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American DH is having awful time finding job

American DH is having awful time finding job

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Old Jan 30th 2013, 12:25 pm
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Default American DH is having awful time finding job

Hi Folks,

It's been a while since I updated--hope everyone is getting along well.

I've put this in the general section because I'm also sort of looking for advice too, but feel free to move to the update session if you feel it's more appropriate.

Anyway, me and my son have been back around 18 months now. My American DH joined us at the end of June so it's been about 7 months for him. We're at a difficult stage: me and my son are doing great, my DH not so much. My son is about to turn 3 and is one of the main reasons we moved: he's thriving, loves living over here, he goes to a great nursery that costs a fraction of what I used to pay in the USA and is miles better. He loves having a garden, and parks, and places to go where you're not treated like a leper for having children. I'm also doing well--I was very fortunate to get a gradue-level job in a niche sector less than two months after moving here, my friends are around me, I just generally am much better.

My DH is 7 months out without having found any work and this will be a deal breaker for him. I know it's an awful economy and jobs are scarce, particularly in the public sector which is what he wants to do, but I'm just running out of ideas.

He's put out around 150 applications, had around 25 interviews and no bites. He always asks for feedback and on the rare occasions he gets it (most places ignore requests for it) he's told he's either overqualified or doesn't have experience in X ("the NHS", "Higher Ed", whatever else). In the US he was an immigration officer (earned his degree part-time) so he's having a hard time getting anyone to buy in to how his experience and skills translate to a job. (He's applied to a few roles at the US Embassy I thought he'd get interviews for but hasn't heard anything back from them).

I think his CV is OK, but I'm worried about his interviewing technique--I'm sure he rambles a bit and has a hard time selling himself....I don't know if there's anywhere he can go to get help with this though as he's not entitled to job seekers allowance etc, so would he be entitled to job centre workshops etc?

He's worked with a couple of temp agencies (did had a brief 2 month call centre placement with them--went for a permanent role afterwards and was told he's overqualified) but has generally found these useless...they either ignore him or put him forward for one thing and we never hear from them again or get repeatedly fobbed off when trying to get in touch with them. (One actually yelled at him for calling back for some clarification on why he hadn't been successful!)

He is so miserable because he feels like he's not contributing anything and because until he finds work we're kind of stuck living with my parents. I just don't know any more ways I can help him--I help him learn stuff for interviews, proof read applications, help him search for things to put in to. I don't really know what more he can do...people have suggested volunteering but we're in a rural area where there aren't that many charities (mostly charity stores) and that won't really help him get relevant experience.

If anyone has any ideas, advice or tea and sympathy it would be very much appreciated!
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 2:43 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

If you go onto www.uk-yankee.com there is a section about work in the stickies at the yop there used to be advice about cv's it was written by a USC living in UK who worked in HR and it gives really good advice. I had my son use her advice to re write his US reume and he got work in a few weeks.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 3:10 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Originally Posted by just_jenn
Hi Folks,

It's been a while since I updated--hope everyone is getting along well.

I've put this in the general section because I'm also sort of looking for advice too, but feel free to move to the update session if you feel it's more appropriate.

Anyway, me and my son have been back around 18 months now. My American DH joined us at the end of June so it's been about 7 months for him. We're at a difficult stage: me and my son are doing great, my DH not so much. My son is about to turn 3 and is one of the main reasons we moved: he's thriving, loves living over here, he goes to a great nursery that costs a fraction of what I used to pay in the USA and is miles better. He loves having a garden, and parks, and places to go where you're not treated like a leper for having children. I'm also doing well--I was very fortunate to get a gradue-level job in a niche sector less than two months after moving here, my friends are around me, I just generally am much better.

My DH is 7 months out without having found any work and this will be a deal breaker for him. I know it's an awful economy and jobs are scarce, particularly in the public sector which is what he wants to do, but I'm just running out of ideas.

