My medical.
Dec 5th 2009, 11:20 am
#1
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My medical.
My son (16) an I left home and traveled down to London on the train, we had a night booked in a hotel about 2 minutes walk from the Doctors. The appointment was at 10.30am the following day, we could have travelled down that morning, but I have no faith in any public transport system in this country and taking a friends advice the thought of turning up for the medical stressed and late didn't bear thinking about.
The two weeks running up to the medical have been hell, you have to take paperwork, passports, inoculation certificates and photographs with you, I had all these ready in an envelope but became obsessive about checking them to see if they were still there! Coupled with that is the ‘Immigration Demons’ who run around in your head, you diagnose yourself with every disease imaginable eventually if you cant find one to fit you invent one!
I woke up at 5am remarkably I had a really good nights sleep which was a shock (posh hotel beds and pillows!) I spoke to hubby as always, he was telling me everything was ok and that there was nothing to worry about, I was of course terrified! Overnight all my diseases (self diagnosed or made up) had multiplied I even decided I had bubonic plague of the eyelash! We had breakfast (which I cannot believe I kept down) checked out of the hotel and went to our appointment.
We gave our name at reception and handed over the required documents (yes I had them all) they were a bit dog eared due to the excessive amount of checking that they had received for the last 2 weeks! The receptionist was very friendly and asked us to take a seat. Son was fine, I was trying to keep calm but it’s so difficult no matter how many times you read other peoples experiences, this is you! The receptionist gave us a consent form to sign for our HIV test and another form to complete (identical to the ones we had filled out prior to the medical as far as I could tell.) We both completed them handed them back and they gave us our Passports back.
A nice lady then called me through (she was obviously the injection nurse) she asked if I was aware I needed an MMR, I was I told her my Doctors had refused to do it as their excuse is they only carry ‘baby doses’ she said this was rubbish I’d guessed that (my Doctors have been less than helpful throughout this process, I live in a village in Shropshire and I don’t think they have heard that a MR Columbus has discovered a big place across the Atlantic called America yet!) She gave me the MMR (it is actually cheaper at the Medical than my Doctors have charged for any injection anyway!)
I was then taken to another room where a very nice man asked me to remove my clothes to my waist and put on a gown and call him when I was ready. He then did my chest xray I kept the gown on for this, you have to hold your breath whilst they do it, funny how the simple act of breathing becomes difficult when someone tells you to, we had a little joke about it!
I was asked to take a seat in a small waiting room and after about 5 minutes a lady Doctor called me through, (she was very young, or am I just getting old?) First of all she went through the questions that I had answered, I had an operation on my foot a few years ago and I explained about that, I had as instructed also typed out the details on a separate sheet.
I was then asked to sit on the couch and do an eye test which was no problem she then checked in my mouth and eyes. I then had to and touch my toes and she ran her hand down my spine, I then did deep breathing and she listened to my chest. I was then asked to lie down, she opened my gown and gently prodded my chest and abdomen, pulled my pants forward and said “Yep your a girl” (I always thought I was I think it was the pain of childbirth that really sealed the deal for me!) My blood pressure was taken, which was fine (its always been a bit low so I guess the nerves had pushed it up to normal!) Then she took my pulse and said that it was fast but not to worry it was just nerves, took my blood sample (very painless,) she then asked me to stay lying on the bed and raise my arm, after a few minutes she said put tight pressure on it, your nerves are causing your adrenaline to pump and it wont stop bleeding (great I knew I couldn't have got through the whole thing without something going wrong!) After 10 minutes or so she let me sit up and said I could sit in the waiting room for 10 minutes before going as she wanted to make sure it wasn't going to bleed any more. As I left her room she put her hand on my arm and said don’t worry everything is fine I felt that was such a kind thing to say to someone who is so nervous.
I walked into the waiting room and my son was still sitting in the same place as I had left him, he said “Where have you been I’ve been done for ages?” I calmly pointed out through gritted teeth that I was not 16 and therefore things took longer, it didn’t take him 2 seconds however to work out my arm was dead straight and I was holding a blood stained piece of cotton wool on it, he found this highly amusing and proceeded to give me a lecture on nerves getting the better of me (Smart Ass!)
When the bleeding stopped I paid the bill, relieved that it was over they said that my results would be at the Embassy on Monday and I would not hear from then unless there was a problem. I then thanked the ladies for their help and kindness explaining that throughout the process you deal with e mails or letters or web sites and they were the first ‘humans’ I had met throughout the process, they said that was very sweet of me at this I burst into tears and had to run out of the place!
