spouse of scouse

What Paul said so well

I reckon a stroppy Siouxie would still be nicer than a lot of people. I was going to suggest getting a punching bag, but that might be a bit much for now. Maybe a dart board, you could stick up a photo of someone who gives you the irrates and see if you can get a dart in each eye

I hope your blood pressure's behaving itself and you have a lovely, peaceful day xx

mikelincs

+1

MillieF

If anyone is capable of Googling this to find out how very normal a bit of grumpiness is after something big, it's you Siouxie. Your natural enthusiasm and curiosity will soon rise to the surface again - it's part of your fabric, you will find your level soon.

I was thinking that in days of yore when we moved abroad, it was the long awaited letter or occasional phone call that let us know that others cared for us, if indeed we had family, now in the world of cyberspace, we Do get to know bits about each other over the years, and there a number of long time regulars who I care very much about on BE and feel that I 'know' - probably better than the people I sit next to at work. There have been times in the past when the support of BE has kept me 'just about' on the straight and narrow - very much so you Siouxie - so thank you!

BEVS

That's a lovely post Millie. It is exactly what BE is about.
Care, share, help, support, smile.

Siouxie

I just want to repeat what I said in the 'kindness of strangers' thread..

I have been the very fortunate recipient of the kindness of strangers - or, should I say 'virtual acquaintances and friends..

I am overwhelmed with the generosity that has been extended to me.. truly, completely overwhelmed by the outpouring of love. In this day and age - for people who haven't met me to reach out and make sure that I don't have to worry about money for a month, just bought tears to my eyes and a warm fuzzy feeling all over.

How can I ever say thank you to all those / you wonderful people... please know that I appreciate your kindness, thoughtfulness and generosity and wish I could thank each and every one of you in person.

Much love to you all... thank you so very much ... xxx to me, you are all family - my BE family xxx

Siouxie

Today 25th March is my 1 year Stroke-versary!

What a difference a year makes.....

Lost 50lb
Lost my luscious dark locks
Lost the switch that controls my emotions (now I get irritated or upset very easily)
Lost my smoking habit
Lost the ability to eat what ever I want, when ever I want!

Gained!!!

My 20 something figure back
A new wardrobe worth of clothes - because nothing fits me any more, lol - but I dug out some jeans I bought in the UK 30 years ago, and they fit me - as does the tassled suede waistcoat that I bought when I was 16 - WTG!!!
Blondish hair ok, it's to hide the silver/white streaks that I gained from the stroke, but it looks pretty good even if I say that myself
Some new friends
Vulnerability and letting myself be vulnerable
Crows feet

An even greater understanding of mental health and wellness
More insight into health matters generally

The ability to talk to perfect strangers, even in a supermarket
An overwhelming joy of being alive
An appreciation for the simple things in life...
A sunny day.... blue sky.... my dog curling up with me.... a really good salad ( ) ... non-alcohol beer... dark chocolate (when you haven't had any for nearly a year, it tastes damn good!)



What a difference a year makes........ hope I get to say that next year too!

BuckinghamshireBoy

Yay, good on you!

Shard

WTG Siouxie ! It must have been a difficult year, but your resilience shines through. Dark chocolate is always yummy, by the way, once you switch, milk chocolate is sickly sweet. Glad that you are appreciating each day, we should all do that.

caretaker

+1!

Siouxie

I don't think I've ever given a proper update, if I have then please forgive me, I've become a bit of a repeater, lol.. brain glitch or brain damage, not sure which!

What is scary is that it started with a severe headache.. and a fuzzy brain where I couldn't think straight, couldn't remember how to do something as simple as sending an email, went to bed, got up the next day, still with a headache and light hurt my eyes.. I was persuaded to go to the hospital - in an ambulance - where they told me that I had suffered a major stroke and they kept me in before transferring me to the Acute Stroke Unit.

Spending 9 days in the Acute Stroke Unit gave me insight though - some of the other patients had strokes that were the size of a tooney and couldn't stand, walk, move their arms, talk, understand English, swallow without choking. The size of the stroke and damaged area that I have is the size of my hand. They told me I was 5mm (under a 1/4 of an inch) from being dead or a vegetable. Scary.

The stroke did a good number on me but the brain swelling and subsequent haematoma and slight brain bleed caused more.. they are still not sure how I managed to not just survive it but survive it without physical disability or loss of cognitive ability. I really was blessed, incredibly fortunate - and very, very thankful!

I still see a Neurologist and will have to do so for life. He tells me that there's an 86% chance of me having a subsequent major stroke or a heart attack - which as he puts it - I may not be so lucky in recovering from; or being disabled or 6ft under, within in the next 4 years., particularly when my family history is taken into consideration, together with the diagnosis of familial hypercholesterolemia. I'm planning on being in the other 14% and living long!

I also still see a Vascular Surgeon, who tells me that they won't operate on my carotids nor sub clavicle arteries (which range from 70% to 100% blocked, some with blood clots) unless I have secondary symptoms such as loss of sensation or pain in any limbs. or have some sign of impending stroke. My left side is super sensitive to heat, cold and pain, but other than that I'm good.. they think there's more risk involved in operating than in not. I think it might be a Canada thing though, as someone I work with told me their 85 year old father just underwent similar surgery without any issue.

I now also have to see a Cardiologist and have to have echocardiogram's fairly regularly as after wearing a halter 24/7 for a month they have determined that I have some heart issues as well, which isn't really surprising.


Onwards and Upwards!!!

scrubbedexpat091

I hadn't realized its been a year, seems you have had a fairly good recovery, glad things seem to be doing okay for you, and I am sure you cant beat the odds

Oink

Fantastic news. It seems like you're doing the right thing giving up the fags and cutting out crap food. That's great on the weight loss, you're going to enjoy summer.

BEVS

Lovely update Siouxie.
A hard year with many ups and downs but as you say, always look at the sky ,not down at the pavement.

Well done you.

MillieF

A great big well done from me too...you have had a hell of a time but I'm not in the slightest bit suprised that you've done so well...you're too stubborn and tenacious to let anything get the better of you You are a life force and an inspiration to very many of us on here...biggest of hugs xox

ScotinCanada