loupyloutoo

We started the process of emigration back in 2003 and then I got sick with cervical cancer which ultimately led to a hysterectomy and we were advised at the time not to go any further after passing the ACS application, because my consultant (austarlian bloke) said that they wouldn't let me in with so much uncertainity! Complaications after the hysterectomy meant that I needed a second lot of major surgery performed earlier this year. My husband said that we wouldn't start the process again until I was fully recovered, which I am now...BUT...

All this time has given him the opportunity to rethink and he's decided he doesn't want to go anymore WAAHHHHHHH!!!! I am gutted! He wants to give England another go and we have put the house on the market to move...not to another area for a fresh start, but to buy a house just down the road....

Absolutely GUTTED!!!! SO SAD!!! My folks are out there and I so want to be too! Ach well....

So its goodbye from me, and good luck to all of you applying and waiting. MAY YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE!

TheRossers

Is it worth getting him out there on a holiday just so he can see what he's missing and maybe change his mind again
karma on it's way.

youcanlaugh

Sorry to hear that. Then again, you should never say never. Pester him for long enough, you might persuade him. It worked for me. Took me about 8 years to persuade the wife, but got there in the end!

lynne & steve

We are gutted for you too..
Maybe given a bit of time he might change his mind.
Like The Rossers said try a holiday out there.
You need to relax and stay calm.
We wish you all the best.
Lynne & Steve

robert cowan

so sad i hope you can change his mind go on a holiday there if you can.

this is a post i found a bit a go not to sure about copying it and posting it but it makes for good reading hope i dont offend any one

dolly1
Senior Member


offline


Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 118 Risk !



RISK"

To Laugh is to risk appearing the fool,
To Weep is to risk appearing sentimental,
To reach out for another is to risk involvement,
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self,
To place your ideas, your dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return,
To live is to risk dying,
To hope is to risk despair,
To try is to risk failure,
But risks must be taken, for the greater hazard is to risk nothing,
The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing,
They may avoid suffering and sorrow,
But, they cannot learn, change, grow, love or live.
Chained by their attitude they are a slave, they have forfeited freedom,
Only a person who risks is free.

DOLLY X

Rooksie

dont give up now girl - you can do it - after all, he's only a man!! use your powers of persuasion - he'll be putty in yur hands!!

as above, get him there on holiday - all the very best for your future whatever you decide ultimately

CK2B

Totally feel for you guys, it can't have been an easy decision for hubby either. It could be that when you were so sick he realised the good friends and family he had close by and that he'd miss that if you moved. It's a tough one when you both have family drawing you in different directions.

I really hope it all works out for you but the good thing is you have your health sorted out.

loads of cyber hugs,
CK

CORKER

Use your feminine charm on him.....oh!!!!and stop doing the ironing and house work etc....see how long he lasts....not long I bet..
CORKER

Nicky & Dave

Hi there. Your message struck a chord with me, as we were in a similar situation, and I wanted to tell you our story to show that things CAN change.

My partner's family are all in Australia and the long-term plan had always been that we will emigrate there too. However, we have a very good lifestyle in the UK, and as time moved on, I became less and less certain about emigrating, and saw it more and more as an unacceptable risk. After a holiday in Oz in 2002, I became even more unsure about the whole thing. It would mean leaving my family and the country that I love, selling our home, leaving well-paid jobs - all for what exactly?

Last year, after much soul-searching, I reached the decision that I did not want to leave the UK. Once I had made that choice I knew it was the right one as I felt as though a weight had lifted off my shoulders. This decision did have an effect on our relationship, and last year my partner and I separated.
Ironically a month or so after we had split we had been due to go on holiday to Oz for a month to visit relatives. My partner still went, and the time apart helped us to realise that we did want to work things out, so I decided to fly over to Sydney to spend the last week of the holiday with him and his family.

Whilst I had been very sure that I wouldn't change my mind about emigrating, during the last few days of the holiday something just clicked and I realised that, over the past year, I had competely lost sight of why we had wanted to move to Sydney in the first place. It isn't about what you're giving up, but rather about what is being gained instead. And for whatever the reasons why all of us on this forum have made the decisions to move country, we wouldn't be doing it unless we really beleived that.

The point of all this is really just to say that absolutely DO NOT think this means an end to your dream. People do change their minds. Your husband has made a decision based on how he feels at this point, but given time, he may well feel completely differently. You know your hubbie better than anyone else, so only you can decide the best way to handle this. But you need to be very clear with him just how important this is to you and why, as he, like me, may have lost sight of what this is really all about.

At the end of the day, I know that my partner and I can be happy anywhere we chose to live, and we're now busy preparing our application to lodge at the end of this month. I really hope that you can work things through with your husband, and get yourselves back on track with the move to Oz.

DIMO8

God you have had a tough time girl....but you have got through it and good for you.

As for the Australian problem...just hang in there , we have planned to go 18 monthes ago and hubby said the same thing to me only a few weeks ago ( cold feet) i think, but i have spoken with a few on here and it is quite common especially as the time is becoming nearer to the move.

I am not giving up......its been his dream as well as mine. I will get there someday.

Dont give up on your dream....have a holiday there and maybe relax about immigration for a short while and see what happens

Good luck and keep us posted

D x