British Expats

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-   Moving back or to the UK (https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/)
-   -   The Final Rant (https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/final-rant-531882/)

Skyblue67 Apr 27th 2008 11:17 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by saveme (Post 6274692)
How did a country so backward, stuck in the past, full of country bumpkins as the Aussies manage to put together an advertising campaign that fooled so many super intelligent, 21st century sophisticates?

On the other hand I suppose they would argue that an 80 per cent success rate is a pretty good average.

Maybe its easier to fix PR than it is to fix the real life version.

starsun Feb 14th 2009 2:08 am

Re: The Final Rant
 
Oh dear! I just read this post about my home town - Perth. Now I am all for pointing out Perth's faults and having lived there for 26 years before moving abroad and having lived away now for 5 years, I believe I am in a good position to comment in an unbiased manner. Since leaving Perth I have lived in New York, Washington DC, Sydney and now Moscow. But I guess I am still one of Perth's uneducated, unwordly, untravelled racist idiots right? Despite my Masters in International Law from one of the top law schools in the US? Yeah, all people from Perth are living in the 80's. My wardrobe is completely all from the 80s, absolutely. I have no fashion sense at all. Either do any of my friends who are from Perth and either still live there or live in London, Paris, Sydney or other parts of the world. Yep, we are all just unfashionable uneducated idiots.

You know what the funniest thing is - all the top law firms from the UK come over and try and recruit us to come and work for them. And then pay us lots of money to move over and do so. Guess they don't think we are all idiots.

I am well aware of Perth's flaws - the trading hours, the isolation, the small-town mentality, the god-awful suburbs. But there are some very very smart, cool people who live in Perth and there are some great suburbs, great restaurants and great cafes, if you know where to go. And I am sorry - the beaches are amazing. There is no denying that.

So obviously this guy has left Perth and I hope he is happy back in the UK - but if you are going to criticise, at least be balanced about it. I love having fish and chips down at Fremantle - on the water. I do it every time I am back. And having breakfast down at Cottesloe - also fantasic. Margaret River - gorgeous wineries, gorgeous beaches.

So knock Perth all you like - but lots of people love it, are happy there and it gave me everything I could hope for as a child growing up there. The universities are excellent (despite your claim people are uneducated idiots) and there are great companies there, offering excellent work opportunities.

I just couldn't let this post sit, without someone coming to Perth's defence.

:cool:

Tr1boy Feb 14th 2009 2:29 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Yep, we are all just unfashionable uneducated idiots.
Pretty much, but I wouldn't restrict it to Perth.


You know what the funniest thing is - all the top law firms from the UK come over and try and recruit us to come and work for them. And then pay us lots of money to move over and do so.

Only because we don't like cleaning toilets and parking other people's cars.:cool:

stm1971 Feb 14th 2009 11:07 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by starsun (Post 7284802)
Oh dear! I just read this post about my home town - Perth. Now I am all for pointing out Perth's faults and having lived there for 26 years before moving abroad and having lived away now for 5 years, I believe I am in a good position to comment in an unbiased manner. Since leaving Perth I have lived in New York, Washington DC, Sydney and now Moscow. But I guess I am still one of Perth's uneducated, unwordly, untravelled racist idiots right? Despite my Masters in International Law from one of the top law schools in the US? Yeah, all people from Perth are living in the 80's. My wardrobe is completely all from the 80s, absolutely. I have no fashion sense at all. Either do any of my friends who are from Perth and either still live there or live in London, Paris, Sydney or other parts of the world. Yep, we are all just unfashionable uneducated idiots.

You know what the funniest thing is - all the top law firms from the UK come over and try and recruit us to come and work for them. And then pay us lots of money to move over and do so. Guess they don't think we are all idiots.

I am well aware of Perth's flaws - the trading hours, the isolation, the small-town mentality, the god-awful suburbs. But there are some very very smart, cool people who live in Perth and there are some great suburbs, great restaurants and great cafes, if you know where to go. And I am sorry - the beaches are amazing. There is no denying that.

So obviously this guy has left Perth and I hope he is happy back in the UK - but if you are going to criticise, at least be balanced about it. I love having fish and chips down at Fremantle - on the water. I do it every time I am back. And having breakfast down at Cottesloe - also fantasic. Margaret River - gorgeous wineries, gorgeous beaches.

