Justice

This is the first time I'm writing in this group, I found it very
informative so I decided to share my experienc:

Timeline:
- Moved to California February 2nd 2001
- Married to a US citizen on September 29th 2001
- Had my interview on July 8th 2002
- Received my conditional green card on July 15th 2002

Now it is the time to file the I-751, and here is my story:
We love each other, we dated for 5 months and then we got married, we
lived as a wife and husband for 2.5 years and we still live with each
other, recentely I found that my wife is cheating on me, she doesn't
know that I have the evidence, she got pregnant, and mostly it is my
baby, she wants an abortion and abortion is against my beliefs, she
even wants a separation and willing to move out after 3 months.

We both are going to file the I-751 jointly next month and I have a
lot of evidence that our marriage was based on good faith.

Now I started to feel that I have to take action and I've read almost
all posts in this group, and I'm not sure if I can file a battered
spouse waiver in case the divorce happen while the I-751 is pending.

I have the report that shows the blood test result is positive, I also
have some emails, copy and paste from chatting rooms, reports from 2
doctors shows that I suffered stress, anxiety, and depression. Is that
enough evidence to file as a battered spouse?

Thank you all

AGUILA

Perhaps the best route you can take is file jointly, and then when divorce is final you file a new I-751 based on 2 waivers, one marriage entered in good faith but ended through divorce, and subjected to extreme mental cruelty, the emails/chats won't help you, it could be illegal for you to have them if you invade her computer or something there are laws that regulate that, now the letters from doctors in regards to depression and anxiety are excellent proof for subjected to mental cruelty waiver, however you should add a professional evaluation by an expert in the field, such as a psychologist or a psychiatric...

Mtravelkay

Justice wrote:
    > This is the first time I'm writing in this group, I found it very
    > informative so I decided to share my experienc:
    >
    > Timeline:
    > - Moved to California February 2nd 2001
    > - Married to a US citizen on September 29th 2001
    > - Had my interview on July 8th 2002
    > - Received my conditional green card on July 15th 2002
    >
    > Now it is the time to file the I-751, and here is my story:
    > We love each other, we dated for 5 months and then we got married, we
    > lived as a wife and husband for 2.5 years and we still live with each
    > other, recentely I found that my wife is cheating on me, she doesn't
    > know that I have the evidence, she got pregnant, and mostly it is my
    > baby,

What do you mean "mostly it is my baby"?

she wants an abortion and abortion is against my beliefs, she
    > even wants a separation and willing to move out after 3 months.

You won't be able to block the abortion or the separation.

    >
    > We both are going to file the I-751 jointly next month and I have a
    > lot of evidence that our marriage was based on good faith.
    >
    > Now I started to feel that I have to take action and I've read almost
    > all posts in this group, and I'm not sure if I can file a battered
    > spouse waiver in case the divorce happen while the I-751 is pending.
    >
    > I have the report that shows the blood test result is positive, I also
    > have some emails, copy and paste from chatting rooms, reports from 2
    > doctors shows that I suffered stress, anxiety, and depression. Is that
    > enough evidence to file as a battered spouse?

If cheating spouses were counted as mental abuse, the courts would be
full of these spouseal abuse cases.

Get the divorce and file I-751 with evidence of marriage.
Get professional help for the divorce and the immigration issues.

Justice

mtravelkay <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<1Ef5c.10233$y%[email protected]. com>...
    > Justice wrote:
    > > This is the first time I'm writing in this group, I found it very
    > > informative so I decided to share my experienc:
    > >
    > > Timeline:
    > > - Moved to California February 2nd 2001
    > > - Married to a US citizen on September 29th 2001
    > > - Had my interview on July 8th 2002
    > > - Received my conditional green card on July 15th 2002
    > >
    > > Now it is the time to file the I-751, and here is my story:
    > > We love each other, we dated for 5 months and then we got married, we
    > > lived as a wife and husband for 2.5 years and we still live with each
    > > other, recentely I found that my wife is cheating on me, she doesn't
    > > know that I have the evidence, she got pregnant, and mostly it is my
    > > baby,
    >
    > What do you mean "mostly it is my baby"?
I meant mostly I'm the father of the baby
    >
    > she wants an abortion and abortion is against my beliefs, she
    > > even wants a separation and willing to move out after 3 months.
    >
    > You won't be able to block the abortion or the separation.
    > That's why I'm suffeing, legally she can kill my baby (or whatever you call it)without she even talk to me about it.
    > >
    > > We both are going to file the I-751 jointly next month and I have a
    > > lot of evidence that our marriage was based on good faith.
    > >
    > > Now I started to feel that I have to take action and I've read almost
    > > all posts in this group, and I'm not sure if I can file a battered
    > > spouse waiver in case the divorce happen while the I-751 is pending.
    > >
    > > I have the report that shows the blood test result is positive, I also
    > > have some emails, copy and paste from chatting rooms, reports from 2
    > > doctors shows that I suffered stress, anxiety, and depression. Is that
    > > enough evidence to file as a battered spouse?
    >
    > If cheating spouses were counted as mental abuse, the courts would be
    > full of these spouseal abuse cases.
    > If I'm in a normal situation then the story would be totally different, at least I would file for a divorce tomorrow, but because of many thing one of them that I cannot go back to my country because of the political situation, then I have to think many times before I do something maybe I'll regret it in the future, I don't know if all that is not considered as mental abuse!

