Scared To Go Home.
May 1st 2011 | 7:24 am
#16
BE Forum Addict
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 4,393
From: England
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Dear Forum,
i so miss my country and so regret leaving all those years ago but at the time i took the easy option but now wish i had tried a lot harder,about 20yrs ago i made my way to Australia and at that younger age i had so much energy i felt strong enough to take the challenge but sadly i never felt settled in all those years and the only thing that kept me going was having a regular job with regular wages as a van driver and i guess i was content that i had thing to do and i had money in my pocket but now ive had to stop work because of health reasons after so many years loading and unloading my van and carrying heavy goods my back has been damaged so i cant do manual work anymore,im getting close to 50yr old and am lost its been difficult as without work i have been so bored,ive been wanting to return to the UK for many years now and now that i am jobless i decided that this is a good time to make plans but i have some issues that i never had last year that have caused me to really worry about the future and now just cannot relax,just recently i met the girl of my dreams and we plan to marry though i have told her that i dont want to live in Australia anymore and wish to return to the UK we discussed this and she has agreed to follow me and give up her job.After researching all the necessaries i see many difficulties in our plans:i havent works in the UK for years and have no exceptional skills to offer and although i really want to work even for minimum wages as i need to be able to prove to UK authorities that i am able to support my new wife before she will get a visa ive become petrified with what the future may hold but i know i cant live in Australia for much longer and if i dont try and sort myself out before i hit fifty then maybe it will be too late for me and the thought of being locked out depresses me.
I will be heading to London to live as that is where my family all live it would be easier if i had somewhere to live but everywhere that i have researched online only want renters if they have jobs so that counts me out,my soon to be wife will stay behind and carry on working while i go to set things up but i just dont know where to start ,reading many of the posts on B.E. with many saying there are no jobs things are tough it all just sounds so negative.
Could some one who has been in my position please say something positive my worrying head needs to smile
i so miss my country and so regret leaving all those years ago but at the time i took the easy option but now wish i had tried a lot harder,about 20yrs ago i made my way to Australia and at that younger age i had so much energy i felt strong enough to take the challenge but sadly i never felt settled in all those years and the only thing that kept me going was having a regular job with regular wages as a van driver and i guess i was content that i had thing to do and i had money in my pocket but now ive had to stop work because of health reasons after so many years loading and unloading my van and carrying heavy goods my back has been damaged so i cant do manual work anymore,im getting close to 50yr old and am lost its been difficult as without work i have been so bored,ive been wanting to return to the UK for many years now and now that i am jobless i decided that this is a good time to make plans but i have some issues that i never had last year that have caused me to really worry about the future and now just cannot relax,just recently i met the girl of my dreams and we plan to marry though i have told her that i dont want to live in Australia anymore and wish to return to the UK we discussed this and she has agreed to follow me and give up her job.After researching all the necessaries i see many difficulties in our plans:i havent works in the UK for years and have no exceptional skills to offer and although i really want to work even for minimum wages as i need to be able to prove to UK authorities that i am able to support my new wife before she will get a visa ive become petrified with what the future may hold but i know i cant live in Australia for much longer and if i dont try and sort myself out before i hit fifty then maybe it will be too late for me and the thought of being locked out depresses me.
I will be heading to London to live as that is where my family all live it would be easier if i had somewhere to live but everywhere that i have researched online only want renters if they have jobs so that counts me out,my soon to be wife will stay behind and carry on working while i go to set things up but i just dont know where to start ,reading many of the posts on B.E. with many saying there are no jobs things are tough it all just sounds so negative.
Could some one who has been in my position please say something positive my worrying head needs to smile
May 1st 2011 | 8:58 am
#17
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 8,390
From: Canberra
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Just want to wish you all the best with whatever you decide!
Moving countries is a daunting and scary prospect at any age but moving when you are older is even more scary IMHO. However, if Aus doesnt float your boat after all these years, it isnt likely to start doing so now so escape while you can I reckon.
You might want to look around for live in caretaker type jobs - kill two birds with one stone that way - and hopefully your back wont be that much of an issue if there isnt too much heavy lifting to do.
Good luck with your new family and hopefully your new beginning!
