I suggest www.britishexpats.com then its much better for reading these messages.

You never answered my questions about whether the wedding is in France or the US.

As Andy says, when dealing with the BCIS you do not want to give them a reason to deny you. Whether its logical or not, they could consider a blessing as a wedding. It has happened I think. So be careful.

[email protected] (Kristina) wrote in message news:<[email protected] om>...
    > This question has been posed on a different board and I'd like some
    > more feedback...
    >
    > If we don't get our K-1 in time for our Catholic wedding (I'd like to
    > set the date for September 4, 2004) can we just get married by a
    > priest but NOT file any paperwork with the state of Ohio? Is this
    > really illegal? (Provided, of course, that the priest would permit
    > this.) I didn't think a wedding was a legal marriage without some sort
    > of official court document. My NOA 1 is dated December 15 and I'm
    > worried that 8 1/2 months is not enough time to obtain the K-1 thru
    > the NSC and the US Embassy in Paris.
    >
    > Your help would be great. Thanks.

------

Hi Kristina,
I got married in the RC church and we had to take engaged
encounter/pre cana that is a church requirement in most parishes. My
fiance came to my country(CDN) and did the engaged encounter weekend
on one of his visits. Getting married civilly is not seen as
sacramental in the Church's eyes. We did the K3, married in my
country, because my US (now) husband did not want to plan a wedding. I
also think the K3 is going faster from what I am reading. You should
talk to the priest in your fiance's parish and find out how to proceed
if you haven't already. I think in France Church and Government are
different?

I'm in a similar situation - it can be very tricky and I've had to postpone my wedding 3 times due to BCIS screwups. My priest in Scotland is happy to perform a full nuptial mass for us after we are legally married in the US. The only difference is that we won't have a marriage license in the UK or sign the register. In the continent this is quite normal, so the Catholic Church doesn't have an issue with it, but legally you have to be married first.

My advice would be not to set a date though, it's too awful when you are calling people for the third time telling them the date is postponed and there is nothing you can do about it!

Kristina,

Sounds like you're in a similar situation we were in.

Our main problem was that we couldn't find a catholic priest willing to work with us once we got our K1. We didn't plan on ANY date until I got my visa, which was VERY WISE... because it turned out that what we THOUGHT was going to be maximum wait (180 days wait + 30 days to get the visa, etc.) turned out to be far longer thanks to NSC's problems... so our planned "safe date" we were hoping for (Sept. 2003) never could have happened. I got my visa November 5, 2003.

Anyway.

All this being said, our problem was that no priest would marry us without 6 months advance notice/pre-canna courses. We only have 90 days, not 6 months...

So, we chose to do a very intimate legal ceremony (which is happening in a few weeks!), and later this summer do a blessing with the catholic church.

The problem with the catholic church is that for your marriage to be VALID in their eyes, the marriage HAS TO BE REGISTERED IN THE CHURCH'S DOCUMENTS - with the parish AND with the bishop's office. EVEN IF IT IS JUST A BLESSING.

To the eyes of the church, your legal marriage (before or after) isn't the important one. It's the Catholic church date/papers that matter.

THIS is why it's difficult to assume that even if it's unlicensed and not registered with the state that it's not a "legal marriage". When you bring religion, and especially religious organisations with such complex hierarchy and administrative power, into the mix, you're playing with fire.

In the end, what is going to matter is the opinion of the USCIS officers who examine your case. AND how the church is going to look at your union.

If I were you - and I'm not - I'd play it safe. WAIT. Don't plan on dates. Things can happen, things can go wrong... you never know... and it's usually not your fault. So. Wait it out, do a civil ceremony in the US once you have your K1, THEN plan a "real wedding" blessing, take your time, invite family, and do the whole shebang...

Good luck!

Elly

"Elenfair" <member9538@british_expats.com> wrote:

    > All this being said, our problem was that no priest would marry us
    > without 6 months advance notice/pre-canna courses. We only have 90
    > days, not 6 months...

This really does differ from priest to priest (probably dioscesan rules have
something to do with it too). Friends of ours (no immigration issues here)
who got married in a Catholic church in Arlington, VA got to choose between
the series of meetings and a weekend retreat - they chose the retreat.

Andy.

--
I'm not really here, it's just your warped imagination

I do think that it all depends on the priest. Some of them are
sticklers and others frankly don't care. As far as pre-caana classes
go, I'm pretty lucky: our priest agreed to let us pass our
pre-marital counseling in France last summer, so at least we're done
with that!!!

And it's probably a good idea to wait to plan the wedding, maybe until
NOA 2 ??

*****Anyone have any idea how long the US Embassy in France takes to
approve
K-1s once they receive all necessary documentation?*****




EllieGlasgow <member19647@british_expats.com> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...
    > I'm in a similar situation - it can be very tricky and I've had to
    > postpone my wedding 3 times due to BCIS screwups. My priest in Scotland
    > is happy to perform a full nuptial mass for us after we are legally
    > married in the US. The only difference is that we won't have a marriage
    > license in the UK or sign the register. In the continent this is quite
    > normal, so the Catholic Church doesn't have an issue with it, but
    > legally you have to be married first.
    >
    >
    >
    > My advice would be not to set a date though, it's too awful when you are
    > calling people for the third time telling them the date is postponed and
    > there is nothing you can do about it!
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Originally posted by Kristina
    >
    > > This question has been posed on a different board and I'd like some
    >
    > > more feedback...
    >
    > >
    >
    > > If we don't get our K-1 in time for our Catholic wedding (I'd like to
    >
    > > set the date for September 4, 2004) can we just get married by a
    >
    > > priest but NOT file any paperwork with the state of Ohio? Is this
    >
    > > really illegal? (Provided, of course, that the priest would permit
    >
    > > this.) I didn't think a wedding was a legal marriage without some sort
    >
    > > of official court document. My NOA 1 is dated December 15 and I'm
    >
    > > worried that 8 1/2 months is not enough time to obtain the K-1 thru
    >
    > > the NSC and the US Embassy in Paris.
    >
    > >
    >
    > Your help would be great. Thanks.