Of course I’m typing this and I still wont be able to settle until Monday when I know the results are at the Embassy, safe in the knowledge that I haven't been diagnosed with black death of the earlobe!
The two weeks running up to the medical have been hell, you have to take paperwork, passports, inoculation certificates and photographs with you, I had all these ready in an envelope but became obsessive about checking them to see if they were still there! Coupled with that is the ‘Immigration Demons’ who run around in your head, you diagnose yourself with every disease imaginable eventually if you cant find one to fit you invent one!
I woke up at 5am remarkably I had a really good nights sleep which was a shock (posh hotel beds and pillows!) I spoke to hubby as always, he was telling me everything was ok and that there was nothing to worry about, I was of course terrified! Overnight all my diseases (self diagnosed or made up) had multiplied I even decided I had bubonic plague of the eyelash! We had breakfast (which I cannot believe I kept down) checked out of the hotel and went to our appointment.
We gave our name at reception and handed over the required documents (yes I had them all) they were a bit dog eared due to the excessive amount of checking that they had received for the last 2 weeks! The receptionist was very friendly and asked us to take a seat. Son was fine, I was trying to keep calm but it’s so difficult no matter how many times you read other peoples experiences, this is you! The receptionist gave us a consent form to sign for our HIV test and another form to complete (identical to the ones we had filled out prior to the medical as far as I could tell.) We both completed them handed them back and they gave us our Passports back.
A nice lady then called me through (she was obviously the injection nurse) she asked if I was aware I needed an MMR, I was I told her my Doctors had refused to do it as their excuse is they only carry ‘baby doses’ she said this was rubbish I’d guessed that (my Doctors have been less than helpful throughout this process, I live in a village in Shropshire and I don’t think they have heard that a MR Columbus has discovered a big place across the Atlantic called America yet!) She gave me the MMR (it is actually cheaper at the Medical than my Doctors have charged for any injection anyway!)
I was then taken to another room where a very nice man asked me to remove my clothes to my waist and put on a gown and call him when I was ready. He then did my chest xray I kept the gown on for this, you have to hold your breath whilst they do it, funny how the simple act of breathing becomes difficult when someone tells you to, we had a little joke about it!
I was asked to take a seat in a small waiting room and after about 5 minutes a lady Doctor called me through, (she was very young, or am I just getting old?) First of all she went through the questions that I had answered, I had an operation on my foot a few years ago and I explained about that, I had as instructed also typed out the details on a separate sheet.
I was then asked to sit on the couch and do an eye test which was no problem she then checked in my mouth and eyes. I then had to and touch my toes and she ran her hand down my spine, I then did deep breathing and she listened to my chest. I was then asked to lie down, she opened my gown and gently prodded my chest and abdomen, pulled my pants forward and said “Yep your a girl” (I always thought I was I think it was the pain of childbirth that really sealed the deal for me!) My blood pressure was taken, which was fine (its always been a bit low so I guess the nerves had pushed it up to normal!) Then she took my pulse and said that it was fast but not to worry it was just nerves, took my blood sample (very painless,) she then asked me to stay lying on the bed and raise my arm, after a few minutes she said put tight pressure on it, your nerves are causing your adrenaline to pump and it wont stop bleeding (great I knew I couldn't have got through the whole thing without something going wrong!) After 10 minutes or so she let me sit up and said I could sit in the waiting room for 10 minutes before going as she wanted to make sure it wasn't going to bleed any more. As I left her room she put her hand on my arm and said don’t worry everything is fine I felt that was such a kind thing to say to someone who is so nervous.
I walked into the waiting room and my son was still sitting in the same place as I had left him, he said “Where have you been I’ve been done for ages?” I calmly pointed out through gritted teeth that I was not 16 and therefore things took longer, it didn’t take him 2 seconds however to work out my arm was dead straight and I was holding a blood stained piece of cotton wool on it, he found this highly amusing and proceeded to give me a lecture on nerves getting the better of me (Smart Ass!)
When the bleeding stopped I paid the bill, relieved that it was over they said that my results would be at the Embassy on Monday and I would not hear from then unless there was a problem. I then thanked the ladies for their help and kindness explaining that throughout the process you deal with e mails or letters or web sites and they were the first ‘humans’ I had met throughout the process, they said that was very sweet of me at this I burst into tears and had to run out of the place!
