Advice svp!!! It had to happen at some point, we are hosting our first apero evening for the neighours and the mayor soon, since moving into our new abode. I am starting to get a few bits in. Any simple advice, without the scaremongering please would be appreciated from those who have done the same? We were just going to leave drinks on on the table for people to help themselves, together with some nibbles etc, as we feel it is important to mingle, rather than spend the evening keep filling up peoples glasses!!!
I think the only concern for us is the language and the "drying up" moment when we maybe cannot be quite as fluent as we would like to be with the whole french conversation
Most we haven't met yet and have sent out an invite, however we have put RSVP on, but have not received replies from anyone, so do I assume this is not the done thing???? If a french person doesn't know RSVP then who does

Hi,
I haven't been at any such French gathering where the drinks were just left on the table. The host has always looked after that.
You should perhaps include a nice whisky as the French all seem to love it.
I have never served a G & T in France but have served Pernod or Ricard.
Do you have a Picard near you? They have great aperos both hot and cold.
The French also like olives and saucisson.
Not sure about sending out invites to those you haven't met - hope that works.
Speaking French for several hours can get very tiring.
I have been at an "apero" evening that lasted 5 hours and the food and drink was offered throughout that time.
I have made/still make social errors in France.
When to kiss / when not to kiss.
When to use tu or vous.
I am a foreigner and the French are usually tolerant of these social errors - they don't always get them right either.
Hope it goes well.

+1 on the drinks table. I'm afraid it's the duty of the host(ess) to offer replenishments. Food can work self-serve without problems though.

I think the trendy French term for a longish evening is un apéro-dîner. These are the 5 hour marathons, which can be fun. Loadsa saussicons and stuff go down a treat.

As cyrian says, best of luck with the RSVP to strangers though.

Bonne chance. (Can I come?)

Novocastrian..more than welcome...at least we will have one person ! I thought as much. Drinks on the table would be an easy life for sure, although was expecting too much I suppose. Yes pastis is definately on the cards, and def not G and T! We were aiming at the 90 minute apero, rather than 5 hours! I may need a dark room if it goes on that long! Are there any other drinks the french may ask for other than vino and pastis? We have had pastis, although not high on our list of must haves. Hot aperos...not sure on that one, although am sure I will come up with something. I am assuming the first meeting is no kissy kissy, but thereafter is acceptable. We have sorted out the tu and vous now! Very hard to know what to do when you don't know how many are coming! Ind the old RSVP thing very odd when it is french!!

It would be rude to leave the drinks on the table although in my experience the host is in charge of alcoholic drinks and everything else falls to the hostess, You must serve everyone and you should offer seats as the French will not sit unless offered the chair so to speak when arriving.

Typically you invite people in person imho stopping to chat is how you get to know them as they rarely respond to written invitations so predicting turn up is impossible. The bizzu at social events is acceptable to unknowns and strangers but you have to look out for the offer as some folk don't go for it. Personally we keep it to sensible numbers as the French can certainly keep up with the English at drinking.

Drinks you will need Rum, Ricard, Rose lots of ice and water pineapple juice apple juice and orange juice in my experience end the evening on a little nipple of Brandy a French one. We also keep Bacardi pina colada mix and pine apple juice in the fridge as you will find that if any 15/16 years olds are coming with their parents they are allowed a weaker alcoholic drink or two.

Apericubes nuts crisps crackers smoke sausage ham etc


As time goes on you will find that it pays to keep basic apero products in the house at all times

It's probably dependent on the region, but around here porto, martini rosso, pommeau, cidre bouché, calvados & as mentioned earlier, an excellent single malt seem very popular.

For the shorter version, you can control the length of the event quite nicely by serving "nibbles" and champagne. They soon get the hint when you stop opening bottles.

