Regrets??
#16
BE Enthusiast




Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 380
From: Darwin, NT











This is also one of my worries after just 8 months.I 'm not sure I want to be here but when I think about my old life not sure about that either, I feel the same today as I did when I arrived. I have joined a club, am very positive but it's just not happening. I do miss family and friends but more my old life. This place is draining me fiancially and emotionally.I work, work and work here for less money than the U.K and have no time at all.I have no fun anymore and just exist here. People say give it time but what will change. We have a good few friends here already and that is not what bothers me.
I was going to go back next April but I am thinking this June / July but I feel it is probably too soon, any thoughts?
Sorry to ramble on feel sorry for myself but need to get it off my chest. I am so unhappy here and really try to be but it only lasts a week or so and I feel the same.
I was going to go back next April but I am thinking this June / July but I feel it is probably too soon, any thoughts?
Sorry to ramble on feel sorry for myself but need to get it off my chest. I am so unhappy here and really try to be but it only lasts a week or so and I feel the same.
Best of luck with whatever you decide to do.
#18
I could rant on about what it is about the UK that is so crap, but I think that way of looking at it is a mistake. A person's happiness in a place is as much to do with the person as it is to do with the place. There seems to be a lot of stuff on MBTTUK these days about why Oz is so crap, but then I think If it's so crap why do so many expats love it? Ditto for the UK. The UK isn't crap, it just doesn't suit me (or more accurately, my situation in the UK, compared to what it was/could be in the US doesn't suit me). Just a few reasons below:
Professionally, working in the US was much more rewarding for me.
Also, professionally, the level of academic freedom in the US suited me a lot more than here.
Due to the insane house prices here, I have gone from being almost mortgage-free in the US (in fact, by now I would have been completely mortgage-free) to having a £150k mortgage at the age of 52.
I fit in better in the US than the UK (I left the UK at 25 and was gone for almost 25 years)
I prefer the US national identity more than the UK (in other words, the bad parts of the US identity don't get to me nearly as much as the bad parts of the UK identity)
I don't have major family ties in the UK, which seems to be a major reason for most expats who successfully resettle in the UK.
I much prefer the US weather (for some it's not a big deal that it rains so much in the UK; for me it's a huge deal)
If I were to name the top 3 factors that draw me back to the US and make the UK a difficult place for me, I'd say (1) Professional/working conditions; (2) quality of life/cost of living; and (3) effect of weather on my particular lifestyle.
If anyone thinks any of this is bollocks (e.g., if you think the UK weather is not a big deal), you're entitled to your opinion; these are just my reasons why I am unhappy in the UK.
Last edited by dunroving; May 4th 2009 at 12:48 am.
#19
BE Forum Addict






Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,756
From: homeless











Do you regret something ??
Last edited by crap coffee; May 4th 2009 at 1:23 am.
#20
BE Enthusiast





Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 839











None! Been there. Now I get to appreciate the things I took for granted in Scotland,England,Ireland and Europe.
Australia was good but different and mostly inferior.
I would never have been able to kid myself that it was better than what I had at home.
Ill always have fond memories of the place and people that I met, but touching down at Heathrow was a great moment in my life.
Australia was good but different and mostly inferior.
I would never have been able to kid myself that it was better than what I had at home.
Ill always have fond memories of the place and people that I met, but touching down at Heathrow was a great moment in my life.
#21
I think if my working life in the US was more like in the UK I would be much happier here, and is one of the things that is making me want to return to the UK.
#22
I'd love to know why you think working conditions are better in the US than the UK, is it specific to your job? Its one of my biggest problems with living in the states and my hubby complains of the same things at his company. I hate the sterile atmosphere, no laughing and joking, very PC, cubes, being seen to work long hours but not actually working very hard, lack of vacation time, no one makes you a cuppa, no friendships are made, nobody makes decisions, not being able to say you have a problem with someone or something to their face but having to run off to HR.
I think if my working life in the US was more like in the UK I would be much happier here, and is one of the things that is making me want to return to the UK.
I think if my working life in the US was more like in the UK I would be much happier here, and is one of the things that is making me want to return to the UK.
But I do realize that for many professions, the US is a tough place to work. Even though I took very few days vacation, I had a lot more flexibility (i.e., I could have taken off far more if I wanted, I just loved my job so much I didn't want to take days off ...)
#23
I work in higher education. While the workload was not much different in the US to here (much of it self-imposed), there was infinitely more academic freedom, a greater sense of collegiality, more respectful and hardworking students, more accessible funding for research, greater access to postgraduate students, much less busy work and bureaucracy ... I could go on.
But I do realize that for many professions, the US is a tough place to work. Even though I took very few days vacation, I had a lot more flexibility (i.e., I could have taken off far more if I wanted, I just loved my job so much I didn't want to take days off ...)
But I do realize that for many professions, the US is a tough place to work. Even though I took very few days vacation, I had a lot more flexibility (i.e., I could have taken off far more if I wanted, I just loved my job so much I didn't want to take days off ...)
Hope you get back to where you want to be. Its easy to forget that you spend more waking hours at work than at home, its really important to be happy doing something you like.
#24
I returned once and didn't regret it. I don't regret returning to US the second time either.
I have loved living in both places, I just want to live back home now, but we'll see how long that move will take this time. I'm hoping to be back and settled in three more years (kids/school graduations/retirements etc need sorting)
I have loved living in both places, I just want to live back home now, but we'll see how long that move will take this time. I'm hoping to be back and settled in three more years (kids/school graduations/retirements etc need sorting)
#25
I didnt regret it necessarily but I lived in Aus from 99-08 and started getting really homesick in 2006 and in 2008 decided to head back for a year to see what it was like and bond with family..
Moved to London, man it was hard, London is fantastic to visit but living there was challenging...
I had changed, my friends had changed, I got used to the lifestyle in Melbourne and missed it badly.
So I came back and havent looked back. I didnt leave the UK in 99 to emigrate, i just went to backpack and settled here so i have no grip on either side of the pond, just prefer Melbourne and needed 8 months back in london to realise WHY.
Moved to London, man it was hard, London is fantastic to visit but living there was challenging...
I had changed, my friends had changed, I got used to the lifestyle in Melbourne and missed it badly.
So I came back and havent looked back. I didnt leave the UK in 99 to emigrate, i just went to backpack and settled here so i have no grip on either side of the pond, just prefer Melbourne and needed 8 months back in london to realise WHY.
Bang on, absolutely agree. I ended up for 4 years back in London and hated every single minute. It was so strange. I didnt want to see many old friends cos i was trying to pretend I still was away. Moving back made life exciting again, something to look forward to. Once you emigrate and the dust has settled there's this feeling of, ok, what now?
Last edited by Londonuck; May 6th 2009 at 8:11 pm.
#26
no regrets love being home in Ireland, might move out of Carlow but the most travelling I will do is a holiday then back home to were I belong 