Moving countries is a daunting and scary prospect at any age but moving when you are older is even more scary IMHO. However, if Aus doesnt float your boat after all these years, it isnt likely to start doing so now so escape while you can I reckon.
You might want to look around for live in caretaker type jobs - kill two birds with one stone that way - and hopefully your back wont be that much of an issue if there isnt too much heavy lifting to do.
Good luck with your new family and hopefully your new beginning!
May 1st 2011 | 12:40 pm
#18
Thread Starter
advocatus diaboli
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 320
Re: Scared To Go Home.
thanks again for all your support,its amazing how many people on this forum who went off to begin a new life with all the best intentions only to return years later to start all over again,i have no regrets about Australia as its a great country but a just cant seem to shift those feelings of returning to my roots.I suppose if i get a bit of luck and perhaps get a job quite early on my return i will soon forget most of what i am worrying about but its the unknown that bothers me yet i do think if i dont take those baby steps now then maybe i never will.
I read alot about the financial situation the country is in and wonder if it really is as bad as the papers make out,what with so much BS in the media these days i wonder why i haven't bought a newspaper for probably 10yrs.
Anyway i am looking forward to starting the process towards my return after i tie up a few things in Australia so could be looking at around September not the best time weather wise i guess,although i hear the British summer starts and finishes a bit later these days.
Thanks again
May 1st 2011 | 1:30 pm
#19
Finally Home!
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 3,610
From: Used to be New York, now North Yorkshire
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Honestly I don't think it is. The British media is just relentlessly negative. Unemployment is Britain is significantly below unemployment here in the US and yet people here don't whine half as much as people in Britain do.
May 1st 2011 | 2:09 pm
#20
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 397
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Hi Panhandle.
Totally understand your predicament here.
I understand the slow building home sickness and also the feeling of a need to resettle and that you maybe should have done it sooner.
20 years is a fair whack though mate and things have changed both in terms of lifestyle, environment and employment, and you are older and probably more set in your ways than you realise.
Rather than put so much pressure on yourself to 'up and leave' is there any way you can possibly do a trip over and spend a couple of months in the UK. Cash in some family chips and stay with family and get a sense of whether it is going to work or not. That way, if after a couple of months you actually realise that the UK you left in 1991 is a different UK to today and work is or isnt realistic in your situation?
I had those feelings of returning to my Roots, and after 8 years in Australia I returned to the uk. i was able to secure a decent job within 6 weeks, however I soon realised after about 3-4 months the things i thought bothered me in Australia were not an issue and I had changed alot, felt alien in the UK and came back to Australia with a renewed feeling, and actually felt like i was returning home, which was nice.
I am not saying you will come anywhere close to feeling that, but what I did was tell everyone and myself that I was going OS for 6-12 months to see how it played out.
I am sure 8-12 weeks apart from your wife wouldnt be the end of the world if it enabled you to work out for yourself if its worth the BIG move or not. At the very least it will answer your question potentially.
Good luck
Totally understand your predicament here.
I understand the slow building home sickness and also the feeling of a need to resettle and that you maybe should have done it sooner.
20 years is a fair whack though mate and things have changed both in terms of lifestyle, environment and employment, and you are older and probably more set in your ways than you realise.
Rather than put so much pressure on yourself to 'up and leave' is there any way you can possibly do a trip over and spend a couple of months in the UK. Cash in some family chips and stay with family and get a sense of whether it is going to work or not. That way, if after a couple of months you actually realise that the UK you left in 1991 is a different UK to today and work is or isnt realistic in your situation?
I had those feelings of returning to my Roots, and after 8 years in Australia I returned to the uk. i was able to secure a decent job within 6 weeks, however I soon realised after about 3-4 months the things i thought bothered me in Australia were not an issue and I had changed alot, felt alien in the UK and came back to Australia with a renewed feeling, and actually felt like i was returning home, which was nice.
I am not saying you will come anywhere close to feeling that, but what I did was tell everyone and myself that I was going OS for 6-12 months to see how it played out.
I am sure 8-12 weeks apart from your wife wouldnt be the end of the world if it enabled you to work out for yourself if its worth the BIG move or not. At the very least it will answer your question potentially.
