Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Sep 26th 2008, 2:04 pm
#16
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Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Stop moaning and just go home.
I think you are lucky enough. Mind you I don't have proper British accents (so I am not popular as you), and don't speak perfect English, either. plus bad health.
sit down and think about what you have got (something good about yourself).
I think you are lucky enough. Mind you I don't have proper British accents (so I am not popular as you), and don't speak perfect English, either. plus bad health.
sit down and think about what you have got (something good about yourself).
Depending on his age...how can he? Please try to be a little more understanding...
Sep 26th 2008, 2:29 pm
#17
Thread Starter
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 25
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
If I could go home, I would. But I can't. My model railway is suffering here from the lack of use and also from having two dining chairs sitting on top of it! (It was set up around the dinner table, but when my GNER 225 derailed twice due to a bent rail, I decided to pack it up. I have a mission in England.
My parents have read the posts on here twice, and are still unmoved. They won't budge, they love it here! We will only return to England if the UK economy goes up and house prices come down, and the opposite happens here.
I feel as though I'm in a dark mist, one which even the brightest of lights cannot see through. I wake up every morning and I say to myself: "What the f*** am I doing here?!"
My parents have read the posts on here twice, and are still unmoved. They won't budge, they love it here! We will only return to England if the UK economy goes up and house prices come down, and the opposite happens here.
I feel as though I'm in a dark mist, one which even the brightest of lights cannot see through. I wake up every morning and I say to myself: "What the f*** am I doing here?!"
Sep 26th 2008, 2:56 pm
#18
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Joined: Jun 2007
Location: South Island NZ
Posts: 527
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
If I could go home, I would. But I can't. My model railway is suffering here from the lack of use and also from having two dining chairs sitting on top of it! (It was set up around the dinner table, but when my GNER 225 derailed twice due to a bent rail, I decided to pack it up. I have a mission in England.
My parents have read the posts on here twice, and are still unmoved. They won't budge, they love it here! We will only return to England if the UK economy goes up and house prices come down, and the opposite happens here.
I feel as though I'm in a dark mist, one which even the brightest of lights cannot see through. I wake up every morning and I say to myself: "What the f*** am I doing here?!"
My parents have read the posts on here twice, and are still unmoved. They won't budge, they love it here! We will only return to England if the UK economy goes up and house prices come down, and the opposite happens here.
I feel as though I'm in a dark mist, one which even the brightest of lights cannot see through. I wake up every morning and I say to myself: "What the f*** am I doing here?!"
Do you belong to any train clubs on the net? Like forums to join for things that interest you it could maybe make your days and nights seem a bit brighter by posting with like minded people.
One word of caution though be vey careful on any forums (the internet can be as bad for boys as well as girls) and dont give out any personal information to anyone, there can be some nutcases lurking around looking for people that are feeling down and pretending to be someone that they aren't you need to of course get the OK from your parents regarding signing up for any forums.
It is very difficult if your parents have read your posts and you feel they were unmoved by them but dont despair they wont have brushed it off they may be thinking about what you wrote in the back of their minds and may be thinking of ways in which they can make life better for you. Most important though is to keep all lines of communication open with them and let them know how you are feeling and as someone said if you cant tell them face to face write it down and get them to read it.
All the best and come on here anytime you like there is always someone that will help....
Cheers
Cally
Sep 26th 2008, 3:04 pm
#19
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Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 912
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Well maybe it's not much help, but I do believe UK house prices ARE going down right now and are likely to for probably the next year or two at least.
Are house prices in Canada not going up? I don't know but I would imagine they are! Certainly I would also imagine the Canadian economy is probably more affected by the USA economy than the UK economy is, and that means if anything the UK economy is probably going to be in slightly better shape than the Canadian one over the next few years.
I'm no expert at all on the Canadian economy but that's my understanding of it.
So it sort of sounds to me like things are heading in the direction that you say would possibly persuade your parents to move back???
