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Should I stay or should I go???

Should I stay or should I go???

Old Apr 30th 2009, 9:40 am
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Default Should I stay or should I go???

Hi there - I am currently in Oz (for almost 3 years). I am now in Cairns though I have zipped around a bit due to being so unsettled. I started in Brisbane and loved it apart from the work culture. Went to Broome (loved the heat) then Sydney (good work culture but hated the cold) and then to Cairns (crappy work but great place to live). Went back to Europe for a holiday late last year and felt nothing in particular being back in London. Headed back to Cairns on my return but the recession has bitten into the temp market up here big time. So work of any description is now seriously hit and miss.

I love the heat (up here in the tropics) and it was my primary reason for moving to Oz. I have stuffed up completely on the job front - have done loads of temping - stuffed up several interviews for "proper" jobs, practically jumped before I was pushed on two occasions from good companies.

I really miss my London job and I have now blown most of my savings. The biggest problem is that I did not do my homework in terms of work - I have a wierd background and I am not going to get that type of work through an agency. So I took admin - and would stop looking for a real job then get bored or the contract would finish and I would start looking again. My situation was also complicated by the fact that generally I needed to be a citizen for jobs in my area. I got that in January 2009 but ----.

I had been to Oz twice before the move - once as a backpacker where I travelled all over and loved it and I also had a great 6 week trip down here several years ago.

Now I am in my late 40's, have squandered hard earned savings, live like a backpacker (in a piece of paradise) and I am losing my skills. My saving grace is that I have a job in London to go back to as I was given a 5 year Career Break.

I have this constant mental civil war re why am I still here, can I really change anything, would I be better off in London and so on.

There are more reasons to go back than to stay - not least friends and family and a job that I enjoy with a great work culture. I also miss Europe, the variety of things to do in London and so on.

I absolutely do not miss the weather, the crowds, pollution, graffitti and commuting.

So my main reason for staying in Oz and up in the tropics is the weather and glorious scenery.

Any thoughts???

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Old Apr 30th 2009, 9:46 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

How about staying till the 5 years are almost up, obtaining citizenship and an Australian passport in that time if possible and then if you do go back to UK and decide that you made a mistake you have not burnt your bridges ?
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Old Apr 30th 2009, 12:29 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Originally Posted by TheArmChairDetective
How about staying till the 5 years are almost up, obtaining citizenship and an Australian passport in that time if possible and then if you do go back to UK and decide that you made a mistake you have not burnt your bridges ?
My thoughts exactly. At least if you have citizenship, your options are open for a lot longer. How far off from this are you & would the job in London still be there for you?
The decision to stay or go is never easy as there is no way of knowing what the future holds. All you can do is really try to weigh up the pros & cons & be really honest with yourself!
Lots of luck
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Old Apr 30th 2009, 12:44 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Been a long time since first meet at The Gap & Southbank.
Good luck with your decissions, we know its not easy.
We still struggle with our eldest daughter still living in the UK.

Annette
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Old Apr 30th 2009, 3:44 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

OP says they got citizenship in Jan 09.

I would start making plans to head back to the UK. In many ways it sounds like you've had a 3 year adventure, had a blast at different locations and temperatures and working environments. But it also sounds like you feel you are getting too old to live this backpacker lifestyle for much longer.

Why not just plan out the next little chunk of your life in a not-too-structured way - ie, a good job that you love, with a reliable income, and a little bit of forward planning for the future (ie, retirement funds), start to build up your empty saving account again and then use your generous UK holiday allowances for continued travel to warm and exciting places. Just 'cos you don't live a tropical life, doesn't mean you can't go and get a fix every now and again

I would think that heading for your 50's with no job prospects and no savings is a downward slope to sleepless nights. Go back and grab your job with both hands while you can.

Sounds like you've had fun - reign it in again for a couple of years, then re-assess. Nothing is forever
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Old Apr 30th 2009, 6:03 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

I'd say Ann has given you good advice. You don't seem to have put down roots and are obviously fairly adaptable. I'd say go back before your career break time is up, settle back into work in the UK and see if you like it. If you don't, grin and bear it for a while, use the opportunity to see Europe and the rest of the UK whilst you can (we have glorious scenery over here too!), start acquiring skills that you can use in whichever location in Oz you like best, start saving money and then go back to Oz once the recession is over. At least as you have citizenship you won't be burning any boats whatever you decide. Good luck whatever you do
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Old Apr 30th 2009, 10:07 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Mega thanks for all the replies - it is so good to hear from people who know what it is like to toss and turn over the issues. I will post an update when I make a decision.