Good luck
May 2nd 2011 | 2:19 am
#21
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 472
From: Carlsbad , Ca
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Panhandle :Regarding not having a clue what kind of job you want. Get yourself a book called "What color is you parachute" and work through it . It will help you figure out what kind of work / fields interest you.
May 2nd 2011 | 2:53 am
#22
Thread Starter
advocatus diaboli
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 320
Re: Scared To Go Home.
sallysimmons seems to me that since the birth of the internet (www) its been a free for all when it comes to information, i sometimes wonder what the real effects this is having on the world at large,they say ignorance is bliss and i can believe that yet it seems the masses have been tamed to follow more than ever before.
I think negative news sells, unfortunately we are more interested in disasters than happy endings and they know how to recycle all the bad stuff and shove it down our throats 24/7.
Im sure it never use to be like that but like the hour hand on a clock the change is so slow you wont see it move but its happening.Everything seems so complicated these days im surprised they haven't built more lunatic asylums.
Sherro like i said i wont go knocking on the family door as there is no room at the inn,i know i have been away a longtime but i have been back a few times for short visits and always promised myself i would oneday return for keeps.
This time is different this time i can maybe buy a place to live in something i never could do in the past so really that was the stumbling block in the past so if i have my own place i should be ok.
I know i will take a hit with the lifestyle bit but im ok with that as im not a materialistic type and i love to work so having a job is a must,ive done the beach thing and am over that a longtime ago just want a regular life with regular surroundings.
Im not sure but i think its a age thing with me 10 yrs ago if i had returned to the UK like you did and maybe i would also of packed up and returned back to Australia as at that time lifestyle was still a factor to me,but now ive changed and yes perhaps its an age thing.
After 20years in full employment i have forgotten how to get a job everybody want so much information about your past even for the jobs nobody wants to do !
Its ironic but i have trouble remembering numbers especially telephone numbers yet i never forgot my NI number even after all these years its still fresh in my mind,i cant even remember my Australian tax file number and even my mobile number i forget maybe it a sign !
Anyway im not yet married but its on the cards but i fear i will be away from her for much more than the 8-10 weeks you mentioned .
Thanks all
I think negative news sells, unfortunately we are more interested in disasters than happy endings and they know how to recycle all the bad stuff and shove it down our throats 24/7.
Im sure it never use to be like that but like the hour hand on a clock the change is so slow you wont see it move but its happening.Everything seems so complicated these days im surprised they haven't built more lunatic asylums.
Sherro like i said i wont go knocking on the family door as there is no room at the inn,i know i have been away a longtime but i have been back a few times for short visits and always promised myself i would oneday return for keeps.
This time is different this time i can maybe buy a place to live in something i never could do in the past so really that was the stumbling block in the past so if i have my own place i should be ok.
I know i will take a hit with the lifestyle bit but im ok with that as im not a materialistic type and i love to work so having a job is a must,ive done the beach thing and am over that a longtime ago just want a regular life with regular surroundings.
Im not sure but i think its a age thing with me 10 yrs ago if i had returned to the UK like you did and maybe i would also of packed up and returned back to Australia as at that time lifestyle was still a factor to me,but now ive changed and yes perhaps its an age thing.
After 20years in full employment i have forgotten how to get a job everybody want so much information about your past even for the jobs nobody wants to do !
Its ironic but i have trouble remembering numbers especially telephone numbers yet i never forgot my NI number even after all these years its still fresh in my mind,i cant even remember my Australian tax file number and even my mobile number i forget
maybe it a sign !Anyway im not yet married but its on the cards but i fear i will be away from her for much more than the 8-10 weeks you mentioned .
Thanks all
Last edited by Panhandle; May 2nd 2011 at 2:55 am.
May 2nd 2011 | 2:59 am
#23
Thread Starter
advocatus diaboli
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 320
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Thanks Englishman i will look into that online now,thanks for your input really welcome
May 2nd 2011 | 3:09 am
#24
Home Sweet Home
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 5,128
From: Surrey, England
Re: Scared To Go Home.
sallysimmons seems to me that since the birth of the internet (www) its been a free for all when it comes to information, i sometimes wonder what the real effects this is having on the world at large,they say ignorance is bliss and i can believe that yet it seems the masses have been tamed to follow more than ever before.