Of course I’m typing this and I still wont be able to settle until Monday when I know the results are at the Embassy, safe in the knowledge that I haven't been diagnosed with black death of the earlobe!
Dec 5th 2009, 3:59 pm
#3
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Joined: Aug 2009
Location: Silicone Valley
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Re: My medical.
Thanks Ian.
Although I've now developed neuroma of the 3481st hair folicle to the right behind me ear!
Although I've now developed neuroma of the 3481st hair folicle to the right behind me ear!
Dec 5th 2009, 9:54 pm
#5
Concierge
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 46,392
Re: My medical.
You wrote such a wonderful review of your medical. I was in stitches reading it and I adore your son's reaction to you when you finally came out. It was priceless.
Congratulations and I do believe that hair folical disease is exempt from exclusion. At least for the 3481st one. But do watch it doesn't spread to the 10,967th one.
Congratulations and I do believe that hair folical disease is exempt from exclusion. At least for the 3481st one. But do watch it doesn't spread to the 10,967th one.
Dec 5th 2009, 11:50 pm
#6
Joined: Apr 2005
Location: Milwaukie, Oregon
Posts: 9,966
Re: My medical.
Hilarious but I'm baffled as to why you were not worried the x-ray might only show one lung. Just the interview now then, nothing to worry about at all 
Dec 6th 2009, 11:25 am
#7
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Joined: Aug 2009
Location: Silicone Valley
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Re: My medical.
Ok you were all right............
I checked behind my knee, and I found cream colored fluff, it either came off my bed or..............My stuffings falling out!
I have now counted the hair follicles 8 times and I keep losing count when I get to 8,427, although I'm sure I found a bout of smallpox on number 749!
Now searching for www.howhaveilivedthislongwithonlyonelung.com
The interview will be a simple, I've checked the website 34 1/2 times and nowhere does it state that I cant take a wheelbarrow in with me to cary the photocopies, of the photocopies of the copies I have made so far!
Seriously, to anyone reading this the medical really really is not as bad as your 'Immigration Demons' will lead you to think. The staff are fully aware of peoples situation and go out of their way to be kind, lighthearted and friendly whilst remaining very professional.
I checked behind my knee, and I found cream colored fluff, it either came off my bed or..............My stuffings falling out!
I have now counted the hair follicles 8 times and I keep losing count when I get to 8,427, although I'm sure I found a bout of smallpox on number 749!
Now searching for www.howhaveilivedthislongwithonlyonelung.com
The interview will be a simple, I've checked the website 34 1/2 times and nowhere does it state that I cant take a wheelbarrow in with me to cary the photocopies, of the photocopies of the copies I have made so far!
Seriously, to anyone reading this the medical really really is not as bad as your 'Immigration Demons' will lead you to think. The staff are fully aware of peoples situation and go out of their way to be kind, lighthearted and friendly whilst remaining very professional.
Dec 6th 2009, 5:05 pm
#8
Irritant
Joined: Oct 2008
Location: London~Eventually St Pete Florida
Posts: 166
Re: My medical.
Haha! What would we do without the drama?!
So glad it went well, and I know you will feel so much better when they DON'T call you.
Warning, check your chest x-ray before you start showing it to impressionable youngsters. I got back to work on Thursday and whipped it out, discussing my amazingly clean lungs when one of the Junior boys quietly asked, "are those your boobs?".
We all turned back to the X-ray, and yes indeed, my lady lumps were visible.
Merz
So glad it went well, and I know you will feel so much better when they DON'T call you.
Warning, check your chest x-ray before you start showing it to impressionable youngsters. I got back to work on Thursday and whipped it out, discussing my amazingly clean lungs when one of the Junior boys quietly asked, "are those your boobs?".
We all turned back to the X-ray, and yes indeed, my lady lumps were visible.
Merz
Dec 6th 2009, 5:18 pm
#9
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 35,082
Re: My medical.
This thread is the best laugh I've had all week! 
Dec 6th 2009, 5:59 pm
#14
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Joined: Oct 2008
Location: London~Eventually St Pete Florida
Posts: 166
Re: My medical.
However, all the lads can't make eye contact with me now
Dec 6th 2009, 6:01 pm
#15
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Re: My medical.
Thank you now I can nightmare safe and sound in the knowledge that I also have Haemophilia on top of................Well you know the rest!
And if I had more than 2 little fried eggs I'd take my xray to work too!
And if I had more than 2 little fried eggs I'd take my xray to work too!