37100

Have you every been racial abused? We have. Here and in the u.k. And it happened again the other evening. It leaves you totally speechless.
In the u.k it was usually directed at me because I have one fair and one very dark son( he could pass as Morrocan etc). I've been asked what colour my husband was, how could I sleep with a P**i etc.
Here in Verona it's usually directed at my sons. I Veronesi can be very narrow minded. My youngest was physically attacked by a group of youngsters because of his long fair hair. Their parents didn't seem at all 'disturbed' by their behavior. Not long after another boy was killed in the town centre for no reason. My son has now cut his hair and moved away. He is much happier, but it took him along time to get over it.
The other evening my eldest was subjected to a barrage of insults along the lines of the Italian equivalent of 'bloody foreigner, bugger of to you're own country' etc, though far stronger. Speechless, all he could stutter was "I'm Italian". At which his verbal aggressor started calling him "terrone di m.." just because he speaks Italian without a distinct regional accent. My son is a 28 yr old, 6ft judo instructor who although he managed to laugh it off, was still visibly shaken.

duffer

I'm really sad to hear about this but not totally surprised. Italy really is far behind the rest of Western Europe in many ways but especially in terms of racial tolerance, integration and respect.
On a personal level, myself being from an ethnic minority, have never experienced any abuse here in Italy. I do, however, have concerns about my son being brought up amongst such narrow minded people of whom there are many in the Veneto area.

Lorna at Vicenza

Sorry to hear about your and your son's experiences and I agree with Duffer that Italy is totally behind in all racial aspects.

That translation I've just finished was all about counterfeit goods and it was a debate by Milan Uni students.

You'd expect better and more intelligent discussions from young students but I did come across a couple of sentences like "get the marocchini and the coloured people off the beeches and the streets."

silvietta

37100 I'm sorry for what has happened to you and your son. Trust me, not all Italians are racist. You see, there is a fact that I do not approve but I can see it. In Italy there are many problems, most of them linked to the shortness (I hope it is correct) of work. This forces lots of southern people (called "terroni" which comes from "terra" because they are more linked to it rather than northern people who faced industrialization times before) to move to illegality. The same thing, but even worse, happens to strangers coming from Africa and Eastern regions, helped by internal laws that allow anything to anybody. By this way, the perception of illegality is havier towards marocchini and albanians, instead of e.i. Senegal or other countries. I have to say it happens with Communities that have heavy numbers on our population, but I think Italians will need more more time to understand that we have to divide people in "good" and "bad" by what they do, not who they are. I feel really sorry about what happened to you but trust me, there are many people here happy to know you like a place like Italy to live in. And surely you know good people thinking that strangers can be an additional value to our Country.

K in Modena

I'm very sorry to hear about what happened to your sons (and to you, in the UK). I haven't really experienced anything in the way of racial abuse here, but my husband has a bit- he's from Basilicata so has had a few "terrone" insults. I've mostly heard comments about "extracomunitari" and non-white people here. In my former job they came out with some breathtakingly non-pc comments, like referring to all the middle eastern clients as "Talibani". However, at our recent wedding the mayor made a lovely speech about the beauty of different cultures coming together, so it's not all bad.

Lorna at Vicenza

Compliments to your big lad for keeping his cool 37100 instead of decking the little %$&!ers with a few judo moves.

37100

Silvietta, I know not all italians are racist but you won't find many find many italians (at least round here) prepared speak out against it except to say 'but not all Italians are like that'. My youngest suffered serious, long term physical effects, but the parents of one boy in particular, just took the attitude 'that's adolescents for you'.Yes, in the u.k there is too much racism (there will always be a Nick Griffin), but the vast majority of people understand that it is totally unacceptable. BTW my OH is from Turin but is often ask here if he is a 'terrone'.

37100

You are just too shocked to do anything! My youngest fought back when he was attacked, but ended up with a 'denucia'. Apparently you are just supposed to stand there and take it though a police officer did quietly say 'bravo'.

