So, flights booked and people told. I am heading home in November (ready for Christmas!). I thought long and hard about going home and whether it was indeed the right thing to do and decided that, yes it was.

I spend a lot of time now fantasising about putting my first foot down on the great British soil, about meeting up with friends in the local for a pint or five, wandering around ASDA for hours, watching decent television and harrassing my family with cuddles. But then every so often i get a pang of panic. I panic intermittently that i am doing the wrong thing and wimping out because things here are "different". My biggest fear i guess is getting all the way home and then realising ive done the wrong thing. But not being in a financial situation to get back here again.

Are these occasional feelings of panic normal and do you guys get them sometimes too, or are they a sign im doing the wrong thing?!

Naomi xx

I know just how you feel. We are heading back in December and I occasionally get those 'panics' as well. I think to myself I must be nuts giving up this lifestyle, especially when other people I tell keep going on about how bad the UK is etc, and how fab it is here. I know though deep down i am making the right decision, as the I want to go back feelings are stronger than the I want to stay ones.
I have previously been back and forth so that aspect doesnt worry me, in fact its made me realise even more which path is now the right one.
Have faith! You are doing the right thing!

Perfectly normal I should think - not that I know, because I dont have the luxury of leaving. When one is stung by a wrong decsion you certainly do panic about making another one (negative reinforcement does that to you!).

You are not wimping out by leaving here, you are making a sound decision based on what you know about the place you now live in and the place you are proposing to return to. You are now in a good position to look dispassionately at both places and make a judgement about what you value in your life and how both of those places live up to your values.

With luck when you get home you will be able to look at UK through new eyes and value all the positives it has going for it.

You will love Christmas in England!!!!

I know what you mean about the lifestyle. Im 100% sure im doing the right thing and then the sun comes out and im on the citycat on the river about to go to meet friends in the park for a BBQ and i'll think "shit, what am i doing?!".

The thing is though that, no, i wont get those things in my life in England, but i'll benefit much more in other areas ... i cant be frustrated and incomplete like this forever ... i need my home!

So will this be your last trip home?!

Thanks Quoll. The mad thing is, is how much everyone and his dog seems to think you're desperate for their opinion on your decision. All my family/friends/colleagues!!! etc keep telling me how mad i am for leaving, how awful the UK is, the terrible economic state its in, how life is so depressing etc etc etc. But the thing is, these people arent here, they arent living my life and so i dont know how they can be so ... righteous!!

As you say, i am making a sound decision based on my own experiences, and i am the only person who can do that for me.

Doesnt stop the odd waver of doubt though! Cant wait for Christmas!

xx

I think a lot of people in Australia are either blind or brainwashed actually. Some of them have had no wider experience and others are trying to justify the major move they have inflicted on themselves and cannot possibly acknowledge that maybe, just maybe they made a huge mistake!

You are so right, no one else can weigh up the things that are important to you. I'd say go for it because I can assure you that if you dont feel like you belong there now, you wont feel like you belong there 20 years down the track either but by then you will be entrenched and trapped.

{{{hugs}}}

Yes, you're so right- i should escape while i can! I feel quite empowered now after your little pep-talk!

you're a star xxx

dont go by anyone elses intincts or opinions of how you will settle back in the uk, nobody is trapped anywhere in this world and dont be too hasty especially if you have children, and as you are having these pangs of slight regret before have even left dont be suprised if you join the thousands of pingpongers that return to oz every year,,, as the last post said we feel the same, but here in the uk TRAPPED, for now though!!!!!

I reckon gut instincts are really powerful things and if yours is telling you to get your butt back to the UK, then it's the right thing for you to do.

I'm just the same as you, constanly questioning what the hell I'm doing leaving this lifestyle: the house/pool/beach/sunshine, especially when the kids are settled and OH is very happy to stay here too. But I always ask myself the same question "Do you want to live here for the rest of your life Trace?" and the answer is always and emphatic "NO!"

I have spoken to so many middle aged/older women who came over here years ago, and a lot of them say exactly the same thing: they wished they'd never come, or wished they'd left years ago to go home but can't now because they've got grandkids here etc. I don't want to be one of those women

I also think the lifestyle here starts to engulf a person. You become accustomed to the fancy houses, pool, sunshine etc and assimilate to it. Therefore, going home, after a while, becomes alien to us. But at the end of the day, all of those things don't mean a lot to the 'inner self' in the great scheme of things. It's all just 'stuff'.

Follow your heart, listen to your gut, get on that plane and make the very best of your life back in the UK.

Some months ago whilst discussing my thoughts on leaving Canada and returning to the UK, with my daughter - who lives in the UK - she said that we, her parents, sometimes spend too long analysing this and that, and that we should go with our hearts this time, not with our heads.
So - hearts it is, and we're on our way on June 29th.
Today has been a gorgeous day - hot and breezy, and I decided the hell with packing yet another box, I'd sit in the garden and relax. So, I got to thinking about leaving........ I know when we get back we won't have the huge garden, or the view or the summers we have here......BUT..... I will have her, and my parents and sister and Home......and that's worth going home for. Think about what you're gaining, not what you're leaving.

Oh - and one other thing.....most of us had moments of panic at leaving the UK for wherever.......so surely it's normal to feel the same sort of apprehension at another big move?

That's such a good post! it is all just 'stuff' you really do have to go with your gut instincts and think about what you want out of life. We've only just got to Brisbane and it will do us for now but we will go back to Britain one day I'm sure of that.

I bloody hope so! I am going to ask the Australian Customs not to let me in if I return!

Haha! Famous last words!!

Where abouts in the west country are you going back to cherry? I'm a west country gal myself!

xx

This is SO true. The sun and the space and the nice house and the barbeques can't sustain you, being able to share life with those people you love is what MAKES life, not a destination or a "lifestyle". Shame it took me quite a bit of money and 12,000 miles to figure that one out!

Sheesh, Tracey, I AM one of those women. Nice to know I am an example to someone in my old age