    > Get the divorce and file I-751 with evidence of marriage.
    > Get professional help for the divorce and the immigration issues.

Justice

AGUILA <member18343@british_expats.com> wrote in message news:<[email protected]>...
    > Originally posted by Justice
    > > This is the first time I'm
    > writing in this group, I found it very
    > > informative so I decided to
    > share my experienc:
    > >
    > > Timeline:
    > > - Moved to California February 2nd
    > 2001
    > > - Married to a US citizen on September 29th 2001
    > > - Had my
    > interview on July 8th 2002
    > > - Received my conditional green card on
    > July 15th 2002
    > >
    > > Now it is the time to file the I-751, and here is my
    > story:
    > > We love each other, we dated for 5 months and then we got
    > married, we
    > > lived as a wife and husband for 2.5 years and we still
    > live with each
    > > other, recentely I found that my wife is cheating on
    > me, she doesn't
    > > know that I have the evidence, she got pregnant, and
    > mostly it is my
    > > baby, she wants an abortion and abortion is against my
    > beliefs, she
    > > even wants a separation and willing to move out after 3
    > months.
    > >
    > > We both are going to file the I-751 jointly next month and
    > I have a
    > > lot of evidence that our marriage was based on good faith.
    > >
    >
    > > Now I started to feel that I have to take action and I've read almost
    >
    > > all posts in this group, and I'm not sure if I can file a battered
    > >
    > spouse waiver in case the divorce happen while the I-751 is pending.
    > >
    >
    > > I have the report that shows the blood test result is positive, I
    > also
    > > have some emails, copy and paste from chatting rooms, reports
    > from 2
    > > doctors shows that I suffered stress, anxiety, and depression.
    > Is that
    > > enough evidence to file as a battered spouse?
    > >
    > > Thank you
    > all
    >
    > Perhaps the best route you can take is file jointly, and
    > then when divorce is final you file a new I-751 based on 2 waivers, one
    > marriage entered in good faith but ended through divorce, and subjected
    > to extreme mental cruelty, the emails/chats won't help you, it could be
    > illegal for you to have them if you invade her computer or something
    > there are laws that regulate that, now the letters from doctors in
    > regards to depression and anxiety are excellent proof for subjected to
    > mental cruelty waiver, however you should add a professional evaluation
    > by an expert in the field, such as a psychologist or a psychiatric...

Aguila,
Thanks for your comments, I'll have an appointment with an Immigration
attorney next Thursday, so I'll see what options do I have.

I think you have a good point regarding the legal issues behind
invading my wife's email account, but there should be some other ways.

Up to this moment, I can say if we'll have an interview within 3-4
months then she will co-operate, the problem is the processing time
that might take up to one year..

Mtravelkay

Justice wrote:
    >>What do you mean "mostly it is my baby"?
    >
    > I meant mostly I'm the father of the baby

That was the question. How are you "mostly" the father?
Either you fully fathered the child or you didn't.

Andrew DeFaria

Justice wrote:

    >>> I have the report that shows the blood test result is positive, I
    >>> also have some emails, copy and paste from chatting rooms, reports
    >>> from 2 doctors shows that I suffered stress, anxiety, and
    >>> depression. Is that enough evidence to file as a battered spouse?
Battered means that battery was committed against your person. From what
you've said so far I think you have a very weak case to claim abuse of
any kind. I'm not a big fan of the "mental abuse/cruelty" crowd.
Somebody saying bad words to you IMHO is not abuse - it's an idiot you
should not be listening to! Above you seem to wish to claim that abuse
is when your spouse cheats on you. No so. I admit that such a thing
sucks big time but it's not, by law, considered abuse nor anywhere close
to a "battered spouse".

    >> If cheating spouses were counted as mental abuse, the courts would be
    >> full of these spouseal abuse cases.
    >> If I'm in a normal situation then the story would be totally
    >> different, at least I would file for a divorce tomorrow, but because
    >> of many thing one of them that I cannot go back to my country because
    >> of the political situation, then I have to think many times before I
    >> do something maybe I'll regret it in the future, I don't know if all
    >> that is not considered as mental abuse!
While you are an immigrant and there are additional considerations that
you should think about before acting, this does not change what spousal
abuse is or is not. If you have a political situation in your home
country and are afraid to return there then that's an asylum case not a
spousal abuse case. Seems to me like you're trying to use the spousal
abuse claim as a crutch in an attempt to stay here. If that it truly the
case then I hope your efforts fail because to me that's abusing the
system. (If you have true abuse then that's OK but you seem to be trying
to claim abuse where none is really present).