He's put out around 150 applications, had around 25 interviews and no bites. He always asks for feedback and on the rare occasions he gets it (most places ignore requests for it) he's told he's either overqualified or doesn't have experience in X ("the NHS", "Higher Ed", whatever else). In the US he was an immigration officer (earned his degree part-time) so he's having a hard time getting anyone to buy in to how his experience and skills translate to a job. (He's applied to a few roles at the US Embassy I thought he'd get interviews for but hasn't heard anything back from them).

I think his CV is OK, but I'm worried about his interviewing technique--I'm sure he rambles a bit and has a hard time selling himself....I don't know if there's anywhere he can go to get help with this though as he's not entitled to job seekers allowance etc, so would he be entitled to job centre workshops etc?

He's worked with a couple of temp agencies (did had a brief 2 month call centre placement with them--went for a permanent role afterwards and was told he's overqualified) but has generally found these useless...they either ignore him or put him forward for one thing and we never hear from them again or get repeatedly fobbed off when trying to get in touch with them. (One actually yelled at him for calling back for some clarification on why he hadn't been successful!)

He is so miserable because he feels like he's not contributing anything and because until he finds work we're kind of stuck living with my parents. I just don't know any more ways I can help him--I help him learn stuff for interviews, proof read applications, help him search for things to put in to. I don't really know what more he can do...people have suggested volunteering but we're in a rural area where there aren't that many charities (mostly charity stores) and that won't really help him get relevant experience.

If anyone has any ideas, advice or tea and sympathy it would be very much appreciated!
Hi Jenn, I can't offer any advice on your partner's job search and you're a bit too far away to share a cuppa (or a nice glass of red!). You sound like a lovely person and you're doing everything humanly possible to support your partner, and he's obviously trying his hardest.

This jumped out at me from your post

He is so miserable because he feels like he's not contributing anything and because until he finds work we're kind of stuck living with my parents

Unless someone can come up with an idea to help him secure employment, it seems the only thing you can both do at the moment is try to find ways to manage with situation until he finds work. Much easier said than done, I know! Maybe if your partner (sorry to keep calling him that but I don't know if you're married and I don't want to say the wrong thing!) could focus a bit more on all the good, wonderful, happy things that the move has given you and your son, he might realise that far from not contributing, he has given you a priceless gift. For your little one to be so happy and thriving in his new home, for you to have found a good job and have the security and comfort of your friends around you - if he realised that he is an integral part of that it might help a bit.

Are your parents up for a bit of babysitting? If you and your - er - other half could spend a bit of time together alone it might take the pressure off. To be constantly either thinking about getting job, writing applications for a job, interviewing for a job, receiving continual rejections from a job application - it's so easy for that to take over to the exclusion of simple, happy things.

I wish you and (that man you live with) all the luck in the world. With the incredible support he gets from you, combined with the effort he's putting in, I have no doubt that job will happen.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 3:10 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

One of the words I hate most when interviewing is you are "overqualified". Seems easy way not to give a person a job. I really hope your husband finds a job - tell him not to to give up!
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 3:38 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Hello Jenn,

This may have already crossed your or his mind but has your husband considered some form of volunteer activity. There are a myriad of different organizations around and the combination of experience, contacts and feeling of actually contributing might be worthwhile. I know a few people who have gained jobs from this method. I know it sounds like a lot of effort with no certainty but it will cure the sense of worthlessness. If money is not the absolute issue at this point he can choose the type of activity. I am not sure where you are located, to be able to offer specific advice but am sure you can research that side of things.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 4:37 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Hi Jenn,
I can't offer any job advice, but just wanted to say welcome back.
We moved back from five years in the US last summer. We are both British, we were there on a job transfer.
I'm glad to hear you and your little boy are doing well and enjoying being back.
I'll keep my fingers, toes and everything else crossed that your husband finds a good job. With all those applications he really deserves some good luck soon!
I know what it's like, I wrote 100 applications before getting my first teaching job. That was during a recession in the early 80s.
Hubby had a six month job search once. Not fun.
The UK Yankee forum may be a good bet for tips on how to get jobs in this country.
Anyway, that's me, offering a cyber cup of tea and sympathy!
So, good luck to your family and keep us updated.Persistence will pay off, I'm sure! Love to you all!
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 7:07 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Thank you so much for your input folks, it really means a lot!

