Its is exactly 5 years ago today that i landed in Canada(Toronto)..22nd April 2008.

I think i did an update after 3 years but didn't bother last year. Since April 08 i have lived in London Ontario (briefly), Edmonton Until March 2012 and Calgary to date.

I came as a family of 5 now i am a family of 1..i got divorced last year and have been living on my own for over a year now trying to make it work. I have a good job, i live in a nice house and earn a more than healthy income but with my wife and kids back in England it all just seems pointless. I am trying to hang on for citizenship at the same time as trying to go home

I am stuck with two choices stay in Canada and be secure in my job and financially better off and see my kids at most twice a year or return home and start again with no job little in the way of financial security and see my kids every weekend..here in lies the problem if my kids were 10 years younger i would go home in a heart beat..however they are teenagers now and in 2 or 3 years will be going their own way in the world and wont need me so much.

Still back to Canada..i think i have come to accept it for what it is..i no longer compare it to the UK because they are not the same..which is better? i think that depends on the sort of person you are..if you like hiking, camping are a little introverted, a tad geeky or a bit weird then Canada is a good fit..if you area little bit more with it..like sport and do a lot of ducking and diving and are outgoing and you wanna emigrate then probably Australia is for you and not Canada.

I dont bother preaching to those who want to come..i dont poo poo people who have come and fallen in love with the place and like to sing it from the roof tops at every opportunity and i have every sympathy with those who struggle and want to go home.

Canada is what it is..some will love it..some will hate it and most like me will just get on with it and take the good with the bad.

Cheers

I feel for you! Being stuck between a rock and a hard place! As you say, your kids are now teenagers and that in itself can be difficult. Perhaps as they get older they will see Canada as an adventure like so many others and eventually come back. You are wise to wait for citizenship. And as they say about jobs a "bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" - my OH told me that yesterday and informed me that he does not want to now move back to UK anymore. He has different reasons to me and his do not involve family while mine do!

About Canada, you are right, it is what it is. I am beginning to accept that too. It is just so bloody boring though! Still the sun is out, spring is here on Vancouver Island and I am also trying to get on with it!

What do you find boring? I have seen a few people say the same thing, just wondering what made your life/the UK so exciting?

Sorry it didn't work out for you with your relationship. That must be very tough being so far away from your children. Best of luck whatever you decide to do.

Hye great post sorry to hear about your marriage break up. Nothing worse than sun shines all the time expats in canada! After a few years its boring!

Probably has to do with where we live as well. Can't describe it properly but when you chat with Canadians, as in neighbours or supposedly friends every thing is just so surface, there is no depth. One walk amongst the trees is just the same as every single other walk with only a bit of coastline maybe but still all the same, firs and salaal and nice bark paths. One mountain same as the other! Food shopping is a nightmare, basic and very much boring with the emphasis on American food. Restaurants all basically serve the same menu. TV awful and the politeness and political correctness can drive you crazy! I never thought Canada would be so much like USA! I don't expect that it would be British but I did expect a bit more familiarity to what I grew up with. I have lived 12 years on Vancouver Island so it is only my own experiences but when I leave and go home I am like a child in a sweet shop!
Of course you can turn this on its head and say these are all positives when you come from a place full of turmoil, mad traffic, lots of people and higher crime! It can also be a quiet haven to come back to with Eagles and Orcas for company and being most times the only person on a beach and few boats out at sea but sometimes when I am on the beach I wish to see all that activity and not be so alone! So it is probably where we live more than Canada in general.

Congratulations on having passed a milestone. I understand where you are, as when I met my husband he had three teenage kids and a divorce, and it always seems that the father seems to miss out emotionally....I'm sure not all of them, but the great majority. It's bloody awful. The good thing is that you were with the kids when you were younger, and they'll remember that, and you will be there for them when they are older, but....teenagers are a big black hole and they're totally self obsessed and you'd never be able to do the right thing anyway. Once you have your citizenship you have the freedom to do what and when you want. Best of luck

Well yes being a father you dont get any support especially emotionally and you are left to deal with it on your own..two of my children are teenagers however my youngest is 9 nearly 10..for him i worry the most because we were so close

There is no reason why he can't be with you. What's best for the children and all that

That's bloody awful. Are the older two kids very supportive of their younger brother? Although things didn't go well for you and your wife in Canada, would she be amenable to letting you have the three for the long summer holidays?

i wouldn't want to split up the family even further..he is a very happy boy always has been..he is also very close to his Mum and his older brother..so he is in the best place..it doesn't stop me thinking of them and missing them every day.

That's the plan

Sounds like you all have your heads screwed on correctly.

I wish you all the best

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