So knock Perth all you like - but lots of people love it, are happy there and it gave me everything I could hope for as a child growing up there. The universities are excellent (despite your claim people are uneducated idiots) and there are great companies there, offering excellent work opportunities.

I just couldn't let this post sit, without someone coming to Perth's defence.

:cool:

So, when are you coming back to live then?? ;)

starsun Feb 15th 2009 12:11 am

Re: The Final Rant
 
I will be moving back when I am good and ready, but thanks for asking.

Look I am well aware of Perth's flaws and I am prepared to criticise it for these things, but when you classify the whole population of a city, and a country for that matter, as uneducated and unfashionable, I can only assume it is tongue in cheek.

Do you ever stop to consider that perhaps you don't like Australia because you are living in crappy suburbs or you don't know the good places to go, rather than that the whole city is shit.

I have lived in some great cities, and each city has it positives and negatives, and Perth has both. But plenty of people love it so I am quite sure not all of them can be complete idiots.

Maybe you need just to get out a bit and find the good places. I'm just saying....

camponotus Feb 15th 2009 2:26 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by Jumbo_Celcius (Post 6260001)
Did anyone watch the recent BBC series "Life On Mars"?
"My name is Jumbo Celcius. I fell asleep on a plane and woke up in 1973. Was I mad, or in a coma or just in Perth?


Well folks, below is my final rant on Perth, please read the disclaimer first

Disclaimer:
The information below is provided as a guide only and may not be used (TraceyW, I'm looking at you!) or disclosed except for the purpose for which it has been posted.
Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, or to actual events is completely intended.......so sue me.
If you feel that you have been offended by any of this, then go call the Samaritans 'cos you won't get any sympathy here.

Come to Perth they said, it's beautiful and the lifestyle is fantastic, it has Australias best beaches (lies), the cost of living's cheaper (more lies), lovely cafe strips (supreme lies), plenty of nightlife (this is just getting completey ridiculous lies, bordering on delusional).

So I packed up my things, waved goodbye to the homeland and set off on the long haul to the planets bottom (literally).

Subiaco - where do I start - I'll tell you where you start. Head West out of the CBD along Hay St, when the building numbers reset to 1, you're in "Subi".
Cool, trendy Subi with it's "cosmopolitan cappuccino strip" and "fashionable boutiques". Were the tourist board smoking crack when they wrote this?
Watch out Paris, Subi is taking over. The Parisians would have a word for "Subi"........that word is "merde".
And now they're going to knock down two of the reasons I used to even bother going there (The Lords Sport centre and the "cinema") to build more sh!tty overpriced cardboard box flats so that those shallow idiots can buy one and say they live in "Subi".

Fremantle - See the bit above about "cosmopolitan cappuccino strip" it's like "Subi" but on the water. Try the "famous fish & chips" at the harbour....famous for being over priced crap. While you eat them you can gaze upon the pen!s extensions in the harbour.

Leederville - "Subi" wanna be, and if that's what it's aspiring to be I'm not even gonna waste my time writing about it.

Joondalup - There's passport control at the start of Grand Boulevard - if you don't have a British one you're not allowed in.

Rockingham - I felt like I needed a shower when I left there and there's been enough previous post about this already.

Mandurah - Did anyone go to the Crab Fest? What a complete and utter over rated steaming pile of cow's shee-ite.

Perth In General:
I have never had so many people trying to rip me off since I was in Nigeria, in a final insult, that fcuckers at Optus charged me a $170 disconnection fee for my phone!! Also pretending to be friendly when they're trying to screw you over, "don't call me mate, I'm not ur ****ing mate, if you don't stop patronising me we are going to become mortal enemies".

People getting annoyed when you tell them you're leaving and calling the UK a sh!thole. "The lifestyle" they cry in unison in an almost brainwashed like fashion. Trying to convince you that leaving a perfectly happy
life for less money, a worse house, more expensive, lower quality food and clothes in a isolated hick town will make you happy. I seriously fell out with one person over this before leaving and nearly lost if with a few more. My "leaving night" was hell, everybody went on the whole night about how I was making a mistake and "how could you not love this", another thing, why do people always hold their hands up gesturing at the surroundings when saying
"Look at it, how could you not love this".
All I see is tacky, dated buildings and graffitti, "Look at the weather though" they say.....screw the unbearable heat, Afghanistan is sunny, do you want to move there?
"Rachim, why do you want to go to the UK, it's a sh!thole, look at it here <holding arms up>, it's sunny!"

