What is the hardest bit???
 

Right - got yr attention :D

Just wondered what the hardest bit of all this migration lark is :blink:

Do you think its the "waiting to know" stages ?

or


is it the "saying goodbye" stage



or finally the " we are here - but need to settle " stage.

I just wondered because we are still waiting - and that seems really hard, but from seeing what some of you are going through the waiting bit does not seem so bad really.

Have a great day

PS anybody fancy sorting out a date and time for us all to meet in the chat room over a pizza and a glass of something :thumbsup:

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Good question WDW.

The waiting is hard but you can live with it.

The goodbyes I am dreading.:(

I have already had a few weepy moments. Yesterday I was looking after my only niece om my own side of the family. In the afternoon I put her to bed and my Gran went with us, as she has just progressed from a cot, niece not Gran:eek:

When I was lying there wathcing the two of them I started to think that when I go I probably wont see my wee Gran ever again, she is 92 and her health is bad and my beloved niece will probably forget all about me.

She watched me crying and then lifted her wee finger and touched the tear on my cheek and then snuggled up to me and put her wee arm around my neck - she is only two but a wee sweetie. At this point I had to get out of the bed as I didnt want to bawl in front of her.

I have already told all the family they aren't coming to theairport, but OH Mum doesn't agree with this, so I don't know what will happen.

What do you plan for the airport?:confused:

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

My wife has decided she wants her parents to come over with us at first, to help looking after the children and stuff like that - then when we are settled, we can all have some time together to enjoy the area, then see them off at the airport.:(

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

I take it from the :( you aren't on for this.

It's funny as my MIL has also suggested this, but we have told her it is something we want to do for ourselves as we wil be left on our own anyway and then her going home will be harder for us, let her down gently:blink:

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

The hardest bit for us has been these last few weeks before we go - the boot fairs, ebaying, sorting out, last minute decorating, packing, the constant phoning round and sending letters to utilities, banks, etc and the constant list writing!!!

Top tip re the airport and not wanting rellies to send you off - we are going up the night before to Heathrow and staying in a hotel as that way we are not at the whims of the M25 and in a panic about getting to Heathrow! It also means that its not really practical for the folks to come and 'see us off'. Its not that I don't want them there but we will probably end up getting there late as my mum always has to be last out of the house as she just has one more load of washing to hang out before we go anywhere and I just could not handle being late for check-in!!! :D Also in this day and age the bit at Heathrow where family can see you off is so small and crowded, plus once you get there you need to go through to departures pretty much straight away anyway.

Flossie

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

The most stressful bit was the admin and general sorting out in those last couple of days - the shippers have been and gone - you've got about 6 suitcases lying around, and there is still so much c**p to get rid of. Where did it all come from? Where can I dump it, who can I give it to, who wants this stuff? - odd things, like an iron, a hula hoop, a floor brush, a bottle of Baileys!

Emotionally, I got my most upset about two weeks before we left as various mums at school came to speak to me and wish us all well etc. Strange, as these are not the people I am closest too really - but they obviously hit me on a weak week (!) and were being just so damn nice.

And the hardest bit for my hubby was saying goodbye to his parents and brothers. They dropped us off at the airport hotel the night before, and we were so choked up we could not swallow the champagne we had brought!! (God I hate waste, especially alcohol :p). We muddled through to the morning, bolstered each other up and set off to the airport. All was going well till his dad phoned him on his mobile as we were walking to the gate - his dad was crying - and that was it. Absolutely the worst moment :( I felt like the devil incarnate, dragging my poor husband to the other side of the world.