I'm going to get Hubby on UK Yankee and hopefully he can get some tips there! He did have an interview for what would be an awesome job for him yesterday so please keep your fingers crossed and think positive thoughts for us!!!
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 7:25 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Thinking them!
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 7:28 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Yup I can relate to where your husband is at, OP. I live in New Zealand and it took me a year to find a temporary job that has now ended. So, I'm back on the job search treadmill. My husband is in work so if we are careful we can get by. Did we really come all the way from Britain to NZ in February 2011 to, 'just get by' ?

I totally relate to the poster who remarked that when applying for jobs, getting ready for interviews, steeling yourself after yet another turn down etc etc you can't think of anything else or get the enjoyment out of simple things. I ended up having some sort of melt down last year as I wondered if I would ever get a job.

I applied for a job in a company that was more my level than the more senior position that I was interviewed and turned down for last year. They didn't even interview me ! That hurt. For the record, that was the only post-interview feed back that I got out of the various half dozen or so interviews in a whole year. Despite being told by some that if I hadn't had feedback I should ask for it. I did. I'm still waiting.

Continually applying for jobs which even one application can take hours is about as much fun as homework. Your confidence takes a knock when they turn you down either with or without interview so making more applications gets harder and harder. Then your motivation starts to slide. It gets you down after a while but you have no choice but to continue on the same route to despair. Especially as people in work have no idea what they are talking about when they tell you there's lots of work around just now. How would they know ? (oops, didn't mean for this to stray into a rant !)

So now I'm back to making more and more applications just to get more and more turn downs. When they can even be bothered to do that. The (international brand) employment agency in this town didn't get me any work in the year that I was on their books. I was never unemployed for this long in Britain. Never ever. (Don't know how I would get on in Britain right now though).

I'm into office administration. Anyone who thinks it's easy to get work should really walk in my shoes. OK, some people opt for retail or housekeeping roles. Not me. It's not that I think I'm to good for that, but why shouldn't I be able to spend my working day doing work I can do ? I'd do summat in an office I'm not to proud to do mundane office work. I've said it before and I'll say it again, 'it's only New Zealand and I won't grovel'. I don't believe people working for minimum wage jobs grovel either, it's just a personal opinion of mine about me.

BTW I do voluntary work. I did office work on a voluntary basis which was good and as fate would have it, I had to give it up as my temporary job started shortly after I started my (totally unrelated) voluntary office work role ! I also helped with a senior citizens social group one day a week. I'm back to volunteering at the social group as a helper, its not admin, just so I can feel useful.

Last edited by Snap Shot; Jan 30th 2013 at 7:48 pm.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 7:51 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Originally Posted by just_jenn
Thank you so much for your input folks, it really means a lot!

I'm going to get Hubby on UK Yankee and hopefully he can get some tips there! He did have an interview for what would be an awesome job for him yesterday so please keep your fingers crossed and think positive thoughts for us!!!
Good luck, I hope he gets the right outcome for this job interview.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 8:31 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Originally Posted by just_jenn
Thank you so much for your input folks, it really means a lot!

I'm going to get Hubby on UK Yankee and hopefully he can get some tips there! He did have an interview for what would be an awesome job for him yesterday so please keep your fingers crossed and think positive thoughts for us!!!
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 9:06 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Hi Jenn,

I feel for you and your family. I was in the same situation when I came back to the UK after a year out of the country. It took me about 5 months of being quite persistent until I got offered a job in my profession. Checking back in my inbox I sent out just under 400 speculative letters. The problem I had, as you've mentioned, jobs were scarce in my profession but I couldn't get work in shops or cafes as I was overqualified (even though I had done these types of jobs before!). Can't win! After a while it does begin to grate on you and as a person you feel a tad useless.

