Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Ok - so tomorrow me and kids are back to the Uk for a 10 day pre planned trip - hubby staying to mind the hounds!

Unfort as it has coincided with me at my lowest and really wanting to go home I am managing to get myself into a right state about coming back and havent even packed the sutcases yet.

will some one please give me slap and tell me to just go, enjoy my hol, come back, shoulders back, chest out, do the ski season and then decide on my next step in life..

actually that feels better already . . .

What will I see - a beautiful Uk or a place full of chavs - will let you know peeps . . . . . .

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

SLAP!! Hope that helps;)
I remember my first trip back after being in Canada for about a year and I remember being on a bus in Belfast and saying to my OH rather smugly thank goodness we life in Canada now. But that was before we had kids and before the boredom had set in. I don't dislike Canada but it was never really "home". I really hope you enjoy your trip back and work out what you need to do to be happy. Good luck:)

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Mental isnt it... happens to all of us.

Only trouble is Elaine, im having the thoughts the other way round now. The work situ here is driving me nutso. At least you're up there, with regards to the cost of living. Down here its outrageous!

I'd go back to tomorrow if i could.

Slap away!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Whatever happens enjoy your trip, we will be thinking of you
:thumbsup:

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

We went back in April after 2 years, I had a great time and it was definately harder coming back this time, my kids saying goodbye to my mum was the hardest bit (I'm really not helping here am I?) but if you know its not going to be for long it won't be so bad and you never know you might remember why you left in the first place.

Have a great trip and keep us posted

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Sorry to hear things are still not great for you when the work situation sucks everything looks grim. Of course the grass is so much greener north of the border;)

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

SLAP SLAP...listen, you will see abit of both, beauty and the beast.

I see more beauty as i'm sure you will. Don't go looking for the bad things, enjoy yourself and embrace.;)

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

My advice would be don't read the press nor watch the news on tv and just judge it on what you personally actually see and experience. Enjoy.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Just count your blessings and enjoy your holiday. I am sure you will be fine because you know you will be planning for something else afterwards.

I tend to see the beauty (except in Plymouth where I saw the chavs!).

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Have a wonderful time and, as someone already said, don't even pick up a newspaper! I was there in August and it was really lovely - until I happened to look through a Daily Mail or something like that and there I saw a very different picture and not one that reflected my own experiences.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Good luck with the visit :thumbup: . Dont dread it just enjoy. When I went back this summer I kind of dreaded it too. Dont know why really, think I was scared of liking it too much, I never left because I hated it. The visit turned out well, I had a great time and it put things into perspective for me. Neither country is better they are just different

Your canadian adventure doesnt have to be for ever, its really ok which ever you choose. Dont be too hard on yourself, if you need to move back then so be it .

Just relax and enjoy the next few weeks.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Chill out, relax and enjoy the holiday. Best empty your mind of all thoughts Canadian and returning for most of the trip until the last day or so and then see how your're feeling.

When we were in the UK for 10 days in September I didn't think about Canada or the impending return at all after the first day. It was only two days before we were due to return that the realization dawned we had to come back to Canada and we really didn't want to.

I watched the news, looked at the papers and we even observed some Chavs in their natural habitat and none of it put us off returning in the slightest. Have fun and eat some Galaxy chocolate on behalf of my wife.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Thanks all -will let you know how it goes. Currently trying to get dd to remove half her clothes -she seems to think that as we can take 2 x 23kg suitcases each that she has to!!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Hope you enjoy your trip. Like others have said just enjoy your stay and try to put whatever else is happening on the back-burner.

I recently came back from a UK visit. I really noticed how some parts of the UK are really pretty and some of the architecture is superb. There definitely, however, seems to be a huge gap between the have's and have-not's. It seems to be quite tricky to find a nice (affordable) area to live in with finding work, schools etc. There is definitely more of a good/bad areas factor then here, I find.

Also really noticed the variance in pricing of goods. Some things are a bargain and at other times it seemed expensive. If you shop around, I think that goods can be cheaper in the UK, but if you accept convenience you'll pay through the nose. Pricing seems pretty constant here and not as much discounting.

I really appreciated UK media (for all it's faults). Lively interesting TV/radio/newspapers etc. It was a pretty exhausting trip, for emotional reasons I won't go into here, but I would move back in an instant. Sadly OH, didn't seem quite so enamoured with the UK this time round.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

You know what, not all chavs are bad. Most of the one's around here seem fairly harmless

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

That's funny as I visited some rellies in Plymouth and I just 'saw' the new shopping centre...a great improvement on the former stuff....I hadn't been for many many years (to Plymouth not the UK).