All great advice thank you. If we serve saucisson, we normally have that with cheeses, hams etc as a meal but if we are doing a apero nibbles is it OK serve a cheese board, or just saucisson on it's own? I am needing some inspiration on serving suggestions. Also with pastis I have only ever had this with water. I am assuming this is all it is normally served with? I have also had a red wine apero with marron. Are these common drinks too? We are in the Rhone Alpes.

Even though it's very local here in Charente, Pineau de Charentes seems a popular apero all over France. It's about the same strength as a sherry, comes either as red (sweeter) or White (drier) and should be served Cold in smallish wine glasses. A bottle will cost about 12 euros or so in the supermarche for a good one. Don't forget Newcastle Brown for Novo!
Good luck and might I add what a good idea!
Blackie
ps If you are over retirement age you are entitled to say tu to whomsoever you like - even our embattled President

Strangely enough, the French don't realise the meaning of RSVP. You should be aware that your total strangers might turn up with their friends/relatives, so make sure there's enough for 3-4 times the number of invitations, and, yes, the host should stay with the drinks and open the bottles when required, and the guests can "mingle" with him while he serves. There won't be any drying up moment, your neighbours won't expect you to reply after a couple of glasses!
Word of warning: it's up to the host and hostess to firmly signal the end of the party, otherwise the guests will stay forever, expecting dinner. As a matter of interest, it's only new foreign neighbours who throw apéro parties here, if that (we never did, but then OH is French) - new French neighbours never do....
But it's a good way of meeting all the neighbours, and I wish you a pleasant evening!

So far my supermarket list consists of the largest supply of alcohol I have ever seen, and that is depending on how may turn up!
Doesn't the suggestion of "apero" suggest a drink though and a "soiree" a meal? That was always our understanding?
Suggesting the end of the evening...hmm that could be interesting. I think the drying up of drinks is a good plan on that one.
Also, isn't finishing off the evening with a good french brandy more for invitations for dinner? I don't want to be steering a way from an apero evening rather than a full blown soiree.

Have everything cut up in advance, you don't want people fumbling with sharp knives! Saucisson, cubes of hard cheese with toothpicks, cherry tomatoes, olives, gherkins, ..., all on platters. Plenty of serviettes, as only fingers will be used!
I would let Pastis drinkers dose their own! In my area they do marron with white wine, Muscat is also popular with the ladies.
P.S. Missed your last post. There are always people who are prepared to spend the whole evening, whatever the invitation says! You could ask a good neighbour to start a general exodus when you're ready for it (and invite him back to finish all the left-overs after the rest have gone!)

We have been caught out by the not being sure how to turf Apero guests out.

Hi,

I will give you a reply as a true french girl ! (well not 100% french but anyway I know apéros very well)

A great idea is sangria or punch which you put in a large bowl with a ladle. You leave it on the table and it's great, people know what they have to do!

I also love chouquettes salées and would hardly imagine an apéro without a fizzy alcoholic drink (like crémant or champagne).

A kir or kir royal is easy to make.

But you would have to pour the crémant/champagne in the glasses.

However all the soft drinks can be left on the table.

What I always do when I have a big apéro is I usually say "Bonjour X, ça va ? Vous voulez boire quelque chose/Je vous sers quelque chose à boire ?" the person will usually say yes, then you just have to serve the first drink and say "Voilà , n'hésitez pas à vous servir/faites comme chez vous, servez-vous!"

Usually people understand when you say "faites comme chez vous".

I would suggest that you stick to regional nibbles and drinks where possible.
This is what your neighbours would expect.
The saucisson can be served on a dish on its own. Slice a small amount initially and serve with other dishes. People can help themselves just like a dish of peanuts.

Oh yes. Just last week we had a neighbour over for apéro. She arrived at 7pm and left at 11:30pm. The problem was the saucissons "cocktail" which we bought at Bayeux market. They were rather tasty and she ate over a dozen of them.

At about ten o'clock I hinted that it was getting a bit chilly outside so she took the plate of sausages with her into the salon and settled down there for another hour and a half.

At least we're now tu-toi-ing and swapping bissous in the street.