Hi

Have been up most of the night feeling like the worst mother in the world. It was the boys' last day at school yesterday and I knew it would be traumatic and it was - even more than I thought! I had been warned by the mother of a child in Year 6 that in the Year 6 Leavers' Assembly they had also called my two up to the front and given them a leaving present as well as the Year 6 children and my older son was in tears then.

At home time the 6 year old came bouncing out happy as larry and then a few children from Matthew's class started coming out in tears and then finally he followed, being virtually held up by one of his friends, crying his eyes out. He cried all the way home and then later in the evening I found him making a card for one of his friends saying thank you for "cheering him up when he felt down" and saying he "will never forget him". Then at 10pm I heard him sobbing away in his bed.

It is only going to get worse over the next couple of weeks as we have to say goodbye to other family friends he has known since he was a baby and then finally my parents, as he is particularly close to my mum.

So I spent most of last night worrying myself silly whether we are doing the right thing and whether we are just being selfish taking them away from everything they know etc etc. He is convinced he won't make any friends for a long time when he gets there because when we went to look at our house he only saw girls in the houses round and about.

I know logically it will all be alright eventually, but at the moment it is not a very pleasant time to be going through. I have just read a post by Bear- Diesel saying she will be exhausted when she gets on the plane on Sunday and I can fully understand that as I imagine it is emotional exhaustion as well as physical exhaustion - well it will be with me I am sure.

Anyway sorry for pouring all this out first thing in the morning, it gets it off my chest at least!!

Lisa

Dont' worry Lisa, better to cry it all out at the time then they won't brood and fester later. They will soon make new friends in your general area when they start their new school. Remind them they can keep in touch with IM or one of the safer networking sites like bebo or facebook too. Good luck with your new life. Anita.

We will be going through the same thing this time next year, my son will be also in year 6, but we've decided to leave before the end of year maudlin assembly where everyone gets super emotional. I know it will be a difficult time for him as he is very close to his friends and particularly my in-laws, my daughter on the other hand, hates school and can't wait to go. Soooo difficult, but you have to hold on to the fact that you hope you are taking them to a place abundant with opportunities and a lifestyle they wouldn't get to experience in the uk.

Oh the joys of parenthood, we have this all to come!

Good luck with the move, you have my sincere heart felt good wishes for luck and happiness in your new venture!
Jo X

Hmmm Lisa

Poor you - it sounds very gruelling and I don't really know what to say apart from you aren't the worst mother in the world. I think I will feel like this when my son leaves his nursery/preschool- but at least I know they will all be going.

Do his best friends have web cams/skype etc. Could you buy a cheapie for a couple of them? could they practice before they go?

There are boys in Canada! I reckon there are loads of boys on your road its just they were all out doing more exciting things like rafting, skiing (OK so I know not in May, but I'm just trying to give you a list of exciting things) so he didn't see them. Specifically we met 3 boys I think 8ish (twins) and 10ish- so they exist and we could introduce you- but we won't be there for a bit? (sob, sob, my own bad mother complex). There are boys on this forum in south Calgary around that age (did DOBBIE say he had a boy, has almost canadian? is mj crockers 10yr old a boy? ). I have a boy who would LOVE your boys, but I readily admit they won't love him - he is at that hero worship older boys and want to play football with them stage! My poor son went to preschool this week and found he was the only boy, a plague of girls, all the boys either don't do those days, were off sick or on hols- I felt pretty sorry for him.

Chin up

Gryph

a difficult situation but you know what makes your family tick - I am sure you will find the best way of dealing with it.

If its any help, my older children (now 19,18 and 12) all sobbed when they left primary school. They were going to a different High School to the majority of their class (only about 8 miles away) and made phone calls, sent cards etc as though they were about to fall off the planet.

None of them ever looked back, and even though we live within a mile or two of their old friends, they rarely see then an have new friends that they made at high school and beyond.

So don't worry, the tears will turn to excitement and if you ever decide to spend a couple of months back in the UK visiting family, they will probably moan that they are missing their Canadian friends and want to go "home".

you may feel bad just now but just take a look at what canada has to offer and what kind of life yous will have and when your son is old enough he will thank you for giving him a better lifeso cheer up and dont be so hard on yourself. try letting him see the photos on the internet of the animals ect it worked for our kids and heck thay are still hanging on in therecheer up it will all soon be a thing of the past for you good luck for now
kate

Oh Lisa

You have started my tears too now !!!!! And I am still packing !!!

Know exactly how you feel as we had tears a couple of weeks ago at the soccer presentation - it suddenly hit Nate that that was going to the last one for the club and he sobbed and sobbed like you have never seen before. But have to admit he did it in style he set all the moms off and all the kids too

His school are in final rehearsals for the Graduation Service and yesterday he said he was singing and actually listening to the words he was singing and it all got too much for him and he broke down at school too ! Then one of the boys is off on holiday to visit his grandparents in some foreign country and that set him off.

Thankfully we only have a small amount of good byes to do and that will be next weekend so hopefully wont be too bad. We live in hope.

Two emotional birds on the flight Lisa but at least we will be together.

Gaynor
x

what a flight that will be- are you sitting together?

Not at the moment - havent even booked onto it and it leaves 2 weeks on Sunday playing price wars

good luck with your flight as well Gay

Don't worry. Kids are remarkably resilient when it comes to such things and also have very short memories. My stepson was not pleased when we moved from London to Oakville and he had to leave his mates behind. It didn't take long to find new ones. He was well-narked when we moved again. He started school the same day we arrived in Gatineau. He only went for the afternoon session. He had a new gang when he got home.

Gotta be honest, your kids had better toughen up, Boys crying just don't cut it here.

Watch a hockey Game, kid could be lying flat out, no way will he cry, his team mates wouldn't forgive him.

Maybe that's why Brits play Cricket and we play Hockey, we don't let a game interfere with a good fight.

That's a bit harsh.... My son played Ice and skater Hockey for 4 years 12 - 14as a defenceman and was the kindest boy, really sensitive but as soon as he put that kit on he became someone I didn't know and boy was he good at his job.

So, in a roundabout way, you're saying he was a thug?