Well where do i start?
Mar 25th 2009, 5:42 pm
#1
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2009
Location: tacoma washington state
Posts: 35
Well where do i start?
Hello there ben viewing the forums for a while and finally decided to get registered and get some advice.
Came to the US in 1989 with mum and sister i was 13 at the time and it has ben 20 years and i want to go back to scotland to reside. I was in the US army for 7 yrs and medicaly retired in 2001 whith a full pension so im retired you could say at an early age.
Done the usual holidays and my USC wife loves it but i realise living there is different from holidays. My main problem is i know nothing of being an adult in the uk when we left i was just a teenager and new nothing about bills, car, rent ,ect finally found my father in 2001 he still lives in the same house he was in when we left which is pretty normal i guess!
I would love to be next to my dad and step brothers and all my extended family and it kills me everytime i leave to come back to the US. But i also have a son at 9 yrs of age and i have to think about him and how tough it was for me when we came to US. Scotland to Albuquerque NM from the lush green to a desert barren wasteland thanks mum!!
I have so many things to say and ask but cant seem to get it all out AHHH!
thanks for listening and hopefully i will be able to articulate my thoughts better as my time on BE continues
Came to the US in 1989 with mum and sister i was 13 at the time and it has ben 20 years and i want to go back to scotland to reside. I was in the US army for 7 yrs and medicaly retired in 2001 whith a full pension so im retired you could say at an early age.
Done the usual holidays and my USC wife loves it but i realise living there is different from holidays. My main problem is i know nothing of being an adult in the uk when we left i was just a teenager and new nothing about bills, car, rent ,ect finally found my father in 2001 he still lives in the same house he was in when we left which is pretty normal i guess!
I would love to be next to my dad and step brothers and all my extended family and it kills me everytime i leave to come back to the US. But i also have a son at 9 yrs of age and i have to think about him and how tough it was for me when we came to US. Scotland to Albuquerque NM from the lush green to a desert barren wasteland thanks mum!!
I have so many things to say and ask but cant seem to get it all out AHHH!
thanks for listening and hopefully i will be able to articulate my thoughts better as my time on BE continues
Mar 25th 2009, 7:11 pm
#2
itchy feet again!
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: Ex-Canada: now rural West Sussex.
Posts: 1,013
Re: Well where do i start?
Hi, and welcome to the MBTTUK part of BE. I can understand your yearning to come back "home", and your lack of knowledge as to how "things work" can be overwhelming and bewildering. The following link might provide some useful information for you:
http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=267933
There'll be as many people on here to answer questions, as there questions to ask!
I wish you well in your quest
http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=267933
There'll be as many people on here to answer questions, as there questions to ask!
I wish you well in your quest
Mar 25th 2009, 10:29 pm
#3
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Southern Ontario(house is SOLD on our way back to UK/aug 09)
Posts: 426
Re: Well where do i start?
hey! I'm a child expat as well. came to Canada with my parents when young and now an adult want to move back to the UK.
I'm nervous too since i've never lived in England only been on many holidays. I have a CND husband and three children, i suppose its better to move when they are young, like your son age 9.
check out my post. it was recent, and had some good replys about a child expat wanting to move back.
good luck on your emotional journey back!
I'm nervous too since i've never lived in England only been on many holidays. I have a CND husband and three children, i suppose its better to move when they are young, like your son age 9.
check out my post. it was recent, and had some good replys about a child expat wanting to move back.
good luck on your emotional journey back!
Mar 26th 2009, 4:53 am
#4
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2009
Location: tacoma washington state
Posts: 35
Re: Well where do i start?
hey! I'm a child expat as well. came to Canada with my parents when young and now an adult want to move back to the UK.
I'm nervous too since i've never lived in England only been on many holidays. I have a CND husband and three children, i suppose its better to move when they are young, like your son age 9.
check out my post. it was recent, and had some good replys about a child expat wanting to move back.
good luck on your emotional journey back!
I'm nervous too since i've never lived in England only been on many holidays. I have a CND husband and three children, i suppose its better to move when they are young, like your son age 9.
check out my post. it was recent, and had some good replys about a child expat wanting to move back.
good luck on your emotional journey back!
I have a different situation from most as i am fully retired through the veterans administration and dont believe it would be taxed there so i would have a income when i arrive there, And wife doesn't seem to think finding a job would be to hard (she is in IT ) and have my father who introduced me to his soliciter(lawyer) and he can handle most everything on the legal home buying/renting side.
i just want to go back to a place where i dont have the rat race lifestyle and i have been part of the "over consuming gotta have it" lifestyle. I have 2trucks ,1 car, 2quad bikes and 2 harley davidsons and the rv trailer and by childhood standards a big house and it is all crap i dont need all this STUFF!!
and would like to go back to a simpler life. whats wrong with 1 car and a nice comfy fits me sized house and enjoy life and family and not striving for all this meaningless crap.I think it has something to do with my time in the army where i had to do with the bare essentials and you learn to appreciate the little things in life.
