Mate you go where you will be happier! And no there isn't anything wrong with you, it's just how Australia is in reality. I am seriously thinking of moving to the UK and haven't lived there since late 80's, no 'habitual residence' status, so would have to hope I land some work pretty quickly upon landing. maybe London initially?

Most of what you have said pretty much sums it up for me as well.

Socially we're dead in the water here. I'm in my thirties and I feel like I've retired!

I had a great job here as a bookkeeper but it turned into a monster i.e. I got paid $20.00 an hour to do an accountants job!

As for going to bed early, I'm knackered by 8.30 pm. Why is that?
Is it because:-
a) Aus telly is uninspiring/dead loss/a load of old bollocks.
b) The heat of the day takes it out of you.
c) No daylight saving so it's dark early and your body clock says it's time
for bed
d) however U.K. wintertime it's dark by 4.00 p.m. in the afternoon
but then there's a lot to see on the telly....
e) and oh you had a social life i.e. friends/family who would pop round or vice
versa or would phone you or you'd be out on the town for a meal with
one of your numerous girlfriends or perhaps catch a movie or you'd
have people round for a meal or even better, you'd have a meal at theirs.

Movies - this leads me to my next point i.e. we seem to spend a great deal of our time at the cinema here - something we did very rarely in the U.K.
I suppose my reasons are as follows:-
a) It's too hot to be outdoors (4-5 months of the year)
b) Bored of driving miles to get anywhere i.e an hour and a half to the beach
and other places every weekend
c) No friends/family to visit or visit you
d) An outing/weekend focus thing/something to look forward to

And another thing - We can't seem to save any dosh here and we don't have a mortgage - hubby is a principle civil engineer so earns what is deemed a top salary and I bring in a little over $1000.00 a month with my part time job.

We get screwed with tax on our investments that we have back in the U.K. which is classed as income i.e. we pay something like 22 % tax in the U.K. but then we have to bring it up to 50% tax which is the Aussie tax which means we pay the bloody Australian government 30% tax! It's a blinking scam!

Dare I say it but jeez I feel that we've turned into really sad people. I am truly bored living (dying) here.

Having said all this, the lifestyle insofar as having a nice house with garden, pool, neighbourhood, tropical birdlife etc is incomparabley better than the U.K. but for us it is so lacking in the 'essentials'. I think for me Australia is a wonderful place to travel but I refuse to live without 'the essentials' for the rest of my life.

Gosh I hadn't mean't to come out with all of that and I've really worked myself up into a frenzy, maybe I'll feel better now.

I'd better go and calm down before I say something I shouldn't
hmm a glass of red perhaps Anyone care to join me?

Agree with all that!! Pour me a glass!! I used to go to the cinema about twice a year a home because I was busy doing so much else, here I go nearly every week........somewhere to escape to a while away a few hours, I've know seen 'Walk The Line' twice, not because I'm into country & western music, I'm in my 30s as well so never got into that, but only because there was nothing else worth watching!!! My mates in the UK were laughing, worried I'll be greeting them at the airport wearing cowboy boots and line dancing!!! Got to say though, for those who haven't seen it it is a good film!

I so much agree with this post, I just thought it was Perth that was like this! Perhaps it's the whole damned country?

Common thing here, most ppl seem to be in their 30's

is it me, pass me another beer while i wait for reply

I was really intrigued by your post Di ... so (sad bastard that I am) I did a bit of digging and read many of your posts over the years, starting from when you were getting your visa, through the move, to settling in and now the discontent and desire to move back to the UK. It was an interesting trip - forgive me for disturbing the dust on these posts.

For starters you found yourself getting attack by people like PB and Dotty and responded like many setting out on the road...
"I take offence to being referred to as a refugee, an idiot, a dreamer with rose tinted glasses etc. etc.. I like most on this forum am very interested in hearing the negatives with the positives." Hard to argue with that - I totally agree.