The first pointer I would give you is make sure your OH's CV is excellent! OK or good wont cut it in the UK at the moment. It has to stand out. Some of the jobs he will be applying for will have 200 applicants plus and you don't want his CV to blend in with everyone else's and end up in the bin. As you mentioned he is getting interviews, but perhaps he would be offered more if his CV was perfected. Also make sure his CV and cover letter are specifically targeted to the job he is applying for. I must have about 10 different CV's and hundreds of different letters. I went to a CV and cover letter workshop, which was put on by the job centre (I was on job seekers allowance at the time). If you aren't on JSA you can pay to attend these as well. It was an excellent workshop running over 2 days and the advice I took away from it was invaluable. It also gave me a pick me up from being unemployed and a little more confidence. I'm pretty sure they do interview technique as well.

I had the same thing with interview feedback! I ended up phoning people up in the end, then they couldn't get out of it!

Working within the public sector is a tough one at the moment. With the state of the economy, people losing jobs and generally not having the funds it will be a tough call. Personally I would focus your search else where but keep an eye out in case anything comes up.

I wish you all the best and hope it works out for you.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 9:21 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Originally Posted by Snap Shot
I'm into office administration. Anyone who thinks it's easy to get work should really walk in my shoes. OK, some people opt for retail or housekeeping roles. Not me. It's not that I think I'm to good for that, but why shouldn't I be able to spend my working day doing work I can do ? I'd do summat in an office I'm not to proud to do mundane office work. I've said it before and I'll say it again, 'it's only New Zealand and I won't grovel'. I don't believe people working for minimum wage jobs grovel either, it's just a personal opinion of mine about me..
I've got to say I disagree with this. I'm in NZ at the moment (Chch) and until I can find a more suitable job I have taken on some part time cleaning work. Do I want to do it? God no! But you gotta do what you gotta do. It's not forever and it means the OH and I can afford to enjoy a weekend away thanks to my cleaning wages. If I wasn't working doing anything I can then we wouldn't be able to do that. You also never know what may come of it. You may start out housekeeping/cleaning and an admin role within the same company may crop up and you have first dibs.

Having to accept jobs that are not in your skill set is not ideal by a long shot, but by doing so it may well lead to other opportunities, the chance to meet lifelong friends and you never know you may you enjoy doing something different!

Last edited by Pom_Chch; Jan 30th 2013 at 9:24 pm.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 9:38 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Originally Posted by Mummy in the foothills
The best thing is that he is getting interviews. That means he is 50% of the way to getting a job.
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Old Jan 30th 2013, 9:39 pm
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Default Re: American DH is having awful time finding job

Originally Posted by just_jenn
Hi Folks,

It's been a while since I updated--hope everyone is getting along well.

I've put this in the general section because I'm also sort of looking for advice too, but feel free to move to the update session if you feel it's more appropriate.

Anyway, me and my son have been back around 18 months now. My American DH joined us at the end of June so it's been about 7 months for him. We're at a difficult stage: me and my son are doing great, my DH not so much. My son is about to turn 3 and is one of the main reasons we moved: he's thriving, loves living over here, he goes to a great nursery that costs a fraction of what I used to pay in the USA and is miles better. He loves having a garden, and parks, and places to go where you're not treated like a leper for having children. I'm also doing well--I was very fortunate to get a gradue-level job in a niche sector less than two months after moving here, my friends are around me, I just generally am much better................ would be very much appreciated!
I see great plus's and minus's here. Clearly his CV is great, 25 interviews out of 150 applications is a great ratio. But 25 interviews and no offers is bad, meaning, what you suspect is correct, he's interviewing skills must be really bad. Without knowing him i cant be specific. But I will say Americans can come off as brash and overconfident in interviews (i've interviewed my fair share for my job in Los Angeles), and as he was an immigration officer i can guess he probably is.

Perhaps doing role playing with him might help.

Last edited by ldollard; Jan 30th 2013 at 11:02 pm.
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