As for the feeling of waking up in a 'mist' I can certainly understand that because I feel much the same most of the time.
In the shorter term, to try to get through this without being totally miserable, could you possibly get involved in some kind of hobby / club / sport. I know you said your main hobby can't really be done at the moment (I assume due to lack of space in your house?) but maybe you could try joining some type of organisation that does something else you're interested in (maybe Scouts or a sports group, or you might even find a group that shares your interest in trains???), as a way of taking your mind off your troubles a little bit, and maybe even making one or two new friends.
Please don't think I'm trying to say that that would solve all your problems, or that any new friends would replace your real friends in England. They most probably wouldn't and shouldn't, but at least you might be happier in the meantime while you are trying to find a solution to your situation.
Finding that solution could maybe take a little while so there's no point being miserable during that time if you can avoid it.
Just a suggestion, don't know if it will help or not.
Are house prices in Canada not going up? I don't know but I would imagine they are! Certainly I would also imagine the Canadian economy is probably more affected by the USA economy than the UK economy is, and that means if anything the UK economy is probably going to be in slightly better shape than the Canadian one over the next few years.
I'm no expert at all on the Canadian economy but that's my understanding of it.
So it sort of sounds to me like things are heading in the direction that you say would possibly persuade your parents to move back???
As for the feeling of waking up in a 'mist' I can certainly understand that because I feel much the same most of the time.
In the shorter term, to try to get through this without being totally miserable, could you possibly get involved in some kind of hobby / club / sport. I know you said your main hobby can't really be done at the moment (I assume due to lack of space in your house?) but maybe you could try joining some type of organisation that does something else you're interested in (maybe Scouts or a sports group, or you might even find a group that shares your interest in trains???), as a way of taking your mind off your troubles a little bit, and maybe even making one or two new friends.
Please don't think I'm trying to say that that would solve all your problems, or that any new friends would replace your real friends in England. They most probably wouldn't and shouldn't, but at least you might be happier in the meantime while you are trying to find a solution to your situation.
Finding that solution could maybe take a little while so there's no point being miserable during that time if you can avoid it.
Just a suggestion, don't know if it will help or not.
Sep 26th 2008, 3:12 pm
#20
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Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 88,105
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Hertford...in the short term try to look at it as a once in a lifetime experience. You have the opportunity many in the UK would give their right arm for. Take advantage of the situation you are in and turn in around to better yourself...whether that is eventually in the UK, Canada or somewhere else.
Sep 27th 2008, 3:01 am
#21
Thread Starter
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 25
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
I know. But if I tell my parents the same thing over and over again, they'll just give me a lecture on how lucky I am and how many people would love to be here. I know that! But I don't feel lucky at all. It has been three weeks now since I left England. It really only feels as though it were last week, and at the same time it feels as if it were six months ago.
One thing I really miss is waking up in the morning with a foggy throat and having some good ol' blackcurrant juice to wash it out with. Here I don't have that. I had a foggy throat this morning, and I couldn't help thinking "Where's the blackcurrant juice when you need it?"
Also, England in terms of rail-enthusiast privileges is going down the chute, and all I can do here is sit and watch it happen. I should be there, fighting for what is right, right now! And yet, all I can do now is sit here and type away the minutes. I just can't help it. I could hold a small party I suppose, but the only party I'll be smiling at is the one that sees this house on the market for a vastly inordinate sum. Hopefully I can get a job here soon which will raise enough money for a nice little visit to England in July 2009.
One thing I really miss is waking up in the morning with a foggy throat and having some good ol' blackcurrant juice to wash it out with. Here I don't have that. I had a foggy throat this morning, and I couldn't help thinking "Where's the blackcurrant juice when you need it?"