LivingHere

This is a terrible thing to happen - and in his home town too. I have very fair children and I am half Indian and get all the comments about whether they are mine or not. Which I don't mind as they don't look like me. We did have Calabrian neighbours who were very worried about whether my dad was a muslim or not. But I have no direct experience of being racially abused here. The eastern europeans have a lot of problems with the locals but its isn't really in my radar.

37100

Sadly, I have now lost count of the times it has happened more here, than the u.k. but it still leaves me without words. In the u.k I was often asked if my eldest was mine. His is very olive skinned. I can still remember the exact spot I was standing the first time I was asked what colour my oh was. TBH, it was a bit of an eye opener. Verona isn't my sons' home town although my youngest does speak the local dialect.

37100

After more than 15yrs here in Veneto I can completely understand your concerns however, it has made my sons far more open to to people with differences be them physical or mental. My youngest never , ever thought to tell me one of his class mates didn't have fingers or toes. To him it was just a different way of being 'normal' and it was the same for his few immigrant class mates.

indiebird

Oh 37100 I am so sorry to read this. I must admit that on this scale we've had nothing like it, but there are narrow minded people here, who have made loud comments about us not paying our taxes here and therefore not really being entitled to school our kids here or even use the parks but this is mostly narrow-minded small individuals imho. Becuase I am not classic English rose material (as you know ) I often get asked if I'm romanian and when I say 'no, english' most people visibly chill out and are nicer, but not all. Things have got worse in the last year with the recession and the italians seem to think they are the only people going through this. At our language school there are lots of romanians and I do think they get a really hard time here. They are very guarded and dont like us much really at all, but I guess they are right in that not all europeans are treated equal.

casalottian

I used to live in Shepherds bush and could buy a turkey from a halal butcher on christmas day. Every other day I could go to a 24 hour shop, typically managed by, a non-native-english person (whatever the PC alternative for that is) and I loved it. I'd go to the market and you could buy anything from anywhere on earth.

In itally, the only non-europeans that I observe, sell stuff on the beach or clean your windscreen. I saw a black family on holiday at the beach and I hadn't previously noticed how strange it was to see. I don't think I've ever seen a black politician or police officer or anything!

We send our son to an international school and it is a mixture of all races and I'm glad that he will grow up to hardly even notice the race of his friends, but it is certainly an exception. I don't know why that is in Italy.

Mr Posh

I am so sorry about your son and it makes me angry..

But we are foreigner in another country and Un-like the UK that bend over backwards to foreigner Italians are at least 20 years behined and are still rascist.

I am affraid that it is something that we will have to live with, as foreigner did in the UK when they first arrived.

We have been lucky that in Cesena our son has not had any thing like this (some but not like your boys) I did tell him If they start just smack um in the mouth and I will come to the school. I know it's not the right way But they need to know where he stands.

silvietta

Personally I haven't had in my family any of this issue, though we have:
-my uncle coming from England
-my granmother coming from Brazil (her father went there during 1st world war)
-my husband's uncle married with a Kenian woman with whom he had a beatiful child and met her first daughter (she had in a previous relationship) with no trouble.Of course, you'd smile if you'd seen them: him completely white as a ghost/ she completely black as the night / the child a lovely cappuccino color / the daughter completely black (the mother had a relationship with a Watoussi man - black and really tall - the girl is thin and tall 1,70m at 14 years old!) but this is really nice.Of course somebody could ask about this difference, but no problem to say the truth - they are all good people and curiosity is lawful, it is not a prejudice.
My family was lucky to have found always smart people around with no prejudice. My uncle has lived in Italy since 1970 and was always perfectly accepted by all (even if still he has troubles with italian language!).
I guess the first thing to avoid racism is not to think you are different from Italians. If you priorly act like victims, you will always find stupid people treating you bad. I work with many strangers in my Company, no problem. Some of them are stupid, some are not. It depends upon the situation they are coming from, we have 3 brothers coming from Albania. 1 of them should be trashed, the other 2 are really nice people. And it is in the same family.Don't make yourself the error to think all Italians are racist, you are making the first step in the wrong way.Just give Italians the time to know you, then you can say if they behave fine or not. I'm sure you will change your ideas...