I think negative news sells, unfortunately we are more interested in disasters than happy endings and they know how to recycle all the bad stuff and shove it down our throats 24/7.
Im sure it never use to be like that but like the hour hand on a clock the change is so slow you wont see it move but its happening.Everything seems so complicated these days im surprised they haven't built more lunatic asylums.
Sherro like i said i wont go knocking on the family door as there is no room at the inn,i know i have been away a longtime but i have been back a few times for short visits and always promised myself i would oneday return for keeps.
This time is different this time i can maybe buy a place to live in something i never could do in the past so really that was the stumbling block in the past so if i have my own place i should be ok.
I know i will take a hit with the lifestyle bit but im ok with that as im not a materialistic type and i love to work so having a job is a must,ive done the beach thing and am over that a longtime ago just want a regular life with regular surroundings.
Im not sure but i think its a age thing with me 10 yrs ago if i had returned to the UK like you did and maybe i would also of packed up and returned back to Australia as at that time lifestyle was still a factor to me,but now ive changed and yes perhaps its an age thing.
After 20years in full employment i have forgotten how to get a job everybody want so much information about your past even for the jobs nobody wants to do !
Its ironic but i have trouble remembering numbers especially telephone numbers yet i never forgot my NI number even after all these years its still fresh in my mind,i cant even remember my Australian tax file number and even my mobile number i forget maybe it a sign !
Anyway im not yet married but its on the cards but i fear i will be away from her for much more than the 8-10 weeks you mentioned .
Thanks all
I think negative news sells, unfortunately we are more interested in disasters than happy endings and they know how to recycle all the bad stuff and shove it down our throats 24/7.
Im sure it never use to be like that but like the hour hand on a clock the change is so slow you wont see it move but its happening.Everything seems so complicated these days im surprised they haven't built more lunatic asylums.
Sherro like i said i wont go knocking on the family door as there is no room at the inn,i know i have been away a longtime but i have been back a few times for short visits and always promised myself i would oneday return for keeps.
This time is different this time i can maybe buy a place to live in something i never could do in the past so really that was the stumbling block in the past so if i have my own place i should be ok.
I know i will take a hit with the lifestyle bit but im ok with that as im not a materialistic type and i love to work so having a job is a must,ive done the beach thing and am over that a longtime ago just want a regular life with regular surroundings.
Im not sure but i think its a age thing with me 10 yrs ago if i had returned to the UK like you did and maybe i would also of packed up and returned back to Australia as at that time lifestyle was still a factor to me,but now ive changed and yes perhaps its an age thing.
After 20years in full employment i have forgotten how to get a job everybody want so much information about your past even for the jobs nobody wants to do !
Its ironic but i have trouble remembering numbers especially telephone numbers yet i never forgot my NI number even after all these years its still fresh in my mind,i cant even remember my Australian tax file number and even my mobile number i forget
maybe it a sign !Anyway im not yet married but its on the cards but i fear i will be away from her for much more than the 8-10 weeks you mentioned .
Thanks all
http://www.thepropertyoctopus.co.uk/index.html
As I said I haven't used the service, just looked into it as I was deciding my next move and had bookmarked it.
How about renting a furnished flat on a 6 month lease say? You have to pay the holding fee - around £150.00 for them to do your checks and take it off the market, then it is usually 1 months bond and 1 months rent in advance.
However in your case (and mine) as we are unemployed and have no real history in the UK you can pay 6 months rent in advance or pay 1 months rent in advance and get somebody to go guarantor for you, this person must be in full time employment and earning x amount of pounds per annum.
I am using the second option and my sister will go guarantor for me, in my case the x amount of earnings was £16,000 but I am not sure if it is dependent on the rental price??
May 2nd 2011 | 5:57 pm
#25
Thread Starter
advocatus diaboli
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 320
Re: Scared To Go Home.
As you don't wish to live with family I thought this would interest you, it's a website for short term accommodation, now this is for Manchester only, but there must be other services like this in the UK.
http://www.thepropertyoctopus.co.uk/index.html
As I said I haven't used the service, just looked into it as I was deciding my next move and had bookmarked it.
