audreyrose23

Been in Canada 7 months now. Husband is Canadian so I guess it was inevitable we'd come here. We were both very enthusiastic and determined to start a life here and ready for the challenges, but we have become overcome but the constant barriers and we are tired of fighting. We are going to go home in September. From reading these posts we are fairly lucky in that my husband has a job connected to the UK and we have one salary to live off. Our savings are dwindling by the day as I haven't been able to find work and I realise that even if I found a part-time job (maybe after volunteering for a while) that it will take years to build our lives back up (and we weren't rich in England believe me!). If we go back sooner rather than later we will still have some savings left and my OH will still have a UK visa. We were totally shocked about the whole Canadian Experience thing (I wish I'd read some more forums) but having a Canadian husband and Canadian friends here who knew nothing about these barriers we didn't imagine the problems. Having lived in UK I know all about working with people from around the globe and I realise now how open the UK is in terms of looking beyond a persons culture before giving them even a modicum of responsibility. I have worked with Americans, Italians, South Africans, Kiwis, etc etc and I would never think they weren't up to the job of working in a UK position, it never crossed my mind. Since being in Canada I have started to believe that even picking up a telephone and dialing a number at work would be an immense challenge for me...if you believe the C-E hype. My self-confidence has been completely knocked. I managed to get one interview for a 2 day a week office job and the lady asked me if I could type (with over 10 years experience on my CV). It is degrading, but I realised it would be tough, but not this small minded and restrictive. Even basic admin jobs require so many qualifications, mostly diplomas. Working as a medical secretary you need 'medical terminology' and a 'medical office administration' diploma...they have diplomas for everything, possibly even a 'picking up the telephone and dialing a number diploma'. I'm not in Toronto so maybe its easier there (doubt it, plus more expensive to live). As you can see my cynicism has set in, but having made the decision to leave and giving up on the total waste of time job search which was entirely depressing and demeaning, I think I can still leave Canada with good thoughts about it. In many ways it is very lovely here and I know my family and friends back home think it must be heaven compared to the UK, but it makes you realise that the important things are being able to earn your bread and butter no matter how depressing times are. I worked through the last recession so i'm not worried about that. I think we would have kept going here, but the job thing has totally sapped our energy /positivity / blind optimism which you need to do this whole immigration thing. I am unsure how people who have no immediate connection to Canada do it, as we were already pretty familiar with life here, but not familiar enough obviously!! (My husband is also now sick of Canada, and wants to go back to UK). Anyhow I will keep reading these forums as they offer a great form of relief from the constant confusion created by trying to do this whole mad thing. ps. no regrets, except for the money arggh. So many life lessons learnt in such a short space of time.

Bevm

What a shame, but I can imagine. They do seem to want bits of paper for everything here and there are barriers to moving employment even between provinces.

Good luck for the future.

Bev

Elaine B.

Sound like my OH he's also Canadian and wouldn't want to live there again
Good luck with your moving back plans

Bsidebaby

yes i hear you we are the same well for me i am totally lacking in confidence since coming to Canada and finding no hope on the job front. I am degree educated with nearly 20 years work history behind me in the UK and I am stuck working in a part time retail job - yes some would say lucky to have a job but when i had to prove education and work history to even get into this country it smacks of cynicism when you cant even use that when you get here to get a good job!

Maddening, self destructive fills you with self doubt and yes we have had to rely on uk credit cards to get through tough times!- when money has been short.

I want to return too and my husband feels the same way but we worry about going back to a country going downhill fast?!