When im back in scotland at dads i sleeplike a baby and feel relaxed and at peace. sorry im rambling again trying to get 8 yrs of wanting to come home out at one time Still the worry is my 9yr old son i want to make a decision for all of us and not a selfish one for me alone
And thanks for the links very useful
Mar 26th 2009, 4:58 pm
#5
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Jul 2006
Location: Cochrane, Alberta
Posts: 7,861
Re: Well where do i start?
You can always downsize and get rid of your stuff now 
Seriously, though I wish you well, but research is the key and you're in the right place on this site to assist you with that. You say you want to get out of a rat race, but unsurprisingly, that is what many Britons say when they want to leave the UK also. I suspect many fundamentals of basic living are similar; working, shopping, paying the bills, etc, with a consumer lifestyle and a worship of C-list celebs
What I hope you will find is that family connection that seems to be missing now. Again, research and visits can only tell you so much. Many return to the bosom of their families and never look back. Others return and after the initial novelty value wears off, there seems little connection afterall.
From 13 to 30-something is a big change in you as a person. You have obviously visited a lot and it sounds like you have a very supportive partner. What you crave as a simpler life, may be a big shock to your 9 year old - as big as shock as you experienced being taken to that barren wasteland! I suspect the area you choose in the UK will be crucial to finding what you want. When you have narrowed down the areas, give another shout out on here and the 'locals' will give you good advice. Good luck with it all - slowly but surely, and I'm sure it will all work out for you
Seriously, though I wish you well, but research is the key and you're in the right place on this site to assist you with that. You say you want to get out of a rat race, but unsurprisingly, that is what many Britons say when they want to leave the UK also. I suspect many fundamentals of basic living are similar; working, shopping, paying the bills, etc, with a consumer lifestyle and a worship of C-list celebs
What I hope you will find is that family connection that seems to be missing now. Again, research and visits can only tell you so much. Many return to the bosom of their families and never look back. Others return and after the initial novelty value wears off, there seems little connection afterall.
From 13 to 30-something is a big change in you as a person. You have obviously visited a lot and it sounds like you have a very supportive partner. What you crave as a simpler life, may be a big shock to your 9 year old - as big as shock as you experienced being taken to that barren wasteland! I suspect the area you choose in the UK will be crucial to finding what you want. When you have narrowed down the areas, give another shout out on here and the 'locals' will give you good advice. Good luck with it all - slowly but surely, and I'm sure it will all work out for you
Mar 26th 2009, 6:40 pm
#6
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Southern Ontario(house is SOLD on our way back to UK/aug 09)
Posts: 426
Re: Well where do i start?
Sounds like you've answered your own questions....and plus with the help of family in Scotland sounds like you are all set...I don't think you are being selfish. your boy is young and he will adjust, with his parents by his side.
I am considering the move while the children are young.
We are considering our move very soon. alittle intimidating, but, i'm sure everyone goes thru these emotions...I'm anxious one day..relieved the next, scared about the schooling, I hate to leave my comfort zone, but, its the only way to get back to where it ALL started.
Keep us posted with what you decide...best of luck
I am considering the move while the children are young.
We are considering our move very soon. alittle intimidating, but, i'm sure everyone goes thru these emotions...I'm anxious one day..relieved the next, scared about the schooling, I hate to leave my comfort zone, but, its the only way to get back to where it ALL started.
Keep us posted with what you decide...best of luck
Mar 26th 2009, 8:57 pm
#7
The Kwisatz Haderach
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: North Wales
Posts: 8,080
Re: Well where do i start?
I'd start with a list of all the things that can be sold off and still live comfortably. Then start making the moving plans. I want to sell the house well before we plan to move, and rent for a few month/or a year so we can get everything settled up properly that way we aren't under the gun to sell and take a lot less. Then take time moving our money over ready to buy another (for cash 
)
)
Mar 27th 2009, 3:28 pm
#8
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2009
Location: tacoma washington state
Posts: 35
Re: Well where do i start?
Well i need to really do some thinking on the logistics of the whole thing. I might have to do a four year plan and just methodically work the plan and hopefully the housing market will rebound somewhat.
Then i can unload the house and cars trucks and all the other stuff because right now no one is buying anything, i think unloading and paying everything off is going to take a while but i need to make sure i maintain my good credit rating and clear all my debt that way i have a good fresh start without any financial baggage.
The move will be difficult as it is without some self induced financial drama!!
Just packing and doing a runner is not a opption the crap will follow you! and make your move miserable.
Then i can unload the house and cars trucks and all the other stuff because right now no one is buying anything, i think unloading and paying everything off is going to take a while but i need to make sure i maintain my good credit rating and clear all my debt that way i have a good fresh start without any financial baggage.
The move will be difficult as it is without some self induced financial drama!!
Just packing and doing a runner is not a opption the crap will follow you! and make your move miserable.
Mar 28th 2009, 1:09 pm
#9
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Southern Ontario(house is SOLD on our way back to UK/aug 09)
Posts: 426
Re: Well where do i start?
