Genie3

Well I've done it.
I have booked and leave Sunday. The packers came yesterday...they were fantastic!! NZ Van Lines out of the Nelson branch, great bunch. I will today sort out the enrolment forms for my daughter to continue her NCEA with the correspondence school and alongside that she will (hopefully) do GCSE, covering all bases I guess you could say. My parents have now told me they will accept my cat for the period we will stay there (eek!) so am running around lost and headless chicken style trying to sort things Yes I know he is just a cat but I feel I need him after leaving my dog in the UK before.
I still deep down don't want to go, I just kinda feel it's happening to me, so many little things in life of late have led me to this point and that's all that can happen. But my heart belongs here and once I have sold myself to pay back the money involved in this I will "ping pong" as so many others have!!
I have to come back, my youngest daughter wants to do Uni here, everything is here......my son is here, and maybe one day, after the crap he has been fed fades, he will want to be in my life again.
I take back to England a very broken and extremely sad person.

(sorry )

windsong

Don't go. Do you really have to go? If your heart is not there, why do it?

Sally Redux

Agreed. Don't do it.

Genie3

But I have lost everything, life has fallen apart and it seems the only answer.
I have no choice.
Sorry, everyone hates a downer.

I think I need to do this, lots....

Sally Redux

BEVS

Hi Genie.

Things haven't gotten much better by the sounds of it then.

I'm also not sure why you are returning to the UK. It seems like a tough decision if your heart and much of your family is here in NZ.

brits1

Life is hard at times for most people, I have found those who cope better with their situation have at the very least something that makes them happy, being somewhere you really don't want to be is not going to help to much. Its NEVER to late to change your mind and if I felt like you do about not wanting to leave I would turn over "every stone" I could to stay. Good luck either way, I really hope you find some peace.

lgabriel73

if your heart is not truly in it then I worry that you will not settle into the UK and find the happiness you truly want. You have to want to be somewhere to be able to deal with the struggles you will face otherwise they can swallow you up. I agree with other that if you truly don't want to go then don't, but obviously I don't know your circumstances are and if staying put is an option. If you do go I wish you all the success in the world and hope that things work out for the best for you.

spouse of scouse

Just wanted to wish you a safe journey and good luck, Genie. All we can do is make the best decision we can at any given time. It's great that you realize that you don't need to be in the UK forever, that you can return to NZ down the track if you want to.

If you're going to sell yourself though, make sure you get a good price

Take care and cheers love.

morayeel

Read many of the posts as I am always in a turmoil of weather to stay or go..I wish you all the best..

quoll

Oh my! I'd add my voice to the "don't go!" crowd if you don't want to! You will hate it, resent it and it won't work because you won't be prepared to put your energy into making it work because you will be planning your leaving again. I do hope you aren't being blackmailed into it by the Mafia outlaws!

There must be local resources to help you stay - have you checked with your local Women's support services? Friends? Would your folk be prepared to support from a distance?

I really wish you all the best with the next step in your life adventure! Look after yourself!

NiHao

Genie3,

I'm so sorry that you are feeling so sad about moving to the UK. I followed your other post when you were trying to decide and I don't think I really understand what has led you to this decision (no need to explain I'm sure some of it is very private). However, if you really feel that you have to go for whatever reasons, then I think your best chance of not having a completely miserable time is to try and reframe it in your mind. You say it will only be for a short period of time so try to focus on the positive aspects knowing its not forever.

It would also be really good to go on the wait list with your UK dr to see a therapist. If you aren't depressed already then you are almost bound to end up in depression if you don't have some help. You need someone to talk over all you have been going through and a good therapist will help tremendously.

Good luck with everything, sometimes its darkest just before the sun comes out!

Genie3

You were all right, I shouldn't of done this.
What a mess

Perth

Oh no Please share with us whatever you are willing to. A big virtual (((HUG))) to you.

windsong

I am so sorry. I know you had hesitations before you left. Is there a way you can make plans to go back? At least if you begin to plan, there would be an end in sight eventually.