Also, England in terms of rail-enthusiast privileges is going down the chute, and all I can do here is sit and watch it happen. I should be there, fighting for what is right, right now! And yet, all I can do now is sit here and type away the minutes. I just can't help it. I could hold a small party I suppose, but the only party I'll be smiling at is the one that sees this house on the market for a vastly inordinate sum. Hopefully I can get a job here soon which will raise enough money for a nice little visit to England in July 2009.
Sep 27th 2008, 5:08 am
#22
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Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Southern Ontario(house is SOLD on our way back to UK/aug 09)
Posts: 426
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
I know. But if I tell my parents the same thing over and over again, they'll just give me a lecture on how lucky I am and how many people would love to be here. I know that! But I don't feel lucky at all. It has been three weeks now since I left England. It really only feels as though it were last week, and at the same time it feels as if it were six months ago.
One thing I really miss is waking up in the morning with a foggy throat and having some good ol' blackcurrant juice to wash it out with. Here I don't have that. I had a foggy throat this morning, and I couldn't help thinking "Where's the blackcurrant juice when you need it?"
Also, England in terms of rail-enthusiast privileges is going down the chute, and all I can do here is sit and watch it happen. I should be there, fighting for what is right, right now! And yet, all I can do now is sit here and type away the minutes. I just can't help it. I could hold a small party I suppose, but the only party I'll be smiling at is the one that sees this house on the market for a vastly inordinate sum. Hopefully I can get a job here soon which will raise enough money for a nice little visit to England in July 2009.
One thing I really miss is waking up in the morning with a foggy throat and having some good ol' blackcurrant juice to wash it out with. Here I don't have that. I had a foggy throat this morning, and I couldn't help thinking "Where's the blackcurrant juice when you need it?"
Also, England in terms of rail-enthusiast privileges is going down the chute, and all I can do here is sit and watch it happen. I should be there, fighting for what is right, right now! And yet, all I can do now is sit here and type away the minutes. I just can't help it. I could hold a small party I suppose, but the only party I'll be smiling at is the one that sees this house on the market for a vastly inordinate sum. Hopefully I can get a job here soon which will raise enough money for a nice little visit to England in July 2009.
Sep 29th 2008, 6:36 am
#23
Thread Starter
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 25
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Bingo! I've talked to Dad about this, and he says: "If I can find a way to support all of us, find a good location and a good house, we may move back. Of course, that means all three of us (Me, Mum and Dad) will have to find good-paying jobs. Does anybody know of anything around Ware which has good pay and good hours? I have subscribed to a job at the Railways, and if I'm offered a job, then I can apply and help to support us. This is a major step, but I'm not sure if it's actually genuine. If it is though, then it looks like a good time approaching for me.
Hertford
Hertford
Sep 29th 2008, 6:38 am
#24
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 15,019
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Bingo! I've talked to Dad about this, and he says: "If I can find a way to support all of us, find a good location and a good house, we may move back. Of course, that means all three of us (Me, Mum and Dad) will have to find good-paying jobs. Does anybody know of anything around Ware which has good pay and good hours? I have subscribed to a job at the Railways, and if I'm offered a job, then I can apply and help to support us. This is a major step, but I'm not sure if it's actually genuine. If it is though, then it looks like a good time approaching for me.
Hertford
Hertford
Sep 29th 2008, 7:11 am
#25
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Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
I know it's not an easy situation to be in. At first in 2004, I was excited. I was going to explore a whole new type of territory, but when I got here, I did feel slightly homesick, only for a day or two though. When I went back to England in 2006, I felt extremely happy, but at the end of the six week holiday I was dreading the flight back home, I entered a major nervous breakdown and depression. This year, it hasn't been as bad, but I just can't stand living here anymore! I have a duty in the UK. To film and watch the trains, to make sure my precious hobby is healthy, and I'm stuck here! I can't take it anymore!
I just wish I could persuade my parents successfully into getting us to sell our five bedroom detached house in Sunny Sidney and return to Home Sweet Home in Ware or Fakenham. Either will do, really. Fakenham doesn't have any trains, yet, but it will in the next four-five years. Ware has trains already, and it's extremely close to family, but both Fakenham and Ware are home territory.