It took hubby about three days to recover from the guilt/upset/general unease etc. Sometimes the excitement you feel you ought to be experiencing gets quashed by lots of other thoughts and emotions - we found it hard to go skipping off into the sunset, but we did saunter through Calgary airport full of good expectations :thumbup:

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

I said my goodbyes 4 years ago and it was hard. I stay in constant contact with all my family and friends, which is a great help! I use a web cam to keep in touch, which is great!! Not only do you get to talk to everyone, but you SEE them too!! :D

Right now, I am going through the waiting stage (common-law/ spousal application for PR) I think this is driving me crazy the most...not knowing what is happening and when it will come through!!! :blink:

Don't think of settling in a new place as something to worry about! Think of it as an ADVENTURE!!! New places to see and explore, new people to meet!! It's great!! :eek:

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

[QUOTE=WelshDragonsWales;5283563]Right - got yr attention :D

Just wondered what the hardest bit of all this migration lark is :blink:


I thought the waiting bit was hard. :confused:
BUT now we are at the saying goodbye bit and it turning into a free-for-all. Between those who are dividing up our possession for themselves, :curse:the guilt tripping and the friends and relatives who want to spend every waking (even sleeping) moments with us, I still have everything to sort out. AND the visa hasn't arrived yet, and the house sale hasn't completed. :thumbdown:
We have already been booked for 2 parties and numerous nights out!
So the next fews week will be alcohol laden and sleep deprived.:eek:
I have banned all from following us the the airport, because I know I am going to cry for at least half the flight out. What will customs think when we land. :o

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Seems like to goodbyes are so hard. Ann - even yr reply made me cry :( god knows how i will cope.

It had crossed my mind to ask mum and dad if they would like to come out with us for a few weeks - but i just don't know what would be best.

All i know for sure is this .......................


I AM SURE GOING TO :cry

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

In my opinion the hardest part is yet to come

For all those except the ones that have gone to SouthWestern BC

The hardest part will be getting through your first winter, It's this that sends so many back home, and gives rise for the desire of Canadian experience by employers

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Getting clearance from the Ecuadorian police.

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

That's OK - you are allowed ;) "enjoy" it - it releases all sorts of chemicals that will make you feel better afterwards - honest

In the meantime, if you are worrying about it all at this early stage, you'll be bored with the idea by the time you get round to it. Don't dwell on what might be hard - enjoy your time with family now, get out and about and visit places - and eventually, it will all come together and you will be here. The vino will be open and breathing for you ! :thumbup:

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Thanks Ann

Will take on board what you say .................... and i am sure looking forward to the Vino :thumbsup:

have a great day

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

well i have planed a good bye party and told everybody if they cry the have to pay a pound into a jar i get to make some money before i go but that way i dont cry.
oh says he dont want a party and his family say they won't come they want a family good bye i think that will be harder
but i think the hardest part is listing to oh ask are we going yet
only 80 days 9 hours 45 min 61 seconds

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Its living it, when you get here. Setting up a new life isnt easy.

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

lol

I like action so I vote for the waiting stage. It was very frustrating just not knowing how long it was all going to take, whether the rules would be changed during the wait, etc.

Saying goodbye was hard - there is at least one close family member I'll probably never see again - but being a fatalist I reckon I could be run down by a bus anytime I step out of the house.

Settling in has been easy. Not because everything came easily to us or because it has been a laugh a minute, but because it was in our control. It is life. We stand or fall by our own experiences and mistakes and take responsibility rather than being at the mercy of the whim of some politician or bureaucrat.

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Physically draining is the final months when you have to start getting rid of some/most belongings, plus all the paperwork and utilities companies you have to contact.

Emotionally draining is first of all keeping 'the big secret', but worst of all is saying farewell to everyone. Of course it clashes at the same time as you are exhausted from months of running around organising everything. :eek:

My advice is go to the airport without family or friends waving goodbye. Once we landed, we felt spiritually 'lifted' and settled in very easily despite not knowing a soul in Nova Scotia. :D

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

When we were going through the process, I seem to remember thinking that each and every stage was THE HARDEST, but looking back I suppose that they are all difficult in different ways.

After we landed I had to cope with leaving the family here, and sorting out the packers and selling the house on my own. My parents were a tremendous support for me then.

Then when I eventually left UK (with the dog) to rejoin my clan here, it was with very mixed feelings. The sorrow at leaving my parents sort of cancelled out the happiness at the thought of being back with OH and kids, so that was weird. I think I was pretty well exhausted by then, on reflection.

