Cheesy Joke Thread

Old Jul 5th 2006, 1:18 pm
  #31  
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Default Re: Cheesy Joke Thread

Originally Posted by Voyager970
Here Toontje

Where the ***** have you been

Haven't seen you on here in ages

Welcome back man !!!!!!

Eddie
The Lounge, USA, Trailer Park and the Barbie. Basically you'll find me where the fun is to be had and now the ML has opened I thought I'd stick my nose in here.

Seems like ages that we spoke to each other. I got married back in January and got my visa for the USA in April. I'm living in Texas now and I love it.

How are you doing mate?
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Old Jul 5th 2006, 1:38 pm
  #32  
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Default Re: Cheesy Joke Thread

Originally Posted by Toontje
The Lounge, USA, Trailer Park and the Barbie. Basically you'll find me where the fun is to be had and now the ML has opened I thought I'd stick my nose in here.

Seems like ages that we spoke to each other. I got married back in January and got my visa for the USA in April. I'm living in Texas now and I love it.

How are you doing mate?
Not to bad

Still hanging around here like a bad smell

Went out to Canada in May this year and got myself a job in Stratford, Ontario, hope to start at the end of August, beats waiting 3 years for PR to come through, so waiting on the house to be sold and then I'm off, out of here, astalavista from the UK

Wow has it been that long since you last frequented our shores here

Texas, dont tell me you wear cowboy boots and the ten gallon hat, and drive a ***** off cadilac with bull horns stuck on the front of it !!!

Heres hoping you hang about some more, your humour is good

Eddie
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Old Jul 5th 2006, 2:11 pm
  #33  
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Default Re: Cheesy Joke Thread

Originally Posted by Voyager970
Not to bad

Still hanging around here like a bad smell

Went out to Canada in May this year and got myself a job in Stratford, Ontario, hope to start at the end of August, beats waiting 3 years for PR to come through, so waiting on the house to be sold and then I'm off, out of here, astalavista from the UK

Wow has it been that long since you last frequented our shores here

Texas, dont tell me you wear cowboy boots and the ten gallon hat, and drive a ***** off cadilac with bull horns stuck on the front of it !!!

Heres hoping you hang about some more, your humour is good

Eddie
Nah, I have to find a job first before I nail some longhorns to the hood of a pickup truck.

Some dodgy company offered me a job, gave me training and made it possible for me to get my commercial driving license (for trucks and busses), but I decided that I didn't want to work for them. I only told them that after I got my CDL. Now I'm looking for other jobs that'll take me back on the road. And once I've secured some employment I'll buy myself a car.
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Old Jul 5th 2006, 4:14 pm
  #34  
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Default Re: Cheesy Joke Thread

New Joke (although nice to "see" some old faces on this thread )

A young fellow from Newfoundland moves to Edmonton and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.

The manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?"

The kid says, "Yeah, I was a salesman back home in Newfoundland."

Well, the boss liked the kid so he gave him the job. "You start tomorrow.
I'll come down after we close and see how you did "

His first day on the job was rough but he got through it. After the
store was locked up, the boss came down.

"How many sales did you make today?"

The kid says, "One."

The boss says, "Just one? Our sales people average 20 or 30 sales a day.
You're going to have to improve considerably or look for another job!
How much was the sale for?"

The kid says, "$112,237.64."

The boss says, "$112,237.64! What the hell did you sell?"

Kid says, "First I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fish hook. Then I sold him a larger fish hook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said out at a lake in BC, so I told him he was gonna need a boat, so we went down to the
boat department and I sold him a new bass boat. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that new Ford pick-up. I asked him how
long he was going to be out at the lake and after he said 5 or 6 days I took him down to the RV department and sold him a slide-in camper for the truck."

The boss said, "A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat, a truck and a camper?"

Kid says, "No, he came in here to buy a box of tampons for his wife and I said, 'Well, your weekend's shot, you might as well go fishing."


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Old Jul 7th 2006, 8:26 pm
  #35  
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Default Re: Cheesy Joke Thread

PMSL hahahaha.... I wish I had one as good as that to post.... Oh yeah... where are the Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman jokes? Come on people, those have to be the cheesiest ones around for sure.
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Old Jul 7th 2006, 8:38 pm
  #36  
 
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Default Re: Cheesy Joke Thread

a dyslexic man walks into a bra...
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Old Jul 7th 2006, 11:14 pm
  #37  
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Default Re: Cheesy Joke Thread

One day, JANE met TARZAN in the jungle.
She was very attracted to him and during her questions about his life she asked him how he managed to have sex.
"What's that?" he asked. She explained to him what it was and he said
"Oh, I use a hole in the trunk of a tree."
Horrified, she said, “Tarzan you have it all wrong but I will show you how to do it properly."
She took off her clothes, lay down on the ground and spread her legs.
"Here," she said, "you must put it in here."
Tarzan removed his loin cloth stepped closer and then gave her an almighty kick in the fanny.
Jane rolled around in agony. Eventually she managed to gasp,
"What the hell did you do that for?"
"Just checking for bees," said Tarzan


BOOM BOOM

Eddie
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