How about renting a furnished flat on a 6 month lease say? You have to pay the holding fee - around £150.00 for them to do your checks and take it off the market, then it is usually 1 months bond and 1 months rent in advance.
However in your case (and mine) as we are unemployed and have no real history in the UK you can pay 6 months rent in advance or pay 1 months rent in advance and get somebody to go guarantor for you, this person must be in full time employment and earning x amount of pounds per annum.
I am using the second option and my sister will go guarantor for me, in my case the x amount of earnings was £16,000 but I am not sure if it is dependent on the rental price??
http://www.thepropertyoctopus.co.uk/index.html
As I said I haven't used the service, just looked into it as I was deciding my next move and had bookmarked it.
How about renting a furnished flat on a 6 month lease say? You have to pay the holding fee - around £150.00 for them to do your checks and take it off the market, then it is usually 1 months bond and 1 months rent in advance.
However in your case (and mine) as we are unemployed and have no real history in the UK you can pay 6 months rent in advance or pay 1 months rent in advance and get somebody to go guarantor for you, this person must be in full time employment and earning x amount of pounds per annum.
I am using the second option and my sister will go guarantor for me, in my case the x amount of earnings was £16,000 but I am not sure if it is dependent on the rental price??
Beedubya pity that that site services Manchester,i would certainly feel a little less scared to return home if i knew there were services available to me at reasonable prices and organized also.
It may be the case that i will have to go stay at a backpacker type accommodation to begin with as its cheap and i dont want to dip too much into my savings as i know how quickly they could diminish.
London seems to have so many people looking for accommodation so just that aspect is a challenge.
Ive looked at house sharing sites etc but all seem to want people with jobs ,paying up front for six months is an option i guess.
I have no guarantor im on my own ( my life story
) i guess im due some luck so maybe i may get a few breaks .Thank Beedubya
May 2nd 2011 | 7:19 pm
#26
Home Sweet Home
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 5,128
From: Surrey, England
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Beedubya pity that that site services Manchester,i would certainly feel a little less scared to return home if i knew there were services available to me at reasonable prices and organized also.
It may be the case that i will have to go stay at a backpacker type accommodation to begin with as its cheap and i dont want to dip too much into my savings as i know how quickly they could diminish.
London seems to have so many people looking for accommodation so just that aspect is a challenge.
Ive looked at house sharing sites etc but all seem to want people with jobs ,paying up front for six months is an option i guess.
I have no guarantor im on my own ( my life story ) i guess im due some luck so maybe i may get a few breaks .
Thank Beedubya
It may be the case that i will have to go stay at a backpacker type accommodation to begin with as its cheap and i dont want to dip too much into my savings as i know how quickly they could diminish.
London seems to have so many people looking for accommodation so just that aspect is a challenge.
Ive looked at house sharing sites etc but all seem to want people with jobs ,paying up front for six months is an option i guess.
I have no guarantor im on my own ( my life story
) i guess im due some luck so maybe i may get a few breaks .Thank Beedubya
), shared housing, short term lets................Maybe you could look into another part of the country as London is going to be MEGA expensive.
As you are making this BIG move back and don't seem to have family ties, maybe it's time to explore the rest of this beautiful country.
Also you could look for live in jobs, hotels, private homes, etc. Lots of live-in jobs in The Lady:
http://www.lady.co.uk/lady_classifie.../Domestic%20UK
May 2nd 2011 | 7:29 pm
#27
Ping-ponger
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 12,090
From: Yam Yam land
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Beedubya pity that that site services Manchester,i would certainly feel a little less scared to return home if i knew there were services available to me at reasonable prices and organized also.
It may be the case that i will have to go stay at a backpacker type accommodation to begin with as its cheap and i dont want to dip too much into my savings as i know how quickly they could diminish.
London seems to have so many people looking for accommodation so just that aspect is a challenge.
Ive looked at house sharing sites etc but all seem to want people with jobs ,paying up front for six months is an option i guess.
I have no guarantor im on my own ( my life story ) i guess im due some luck so maybe i may get a few breaks .
Thank Beedubya
It may be the case that i will have to go stay at a backpacker type accommodation to begin with as its cheap and i dont want to dip too much into my savings as i know how quickly they could diminish.