Then we get into things like "We are really pleased with the house we've bought and the area of Bellbowrie that we live in is beautiful. our boys aged 8 and 12 are at the local School and love it. The teachers are very approachable and the standard of education here is excellent. There is a lot going on in the area what with the local shopping centre which has markets twice a month, swimming club, cricket, football etc." That was a nice upbeat post a month in.

Six months in and you say things like "Naturally after only 5 months neither of us is very settled as yet but we do feel we're getting there. We've met some terrific people some of whom are from this forum and we very recently joined a rugby union club," and this "So it ain't perfect but what is?" and slightly further down, this: "If you don't have unreasonable expectations then you won't be disappointed."

By early 2004 you're saying this "We also left a rich circle of friends behind and very close family and it was very difficult. I think also when you first arrive it's all naturally very exciting and there's a lot to see and money to spend but once these things are out of the way your coping strategy dissolves and it all becomes a bit of a reality." Seems to be a common strand in many posts - missing the old friends and family network back in the UK.

Then it all goes very quiet for nearly two years as you live your lives and have no need for BE ... then in January 06 you start posting again and decide that: "I think I know deep down that what I really want is to return to the U.K. and grow old with people that I really care about."

Besides the recurrent theme about squash clubs, the social side of which seem to be very important to you and your husband, I was just curious about the process that got you from A to Z. You've said there's so much you love about Oz, but you appear to be suffering badly from the lack of a social circle. I just wondered whether you'd considered trying another area of Australia - not sure of the practicalities of that for you and your family - or if you've just had enough and want to head back to the UK.

im mid forties and ive been bored for 15 years ive sold the house im out of here i got a lot of catcing up to do. I think to be honest every one that comes here goes through a process ,initial excitement of arrival and apprehension and we shift in to over drive to get our lives normal again ie in ahouse ,kids at school then we sit back and think well we have achieved the australian dream what is next on the agenda ,then we start to reflect and miss our friends etc etc etc and this prevents us moving forward and embracing the australian way of life [whatever that is ]and becoming true blue dinky di's.I have tried it for years and havent succeeded but i have enjoyed the time here somtimes but in reality as often said same shite different bucket ,and someone stated getting the visa is the easy bit how true that is .I admire you goldcoast for being honest to a certain degree as you havent changed your username and as said all ready people can look back on your post and see the steady decline into homesickness it is a valuble lesson for all those coming here as i think the failure rate is 30 % and thats quite high i reckon and a hell of a risk cosidereing somtimes it may even take years for someone to actually pluck up the courage to go home add on top of that the whole visa application process and your not looking at a small amount of time .

This is such an interesting post for me. We are only just deciding whether to set off for Oz or not. It's not like we hate living here in the UK,there are things we like and dislike and I'm sure that would be the same wherever you live the world over. The only negative I really have about making the move is missing our families.

I've been reading in this forum to see why people decide to return etc and to make sure I've thought of everything before we make a decision to go, but it seems to me that everyone must have thought long and hard before setting off in the first place and you're never going to know if it's for you unless you try it. Would any of you agree with that? I'm trying desperately hard not to wear rose-tinted glasses and have heard plenty of cons as well as some pros about moving to Oz but I'm just thinking now that unless we try we'll spend forever wondering? Do any of you regret trying?

my prognosis-you are one of the many people that come on this forum and fail to understand one thing about Australia-the divide between Sydney/Melbourne and everywhere else.
A good portion of residents of Sydney and Melbourne would never ever live anywhere else for all the reasons you stated

You must feel like you really know me - I am impressed that you took the time to read my previous posts.

If I am truthful I admit to being the one who engineered our move to Australia despite hubby being quite happy to stay put. I got a bit fed up with dare I say it, the weather, the traffic, the lack of space, the struggle of living and trying to achieve a better lifestyle/better house in a nice area. I suppose for me the last straw was when we visited South Africa for 3 weeks and returned to the U.K. in that November 2002 (dark and gloomy). We had a wonderful trip to S.A. (holiday mode) but arriving back in England was so deppressing, it took me a month to unpack our suitcases. That seemed to be one of the reasons which kickstarted me into the immigration process.