I miss everything here, the trains, my relatives, the scenery, the hills, the food, the drink; even the thunderstorms which stay in Ware for an hour at a time! As they say, you never know what you've got until it's gone. I didn't realize there are still plenty of parts around Ware and the rest of Hertfordshire that I haven't even explored yet!
I just wish I could persuade my parents successfully into getting us to sell our five bedroom detached house in Sunny Sidney and return to Home Sweet Home in Ware or Fakenham. Either will do, really. Fakenham doesn't have any trains, yet, but it will in the next four-five years. Ware has trains already, and it's extremely close to family, but both Fakenham and Ware are home territory.
I miss everything here, the trains, my relatives, the scenery, the hills, the food, the drink; even the thunderstorms which stay in Ware for an hour at a time! As they say, you never know what you've got until it's gone. I didn't realize there are still plenty of parts around Ware and the rest of Hertfordshire that I haven't even explored yet!
Perhaps there are some railway clubs in BC that you can get involved with?
Perhaps you could persuade your parents to help you make a good set up and import stuff - a 5 bedroom house surely has good enough space for a great layout!!!!
cheers
Sep 29th 2008, 11:55 am
#26
Thread Starter
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 25
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Not when the bedrooms are no bigger than 13' by 11'. For a good layout, a bedroom needs to be at least 20' by 16'
Sep 30th 2008, 4:39 pm
#27
Thread Starter
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 25
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Unfortunately I believe yesterday's good news has dwindled to nothing already. None of my family show an inkling of desire to move back to our homeland. Apparently we don't have the money for the house I showed previously unless we sell our Canadian home first. Dad doesn't wish to do that. The best we could afford in Ware is a two bedroom semi/terrace/flat. We'll be looking for a detached three bedroom house at least if we do move. I am not suicidal. If I took that path, I would never see England again, so that path's a no-go.
The only way this family will get back to England is if the Canadian Economy goes belly-up, which hasn't happened yet, and things in England start to go the other way. That will only happen if Gordon Brown is given a good kick in the butt and education starts getting better, security at Airports coming inbound is improved, taxes enter a chain reaction of decreasing and the need to have eyes in the back of your head looking around you while in the town becomes unnecessary. I've actually found Ware, Hertfordshire to be quite a safe place. The only thing I don't like about it is the fact that suitable jobs with good wages are starting to become as rare as white rooks.
The only way this family will get back to England is if the Canadian Economy goes belly-up, which hasn't happened yet, and things in England start to go the other way. That will only happen if Gordon Brown is given a good kick in the butt and education starts getting better, security at Airports coming inbound is improved, taxes enter a chain reaction of decreasing and the need to have eyes in the back of your head looking around you while in the town becomes unnecessary. I've actually found Ware, Hertfordshire to be quite a safe place. The only thing I don't like about it is the fact that suitable jobs with good wages are starting to become as rare as white rooks.
Sep 30th 2008, 11:06 pm
#28
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 23,400
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
If I could go home, I would. But I can't. My model railway is suffering here from the lack of use and also from having two dining chairs sitting on top of it! (It was set up around the dinner table, but when my GNER 225 derailed twice due to a bent rail, I decided to pack it up. I have a mission in England.
My parents have read the posts on here twice, and are still unmoved. They won't budge, they love it here! We will only return to England if the UK economy goes up and house prices come down, and the opposite happens here.
I feel as though I'm in a dark mist, one which even the brightest of lights cannot see through. I wake up every morning and I say to myself: "What the f*** am I doing here?!"
My parents have read the posts on here twice, and are still unmoved. They won't budge, they love it here! We will only return to England if the UK economy goes up and house prices come down, and the opposite happens here.
I feel as though I'm in a dark mist, one which even the brightest of lights cannot see through. I wake up every morning and I say to myself: "What the f*** am I doing here?!"