[email protected] (Kristina) wrote in message news:<[email protected]. com>...
    > I do think that it all depends on the priest. Some of them are
    > sticklers and others frankly don't care. As far as pre-caana classes
    > go, I'm pretty lucky: our priest agreed to let us pass our
    > pre-marital counseling in France last summer, so at least we're done
    > with that!!!
    >
    > And it's probably a good idea to wait to plan the wedding, maybe until
    > NOA 2 ??
    >
    > *****Anyone have any idea how long the US Embassy in France takes to
    > approve
    > K-1s once they receive all necessary documentation?*****
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > EllieGlasgow <member19647@british_expats.com> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...
    > > I'm in a similar situation - it can be very tricky and I've had to
    > > postpone my wedding 3 times due to BCIS screwups. My priest in Scotland
    > > is happy to perform a full nuptial mass for us after we are legally
    > > married in the US. The only difference is that we won't have a marriage
    > > license in the UK or sign the register. In the continent this is quite
    > > normal, so the Catholic Church doesn't have an issue with it, but
    > > legally you have to be married first.
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > > My advice would be not to set a date though, it's too awful when you are
    > > calling people for the third time telling them the date is postponed and
    > > there is nothing you can do about it!
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > > Originally posted by Kristina
    > >
    > > > This question has been posed on a different board and I'd like some
    >
    > > > more feedback...
    >
    > > >
    >
    > > > If we don't get our K-1 in time for our Catholic wedding (I'd like to
    >
    > > > set the date for September 4, 2004) can we just get married by a
    >
    > > > priest but NOT file any paperwork with the state of Ohio? Is this
    >
    > > > really illegal? (Provided, of course, that the priest would permit
    >
    > > > this.) I didn't think a wedding was a legal marriage without some sort
    >
    > > > of official court document. My NOA 1 is dated December 15 and I'm
    >
    > > > worried that 8 1/2 months is not enough time to obtain the K-1 thru
    >
    > > > the NSC and the US Embassy in Paris.
    >
    > > >
    > >
    > > Your help would be great. Thanks.

thats interesting to read about other faiths

I have never been to a catholic wedding
"reargunner666" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
    > [email protected] (Kristina) wrote in message
news:<[email protected]. com>...
    > > I do think that it all depends on the priest. Some of them are
    > > sticklers and others frankly don't care. As far as pre-caana classes
    > > go, I'm pretty lucky: our priest agreed to let us pass our
    > > pre-marital counseling in France last summer, so at least we're done
    > > with that!!!
    > >
    > > And it's probably a good idea to wait to plan the wedding, maybe until
    > > NOA 2 ??
    > >
    > > *****Anyone have any idea how long the US Embassy in France takes to
    > > approve
    > > K-1s once they receive all necessary documentation?*****
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > >
    > > EllieGlasgow <member19647@british_expats.com> wrote in message
news:<[email protected]>...
    > > > I'm in a similar situation - it can be very tricky and I've had to
    > > > postpone my wedding 3 times due to BCIS screwups. My priest in
Scotland
    > > > is happy to perform a full nuptial mass for us after we are legally
    > > > married in the US. The only difference is that we won't have a
marriage
    > > > license in the UK or sign the register. In the continent this is
quite
    > > > normal, so the Catholic Church doesn't have an issue with it, but
    > > > legally you have to be married first.
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > > My advice would be not to set a date though, it's too awful when you
are
    > > > calling people for the third time telling them the date is postponed
and
    > > > there is nothing you can do about it!
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > >
    > > > Originally posted by Kristina
    > > >
    > > > > This question has been posed on a different board and I'd like some
    > >
    > > > > more feedback...
    > >
    > > > >
    > >
    > > > > If we don't get our K-1 in time for our Catholic wedding (I'd like
to
    > >
    > > > > set the date for September 4, 2004) can we just get married by a
    > >
    > > > > priest but NOT file any paperwork with the state of Ohio? Is this
    > >
    > > > > really illegal? (Provided, of course, that the priest would permit
    > >
    > > > > this.) I didn't think a wedding was a legal marriage without some
sort
    > >
    > > > > of official court document. My NOA 1 is dated December 15 and I'm
    > >
    > > > > worried that 8 1/2 months is not enough time to obtain the K-1 thru
    > >
    > > > > the NSC and the US Embassy in Paris.
    > >
    > > > >
    > > >
    > > > Your help would be great. Thanks.
    > thats interesting to read about other faiths

In the San Antonio diocese, you can take the Pre-Cana course in one all day session on a Saturday. That was the least of my "problems" to being married in the Catholic Church.