So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
Jun 13th 2005, 6:42 am
#1
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So You Think You Know The UK. A Guide For All Foreigners
Britain was created in 1906 by Rodney Philp as a present for his mother's birthday. Sadly, delayed building work ruined the suprise.
Britain was discovered in 1969 when Neil Armstrong spotted it from the moon.
In 1566, most Victorian families kept a small boy lodged in their chimney for a rainy day. Those that escaped fled to the North and drew on their common experiences to consruct the city of Manchester.
It's five past fumbling in the chocolate box village of Minging, where the Ladies Guild are having a behind closed doors photo session for their no-holds barred, fully clothed, 2005 calendar for the easily offended.
To celebrate the Millienium in the year 2000 the Church of England floated Jesus on the London Stock Exchange.
The famous British Swans are in fact Flamingos which have lost their legs in road trafiic accidents. They are painted white, fitted with small motors and placed in lakes and ponds.
Britain was set up by universal studios as a place to nurture villians for blockbuster movies.
Graffiti is applied by special undercover policemen as a means of identifying areas of high unemployment and violent crime.
Fatty foods (like cakes and biscits) were invented for fat people so they could have something to eat.
The villagers of Lower Thrusting are not backward in coming forward. Quite the contrary, they have perfected the art of coming forward when backward, thanks to the efforts of Mrs Spode and her WI volunteers.
In the coastal town of Tynemouth, they hold an annual day where they allow pirates to raid their town and fix it all up with the insurance.
In Britain, roundabouts were installed in 1904 at cliffs to stop people driving into the sea.
There is a girl with 6 toes in Biggleswade who lives under the bridge near the A1 motorway.
The population of Britian is made up almost entirely of men and women of both sexes split roughly in uneven numbers.
In the village of Lower Piddle, the charge for unclamping is £80 for cars, £45 for wheelchairs and £1.50 (each) for nipples.
Britain is the only country in the world to provide stairs for able bodied people.
Hills were invented in 1810 by Sir Chomping Hill as a cheap substitute for mountains. Since then many have grown to as much as five feet in height.
In the Northern town of Houghton-le-Spring it is illegal to throw souffle at guinea pigs on the 3rd Sunday of the month.
Wales was built by a farmer from Shrewsbury in 1883.
Next-door neighbours were invented by the working class in 1994.
Scotland was supposed to be called Wales, but it was found that the name had already been taken.
Britain is filmed in front of a live studio audience.
PG Tips can only be drunk in the presence of a parent or gaurdian. 12A Tips are less strictly enforced.
Zebra crossings were introduced in Britain in 1974 due to the increased number of them holidaying from their native Africa
And finally
Thank you for calling Britain. Our lines are open 9am to 5pm. All our operators are currently busy. Your call is important to us. Please hold the line. Goodbye!
Britain was discovered in 1969 when Neil Armstrong spotted it from the moon.
In 1566, most Victorian families kept a small boy lodged in their chimney for a rainy day. Those that escaped fled to the North and drew on their common experiences to consruct the city of Manchester.
It's five past fumbling in the chocolate box village of Minging, where the Ladies Guild are having a behind closed doors photo session for their no-holds barred, fully clothed, 2005 calendar for the easily offended.
To celebrate the Millienium in the year 2000 the Church of England floated Jesus on the London Stock Exchange.
The famous British Swans are in fact Flamingos which have lost their legs in road trafiic accidents. They are painted white, fitted with small motors and placed in lakes and ponds.
Britain was set up by universal studios as a place to nurture villians for blockbuster movies.
Graffiti is applied by special undercover policemen as a means of identifying areas of high unemployment and violent crime.
Fatty foods (like cakes and biscits) were invented for fat people so they could have something to eat.
The villagers of Lower Thrusting are not backward in coming forward. Quite the contrary, they have perfected the art of coming forward when backward, thanks to the efforts of Mrs Spode and her WI volunteers.
In the coastal town of Tynemouth, they hold an annual day where they allow pirates to raid their town and fix it all up with the insurance.
In Britain, roundabouts were installed in 1904 at cliffs to stop people driving into the sea.
There is a girl with 6 toes in Biggleswade who lives under the bridge near the A1 motorway.
The population of Britian is made up almost entirely of men and women of both sexes split roughly in uneven numbers.
In the village of Lower Piddle, the charge for unclamping is £80 for cars, £45 for wheelchairs and £1.50 (each) for nipples.
Britain is the only country in the world to provide stairs for able bodied people.
