonverbal, and our little girl is 3. We are pleased with each other and our children, just not with where we are living, and our money situation. Getting the paperwork done and him cleared would solve so much, and he is desperate to feel like he is DOING something. We would feel so happy if we could be on our own finally!

I guess I was sort of hoping that someone here would have been through something similar and having been in my shoes, would know how to get out based on that..on the flip side, I'm glad it does not seem to happen all that often, and I welcome help from anyone, I'm happy to recieve responses as they're all helpful, so..:cool:

Re: Tough Situation..
 

You can get the forms online right now at www.uscis.gov, Immigration Forms. No need to wait for them in the mail.

Fill everything out, make sure you have the correct fees (double check on www.uscis.gov), and send in your package. If everything is filled out correctly, and you've paid the correct fees, there shouldn't be any snags along the way.

Don't call the 800 help line anymore. They are known for giving tons of misinformation. The phones are manned by contract workers who know nothing about immigration or the laws.

Use your father as a joint sponsor on the I-864.

Good luck to you,
Rene

Re: Tough Situation..
 

I know it is depressing, I haven't been in that situation as long as you have, but Ive been in that situation for 5 months and for us, it is taking its toll big time. However, if I was in that situation for that long, I would look at it as what was a priority? Where we live, or how long it takes? In my mind, I know that I would have to go back to the UK and get him to move to me, then we could both work, both eat, both contribute towards filing, and then once we were together properly and had a GC in the UK for the USC, then we could work towards moving back to the US one day, but the stress would be off.
I know it is hard for you, it sounds horrible, but sometimes the most ideal situation isn't the one that works.

Re: Tough Situation..
 

I ordered the forms through mail because I don't have a printer, wish we did though ;p and my parents divorced before I was born and I never met my father so I can't ask him for help, it's my father-in-law who has been helping & he is back in the UK so he can't really sponsor/co-sponsor or anything like that. I haven't called the helpline in ages. Since he has already been here so long surely sorting it out, filing everything once and for all, and getting it done with hopefully in under a year is pref. to him (and us) going back and then more years of waiting and then more paperwork for us to be able reenter the US again..??

Re: Tough Situation..
 

How about your mom? Can she help? You will definitely need a joint sponsor, unless you can find a job which pays at least $26,500 pretty soon. This figure is likely to go up in April, by the time you want to file everything, so keep that in mind also.

I realize now you wrote, we live with my family. Have them be your joint sponsor.

Best Wishes,
Rene

Re: Tough Situation..
 

Actually, it's just my Grandmother/Mother. My mother is out of work, my grandmother lives of SS, and both are really badly in debt. So no help there.

..Are friends allowed to sponsor/co-sponsor??

Re: Tough Situation..
 

If you go back and read my first response to you, I mentioned that a joint sponsor can be anyone over the age of 18, a USC or US PR, living in the USA. Friends, family, anyone can be a joint sponsor.

Also, your grandmother can use her SS income if it's enough for her household plus the immigrant, and her debts do not come into play. They only care how much she earns, not how much she's in debt.

Rene