Pica

Wonderful thread-convinces me that I'm so right NOT to have any more dogs..ever, ever again.We do have 3 cats though-only one is a problem but he's a boy so that explains everything.

Atlantic Xpat

This fella...in whom's mouth, butter would not melt, I'm sure you'd agree judging by the photo...has been with us since December when we rehomed him from the SPCA. In that time he's escaped the backyard numerous times, become a nuisance barker resulting in visits from the town enforcement officers and a threat (since detracted) of violence from a neighbour, eaten sundry things he shouldn't have, including poo from the cats litter tray and is a general PITA who requires a lot of training.

He's a good looking, affectionate dog, but has me seriously questioning whether dog ownership is worthwhile.....

ponylife

My lovely lovely lurcher clawed and knawed through a bedroom door and then half way through the front door before giving up and jumping out of a 2nd floor window onto the high street, he trotted across the road and into the pub, I was only in Tesco! Gotta love separation anxiety, which is now thankfully much better!

Also had a special needs TB chestnut mare who used to throw herself on the floor when she decided she had had enough of what ever was going on. Also when she was bored of being lunged she would turn in and run directly at me, thankfully she always stopped but I never waited for the day she didn't and used 2 lines to long line her, just incase!

Life is so much more 'fun' with animals

bats

My cat led the pet's escape party from a friend's house. We were staying with them and our cat wasn't impressed by having to stay indoors so she climbed up the mud room wall, pulled out a loose plank and scarpered through the woodshed. The other cats followed. Damn immigrants not following local customs.

Piff Poff

Daisy is just, well, she's just in a Daze. Henry, he used to do the whole Andrex Puppy thing with the toilet rolls, he did eat some dry wall.

He did escape once without me knowing, I had gone for a shower and Henry was in the backyard (fenced). A neighbour on the opposite crescent whom I hadn't actually met before was banging on the door. "Your dog, the big black fluffy one, is running down the road" After checking the yard, I threw some clothes on, whilst calling my husband from work, went running after him. He was about 2 miles away, absolutely terrified of the Hot air balloon that had appeared in the sky, to this day, Hot Air Balloons are his nemesis, he needs to protect us from these orbs that just appear - even if they are on the distant horizon.

Stinkypup

Stinky was always a scavenger of all things disgusting-even what he himself produced although this was typically modified and frozen so he ended up going out for a wee and then digging up one of his poopsicles..... He was doing this first time we met him as a six-week-old and sadly never changed -perhaps we should have chosen more wisely. I think that he became the most ill when he consumed a pile of what I think was fox poo which looks definitely sourced from a very sick fox

His predecessors, two female golden retrievers were generally more genteel although I do remember one day walking up above the hills near Rochdale with them up a deep ravine -they went ahead and delightfully managed to locate where someone had used a bush as a toilet and both of them avidly tucked in.

Even to this day, I remember leading them both, now in disgrace down the stream, trying to get them to drink from the stream to try and wash their mouths out, then getting in the car and driving along with all four windows down, retching back to the house. I then got a couple of old toothbrushes and scrubbed their teeth as the bile was rising - this smell was only exceeded when the older of the two once rolled in deer shit and I don't think that I have ever smelt anything so disgusting which permeated the house for the next couple of weeks despite repeated scrubbing and disinfecting.

ann m

Smudge, who died in January, was a cute ball of pure pain in the arse. He was very intelligent and quick to learn but as stubborn as they come.

Chewed the corners of rugs;
Chewed/sucked the corners of cushions;
Ate shoes, bloody great chunks of leather missing, and straps on sandals devoured;
Slept with his nose in slippers;
Andrex puppy'd too many loo rolls to count;
Chewed through countless pairs of the kid's underwear, and would go nosing through the laundry on the rare occasions the stuff actally got picked up off their bedroom floor; we called him a perve.
And like so many others, rolled in anything disgusting, and ate anyone's poop;
In his last years he was on steroids a lot and he ate anything, I think he was constantly hungry.
Honestly, they are disgusting creatures and we love 'em to bits.

I'm now left with our dozy spaniel, who would cuddle you to death, but god, she's pretty stupid.

Yorkiechef

Black lab lurcher cross, could clear the 5ft fence in a single bound, ran through cats and instantly killed them every time. At the beach would swim out to sea until you could just see the pin head of black, away for hours, completely unable to house train her. Mad as a box of frogs...was a rescue dog...I wonder why...after two years of agony, she went back to the kennel we got her from. Life in Cyprus eh!

raindropsandroses

Ye Gods some of these are revolting! I am thanking my lucky stars that despite his foibles Fluffy is not remotely food orientated so hasn't eaten anything nasty. He would like to eat our neighbour though, and said neighbour is a vomit inducing specimen of a human being so I guess that counts.

mikelincs

Only really had two dogs that caused problems, one took advantage of us being out for the afternoon to snaffle a huge cone of crochet cotton and chase all over the house with it, think some 200m of cotton around the furniture etc, and the resulting taffle was incredible, we did try to undo it, but after 6 months of trying in our spare time we just gave up and binned the lot. the other dog was an escapologist, and could squeeze between our garage and next door's and get into the next street, she was also the one that decided to have the pups (we knew she was having them) on the spare bed, we were told that dogs like peace and quiet to give birth, so we weren't really expecting her to produce on the bed, where there was another dog as well, and the computer was on playing quite loud music, the first we knew was the cry of the first puppy.

moneypenny20

Left our quite young Blue Tongued Lizard on the sofa whilst I went to the kitchen, came back and found half the buttons on the tv remote were no more. She'd hadn't swallowed them thankfully but the remote was buggered.

Souvy

My cat has her own way of reminding me that her litter box needs cleaning or that I'm 10 minutes late feeding her. She takes a dump on the bed (always on my side).

bats

Another cat of ours likes to eat - anything. Poop scooping I saw a long flat pale thing, eek! Is it a worm? An unpleasantly closer look showed that the worm had writing on it, the elastic from a bunch of broccoli.

Souvy

Mine likes to eat grass. When I see her doing it, I get the kitchen towels and Fantastic out because I know I'll be seeing that grass again somewhere indoors.

raindropsandroses

I've just thought of something annoying which FluffPup does, it was tricky because I adore him and tend to thin the sun shines out of his rear, and its not something which annoys me but my husband

In the evenings husband and I sit on the sectional sofa, each at one end with our feet up. Fluff lies on the floor next to me with his head resting in my lap, facing me so that we can gaze adoringly at each other . My husband then has to perform a mission impossible type move to get off the sofa if he wants to as Fluff's bulk stretches top far and he has selective hearing when my husband asks him to do things.

That's one other point of disagreement between the two, Fluff is immediately and immaculately obedient every time to my every whim if its me asking him, however he ignores my husband whenever possible, and when he finally does do as asked he has a facial expression along the lines of "I hope you realise what a favour I'm doing you by obeying, you owe me one".

He loves winding my husband up, and he's pretty good at it. We use washing up bowls for this food and water bowls, and if I'm annoyed with my husband Fluff will go and get husbands socks or shoes, or on one occasion his cell phone (!!!) and dump them in his water bowl.

Good job my husband loves Fluff really!