The abbreviations and slang they use..bikie, workie, garbo, servo, using it in the media and on the news too, could you imagine Trevor McDonald saying the some famous person was unable to attend an event because he's "crook"!!

Abo's asking for money all the time. Yes, they did get ****ed over but if they had their head screwed on they could seriously push for land & mineral rights etc and make some cash, then I could start asking them for $5 since they say it's their country therefore that's who I'm asking for a refund from.

Australia Day - I particularly liked it when they flew the big swastika...whoops, sorry I mean FLAG over the river from a helicoptor before the fireworks. I'm surprised there wasn't an announcement ordering everyone to bow in front of it!!

Over rated, over priced, over hyped restaurants. Every dish is "famous" when it's just a cheap, lower quality imitation from somewhere else in the world.

Kangaroos, at first I thought they were cool, after a while I just look at them hopping around and think, **** sake why are you jumping around in this heat, take a gentle stroll instead, it's not as if you're in a rush to get anywhere!!

In summary, it's the most socially & culturally backward, boring, over hyped dump with tacky buildings, grafitti and false internationally unaware racist idiots on the planet and all the sunshine and beaches in the world isn't going to make a difference


Thank you and goodnight.

Jimbo - Pioneer of truth and citizen of the world.


Wooah! Very brave of you to post your thoughts so honestly!

I can sympathise with your feeling of having been lied to. Someone on another thread said that I was obviously of the belief that I'd been sort of 'duped' into coming to Australia, and they were right, I do feel like that a lot of the time.

I genuinely cannot see what it is that everyone thinks is so bloody fantastic about Australia (Melbourne in my case). I get told (still) that it's way, way cheaper here - but if that's the case how come I'm not able to afford any more than I could in the UK on the same money? People say the food is better - that's just nonsense. People say the quality of service (restaurants etc) here is better - but it's absolutely no different, and if anything is slightly worse here cos the Aussies don't care about being polite as much as Brits tend to do. They confuse being brusque and rude with being upfront and honest. The beaches here are okay but not world-beaters by any stretch of the imagination. People say that England's dirty (chewing-gum on pavements) but I see so much litter strewn around here and spilt milkshakes trickling down the footpath - what exactly is the difference?

I think it's become this urban legend that everyone is convinced is true. Australia = great, UK = not great. That's the thinking everyone is locked in and it actually takes a real independent thinker to be able to step outside that and see that it's a load of bloody nonsense.

I'm not saying Melbourne/Australia is crap. I don't hate it. But do I love it? Do I think it's the best place on Earth bar none? Am I glad that I left the UK for here? Do I believe my life is better here?

No bloody way.

DunRoaminTheUK Feb 15th 2009 3:39 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by Jumbo_Celcius (Post 6260001)
Did anyone watch the recent BBC series "Life On Mars"?
"My name is Jumbo Celcius. I fell asleep on a plane and woke up in 1973. Was I mad, or in a coma or just in Perth?


Well folks, below is my final rant on Perth, please read the disclaimer first

Disclaimer:
The information below is provided as a guide only and may not be used (TraceyW, I'm looking at you!) or disclosed except for the purpose for which it has been posted.
Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, or to actual events is completely intended.......so sue me.
If you feel that you have been offended by any of this, then go call the Samaritans 'cos you won't get any sympathy here.

Come to Perth they said, it's beautiful and the lifestyle is fantastic, it has Australias best beaches (lies), the cost of living's cheaper (more lies), lovely cafe strips (supreme lies), plenty of nightlife (this is just getting completey ridiculous lies, bordering on delusional).

So I packed up my things, waved goodbye to the homeland and set off on the long haul to the planets bottom (literally).

Subiaco - where do I start - I'll tell you where you start. Head West out of the CBD along Hay St, when the building numbers reset to 1, you're in "Subi".
Cool, trendy Subi with it's "cosmopolitan cappuccino strip" and "fashionable boutiques". Were the tourist board smoking crack when they wrote this?
Watch out Paris, Subi is taking over. The Parisians would have a word for "Subi"........that word is "merde".
And now they're going to knock down two of the reasons I used to even bother going there (The Lords Sport centre and the "cinema") to build more sh!tty overpriced cardboard box flats so that those shallow idiots can buy one and say they live in "Subi".