Netty - lovely to hear that you are still in Oz - have sent you a PM.

Ann - sound advice - thank you

Sue
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Old Apr 30th 2009, 10:30 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Originally Posted by sallyclaire
My thoughts exactly. At least if you have citizenship, your options are open for a lot longer. How far off from this are you & would the job in London still be there for you?
The decision to stay or go is never easy as there is no way of knowing what the future holds. All you can do is really try to weigh up the pros & cons & be really honest with yourself!
Lots of luck
Sally Claire - just had a quick look at your profile and realised that you have not been in Oz long and that you are in Cairns.

Hope it all works out for you guys!

Sue
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Old Apr 30th 2009, 10:44 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

For those who are considering a move back to the UK - stay put for the next twelve months.

Come May/June 2010 the outlook will start to get better here in the UK, but it will be a slow process. A General Election in the UK must be held by law on or before 03 June 2010 at the very latest.

Gordon Brown will be out on his backside and so will his crappy Labour Party, and Harriet Harm-a-Man Harperson will most probably be receiving treatment in some secure asylum buried deep in the Surrey countryside somewhere.
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Old May 1st 2009, 1:52 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Originally Posted by suebrennan
Sally Claire - just had a quick look at your profile and realised that you have not been in Oz long and that you are in Cairns.

Hope it all works out for you guys!

Sue
Thanks Sue!
We have lived elsewhere though & went through all the 'should we stay or go' dilemmas, so fully understand what you are going through in respect of trying to come to a decision.
Sorry I misread residency for citizenship in your original post & would have to agree with Ann, head back, save & reassess again in a few years.
Good luck!
If you would like to meet up for a coffee sometime, let me know!
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Old May 1st 2009, 2:14 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Hey thanks have sent you a pm.

Sue
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Old May 1st 2009, 2:34 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Sounds like you're getting your priorities wrong : your main reason for returning is work Work to live, not live to work

If you return you'll just get more of rubbish weather, crowds, pollution, graffitti and commuting

Stay and enjoy the great weather and great lifestyle
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Old May 1st 2009, 2:57 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Originally Posted by BAY
Sounds like you're getting your priorities wrong : your main reason for returning is work Work to live, not live to work

If you return you'll just get more of rubbish weather, crowds, pollution, graffitti and commuting

Stay and enjoy the great weather and great lifestyle
Starting to run out of money makes going back to work (especially work you really like) sound wonderful.
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Old May 1st 2009, 5:36 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Originally Posted by Mummy in the foothills
Starting to run out of money makes going back to work (especially work you really like) sound wonderful.
Right now I am sitting outside with a stunning view of the mountains and with the bay in the distance. There is an adorable belgian shepherd called Billy at my feet (he belongs to my landlord). The weather is PERFECT. And yes of course the sun is shining. I totally love it up here in Tropical North Queensland but ----.

Financially I am not in a postition to live like this indefinitely. Remember I have blown my savings in my mad scram around Oz over the past 3 years (including an initial very expensive set up in Brisbane)!

I am running out of money. I am crap at looking for work and there really is not a lot of it up here right now. And I have constant nightmares about WTF I am doing with my life.

Nothing is ever going to be perfect but I am on my own and I have not managed to find anything here in Oz that gives me the same buzz, pay, conditions or culture/colleagues as my London job. As a singleton I think work can matter regardless of how good the intrinsics are. I made a lot of friends at work in London - the job though not perfect (it had its moments and was sometimes VERY stressful) was the best I have ever had - and I have done a lot of different jobs in my life. Add sometimes very interesting work to 6 weeks paid leave, being able to wear my jeans most of the time (I had to buy smart clothes for the stupid mind numbing stuff I done here) - it takes a beating.

But I totally hate London in winter!!!

I am so glad I wrote this post as it is helping me to sort out my very scrambled thoughts. Please keep the replies coming - it is great to get other people's takes on this.

Sue
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Old May 1st 2009, 5:38 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go???

Originally Posted by Mummy in the foothills
Starting to run out of money makes going back to work (especially work you really like) sound wonderful.
Hey just noticed your location - that is another fabulous part of the world - spent a few month over that way eons ago.
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