And, I'm not sure why you care to play the "abuse card" or the "asylum
card". Why not simply immigrate based on the merit of your current
status? I believe you should be able to self-petition so do so! Or are
there perhaps some other things in your situation that you are not
letting on to?


--
Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.

AGUILA

It astounds me how untrained people have the nerve to come here to state to others for what they qualify or not without knowing the full details of a case for your information Andrew, adultery is key ingredient that causes another human beign mental pain, avoiding effective communication is also mental cruelty, insulting/verbal abuse constitutes mental cruelty... please do us a favor and do some research as to what mental cruelty constitutes...

Mtravelkay

AGUILA wrote:

    > It astounds me how untrained people have the nerve to come
    > here to state to others for what they qualify or not without knowing the
    > full details of a case for your information Andrew, adultery is key
    > ingredient that causes another human beign mental pain, avoiding
    > effective communication is also mental cruelty, insulting/verbal abuse
    > constitutes mental cruelty... please do us a favor and do some research
    > as to what mental cruelty constitutes...
    >

It astounds me how untrained people assume that their definition of
cruelty matches the legal or immigration definition. You only indicated
adultery, not any of the other things you are now stating above. I don't
think adultery, by itself, meets the qualification.

Andrew DeFaria

AGUILA wrote:

    > Originally posted by Andrew DeFaria
    >> Justice wrote:
    >>>> I have the report that shows the blood test result is positive,
    > I
    >>>>> also have some emails, copy and paste from chatting
    > rooms, reports
    >>>>> from 2 doctors shows that I suffered
    > stress, anxiety, and
    >>>>> depression. Is that enough evidence
    > to file as a battered spouse?
    >> Battered means that battery was
    > committed against your person. From what
    >> you've said so far I think
    > you have a very weak case to claim abuse of
    >> any kind. I'm not a big
    > fan of the "mental abuse/cruelty" crowd.
    >> Somebody saying bad words to
    > you IMHO is not abuse - it's an idiot you
    >> should not be listening to!
    > Above you seem to wish to claim that abuse
    >> is when your spouse cheats
    > on you. No so. I admit that such a thing
    >> sucks big time but it's not,
    > by law, considered abuse nor anywhere close
    >> to a "battered spouse".
    >>>> If cheating spouses were counted as mental abuse, the courts
    > would be
    >>>> full of these spouseal abuse cases.
    >>> If I'm in a normal situation then the story would be totally
    >>>> different, at least I would file for a divorce tomorrow,
    > but because
    >>>> of many thing one of them that I cannot go
    > back to my country because
    >>>> of the political situation,
    > then I have to think many times before I
    >>>> do something
    > maybe I'll regret it in the future, I don't know if all
    > that is not considered as mental abuse!
    >> While you are an
    > immigrant and there are additional considerations that
    >> you should
    > think about before acting, this does not change what spousal
    >> abuse is
    > or is not. If you have a political situation in your home
    >> country and
    > are afraid to return there then that's an asylum case not a
    >> spousal
    > abuse case. Seems to me like you're trying to use the spousal
    >> abuse
    > claim as a crutch in an attempt to stay here. If that it truly the
    > case then I hope your efforts fail because to me that's abusing the
    > system. (If you have true abuse then that's OK but you seem to be trying
    >> to claim abuse where none is really present).
    >> And, I'm not sure
    > why you care to play the "abuse card" or the "asylum
    >> card". Why not
    > simply immigrate based on the merit of your current
    >> status? I believe
    > you should be able to self-petition so do so! Or are
    >> there perhaps
    > some other things in your situation that you are not
    >> letting on to?
    >> --
    >> Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
    > It astounds me how untrained people have the nerve to come here to
    > state to others for what they qualify or not without knowing the full
    > details of a case for your information

Ever think that that's exactly why I explicated say "From what you said
so far". Please try to read more carefully next time!

    > Andrew, adultery is key ingredient that causes another human beign
    > mental pain, avoiding effective communication is also mental cruelty,
    > insulting/verbal abuse constitutes mental cruelty... please do us a
    > favor and do some research as to what mental cruelty constitutes...

Which is way I said "I'm not a big fan of the 'mental abuse/cruelty'
crowd"! Again, pay attention. I also admitted that things like adulerty,
etc suck big time. However they do not constitute a battered spouse in
the eyes of the law or the INA and that's what's important here, so do
your own research first before firing off your mouth (and make sure to
actually read the words of the person you are about to come down on).

--
Where there's a will... I want to be in it.

