Fun
Jan 27th 2011, 3:08 pm
#1
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: May 2010
Location: Close to the wine
Posts: 1,522
Fun
Uk Female Linesman.
Jan 27th 2011, 4:14 pm
#2
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2009
Location: San Maurizio Canavese, Italy
Posts: 3,138
Re: Fun
Hmmmmm didn't someone just get into trouble for being sexist?? 
Jan 27th 2011, 5:00 pm
#5
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2009
Location: San Maurizio Canavese, Italy
Posts: 3,138
Jan 28th 2011, 7:18 am
#8
Pull my finger
Joined: Feb 2007
Location: Vicenza
Posts: 4,064
Re: Fun
boys are fantastic, girls are just spastic
Jan 28th 2011, 7:20 am
#9
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: May 2010
Location: Close to the wine
Posts: 1,522
Jan 28th 2011, 7:34 am
#10
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2009
Location: San Maurizio Canavese, Italy
Posts: 3,138
Jan 28th 2011, 7:59 am
#11
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: May 2010
Location: Close to the wine
Posts: 1,522
Jan 28th 2011, 8:05 am
#12
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,679
Re: Fun
I thought this might be appropriate
DEFINITELY THE BEST E-MAIL OF THE YEAR !!!!!
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
"Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen."
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.
The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the checkbook.
He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.
Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
He ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.
After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed.
At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint.
The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please, let us trade back."
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: "My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were."
You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night!"
ROFLOL!!!!!
Voted Women's Favorite E-mail of the Year
DEFINITELY THE BEST E-MAIL OF THE YEAR !!!!!
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
"Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen."
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.
The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the checkbook.
He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.
Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
He ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.
After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed.
At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint.
The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please, let us trade back."
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: "My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were."
You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night!"
ROFLOL!!!!!
Voted Women's Favorite E-mail of the Year
Jan 28th 2011, 8:13 am
#13
BE Forum Addict
Thread Starter
Joined: May 2010
Location: Close to the wine
Posts: 1,522
Re: Fun
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid
her
pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to
the
bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm
sorry,
your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the
vet..
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any
testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a
few
minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner
looked
on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on
the
examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then
looked up
at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few
minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and
also
delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its
haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this
is
most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a
bill,
which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "£150!" she cried,
"£150
just to tell me my duck is dead!" The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you
had
just taken my word for it, the bill would have been £20, but with the
Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now £150."
her
pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to
the
bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm
sorry,
your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the
vet..
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any
testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a
few
minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner
looked
on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on
the
examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then
looked up
at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few
minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and
also
delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its
haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this
is
most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a
bill,
which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "£150!" she cried,
"£150
just to tell me my duck is dead!" The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you
had
just taken my word for it, the bill would have been £20, but with the
Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now £150."
Jan 28th 2011, 8:42 am
#14
Pull my finger
Joined: Feb 2007
Location: Vicenza
Posts: 4,064
Re: Fun
I thought this might be appropriate
DEFINITELY THE BEST E-MAIL OF THE YEAR !!!!!
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
"Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen."
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.
The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the checkbook.
He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.
Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
He ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.
After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed.
At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint.
The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please, let us trade back."
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: "My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were."
You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night!"
ROFLOL!!!!!
Voted Women's Favorite E-mail of the Year
DEFINITELY THE BEST E-MAIL OF THE YEAR !!!!!
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
"Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen."
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.
The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, awakened the kids, set out their school clothes, fed them breakfast, packed their lunches, drove them to school, came home and picked up the dry cleaning, took it to the cleaners and stopped at the bank to make a deposit, went grocery shopping, then drove home to put away the groceries, paid the bills and balanced the checkbook.
He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.
Then it was already 1 P.M. and he hurried to make the beds, do the laundry, vacuum, dust, and sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
He ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework, then set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing.
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.
After supper, he cleaned the kitchen, ran the dishwasher, folded laundry, bathed the kids, and put them to bed.
At 9 P.M. he was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through without complaint.
The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh please, let us trade back."
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: "My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back to the way they were."
You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night!"
ROFLOL!!!!!
Voted Women's Favorite E-mail of the Year
Jan 28th 2011, 9:21 am
#15
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,679
Re: Fun
I pay the bills ( with OH's money), so what's funny?