Fremantle - See the bit above about "cosmopolitan cappuccino strip" it's like "Subi" but on the water. Try the "famous fish & chips" at the harbour....famous for being over priced crap. While you eat them you can gaze upon the pen!s extensions in the harbour.

Leederville - "Subi" wanna be, and if that's what it's aspiring to be I'm not even gonna waste my time writing about it.

Joondalup - There's passport control at the start of Grand Boulevard - if you don't have a British one you're not allowed in.

Rockingham - I felt like I needed a shower when I left there and there's been enough previous post about this already.

Mandurah - Did anyone go to the Crab Fest? What a complete and utter over rated steaming pile of cow's shee-ite.

Perth In General:
I have never had so many people trying to rip me off since I was in Nigeria, in a final insult, that fcuckers at Optus charged me a $170 disconnection fee for my phone!! Also pretending to be friendly when they're trying to screw you over, "don't call me mate, I'm not ur ****ing mate, if you don't stop patronising me we are going to become mortal enemies".

People getting annoyed when you tell them you're leaving and calling the UK a sh!thole. "The lifestyle" they cry in unison in an almost brainwashed like fashion. Trying to convince you that leaving a perfectly happy
life for less money, a worse house, more expensive, lower quality food and clothes in a isolated hick town will make you happy. I seriously fell out with one person over this before leaving and nearly lost if with a few more. My "leaving night" was hell, everybody went on the whole night about how I was making a mistake and "how could you not love this", another thing, why do people always hold their hands up gesturing at the surroundings when saying
"Look at it, how could you not love this".
All I see is tacky, dated buildings and graffitti, "Look at the weather though" they say.....screw the unbearable heat, Afghanistan is sunny, do you want to move there?
"Rachim, why do you want to go to the UK, it's a sh!thole, look at it here <holding arms up>, it's sunny!"

The abbreviations and slang they use..bikie, workie, garbo, servo, using it in the media and on the news too, could you imagine Trevor McDonald saying the some famous person was unable to attend an event because he's "crook"!!

Abo's asking for money all the time. Yes, they did get ****ed over but if they had their head screwed on they could seriously push for land & mineral rights etc and make some cash, then I could start asking them for $5 since they say it's their country therefore that's who I'm asking for a refund from.

Australia Day - I particularly liked it when they flew the big swastika...whoops, sorry I mean FLAG over the river from a helicoptor before the fireworks. I'm surprised there wasn't an announcement ordering everyone to bow in front of it!!

Over rated, over priced, over hyped restaurants. Every dish is "famous" when it's just a cheap, lower quality imitation from somewhere else in the world.

Kangaroos, at first I thought they were cool, after a while I just look at them hopping around and think, **** sake why are you jumping around in this heat, take a gentle stroll instead, it's not as if you're in a rush to get anywhere!!

In summary, it's the most socially & culturally backward, boring, over hyped dump with tacky buildings, grafitti and false internationally unaware racist idiots on the planet and all the sunshine and beaches in the world isn't going to make a difference


Thank you and goodnight.

Jimbo - Pioneer of truth and citizen of the world.

You sound very angry? "Abo's"....are you for real? Maybe Perth will lose a racist when you return to the UK?

cricket1again Feb 15th 2009 4:18 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 
Maybe it's me but what's the difference between Abo's and Pommes? As a reference to a race I mean?

DunRoaminTheUK Feb 15th 2009 4:20 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by cricket1 (Post 7289133)
Maybe it's me but what's the difference between Abo's and Pommes? As a reference to a race I mean?

So 'Paki' is ok then by that same token? :rolleyes:

camponotus Feb 15th 2009 4:20 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by cricket1 (Post 7289133)
Maybe it's me but what's the difference between Abo's and Pommes? As a reference to a race I mean?

''Pommes'' is in a league all of its own as a term because the Aussies have decreed that they can say that as much as they like without ever being accused of using a rascist term.

That's all the difference you need, isn't it?

bcworld Feb 15th 2009 4:21 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by DunRoaminTheUK (Post 7289135)
So 'Paki' is ok then by that same token? :rolleyes:

Oh god.......please.....NOT AGAIN! :eek:

And to the OP......brilliant rant.....loved it!

camponotus Feb 15th 2009 4:22 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by camponotus (Post 7289136)
''Pommes'' is in a league all of its own as a term because the Aussies have decreed that they can say that as much as they like without ever being accused of using a rascist term.