Justice

Andrew DeFaria <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected] ervers.com>...
    > Justice wrote:
    >
    > >>> I have the report that shows the blood test result is positive, I
    > >>> also have some emails, copy and paste from chatting rooms, reports
    > >>> from 2 doctors shows that I suffered stress, anxiety, and
    > >>> depression. Is that enough evidence to file as a battered spouse?
    > >>
    > Battered means that battery was committed against your person. From what
    > you've said so far I think you have a very weak case to claim abuse of
    > any kind. I'm not a big fan of the "mental abuse/cruelty" crowd.
    > Somebody saying bad words to you IMHO is not abuse - it's an idiot you
    > should not be listening to! Above you seem to wish to claim that abuse
    > is when your spouse cheats on you. No so. I admit that such a thing
    > sucks big time but it's not, by law, considered abuse nor anywhere close
    > to a "battered spouse".
    >
    > >> If cheating spouses were counted as mental abuse, the courts would be
    > >> full of these spouseal abuse cases.
    > >> If I'm in a normal situation then the story would be totally
    > >> different, at least I would file for a divorce tomorrow, but because
    > >> of many thing one of them that I cannot go back to my country because
    > >> of the political situation, then I have to think many times before I
    > >> do something maybe I'll regret it in the future, I don't know if all
    > >> that is not considered as mental abuse!
    > >
    > While you are an immigrant and there are additional considerations that
    > you should think about before acting, this does not change what spousal
    > abuse is or is not. If you have a political situation in your home
    > country and are afraid to return there then that's an asylum case not a
    > spousal abuse case. Seems to me like you're trying to use the spousal
    > abuse claim as a crutch in an attempt to stay here. If that it truly the
    > case then I hope your efforts fail because to me that's abusing the
    > system. (If you have true abuse then that's OK but you seem to be trying
    > to claim abuse where none is really present).
    >
    > And, I'm not sure why you care to play the "abuse card" or the "asylum
    > card". Why not simply immigrate based on the merit of your current
    > status? I believe you should be able to self-petition so do so! Or are
    > there perhaps some other things in your situation that you are not
    > letting on to?

Andrew,
Thank you for your response.

I'm not trying to play the asylum card, I'm just trying to know more
about the options that I have, I just don't know the law, and that's
why I'm here.

How amI trying to abuse the system while I have all legal documents
that shows that my marriage was entered in a good faith.

Yes I want to stay in this country, but I'm not trying to use the
spousal abuse claim as a way to stay here, I'm just telling facts
about my situation and asking if that is considered as a battered
spouse, especially when you search the web for the meaning of
"battered spouse" and all what I could find is information about
battered wives!

Justice

mtravelkay <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected] .com>...
    > Justice wrote:
    > >
    > >>
    > >>What do you mean "mostly it is my baby"?
    > >
    > > I meant mostly I'm the father of the baby
    >
    > That was the question. How are you "mostly" the father?
    > Either you fully fathered the child or you didn't.

Well, when I feel that my wife is cheating on me, them how can I be
%100 sure that I'm the father of the child!

Mtravelkay

Justice wrote:
    > mtravelkay <[email protected]> wrote in message news:<[email protected] .com>...
    >
    >>Justice wrote:
    >>>>What do you mean "mostly it is my baby"?
    >>>I meant mostly I'm the father of the baby
    >>That was the question. How are you "mostly" the father?
    >>Either you fully fathered the child or you didn't.
    >
    >
    > Well, when I feel that my wife is cheating on me, them how can I be
    > %100 sure that I'm the father of the child!

Then how can you say "mostly"
You "feel" she is cheating? Early you said you knew and had evidence.

Leslie

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
bat·ter·y ( P ) Pronunciation Key (bt-r)
n. pl. bat·ter·ies

a. The act of beating or pounding.
b. (Law) The unlawful and unwanted touching or striking of one person by another, with the intention of bringing about a harmful or offensive contact.

battery

\Bat"ter*y\, n.; pl. Batteries. [F. batterie, fr. battre. See Batter, v. t.] 1. The act of battering or beating.

2. (Law) The unlawful beating of another. It includes every willful, angry and violent, or negligent touching of another's person or clothes, or anything attached to his person or held by him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To the OP:

Did she beat or pound you? If not, you probably weren't battered. Mental abuse is very unpleasant but it is not a "battery". Battery really does refer to a physical act.

Your original question was.........

"Is that enough evidence to file as a battered spouse?"

Maybe you should be asking about "abuse" instead of "battery".

AGUILA

Many people call that waiver the battered spouse waiver, but in reality is the battery (physical abuse) or extreme mental cruelty (mental abuse) waiver... In his case it would be extreme menta cruelty, please note that mental abuse is much worse than battery since physical abuse the abused person can recover quickly, however, mental abuse might last even a lifetime, and its hard to heal.