Hills were invented in 1810 by Sir Chomping Hill as a cheap substitute for mountains. Since then many have grown to as much as five feet in height.
In the Northern town of Houghton-le-Spring it is illegal to throw souffle at guinea pigs on the 3rd Sunday of the month.
Wales was built by a farmer from Shrewsbury in 1883.
Next-door neighbours were invented by the working class in 1994.
Scotland was supposed to be called Wales, but it was found that the name had already been taken.
Britain is filmed in front of a live studio audience.
PG Tips can only be drunk in the presence of a parent or gaurdian. 12A Tips are less strictly enforced.
Zebra crossings were introduced in Britain in 1974 due to the increased number of them holidaying from their native Africa
And finally
Thank you for calling Britain. Our lines are open 9am to 5pm. All our operators are currently busy. Your call is important to us. Please hold the line. Goodbye!
Last edited by MJC; Jun 13th 2005 at 7:03 am.
Jun 13th 2005, 6:44 am
#2
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
Are you not mean't to be working 
Jun 13th 2005, 6:46 am
#3
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
I must have been a woman in a previous life cos I CAN do 2 things at once!!
Originally Posted by Rumble Tumble
Are you not mean't to be working
Jun 13th 2005, 6:48 am
#4
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Joined: Jan 2005
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
Dahling could you please put an 'E' on the end of Guid, in your subject title please, as we are talikng about the UK.........pmsl 
Thx sweety
Thx sweety
Jun 13th 2005, 6:53 am
#5
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guide For All Foreigners
I noticed that too, but I don't know how to!!
Originally Posted by Rumble Tumble
Dahling could you please put an 'E' on the end of Guid, in your subject title please, as we are talikng about the UK.........pmsl
Thx sweety
Thx sweety
Jun 13th 2005, 6:59 am
#6
Sat on the fence ......
Joined: Jan 2005
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guide For All Foreigners
Originally Posted by MJC
I noticed that too, but I don't know how to!!
Jun 13th 2005, 7:04 am
#7
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guide For All Foreigners
Nope, just changes the title of that post, not the thread.
Oh well, everyone can laugh at me now (makes a change eh?)
Oh well, everyone can laugh at me now (makes a change eh?)
Originally Posted by Rumble Tumble
Go to your 1st post and Edit i think
Jun 13th 2005, 7:07 am
#8
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Joined: Jan 2005
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guide For All Foreigners
Originally Posted by MJC
Nope, just changes the title of that post, not the thread.
Oh well, everyone can laugh at me now (makes a change eh?)
Oh well, everyone can laugh at me now (makes a change eh?)
Jun 13th 2005, 7:09 am
#9
Sat on the fence ......
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: in between here & there....
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guide For All Foreigners
Originally Posted by Rumble Tumble
It's changed what are you on about........OI who did that
This is an emergency don't you know.TS.....BOB........HELP
Jun 13th 2005, 9:21 am
#10
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Posts: 301
Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
This guide sounds suspiciously like the comments in Little Britain
Jun 13th 2005, 1:20 pm
#11
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
Originally Posted by Rumble Tumble
Dahling could you please put an 'E' on the end of Guid, in your subject title please, as we are talikng about the UK.........pmsl
If you know what I am taliking about...
Jun 13th 2005, 2:01 pm
#12
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
Originally Posted by Welivehere
Whilst one is in a glass house, one should not presume to throw stones...
If you know what I am taliking about...
If you know what I am taliking about...
Eh?
Jun 13th 2005, 2:02 pm
#13
Sat on the fence ......
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: in between here & there....
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guid For All Foreigners
Originally Posted by Welivehere
Whilst one is in a glass house, one should not presume to throw stones...
If you know what I am taliking about...
If you know what I am taliking about...
Jun 13th 2005, 3:51 pm
#14
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Re: So You Think You Know The UK. A Guide For All Foreigners
Originally Posted by MJC
Britain was created in 1906 by Rodney Philp as a present for his mother's birthday. Sadly, delayed building work ruined the suprise.
Britain was discovered in 1969 when Neil Armstrong spotted it from the moon.
In 1566, most Victorian families kept a small boy lodged in their chimney for a rainy day. Those that escaped fled to the North and drew on their common experiences to consruct the city of Manchester.
It's five past fumbling in the chocolate box village of Minging, where the Ladies Guild are having a behind closed doors photo session for their no-holds barred, fully clothed, 2005 calendar for the easily offended.
To celebrate the Millienium in the year 2000 the Church of England floated Jesus on the London Stock Exchange.