Its so hard to know what to do for the best but at least we have family in the UK and there do still seem to be an abundance of jobs much more so than here - looking at job websites etc.

audreyrose23

The difficulty with deciding to go home is that friends and family I have spoken to in the UK are urging us to stay, due to the economic climate there (also they don't believe I can't get a job and it is hard to explain things without souding like you're not trying hard enough or being overly negative). But their opinion is based on Canada being some fantasy land of wealth and plenty. Also when you base it on holiday experiences it is not reality. I have had to adjust my thinking about the country as my experience also was based on vacation time which was a pretty great escape from the UK. However, on a longterm basis we both feel we don't identify with the Canadian life and feel very 'european' in outlook. Canada is great because it is so far away from anywhere that you can really escape a lot of the world's harsh realities..you do feel more relaxed and the media is not as intense as in the UK (I blame the negative media for a lot of the dispondency in the UK). But on a longterm basis this 'distance' becomes rather isolating and numbing. I really feel that i'd like to be back in the 'thick of things' even in a depressing UK. I guess overal I just want my life back, as I was independent, working full time, taking vacations, having friends and family to talk to...it is a complete void here. I will take the rough of England to get those things back! I think each person immigration experience is unique, and I guess that an important factor is actually wanting to be a Canadian 100%. I have realised that I can't give up on a lot of things that make me British for all its quirks (in fact I miss the quirks) and my husband, who is Canadian identifies more with his life and friends in UK. So be it!!! ps. thanks for the supportive comments, this forum has been so helpful, especially as you can't really explain things to a person who hasn't lived this experience. My family have put their heads in the sand completely and are in denial that we are returning. This is hard to take. Hopefully they will adjust..I guess they will miss the holidays (although I notice no one wants to come out in the winter)

Marmalade

I'm so sorry to hear that you could not find work in Canada, it must be very demoralizing. Especially since you sound very qualified.

I can definitely relate to the family bit, where your family puts their head in the sand about you wanting to move back home! They do love visiting, but I had a nasty row with my mother at Christmas (when I went home to Scotland to visit as I do every year). Well actually, it was her yelling at me!!! It was all about her wanting to come visit the US this summer, but she knew I wanted to move back to Scotland before then. I was so mad as all she seemed to care about was the holiday and not me:curse:.............Family, what can you do with them, eh

I wish you the very best of luck with your move home, and hope that your family appreciates what you have been through.

R2D2 returns

The way we looked at it was............This economic downturn could well be global and Canada is sure to be affected aswell, so wouldn't we rather be at home, surrounded by family, should things get 'tricky', rather than feel isolated and struggling in a place that doesn't give us the warm feeling of home.

We felt, if house prices dropped through the floor in Alberta, and we became financially trapped there, how would we feel.

sans

We came back from Canada in June....We pretty much had the same reasons, with afew extra.

We too had so much enthusiasm to start with, even after the 4 yr wait we had to get in on skilled worker....

We returned after coming to the realization that it was not going to get any better...too many restrictions put in our way and money disappearing fast We was so miserable out there and that wasn't suppose to be how it was. Sorta defeats the reasons for going in the first place if your worse off/miserable and struggling...

So here we are back where we started, with one very big difference.....We now know which side our breads buttered and are loving being home.

The Uk has been through many recessions and we always come out smiling in the end. I lived in Canada as a teen in the 70's and their was a recession on then.....And believe me if you think its bad out their now, wait till this one kicks in.
At least in the UK you can pick up part-time jobs to make the bill payments...You couldn't even pull a pint in Canada without paying to go on a course first. for a piece of paper to say you learned how to pull a pint lols
Which is kinda bazaar when you think as british born we are brought up in or around pubs

JAJ

Were there other options, eg Australia?

One thing you should know is that if you are a permanent resident of Canada, you should (under current law) be able to keep your status indefinitely as long as you are accompanying your Canadian citizen spouse.