I've been selling my stuff on Kijiji..free ads..not sure if the USA has a free sites to sell. maybe craiglist...?
You'd be surprised how men find money for grown-up toys.
You'd be surprised how men find money for grown-up toys.
Mar 28th 2009, 3:05 pm
#10
The Kwisatz Haderach
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: North Wales
Posts: 8,080
Re: Well where do i start?
We are listing our boat on Craigslist this spring. Kijiji is in some areas not our though.
Mar 29th 2009, 3:02 am
#11
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2009
Location: tacoma washington state
Posts: 35
Re: Well where do i start?
i would love to go now but have to get this right the first time for this to have a chance of working.
But unfortunately i have bought two many toys that i will have to get rid of before leaving and the house sold and i am not wiling to lose all that i have invested in the life i have here and so we have a lump of cash to help with the unforseen things that always come up with a move like this.
luckily i have the old dad there for support and help with all the stuff on that end that needs looked at before we get there
so im going to formulate a plan and start working it!!
i will be here on the board learning as much as i can through this process and offering any help to others when i can.
BTW found a house across the street from from dads for a decent price
But unfortunately i have bought two many toys that i will have to get rid of before leaving and the house sold and i am not wiling to lose all that i have invested in the life i have here and so we have a lump of cash to help with the unforseen things that always come up with a move like this.
luckily i have the old dad there for support and help with all the stuff on that end that needs looked at before we get there
so im going to formulate a plan and start working it!!
i will be here on the board learning as much as i can through this process and offering any help to others when i can.
BTW found a house across the street from from dads for a decent price
Mar 29th 2009, 3:25 pm
#12
The Kwisatz Haderach
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: North Wales
Posts: 8,080
Re: Well where do i start?
Now you have to hope the house is still available once you have sold off all the stuff and got ready to move.
I found a nice one down the road from my Mum, I'd love to buy. But I doubt it'd still be available by the time we get going.
I found a nice one down the road from my Mum, I'd love to buy. But I doubt it'd still be available by the time we get going.
Mar 29th 2009, 5:31 pm
#13
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2009
Location: tacoma washington state
Posts: 35
Re: Well where do i start?
How long have you been in the us? And where is home in the uk.?
And yes it would be great for us to have a house close to dad but im not going to hold my breath.
Im also considering taking my favorite truck and my harleys with us!!. then all i got to do is sell/rent the house and get rid of all the houshold stuff
Mar 29th 2009, 7:10 pm
#14
Retired
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 34,649
Re: Well where do i start?
Hello there ben viewing the forums for a while and finally decided to get registered and get some advice.
Came to the US in 1989 with mum and sister i was 13 at the time and it has ben 20 years and i want to go back to scotland to reside. I was in the US army for 7 yrs and medicaly retired in 2001 whith a full pension so im retired you could say at an early age.
Done the usual holidays and my USC wife loves it but i realise living there is different from holidays. My main problem is i know nothing of being an adult in the uk when we left i was just a teenager and new nothing about bills, car, rent ,ect finally found my father in 2001 he still lives in the same house he was in when we left which is pretty normal i guess!
I would love to be next to my dad and step brothers and all my extended family and it kills me everytime i leave to come back to the US. But i also have a son at 9 yrs of age and i have to think about him and how tough it was for me when we came to US. Scotland to Albuquerque NM from the lush green to a desert barren wasteland thanks mum!!
Came to the US in 1989 with mum and sister i was 13 at the time and it has ben 20 years and i want to go back to scotland to reside. I was in the US army for 7 yrs and medicaly retired in 2001 whith a full pension so im retired you could say at an early age.
Done the usual holidays and my USC wife loves it but i realise living there is different from holidays. My main problem is i know nothing of being an adult in the uk when we left i was just a teenager and new nothing about bills, car, rent ,ect finally found my father in 2001 he still lives in the same house he was in when we left which is pretty normal i guess!
I would love to be next to my dad and step brothers and all my extended family and it kills me everytime i leave to come back to the US. But i also have a son at 9 yrs of age and i have to think about him and how tough it was for me when we came to US. Scotland to Albuquerque NM from the lush green to a desert barren wasteland thanks mum!!
Wife needs a spouse visa: http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk
Son should be a British citizen by descent so needs a British consular birth certificate and British passport.
Mar 29th 2009, 10:27 pm
#15
The Kwisatz Haderach
Joined: Aug 2008
Location: North Wales
Posts: 8,080
Re: Well where do i start?
How long have you been in the us? And where is home in the uk.?
And yes it would be great for us to have a house close to dad but im not going to hold my breath.
Im also considering taking my favorite truck and my harleys with us!!. then all i got to do is sell/rent the house and get rid of all the houshold stuff
And yes it would be great for us to have a house close to dad but im not going to hold my breath.
Im also considering taking my favorite truck and my harleys with us!!. then all i got to do is sell/rent the house and get rid of all the houshold stuff
