The Banes of England and other funny things
#1
Hi all,
Okay so am lucky enough to be a dual citizen of Canada and the UK. I have lived for over 25 years in Alberta (and love it) but right now I am living in Oxfordshire for a year or so. I find myself comparing both countries, cultures etc and obviously there is good and bad in both.
I am thinking of writing a short book with lots if photo's etc of things that annoy me or as I say, "The Banes of Britain." Here is a short list of some ideas I had....please feel free to add to the list but I would be really interested to know what your #1 bane would be....
1) Speed bumps of varying sizes shapes and severity.
2) Having to pay for parking spaces for shops (mall) you are patronising and then to top it off not being able to give your unused time (ticket) to another person because you have to enter your license plate # in the machine (after all I have "paid" for that parking spot and if there is time left on the ticket I feel I have the right to let someone else use the remaining time).
3) Not having the right to use the "toilet" in a government public building as they are for "staff" only yet it is a public building. Plus the absolute disgusting public loos where the doors are falling off, seat is even missing and gross nose pickings on the walls!
4) Road side litter that just spoils the beautiful country side. I can not begin to count the tossed out lucozade bottles and faded crisp packets that litter the road sides.
5) "Safety Camera's" that bring traffic to a crawl (mind you I am sure there are many that are needed for genuine safety such as school zones, old folks residences etc) but I am sure it is a HUGE revenue for the government.
6) Price of fuel at over $8/gallon, yes you read that right. My Honda civic costs close to $100 to fill
(most likely my number one bane).
7) M&S grocery stores in petrol stations!!!!! So you pull up behind someone in front of you who has just completed pumping their gas and then you wait and wait and wait not because the person is waiting in line to pay for their gas but because they are grocery shopping......15 minutes later or so you might be lucky enough to get your gas!
Now a few funnies, well funny to me...please add.
Signs...see my avatar picture. There is a trio of these signs...Humped Toucan, Humped Pelican and Humped |Zebra crossing signs. I am sure visitors to the UK have a chuckle over this and are looking for all these pregnant (or other wise engaged in humping) animals
"Toilet" signs....meaning nothing to the British but seems rather crude for visiting North Americans...but then asking to use the washroom would seem funny to Brits.
"Cock Lane" (in Gloucester).....rather chauvinist don't you think?
Now how about humorous customs and I would love to hear more but this one I found out from my sister. Lets say you run over a deer and kill it by accident. You may have dogs that would love some fresh road kill but the law states that the person who killed the animal can not remove it but, however, the next person coming upon the poor dead animal has the right to remove said animal and dispose of it as seen fit. There has to be many many more, please share.
Cheers
CG
Okay so am lucky enough to be a dual citizen of Canada and the UK. I have lived for over 25 years in Alberta (and love it) but right now I am living in Oxfordshire for a year or so. I find myself comparing both countries, cultures etc and obviously there is good and bad in both.
I am thinking of writing a short book with lots if photo's etc of things that annoy me or as I say, "The Banes of Britain." Here is a short list of some ideas I had....please feel free to add to the list but I would be really interested to know what your #1 bane would be....

1) Speed bumps of varying sizes shapes and severity.
2) Having to pay for parking spaces for shops (mall) you are patronising and then to top it off not being able to give your unused time (ticket) to another person because you have to enter your license plate # in the machine (after all I have "paid" for that parking spot and if there is time left on the ticket I feel I have the right to let someone else use the remaining time).
3) Not having the right to use the "toilet" in a government public building as they are for "staff" only yet it is a public building. Plus the absolute disgusting public loos where the doors are falling off, seat is even missing and gross nose pickings on the walls!
4) Road side litter that just spoils the beautiful country side. I can not begin to count the tossed out lucozade bottles and faded crisp packets that litter the road sides.
5) "Safety Camera's" that bring traffic to a crawl (mind you I am sure there are many that are needed for genuine safety such as school zones, old folks residences etc) but I am sure it is a HUGE revenue for the government.
6) Price of fuel at over $8/gallon, yes you read that right. My Honda civic costs close to $100 to fill
7) M&S grocery stores in petrol stations!!!!! So you pull up behind someone in front of you who has just completed pumping their gas and then you wait and wait and wait not because the person is waiting in line to pay for their gas but because they are grocery shopping......15 minutes later or so you might be lucky enough to get your gas!
Now a few funnies, well funny to me...please add.
Signs...see my avatar picture. There is a trio of these signs...Humped Toucan, Humped Pelican and Humped |Zebra crossing signs. I am sure visitors to the UK have a chuckle over this and are looking for all these pregnant (or other wise engaged in humping) animals

