We had friends round for a barbecue and of course the conversation got round to "so are you going back to England or not?"

We said that we don't know yet, we can't decide, they feel that we are avoiding telling them and then the questioning started.

OH carried on cooking and remained mostly out of ear shot, I got the interrogation, I didn't mind OH keeping out of it, no problem there at all, I am more than able to take it, on the surface.

However inside I was feeling near to tears.

Why can't people understand that I just want to go home!!

I know that they want me to stay and I understand that they will be sad to see me go but I can't stay to make them happy.

I just feel so upset by it all, it is more complicated than I could have ever imagined.

I am so glad that I found these boards, it is good to know that I am not the only mentally unstable selfish cow around.

Bramblebush - sending you a big ((hug)).
It must be very difficult if you just want to come home. Is there not anyway you can speak with your OH about how you feel?
How long have you been in France?
J x

Sorry, I didn't explain very well, too busy being angry.

OH feels the same as me, we both want to come home, we just haven't made the final decision yet.

We have been here nearly 2 years.

Thanks for the hug x

It's o.k.
Is the area too remote/jobs/family?
It's good that you both feel the same. I understand how stressful it must all be at this time, but just think that if you had not tried your dreams you would still be wondering what if....
I just believe that you should go for it and if it doesn't work just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start again. Nothing ventured nothing gained.
J x

Yes the area is remote and the job prospects are almost none existant.

The main reason though is family, friends familiarity and the feeling of belonging.

You need to do what is going to make you and your OH happy, not everyone else.

I know how it feels to get the third degree all the time about what exactly we are doing. I am getting very good at ignoring the jibes and developing a thick skin, although the remarks are coming from m.i.l and s.i.l rather than friends, so honestly I think it is more to do with loosing touch with my kids than anything else.

I cannot believe that I have only just found these boards - 6 years of nothing and then just when we might be moving back I find some like minded folks to chat with.

Take care, thoughts are with you.

Hey, you are not being selfish or unstable!

You just want to go home.... tried it, didnt want it forever!!

LibbyX

I understand all of those. There are some wonderful people on this forum if you ever need a friendly chat many of us are or have been in the same boat.
I really feel for you.
Feel free to pm me
J x

Here, here!
J x

Thats exactly it ! A couple of years is an adventure, making it home for the rest of eternity is another story.

We are starting to feel like we are coming to the end of a long working holiday thats all. No big deal. Just ready to pack up and move back to all the cosy familiar stuff we haven't seen for the last couple of years. And hopefully look upon our homeland with a renewed sense of appreciation !

Trust me when I say, it gets a lot less stressful when you finally make a joint decision and stick to it. I have seen my hubby's sense of self return now that i support him in his quest to go home. He is not distracted anymore coz he was constantly worrying about it the whole time.

I just think your friends are ver upset that you are going. They probably enjoy your company and if you are not there anymore it will affect their life too. People react in different ways and they are going to try their best to make you stay .

You must do what is right for you though. They will get over it and if they are true friends they will still keep in touch.

All I see to be getting at the moment is my mates saying...

"What the hell do you want to go back there for.....what can you get over there that you can not get here"?

Oh, let me think....

Dont think I need to tell you lot, but they dont seem to get it!

Stopped talking about it now with them....I know I am going home, they know I am going home(not soon enough though....bloody money!!) so dont need to go on about it anymore

Bramblebush, tell em all to shut up and talk about something else....

Just come on here and vent all you like.....we support you and understand where you are coming from!

LibbyX

Oh this takes me back, you can imagine the comments we have had with the ping ponging we have done! I have heard it all, same as Libby "why do you want to go back to that ... hole for!", "You are so much better off here", and my favourite "Go back to the grey skies and raining constantly?" Strange that cos from beginning Dec 2005 till end July 2006 when we were there it was lovely and yes I love the rain, the frost, wrapping up, putting a scarf on etc!

I have learn to just shut up now and not say anything as it just gets bad comments back which I can't handle and find very upsetting. Life here isn't for everyone I understand that, so why cant they.

So glad I found this forum to Vent on otherwise I would be going nuts, well half way there, on 2 lots of tablets but at least I can laugh about it!

Its home to me and always will be.

Plants


P.S. Bramblebush your not selfish, your thinking for yourself and making decisions for your self and family, its there problem not yours!

My friend who wants to go home too was told by her so called friends that she needs to see a shrink because she must be mad to want to go home.!!!

With friends like that who needs enemies.

Stuff em'...thats all i can say. Don't let anyone twist your mind.

[QUOTE=PLANTS;4663991]

I love the rain, the frost, wrapping up, putting a scarf on etc!


After another 30 degrees.............I can not wait and know exactly where you are coming from matey!!

LibbyX