Originally Posted by sas-lou (Post 7146016)

You guys are amazing .. Thank you so much for all of your kind words ..

I am in a more positive place now. I have made some calls and apparantly i can survive being a single parent in Ottawa with my somewhat limited funds (until i get a job that is). I have an appointment on Monday with someone to help me find a reasonably priced place here and i have my children .. what more do i need????

(He is not the children's dad, he doesn't behave like a father around them, more of a male role model .. He wants to remain my friend but i need to break away, who knows in time, but i don't think he would come and see the children to be honest, the boys have me and they will have me all to themselves)

Anyway .. you all have a good day ..:thumbsup:

Originally Posted by sas-lou (Post 7146016)

You guys are amazing .. Thank you so much for all of your kind words ..

I am in a more positive place now. I have made some calls and apparantly i can survive being a single parent in Ottawa with my somewhat limited funds (until i get a job that is). I have an appointment on Monday with someone to help me find a reasonably priced place here and i have my children .. what more do i need????

(He is not the children's dad, he doesn't behave like a father around them, more of a male role model .. He wants to remain my friend but i need to break away, who knows in time, but i don't think he would come and see the children to be honest, the boys have me and they will have me all to themselves)

Anyway .. you all have a good day ..:thumbsup:

Originally Posted by sas-lou (Post 7145362)

And that is part of my problem .. i am such an active person, not working and being stuck in the house (par walking to bayshore/linclonfields/carlingwood mall), its driving me crazy .. and now the drivers have said no in the vote yesterday .. Just sack them all, its rediculous .. the buses are an essential service .. but the good thing is having 3 malls within an hours walking distance should up my chances of finding something/anything.

I have just been on the phone with OCISO, they are an organisation that help new immigrants in Ottawa ..the lady told me that with my savings i should be fine to be out of work for 4 months, she has given me a phone number to call a housing organisation who help people find affordable accomodation and has offered to email me with some info about jobs openings with my experience. That was very kind of her .. so i am feeling a little more optimistic now ..

Originally Posted by Elaine B. (Post 7145058)

I'll keep this short and I'll probably get grief for this but I would go home and get the support and comfort you need.:wub: I hope things work out no matter what you decide. I can't see how your kids can be truly happy in Canada if you are miserable.

Originally Posted by sas-lou (Post 7144930)

Everything has gone to crap so i'm looking at options available to me now.

I have just been to the DEFRA website, to see how i return my cat to the UK with us (if we take that option) and unfortunately because she isn't on a pet passport, she would have to go into quarantine for 6 months .. ouch .. Hubby doesn't want her as apparantly she is my cat now .. Nice ..

I basically have 2 options available now ..

STAY IN CANADA ..

I have no job yet, nowhere to live as i wouldn't be able to afford this place i'm in at the moment, but my kids are so happy here and i do have about $13K savings (hubby transferred a little money into my account last night) and keep my cat with me. The bus strike vote yesterday was not good news so i also don't have means to travel far ..

GO BACK TO THE UK ..

I have no job, nowhere to live (although i could stay with my mum for a few days but her house is so small), i wont have my cat, my kids will have to go back to a Leicester school, so my eldest's confidence can go back down the toilet .. but i will have support ..

Hubby is moving out tonight for a week so i can try and get things sorted. i am so low that i'm starting to have silly thoughts (you get the idea, wont say it as i don't want to get upset again) .. i have been in tears all morning although hid it very well from the children.
Hubby doesn't want me now and i feel so ashamed as i physically went for him last night .. he knows how low i feel and i am trying everything in my power to make our marriage work but he is just rubbing salt in the wound. Im crying out to feel loved but get no affection in return other than a kiss on the forehead or a kiss on the lips whilst he is looking away, maybe that makes him feel better, knowing i ended it so he can feel less guilt .. I want him to feel guilt .. I came here for something better, now i'm told i emotionally blackmailed him, bull, he could of told me it was over whilst i was in the UK ..

Anyway .. i don't have a clue what to do .. other than cry some more and smoke .. lol ..

I have been talking back and forth with some people on this site about my marriage problems .. and had some very good advice given .. Some days i am strong and i say "yes i can make this work in Canada alone" other days i am so confused .. I can accept my marriage is over (i deserve better anyway and i will divorce him on the grounds of adultry) .. Its the "What should i do next" that scares the hell out of me ..

Any advice?????? Does anyone have a crystal ball???

Originally Posted by Piff Poff (Post 7145412)

So you feel safer I would make sure you had enough money in an account for flights for you and your boys to get back to the UK. This is something I did when we first got here, I made sure I had enough money to at least get back to the UK if necessary (spent most of it now I feel secure:rofl:). .

Originally Posted by MikeUK (Post 7146701)

I'd take some time out to try to build your self a panic fund, having an account with enough money to run with allows you choices
as a result it will help lower stress levels

Originally Posted by Piff Poff (Post 7146829)

I'm lucky enough to now be financially secure enough not to need that seperate panic fund. I had kept enough in a UK account for a very rainy day, now that's down to 200 pounds and our joint rainy day fund now could cope any unforseen flights back etc.