Then when I got here, I was, .... not really homesick, but got very lonely cos family was at school/work, and I was home alone a lot, and feeling completely alien in a strange land.

I seem to remember feeling suddenly at home by about April/May, ie 7-8 months after arrival! Then I had a bad patch with lots of stuff going wrong last summer.

This summer has been a lot better all round.

What's the hardest bit? Lord knows really,..... in my life you just stagger from crisis to crisis, but rollercoasters are fun in a masochistic sort of way!! :p :rofl:

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

After thirty years, my worst day as an expat, and I would say the worst day of my life so far, was the day my father died in South Africa.

We'd just moved from Calgary to Houston. We were still unpacking, and our 14 and 11-year-old kids were just getting into school there. My husband had to do a lot of overseas travel for his work, and we did not yet have any friends whom we could have asked to look after our kids.

There was no way I could leave my kids and fly back for my father's funeral. Being cut off from my family of origin at a time like that really hurt.

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

No, the :( was the thought of what it would be like at the airport, saying our final goodbye's

Good points on staying the night before the flight at a Hotel - we always do this when flying, but hadn't thought of it for when we go for good!

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

At the time of going through the waiting game we thought it was tough and then came the run up to leaving the UK and thoroughly agree it's hard getting everything closed down etc. We were dreading the goodbye's and went through the 'shall we, shall we not have a farewell party, which we knew we would regret if we didn't once we were in Canada. Admittedly had plenty of dutch courage beforehand but we had a wonderful evening and it did narrow down the pain of saying our farewell's and as selfish as it were, we were going to the airport alone, after all this is the start of a new adventure in life and what would our children think seeing us in tears, some adventure this will be!

We have both said we had really mixed feelings on the plane, leaving behind our former lives in the UK and unsure of what lay ahead but having been here for nearly 2 years we both feel that the hardest part was those first few weeks in Canada, admittedly we arrived mid Jan (which was not ideal but we had to land before March and our house sale held us up) but here we were in a new country barely knowing a soul, no job to got to on Mon morning, no familiar faces to say hi to when we first took the boys to school, we just took one day at a time, didn't beat ourslves up as we knew we would get everything in place just given a little time and patience and hey presto it does turn around and we are so proud of what we have done as I am sure others are, in a small timeframe.

So I guess for us the hardest bit was the first few weeks in Canada but get beyond that and the dream really comes to life!!!!!!!

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Bagsy the baileys!

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

For me, the "logistical" side of things was a doddle. I had CIC on my side, so the SW visa application took only a couple of months. I was already shacked up with Souvette and she was being moved back by the government, so there was next to nothing for us to do. She had a job lined up, and a house. Bank accounts, credit cards etc were already in place. Our joint social circle was the people we worked with at the CHC, so that goodbye was easy. My family goodbye was done a couple of weeks before we left. Come the day, we simply left the keys on the dining table (fully furnished High Commission house), shut the door and jumped into a cab to Heathrow. Our new car was waiting for us at the airport in TO. Hotels were lined up for us for the month or so until the container showed up and the Boy was already in Canada, having spent the Summer with his dad in Quebec. We thus had a few weeks free to deal with the minor things like buying appliances, computers, dog, and getting the various SIN, OHIP stuff sorted. It doesn't get much simpler than that.

The hard bits?

1) Watching the tarmac disappear below you and realising that you have a one-way ticket.

2) Saying goodbye to my little boy from my first marriage. I felt like a total bastard and was choked. Fortunately, that one has worked out OK. I go to see him; he comes to see me (he can now travel by himself, which makes things far less complicated).

3) Trying to find Marmite and Fuller's.

Re: What is the hardest bit???
 

Yes. My OH has 2 daughters who live with their mother in Surrey and he will feel the same when the time comes.

He has contact alternate weekends but she defies the court order and won't let them stay overnight with us, and to avoid making things even worse, we've let it go.

Right now though it's the WAIT......