Also I left UK just before the term CHAV came into fashion...so despite trips back, I'm still not quite sure how to identify said person.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

I maybe malign Plymouth but the last couple of times I have been there has been no doubt that there were loads of chavs (and I didnt really know what they were either, just people you would tend to veer to the other side of the road to avoid mainly). I guess I was surprised because I didnt see the same phenomenon elsewhere.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

You don't seem to get Chav's per se here in Canada, but you do get the homeless or gangsta wannabee culture instead. All 'white trash' though.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

OK, so what is a CHAV, really?

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Here we go . . .


From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
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Chav (pronounced /ˈtʃæv/ (CHAV)), charve(r) or scally (in northern England), steek (in Northern Ireland), ned (in Scotland) and lad in Australia is a derogatory term applied to certain young people in the United Kingdom. The stereotypical chav is an aggressive teenager or young adult who often engages in anti-social behaviour,[1] such as street drinking, drug abuse and rowdy behaviour. They are often assumed to be unemployed or in a low paid job,[2] although it is incorrect to assume that all chavs are working class, as chavs belong to no distinct social class. The term Charver is more widely used in North East England.[3] Stereotypical "chavs" typically wear tracksuits and hoodies made by sporting brands such as Nike and Adidas and listen to mainly MC and some have been known to listen to Rap, R'n'B, Hip Hop and Techno.[citation needed]
A stereotypical "chav"

"Chavette" or Millie (in Northern Ireland) is a term generally used for female "chavs", similar to "lad" and "lass".


Response to the term has ranged from amusement to criticism that it is a new manifestation of classism.[4] One BBC TV documentary suggested that "chav" culture is an evolution of previous working-class youth subcultures associated with particular commercial clothing styles, such as mods, skinheads and casuals.[5] The term has been associated with juvenile delinquency, the ASBO Generation and yob culture.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

I'd disagree, I can only speak for Montreal but I can truly say that Chavs exist but by a different name. There are certain areas of the city where they are even predominant, all you need to do is substitute Citroen Saxo's for Chrysler Neon's.

General society doesn't seem to pay them as much attention as we do in the UK, which is why you'd never know about them unless you actually went to these areas.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Do the ski season I say!! When I arrived in April I really hated it here. I dislike the way they drive here, the food, the shopping ect. Give me Waitrose, Sainsbury anytime. However, as time went on we sort of got used to things here and fortunately my 4 year old boy really likes it here (probably because he gets to do outdoor stuff here much more than in London). It really took us a good 4-6 months to get settled down here and to start liking this place. This is the first time in my life that I am actually looking forward to winter!! Got our ski passes ready and will head for the mountains once snow comes! I find checking out the skiing websites lifts my moral when I feel down about being here.
Good luck and have a good trip.

J

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

So we leave for Canada tomorrow - Daughter already beside herself - me - just empty :( really dont want to go but have to - -hubby, dogs house etc. . .think I may actually be clinically depressed i feel so goddam low! :(

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Sorry you're feeling so crappy I guess now you're pretty sure where you'd rather be living and hopefully you can start planning. Take care of yourself and remember there is light at the end of the tunnel:wub:

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Also sorry to hear you are feeling so rough Carrie :(

Right then missus - two plans of attack.

One - get steamingly drunk on the plane, or

Two - spend the flight plotting and planning your next move.

I know you've mentioned how you feel about Canada, but I can't recall what your OH's thoughts are ... would he support a move back?

Despite feeling really depressed, go and see someone about it - doctor, counsellor, good friend. You won't be able to think straight or make well-considered plans for your future while you are befuddled, low or angry.

I know in your heart you feel moving back would be best so I won't spout on about giving it more time, etc. But I guess I would just ask you to bear that in mind :p

I also understand that the job front has not been a welcome side (I sooo understand that) - so if you are anything like me, your confidence has taken a bit of a battering. Chin up ol' bean - you are a fabulous, confident, employable and wonderful asset that has just not yet been recognised.

Have a great day with the rellies and we'll speak again on the other side. "Enjoy" the flight and take care of yourself and your daughter. Big smiles for her 'cos she will feed off your mood. Fake it honey, fake it ....for a wee while longer. (Your duvet awaits you :p ).

Hugs :wub:

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

thanks guys x x x

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

forgot to add - Hubby seems ok with coming back - but not the chavs!! He has a phone interview for a job in bucks on tuesday morning - so maybe some light . . . . I have been useless all week - my friends are really worried bout me - dont want to gp back on meds - had been on prozac b4 for bulimia - until am back in Uk with my old Dr - oh I dunno!!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Hold that image of the final future flight back to the UK in your mind. If it's any consolation, once you made the decision to return it seems to make things a little easier as you know you're not in Canada forever and you've got something to work towards that helps take your mind off things.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Keep yer pecker up gal!!! Its good that hubby has phone interview for job in Bucks!!