London seems to have so many people looking for accommodation so just that aspect is a challenge.
Ive looked at house sharing sites etc but all seem to want people with jobs ,paying up front for six months is an option i guess.
I have no guarantor im on my own ( my life story
) i guess im due some luck so maybe i may get a few breaks .Thank Beedubya
Last edited by dunroving; May 2nd 2011 at 7:31 pm.
May 2nd 2011 | 9:24 pm
#28
Thread Starter
advocatus diaboli
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 320
Re: Scared To Go Home.
There is LOTS of accommodation for rent anywhere within the vicinity of a University, be it bed-sits (called studio apartments now ), shared housing, short term lets................
Maybe you could look into another part of the country as London is going to be MEGA expensive.
As you are making this BIG move back and don't seem to have family ties, maybe it's time to explore the rest of this beautiful country.
Also you could look for live in jobs, hotels, private homes, etc. Lots of live-in jobs in The Lady:
http://www.lady.co.uk/lady_classifie.../Domestic%20UK
), shared housing, short term lets................Maybe you could look into another part of the country as London is going to be MEGA expensive.
As you are making this BIG move back and don't seem to have family ties, maybe it's time to explore the rest of this beautiful country.
Also you could look for live in jobs, hotels, private homes, etc. Lots of live-in jobs in The Lady:
http://www.lady.co.uk/lady_classifie.../Domestic%20UK
I know the British Isle's are very beautiful i have travels to many nice places.
I just have this dream to go back to where i grew up have a place to live and a regular job and share this with my then wife,not an unrealistic dream just a modest one
.I will do any job even work for minimum wage because i feel my real reward will be the peace of mind that has been missing all these years.Im not sure what my future wife's job will be as she has some skills though i guess she wont want to sit around too long so will take something just to keep working as she is the positive one
Dunroving yes i have checked that website its got some good selections,i had an an idea i may go to London and check into some cheap backpacker type place and then go looking at the ads in the news agents windows they always seemed to have people advertising rooms just a thought.
Thank so much .
Last edited by Panhandle; May 2nd 2011 at 9:30 pm.
May 2nd 2011 | 9:28 pm
#29
Home Sweet Home
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 5,128
From: Surrey, England
Re: Scared To Go Home.
Beedubya yes London so expensive but unfortunately thats where my roots are, i have many friends plus family that i would like to be close to friends from my teen years,i know the British Isle are very beautiful i have travels to many nice places.
I just have this dream to go back to where i grew up have a place to live and a regular job and share this with my then wife,not an unrealistic dream just a modest one .
I will do any job even work for minimum wage because i feel my real reward will be the peace of mind that has been missing all these years.
Im not sure what my future wife job will be as she has some skills though i guess she wont want to sit around too long so will take something just to keep working as she is the positive one
Dunroving yes i have checked that website its got some good selections,just an idea i may go to London and check into some cheap backpacker type place and then go looking at the ads in the news agents windows they always seemed to have people advertising rooms just a though.
Thank so much .
I just have this dream to go back to where i grew up have a place to live and a regular job and share this with my then wife,not an unrealistic dream just a modest one
.I will do any job even work for minimum wage because i feel my real reward will be the peace of mind that has been missing all these years.
Im not sure what my future wife job will be as she has some skills though i guess she wont want to sit around too long so will take something just to keep working as she is the positive one
Dunroving yes i have checked that website its got some good selections,just an idea i may go to London and check into some cheap backpacker type place and then go looking at the ads in the news agents windows they always seemed to have people advertising rooms just a though.
Thank so much .
http://uk.easyroommate.com/sbox/lp/V...FUEb4QodIBsEqg
May 2nd 2011 | 9:36 pm
#30
Thread Starter
advocatus diaboli
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 320
Re: Scared To Go Home.
You can also create a profile on easyroommate and people will contact you, it's free.
http://uk.easyroommate.com/sbox/lp/V...FUEb4QodIBsEqg
http://uk.easyroommate.com/sbox/lp/V...FUEb4QodIBsEqg
I looked at that website but without appearing negative me without job status verses those with jobs plus professional type jobs i just feel like im at a job interview with a thousand applicants
i know thats negative of me and what with the photo gallery it looks more like a dating site 
Thanks