The famous British Swans are in fact Flamingos which have lost their legs in road trafiic accidents. They are painted white, fitted with small motors and placed in lakes and ponds.
Britain was set up by universal studios as a place to nurture villians for blockbuster movies.
Graffiti is applied by special undercover policemen as a means of identifying areas of high unemployment and violent crime.
Fatty foods (like cakes and biscits) were invented for fat people so they could have something to eat.
The villagers of Lower Thrusting are not backward in coming forward. Quite the contrary, they have perfected the art of coming forward when backward, thanks to the efforts of Mrs Spode and her WI volunteers.
In the coastal town of Tynemouth, they hold an annual day where they allow pirates to raid their town and fix it all up with the insurance.
In Britain, roundabouts were installed in 1904 at cliffs to stop people driving into the sea.
There is a girl with 6 toes in Biggleswade who lives under the bridge near the A1 motorway.
The population of Britian is made up almost entirely of men and women of both sexes split roughly in uneven numbers.
In the village of Lower Piddle, the charge for unclamping is £80 for cars, £45 for wheelchairs and £1.50 (each) for nipples.
Britain is the only country in the world to provide stairs for able bodied people.
Hills were invented in 1810 by Sir Chomping Hill as a cheap substitute for mountains. Since then many have grown to as much as five feet in height.
In the Northern town of Houghton-le-Spring it is illegal to throw souffle at guinea pigs on the 3rd Sunday of the month.
Wales was built by a farmer from Shrewsbury in 1883.
Next-door neighbours were invented by the working class in 1994.
Scotland was supposed to be called Wales, but it was found that the name had already been taken.
Britain is filmed in front of a live studio audience.
PG Tips can only be drunk in the presence of a parent or gaurdian. 12A Tips are less strictly enforced.
Zebra crossings were introduced in Britain in 1974 due to the increased number of them holidaying from their native Africa
And finally
Thank you for calling Britain. Our lines are open 9am to 5pm. All our operators are currently busy. Your call is important to us. Please hold the line. Goodbye!
Britain was discovered in 1969 when Neil Armstrong spotted it from the moon.
In 1566, most Victorian families kept a small boy lodged in their chimney for a rainy day. Those that escaped fled to the North and drew on their common experiences to consruct the city of Manchester.
It's five past fumbling in the chocolate box village of Minging, where the Ladies Guild are having a behind closed doors photo session for their no-holds barred, fully clothed, 2005 calendar for the easily offended.
To celebrate the Millienium in the year 2000 the Church of England floated Jesus on the London Stock Exchange.
The famous British Swans are in fact Flamingos which have lost their legs in road trafiic accidents. They are painted white, fitted with small motors and placed in lakes and ponds.
Britain was set up by universal studios as a place to nurture villians for blockbuster movies.
Graffiti is applied by special undercover policemen as a means of identifying areas of high unemployment and violent crime.
Fatty foods (like cakes and biscits) were invented for fat people so they could have something to eat.
The villagers of Lower Thrusting are not backward in coming forward. Quite the contrary, they have perfected the art of coming forward when backward, thanks to the efforts of Mrs Spode and her WI volunteers.
In the coastal town of Tynemouth, they hold an annual day where they allow pirates to raid their town and fix it all up with the insurance.
In Britain, roundabouts were installed in 1904 at cliffs to stop people driving into the sea.
There is a girl with 6 toes in Biggleswade who lives under the bridge near the A1 motorway.
The population of Britian is made up almost entirely of men and women of both sexes split roughly in uneven numbers.
In the village of Lower Piddle, the charge for unclamping is £80 for cars, £45 for wheelchairs and £1.50 (each) for nipples.
Britain is the only country in the world to provide stairs for able bodied people.
Hills were invented in 1810 by Sir Chomping Hill as a cheap substitute for mountains. Since then many have grown to as much as five feet in height.
In the Northern town of Houghton-le-Spring it is illegal to throw souffle at guinea pigs on the 3rd Sunday of the month.
Wales was built by a farmer from Shrewsbury in 1883.
Next-door neighbours were invented by the working class in 1994.
Scotland was supposed to be called Wales, but it was found that the name had already been taken.
Britain is filmed in front of a live studio audience.
PG Tips can only be drunk in the presence of a parent or gaurdian. 12A Tips are less strictly enforced.
Zebra crossings were introduced in Britain in 1974 due to the increased number of them holidaying from their native Africa
And finally
Thank you for calling Britain. Our lines are open 9am to 5pm. All our operators are currently busy. Your call is important to us. Please hold the line. Goodbye!