You're right, we do feel starved socially and we are very sociable people and I miss my friends 100 %.

I am not sure whether I have the energy or the inclination to start again in another state and I do agree that we 'might' have been better off elsewhere in Oz, whose to say. I am surprised at how much I do miss things about the U.K. and I think that it's only when you're away from a place that you can be objective and appreciate the differences. I suppose there is a hint of the grass is greener but I know the reality of living in the U.K. so I don't think I'm returning under the illussion of 'rose tinted specs'. My reasons for returning are genuine and we will have made progress in that we are buying a 'detatched' house in a nice but familiar area. I hated living in a semi on a busy road. This I think will make a difference and perhaps prozac in the winter months.

Now that we have made the decision to return to the U.K. the 'hell' of indecisiveness is over but then it's easy to fall into a false sense of security which in turn makes you wonder if you're doing the right thing. My gut says I am doing the right thing.

If you have always longed to live 'somewhere else' then I strongly recommend you go for it otherwise you will never know. My fear was that when I got to 70 years of age I would feel this deep sense of regret if I didn't take the opportunity to 'try it' while I was still young enough. Unfortunately or fortunately it didn't pan out the way we wanted it to but we achieved our citizenship and boy what an experience.

It's been a great lifeskill education for all of us as a family and I can't believe that we haven't come thru the otherside richer for it. I shall miss Australia and it does hurt in the middle of my stomach when I think about that.

Thanks for your interest Hutch - feel quite flattered I think I hope I have shed some light. Your post was rather thought provoking.

Well that is one movie I haven't seen so will add this to my tremendously loonnggg list of 'things to do' and go and see it this weekend.

I don't think the cowboy look is a bad one but I'd do everything in my power to avoid the line dancing

I never thought that when I started out on the road to emigration to Australia, that a couple of years later I'd be looking and posting on the return to UK forum. But 2 years ago I didn't have my little boy, and so the entirety of our decision to come here was based on what we thought was best for us alone, and what we wanted to get out of life.

When we moved here, my little boy was still a baby, and didn't have the ability to show any emotion about the move. Now he is 2.5 and it is so clear to see how much he misses his grandparents.

He has seen them in person 4 times since we moved here, the rest of the time via the webcam and the telephone. We were fortunate that we could afford to go back and visit them before he was 2 years old, but now that he is and we are faced with the purchase of 3 flights instead of 2, (and we are thinking of expanding the family with another baby), it simply won't be possible to go back so frequently. So our decision to move back is now based on what is best for our son rather than ourselves - if we didn't have him we would probably stay.

It is funny reading back on your own posts to see how your own opinions have changed!

[QUOTE=goldcoastblue]
Maybe I have become a boring fart coming here, but the guys i work with dont do anything at all, all between 35 and 50, they have nothing to say, on a monday, yet i go to surfers and it seems busy enough... I have rarely met any outgoing people here, i think all the jetski's are remote controlled with manequins on them, and the big boats, are carboard cut outs, and australia ia big NASA project like the trumann show.... but with utes and scruffy dogs.

I would love to offer some expert advice but am too busy p*ssing myself with laughter at your comments above. So true, so true. You belong in the UK, where people can have a proper laugh. Am headed back for the same reasons.
If you end up in London, let me know and I'll buy you a pint mate.

SUZ

[QUOTE=blowers]
OK, I have to ask, as I see so many comments in various threads, about the "early bedtime" or "boring fart" aspect of Oz (by the way, I live in the US and also go to bed by 10 p.m.):

While all of the trendy 35-50 year olds in the UK are supposedly out at the pub p*ssing it up and being "exciting", WHO THE HECK IS TAKING CARE OF THE KIDS??????????

[QUOTE=dunroving]
They're in the pub, snoozing in the baby carrier under the table.