Does anyone know how to broach the job subject when you have applied for a job and you are in Canada? What I mean is that I have been applying or jobs using my Dads UK address, and today there is a letter Dad said, which he scanned and sent to me. The company want me to contact them re an interview- how should I talk to them about it so that at least I can get a telephone interview? (sorry I can post separately but just thought as you had mentioned it in your posting).

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Best be straightforward with them. If you can give them a firm date for your return to the UK or can go over for work ahead of time they'll be understanding.

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

I can totally empathise ,felt exactly the same way when we came back in April.
Sounds as if you're one step ahead of us with the interview lined up so you just need to concentrate on your escape plan now.
I did feel a little better once we were actually back its mainly the trauma of all the goodbyes (or at least it was for me) which were so much worse 2nd time around.
Thinking of you and sending you some karma

Diane

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Keep your chin up! Hope all works out for you. We are going back to Uk for christmas and will probably be exactly the same!! Gonna have to throw my husband on the plane!!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Aw {{{hugs}}} you may well be depressed - situational depression is a real thing, unfortunately only cured by removing yourself from the depressing situation. I know how you feel though - I howl all the way from Cambridge to London usually (very scary for all the other train passengers!) and then again on the plane out of H'row and the gloom when they say "Welcome to Australia":thumbdown:

But, chin up, you will get through it and now you know where you want to live the only life you have, then you can start to work out how to achieve that. In the mean time if your doctor offers you medications or therapy - try the therapy, there are tricks for helping the mind think that things arent as bad as they seem (thought stopping works for me). And start planning for your next trip back to sanity! Good luck tomorrow, it will be a sh*t of a day but you will live through it!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Thanks all - will let you know when we have arrived - just off to scrape daughter off floor !! poor thing is one big soggy snotty mess! am JUST holding it together! but tids v v hard!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

I go back for 10 days on Sunday also leaving hubby here, he's afraid I won't come back...... tempting as I miss home so much. I will see my contract through till March 2011, then I know it's time to go back. May even leave a bit early and return for xmas next year. Hope all went well, will exchange notes on my return.
Karen

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

that's nice your going back for Xmas hun. Remember and come back tho'!!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

in our family another name we use is for people you avoid is 'Barry Lagers' young groups of lads wearing footie shirts and very drunk
I recounted this in my NZ office where we have Chinese, Ozzies and NZ's they thought this was a great term in fact is now officially adopted here!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

Just think that coming back is a necessary part of planning your permanent return - which it is.
Don't think about leaving, think about it positively - got to come back to close up and get back, it is a temporary phase and you will do it

Take care of yourself, see you on the 6th?

Elaine

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

deffo! will need it!

Re: Back to Uk for 10 days
 

We call them Neds here in Scotland but they are the exact same species.....they are being bred quite steadily.....disaffected youths in the main, disadvantaged through no fault of their own at all for the most part as the most discriminated against section of UK society are first and foremost....young males, whether white, black, brown but mostly white young men.

These guys are brought up in single parent families with no male around at all as some kind of role model.....this has increasingly been the case since the 1980s.....single mothers who have no desire at all to have a man around the house....so boys are at a major disadvantage from the moment they emerge from the womb.

They then go to school and find themselves even more sinned against and disadvantaged as the education system they enter up on massively feminised under a policy and a system which is heavily geared to favour girls so from the word go the boys are virtually regarded as some kind of "underclass". In many cases in primary schools they will find all the teachers are female, and a fair proportion of those female teachers go so far as to marginalise the boys in many ways - often driven by some kind of agenda in which a higher value is placed on girls and their education and development rather than on boys. So even at school these young boys find there is no role model for them. Even the classroom curriculum is heavily weighted in favour of the girls.

So, both at home and in schools very many young boys are actually discriminated against and made to feel of less value.

When they go home and watch TV the heavily feminist agenda influenced media further impresses on the minds of the young men that they are a sort of second class species and very often the male of the species is portrayed in a negative light in so many ways. Positive portrayals of males are underplayed while those of the females are either ignored or very much underplayed.

TV ads show males as either stupid, ignorant or useless while females are routinely shown as being super efficient, sweetly innocent in a permanent state of victimhood - all sugar and spice and all things nice sort of thing....

So what else is there for these young lads to do but to act as they do? All in all it isn't their fault that they turn into neds or chavs, dependfing where you live in this island nation of ours.

So here are some chavs in Manchester, England - out doing their stuff because nobody has guided them to do anything better as far too many people just don't wand to know as they are only boys after all.......lads who are not so much sinning, but very much sinned against by society.

You can bet your next month's salary that while these lads are out on the streets running wild their "mothers" (what a misnomer that one is!) are either out at bingo, down the pub getting nissed as a pewt or shagging their latest piece of you know what......probably another ned or a chav who has not been taught to know any better because he has been deprived of any kind of decent MALE role model......Ned/Chav Britannia at its best:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqyU2...eature=related