That's all the difference you need, isn't it?

My point being that none of these terms are appropriate, but Aussies are allowed to get away with using ''pomme'' and ''pommie'' as much as they like, for some reason.

I find it indicative of the arrogance of Australians and the unflinching subservience of the British.

cricket1again Feb 15th 2009 4:45 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by DunRoaminTheUK (Post 7289135)
So 'Paki' is ok then by that same token? :rolleyes:

I'm not trying to offensive but I honestly believe it only becomes an issue when people make it one. I agree that if it's used in a derogatory manner, then it's not acceptable, but then what's the difference between calling someone a 'Paki, Pomme, Abo or fat? Where do you draw the line and just let it go?

brits1 Feb 15th 2009 4:54 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by starsun (Post 7284802)
Oh dear! I just read this post about my home town - Perth. Now I am all for pointing out Perth's faults and having lived there for 26 years before moving abroad and having lived away now for 5 years, I believe I am in a good position to comment in an unbiased manner. Since leaving Perth I have lived in New York, Washington DC, Sydney and now Moscow. But I guess I am still one of Perth's uneducated, unwordly, untravelled racist idiots right? Despite my Masters in International Law from one of the top law schools in the US? Yeah, all people from Perth are living in the 80's. My wardrobe is completely all from the 80s, absolutely. I have no fashion sense at all. Either do any of my friends who are from Perth and either still live there or live in London, Paris, Sydney or other parts of the world. Yep, we are all just unfashionable uneducated idiots.

You know what the funniest thing is - all the top law firms from the UK come over and try and recruit us to come and work for them. And then pay us lots of money to move over and do so. Guess they don't think we are all idiots.

I am well aware of Perth's flaws - the trading hours, the isolation, the small-town mentality, the god-awful suburbs. But there are some very very smart, cool people who live in Perth and there are some great suburbs, great restaurants and great cafes, if you know where to go. And I am sorry - the beaches are amazing. There is no denying that.

So obviously this guy has left Perth and I hope he is happy back in the UK - but if you are going to criticise, at least be balanced about it. I love having fish and chips down at Fremantle - on the water. I do it every time I am back. And having breakfast down at Cottesloe - also fantasic. Margaret River - gorgeous wineries, gorgeous beaches.

So knock Perth all you like - but lots of people love it, are happy there and it gave me everything I could hope for as a child growing up there. The universities are excellent (despite your claim people are uneducated idiots) and there are great companies there, offering excellent work opportunities.

I just couldn't let this post sit, without someone coming to Perth's defence.

:cool:

Perth does have some nice things ofcourse it does nearly everywhere in the world does...BUT...and here's the but....after doing Cottelsloe (don't go there very often now...full of youths getting drunk and acting stupid) Freo...(how many times can you eat fish and Chips and get excited....plus I have to say over the last 5 years or so the standards have really gone down and prices way up) and if you are lucky enough to live near Beauford Road (one of the best areas in Perthfor cafe's....pubs etc but again not a large area especially as it is close to the City....Subi is overated nice but again such a small area for a such an isolated City of which Perth is) we have "done" these area's and more many times over but when you actually live here and know that's your choice's after the years it does wear you down.....I admit if I were here on holiday I would visit these places and think they are nice.....I have been very fortunate myself and have travelled widely and I think that's what I miss the most....the variety, the difference..ie culture....and history.....and if we are being honest...Perth just does not have that......

brits1 Feb 15th 2009 5:01 pm

Re: The Final Rant
 

Originally Posted by DunRoaminTheUK (Post 7289135)
So 'Paki' is ok then by that same token? :rolleyes:

Well I find it offensive...one as far as we know my family have had no convicts reported in our family tree, we paid an awful lot of money to live here in Aus...(ironic I suppose) and usually when said it's never been in a "nice" way...plus I was raised not to use such terms....I would never think of calling an Aussie a Convict, since we have lived here I have heard things I have not heard if ever things like Wog,Blackie,Coon,Chogie,Rag Head.......and all supposed to be "a friendly" term.....but it's not always the case....my neighbour finds it offensive (French speaking Asian,Marisian..honestly) but never says anything as it's always "just joking mate"....kind of thing.....


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