Laura_Jayne

Is this the same for you wherever you are moving from?

When I tell other Brits here in the Middle East that I'm moving back to the UK, they feel the need to tell me I'm crazy and list the reasons why I shouldn't go like the weather, no jobs, financial crisis, yobs etc. etc.

It's not like I'm trying to make a decision and I'm asking their opinion. I'm teling them that this is what I'm doing and I find it very thoughtless of them to say these things. Does anyone else experience this? Why do they do it?? It's obviously not for my benefit.

I'd like to clarify that these people aren't my friends, who have been genuinely supportive here, but just acquaintances and friends of friends.

dunroving

It's a common response, and I think there's something typically British about it. They just can't help themselves.

Don't let it bother you.

Bootleg

We are moving from Dubai and the attitude is exactly the same I do wonder if people think before they speak. Do they think we will change our minds because they point out how bad it will be That said, for quite few years we did say we would never mover back. Now I am counting the days (9 weeks today).

I was back for a week over easter and I have to say people were so friendly and chatty. I will miss my maid and the sunshine but I'm ready to go.

Mummy in the foothills

I was expecting the same, but just let some of my face book friends in UK know I'm ready to move back and they are all happy and think it's about time. The US friends are just a bit confused, not sure why I'd want to move but understand it's home I'm heading too.
It's hard to ignore the negative, we got that from family years back when we decided to move, This time I'll not say much to those who were so negative last time around.
I suppose at least you'll know who your friends really are after this, they'll be the ones supporting you in the decision thats right for you.
Some take it as some sort of slight on them that you aren't staying.

Sarah

One of the traits I loathe more than anything else about British people is their ability to be negative, pessimistic and to complain about anything and everything. The "whinging pom" title is much deserved.

I've no advice for you, other than to just nod, smile and walk away. Or to perhaps tell them you love being in the company of chavs, dog poo, and hoodies, so you're are moving back to the UK?
Or on a more serious note, if you feel you could do it, you could always tell them that their opinion on your life choices is neither invited nor required.

from my experience, the response from every Brit who hasn't ever lived abroad is always, ALWAYS, "What do you wanna come back here for?"
I find it very tiresome.

johnh009

You have to question where these people came from in the UK. Let's face it, the back streets of Middlesborough are much different to the Sussex or Dorset coast. Check out the crime stats for an area before you buy, you will soon get a reasonable picture.

http://www.upmystreet.com/local/crime-in-uk.html

robin1234

However, many would prefer Middlesbrough to the Sussex or Dorset coast, if that is where friends, family and childhood associations etc. are. And some of the nicest places in England are within easy reach of Middlesbrough.. Teesdale, Saltburn-by-the-Sea, the Cleveland Way for walking...

Schbang

Yes, i spent most of my life in Surrey/ East Sussex, before 4 years in Aus and 6 years in Denmark then Singapore, and have just returned to live in Darlington, where most of my family now live, a stones throw from Middlesbrough, and I love it here!

I never thought I'd say it but now that I'm here I am far happier calling the North East and Co. Durham home than I ever was in Surrey/ East Sussex.

You get chav's and crime everywhere, but it's more to do with your neighbourhood than your city or region.

robin1234

I would love to move to the North East. Unfortunately my wife would not agree as she doesn't like the cold/damp, so we are looking at South Devon. My family are originally from South Shields, and until recently I had family in Darlington... it sounds like a really nice town, and of course the railway connections make it an attractive proposition. Our son went to Durham University for his masters degree and he loved it there.. he cycled & walked extensively in County Durham and Northumberland, and went somewhere for a football match; Stockton, maybe? Quite an eye-opener for a lad brought up in rural New York, he hasn't been back to America since except for family visits!!

Brat1

I'm kind of with Sarah on this one. I would just nod, smile and ignore it. I'm interested to know if these people are originally from the UK or not. Yes, I think there are bad points about the UK but at the end of the day, there's bad points everywhere you decide to call home. If the pull of home is such that you think it's time to move back, you go with your instincts. I love the US, even though it's been a tough move, but I cannot say at this point that we will be here forever. I miss a lot about "home" and I certainly miss my family. And to be honest, if I did decide to go back and got the same attitude you've encountered, I really wouldn't let it bother me. This is your life, your choice and I wish you all the best for your future

Sally Redux

Some Brits who live here have set themselves up as Lord and Lady Muck and the fact they would be nothing back in the UK colours their attitudes.

We were seriously considering a move back last year, I have to say that friends and family back in England were very positive about it and no-one asked why we'd want to.

brits1

When we did inform our "friends" we were heading home we did get mix responses...I was expecting it though as that's human nature but I still found it unsettling....and I have to say our friends were from all over the globe and we still had negative remarks even from friends who had never been to the UK..luckily my OH is very down to earth and use to say "people judge from their own persective and how they lead their own lives" which and was nothing like our own experiences etc and what we did find was 90% of people who did say we were mad usually came from not so nice areas and jobs etc ....so just do what you think is right..yes it is unsettling to hear comments like you have but it's for a short period until you make your move home..good luck

Returnee

I don't think it's a negative attitude to point out some of the problems in society. For example, there does seem to be a housing problem in Britain. According to TV's Panorama program nearly five million people are on a waiting list for social housing that most of them will not receive. Many families, especially in Sheffield, are living in cramped, appalling conditons. This does not bode well for society as a whole.

ottotheboar

Very good point re the Lord / Lady muck, I found that was quite common when I lived in the Middle east

Englishmum

It's true. People actually do sometimes 're-invent' themselves. They would probably be horrified if their fellow expats really knew the truth about their backgrounds