I was just thinking of you, I used to work for British Rail many years ago in Devon. Up until recently I had all the buttons from my jacket with the British Rail logo on them, I had my National Rail timetable and my fares manual.
God I remember how excited we used to get when the steam train came into Torquay station or one time, the Orient Express.
I must dig out some of my railway piccies for you. I love the HST's that used to take me from Newton Abbot to London
Sep 30th 2008, 11:34 pm
#29
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Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 88,105
Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Unfortunately I believe yesterday's good news has dwindled to nothing already. None of my family show an inkling of desire to move back to our homeland. Apparently we don't have the money for the house I showed previously unless we sell our Canadian home first. Dad doesn't wish to do that. The best we could afford in Ware is a two bedroom semi/terrace/flat. We'll be looking for a detached three bedroom house at least if we do move. I am not suicidal. If I took that path, I would never see England again, so that path's a no-go.
The only way this family will get back to England is if the Canadian Economy goes belly-up, which hasn't happened yet, and things in England start to go the other way. That will only happen if Gordon Brown is given a good kick in the butt and education starts getting better, security at Airports coming inbound is improved, taxes enter a chain reaction of decreasing and the need to have eyes in the back of your head looking around you while in the town becomes unnecessary. I've actually found Ware, Hertfordshire to be quite a safe place. The only thing I don't like about it is the fact that suitable jobs with good wages are starting to become as rare as white rooks.
The only way this family will get back to England is if the Canadian Economy goes belly-up, which hasn't happened yet, and things in England start to go the other way. That will only happen if Gordon Brown is given a good kick in the butt and education starts getting better, security at Airports coming inbound is improved, taxes enter a chain reaction of decreasing and the need to have eyes in the back of your head looking around you while in the town becomes unnecessary. I've actually found Ware, Hertfordshire to be quite a safe place. The only thing I don't like about it is the fact that suitable jobs with good wages are starting to become as rare as white rooks.
Oct 1st 2008, 12:42 am
#30
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Location: Northern Ireland (norn iron)
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Re: Stranded, struggling, and unhappy.
Harry,
I really feel for you at the moment, but I think you should maybe focus on the present and always have the desire to come home at the back of your mind.
Ok, so now you are in Canada. If you are in school or workplace, ask a friend to go to the movies at the weekend. That might lead to more invites and take your mind of your homesickness a bit.
Why not get interested in the railway system in Canada, I know it isn't as good as England etc etc, but it still holds a great interest to you. You could share your knowledge of trains with other enthusiasts there and great friendships can blossom.
I know you miss home, but make the most of your time there. When you are older if you moved back to England without your parents, I fear you may be homesick for them. Life is hard to everyone at different times in their lives, but we are all in charge of how we cope with situations and deal with things, we have two choices 1. we wither and shrivel and give up or 2. we dust ourselves down and make the most of the situation and try and improve on it everyday.
Good luck Harry, but please be careful who you share information with, trust only your family, especially on the internet.
I really feel for you at the moment, but I think you should maybe focus on the present and always have the desire to come home at the back of your mind.
Ok, so now you are in Canada. If you are in school or workplace, ask a friend to go to the movies at the weekend. That might lead to more invites and take your mind of your homesickness a bit.
Why not get interested in the railway system in Canada, I know it isn't as good as England etc etc, but it still holds a great interest to you. You could share your knowledge of trains with other enthusiasts there and great friendships can blossom.
I know you miss home, but make the most of your time there. When you are older if you moved back to England without your parents, I fear you may be homesick for them. Life is hard to everyone at different times in their lives, but we are all in charge of how we cope with situations and deal with things, we have two choices 1. we wither and shrivel and give up or 2. we dust ourselves down and make the most of the situation and try and improve on it everyday.
Good luck Harry, but please be careful who you share information with, trust only your family, especially on the internet.