"Toilet" signs....meaning nothing to the British but seems rather crude for visiting North Americans...but then asking to use the washroom would seem funny to Brits.
"Cock Lane" (in Gloucester).....rather chauvinist don't you think?
Now how about humorous customs and I would love to hear more but this one I found out from my sister. Lets say you run over a deer and kill it by accident. You may have dogs that would love some fresh road kill but the law states that the person who killed the animal can not remove it but, however, the next person coming upon the poor dead animal has the right to remove said animal and dispose of it as seen fit. There has to be many many more, please share.
Cheers
CG
#2
BE Enthusiast




Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 449
From: Edmonton, AB






I've never had to enter my license plate in the machine in the places I have parked since living in the UK. A lot of places are now pay on exit which negates the problem you explain.
Tim
Tim
#3
You can pay by mobile phone though which saves change.
#4
But you're still paying to use a store's parking lot!
#6
Personally speaking, I wouldn't buy a book of things that annoy an individual...I get enough of complaining reading forums
#7
Yes, I see your point and agree. My wording was perhaps not my exact intention. My thoughts were to make more of a bathroom book with the funny quirky things that make the UK what it is.
I know in Canada and the US many malls will validate your parking so you do not have to pay but as of yet I have not seen that system in the UK but then each county of city might have its own system.
Please feel free to share any funny, quirky, traditions or things that we all live with in this wonderful country
CG
I know in Canada and the US many malls will validate your parking so you do not have to pay but as of yet I have not seen that system in the UK but then each county of city might have its own system.
Please feel free to share any funny, quirky, traditions or things that we all live with in this wonderful country

CG
Last edited by Canada Goose; Apr 17th 2010 at 8:02 pm.
#8
2) Having to pay for parking spaces for shops (mall) you are patronising and then to top it off not being able to give your unused time (ticket) to another person because you have to enter your license plate # in the machine (after all I have "paid" for that parking spot and if there is time left on the ticket I feel I have the right to let someone else use the remaining time).
#9
Forum Regular



Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 193
From: Calgary








Hi all,
7) M&S grocery stores in petrol stations!!!!! So you pull up behind someone in front of you who has just completed pumping their gas and then you wait and wait and wait not because the person is waiting in line to pay for their gas but because they are grocery shopping......15 minutes later or so you might be lucky enough to get your gas!
7) M&S grocery stores in petrol stations!!!!! So you pull up behind someone in front of you who has just completed pumping their gas and then you wait and wait and wait not because the person is waiting in line to pay for their gas but because they are grocery shopping......15 minutes later or so you might be lucky enough to get your gas!
oh, and not being able to turn through red lights. i know this rule is stupid, but having lived with it for a year... it definitely feels slow when you go home and you're waiting for a light to turn green so you can turn left
#10
Many Ontario petrol stations have had the catch that holds the pump open removed so you have to jam the pump with a wallet or similar. That's cumbersome and inefficient.
#11
Forum Regular



Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 193
From: Calgary








i never knew about that catch until a few weeks ago... it would have saved me from very cold hands a few times this winter
#15
Account Closed










Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 7,284

how about having to go inside to pay at all??? paying at the pump is such a simple and efficient idea
oh, and not being able to turn through red lights. i know this rule is stupid, but having lived with it for a year... it definitely feels slow when you go home and you're waiting for a light to turn green so you can turn left
oh, and not being able to turn through red lights. i know this rule is stupid, but having lived with it for a year... it definitely feels slow when you go home and you're waiting for a light to turn green so you can turn left
Right turns on red lights are ace I agree.