Does your husband have Indefinite Leave to Remain in Britain? If so, does he plan to become a British citizen as soon as he can when he returns?

audreyrose23

No, no other options other than Canada. We lived in UK together for 7 years before coming out here and my husband has 'indefinite leave to remain' but we never got around to getting citizenship. I realise this was a bit dumb in hindsight and we tried to sort it out before we left the country, but we didn't then have enough time what with the life in britain test, and the cost. I expect once we're back we will get him a passport once we can. Quite frankly I think we are keen just to settle down now and have a quiet life. Being married to someone from another country has kept us in a weird complex state for so long. So many visa applications and paperwork along the way (x3 so far)..I'm sure others can relate. Your relationship sometimes feels like the property of the government of the country you're in due to constantly having to prove you exist, your relationship exists, you have jobs, you pay bills, have money, etc. For the last 7 years I have kept every single bill, important document, bank statement, etc as I always know along the line we will have to send it off for someones approval. We had hoped that moving to Canada would be the settling down bit, but we think not now. However, we now know that we won't have that 'what if' floating in our heads anymore. We had to try it to see where we wanted to be.

buggalugs

Hi
Just wanted to say "I hear ya" You need a "ticket" as they call it here in Canada for pretty much everthing. It doesnt matter if you have had oodles of practical experience....this ticks me off as you can have someone with the "ticket" who gets the job even though they have just come out of college and have never done the job before. I have been looking into taking a medical office assistants course and, as you say, you need many hours of medical terminology plus other things.. I understand you need training but it seems to be way more difficult here.....I have found only ONE college that will train in the evenings nearly all of them want you to attend college full time, I cant do this as I have a mortgage and bills to pay like everyone else. In the UK there are so many more ways to better yourself without compromising your current employment. I am awaiting my citizenship, then its serious talk time for us. Like you ( and I have posted on this before) the response I get from the people in the UK is they think we are bonkers, mad, crazy etc... to even THINK about going back, we have been here for over 13years and I suppose they cant understand why we would want to go back after all this time. I am proud of how my husband and I have made it work here, we knew no-one at all, now he owns his own Barber shop and I work full time, we own our home and "stuff" but it always feels like something is missing. BTW OH had to take TWO hairdressing exams here even though he had his diplomas and tons of experience owning and running salons in UK. We lived for a short time in Ontario and took his exam there where they told jhim it was an Interprovincial diploma good for everywhere in Canada. WRONG.....as soon as we arrived in Victoria BC he wasnt allowed to pratice until he had taken the BC licence! More money for the government I suppose but very frustrating.
Rant over.....I understand perfectly how you feel and think its a good thing you are going back sooner rather than later.....its gets harder the later you leave it. GOOD LUCK

audreyrose23

Hi there, thanks for the insights into the future! I guess what frustrates me is this 'ticket' mentality as you refer to it. Like you, when we arrived I did consider doing a Medical Terminology course at the local college..the local college here (Hamilton) spews out people regularly with Medical Admin diploma, Office Admin diploma, Business admin diploma etc. I was considering medical transcription (was still energetic and positive at the time!)...but really it seems like more money going into someone's pocket and i'd still be competing with Canadians after gaining the certificate. Job ad's here are so specific, they want you to already know software before you're even in the company. In my experience I have always learned on the job. I look at UK job ads now and see how flexible and open they are in comparison. When you look at the list of skills wanted for even bog standard jobs its enough to give anyone total anxiety over their abilities. I guess this then throws up the question, how high are you prepared to jump and will the bar keep being raised until you collapse in a defeated heap! Um, yes, that's me!

audreyrose23

ps. I think you should be v.v.v.v.v.v.proud of yourself and husband to have made a life here. Knowing the challenges we have faced in only a short time here, I think you have shown incredible tenancity and resourcefulness. I think anything else you do in life would seem a breeze!!!

englishinfl

Good luck with your return. I'd say that even if your friends and family are saying it's not the best time to go back to the UK, at least it would be better than being in a place that you didn't want to be in, and losing the money while you are there.
Things will turn around in the UK, even if it's tight there right now.

Bevm

Well quite. Don't let the doom-mongers get to you. And don't think Canada's not heading in the same direction with, IMO, much worse ability to deal with it. You don't say how your husband's job situation is, but are you likely to be worse off back there?

Life's short. Why stick around in the dismals?

My philosophy for the day.

Bev