You know your a true Scot if ............
 

You know you are a true Scot if...........
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>1. Ye can properly pronounce McConnochie, Ecclefechan, Milngavie,
>Sauchiehall St, St Enoch, Auchtermuchty and Aufurfuksake.
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>2. Ye actually like deep fried battered pizza fae the chippie.
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>3. Yer used tae four seasons in wan day.
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>4. Ye canna pass a chip/kebab shop withoot sleverin when yer blootert.
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>5. Ye kin fall about pished withoot spilling yer drink.
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>6. Ye see people wearin shell suits with burberry accessories -
pureclass!
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>7. Ye measure distance in minutes.
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>8. Ye kin understaun Rab C Nesbitt and know characters just like him,
>in yer ain family.
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>9. Ye go tae Saltcoats cos ye think it is like gaun tae the ocean.
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>10. Ye kin make hael sentences jist wae sweer wurds.
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>11. Ye know whit haggis is made ae and stull like eating it.
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>12. Somedy ye know his used a fitba schedule tae plan thur wedding day
>date.
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>13. You've been at a wedding and fitba scores are announced in the
Church.
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>14. Ye urny surprised tae find curries, pizzas, kebabs, fish n chips,
>iron-bru, fags and nappies all in the wan shop.
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>15. Yer holiday home at the seaside has calor gas under it.
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>16. Ye know irn-bru is a hangover cure.
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>17. Ye learnt tae sweer afore ye learnt tae dae sums.
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>18. Ye actually understand this and yurr gonnae send it tae yer pals .
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>19. Finally, you are 100% Scot if you have ever said/heard these
>words:-
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>
>how's it hingin
>boggin
>cludgie
>pished
>get it up ye
>wee beasties
>erse bandit
>away an bile yer heid
>peely-wally
>humphey backit
>Ba'-heid
>Mocket
>Mingin
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>
>A wee Glesga wumman goes intae a butchershop, where the butcher has
>just came oot the freezer, and is standing haunds ahint his back, with
>his erse aimed at an electric fire. The wee wumman checks oot the
>display case then asks, "Is that yer Ayrshire bacon?" "Naw," replies
>the butcher. "It's jist ma haun's ah'm heatin'.
>

Re: You know your a true Scot if ............
 

LOL..........You forgot Drymen!!!:)

Re: You know your a true Scot if ............
 

Yip I understood them all

I am a true Scotsman anyway, wearing the auld skirt and going commando and all that !!! :thumbup:

Eddie

Re: You know your a true Scot if ............
 

Prove it. ;)

Re: You know your a true Scot if ............
 

Cant HWP

I dont have any pickes to prove it or else I would post one, at the expense of getting into trouble with the mods

;) ;) back

and it will be :ohmy: god :ohmy: god !!!! if ye saw me going commando !!! :p

Eddie

Re: You know your a true Scot if ............
 

A wee quote......Aye Right!.........:-)

Re: You know your a true Scot if ............
 

Oh my god..... i'm from essex... lived in east ayrshire obviously far too long. I understood it ans my kids speak it!!!!! forwarding it to my pals up here now.... Thanks for the laugh....

Re: You know your a true Scot if ............
 

;) Glasgow Teachers are known to use the following Translations for remarks they make on pupils report cards.

''A born leader''-Runs a Protection racket

''Easygoing'' Bone Idle

''Good Progress''-you should have seen him last year

''Friendly''-never shuts up

''Helpful''-A creep

''Reliiable-Informs on his friends

''Expresses himself confidently''-Impertinent

''Enjoys physical education''-A bully

''does not accept Authority easily''-Dad in prison

''Often appears Tired''-stays up all night watching TV

''A Rather solitary child''-He smells

''Ppoular in the playground''-Sells Pornography:D :D :D