Hi all

So we landed last week (very uneventful, thankfully!) and are currently in Ontario on a 3 week reccie, checking out schools, looking for jobs etc.

I have three children aged 9 (March '02), 6 (December '04) and 3 (August '07) and last week we visited the local Catholic Elementary School. The kids loved the school, which was a great relief, but obviously the grades/ admission ages for the Canadian school system are somewhat different to UK.

To cut a long story short, by 3 year old would start in JK next September, my 6 year old will go into grade 2 (having completed P2 at home), which is a year back, but I accept that there are differences and this is the way things are done here. However, because of how my first son's birthday falls, he would be put back not one, but two years! The principal has said that he would go into grade 4, when he would have been going into P6 at home. I have supplied the school with workbooks, reports and copies of the NI curriculum which can easily compared to work completed in grade 4 and some of what is completed in grade 5 here in Ontario. The principal is determined not to move on the 'age' criteria, regardless of my son's previous education/ capabilities.

We are currently staying with our close friends who immigrated two years ago, and their son was in the same class as mine at home, but as he is born 2.5 months earlier, he will be in a higher grade.

I really feel strongly that I don't want my son to go back two years, complete a full year of a curriculum that he has already covered which carries with it the potential for boredom and 'sitting back' at school.

So, after that very long-winded explanation, my question is... what can I do?

Thanks for your help.

ZaraLou

In my experience there is enough difference in curriculum content (Items covered not quantity or quality) to make the age group choice a good one. I think the age math will end up identical at HS graduation.

The demographics are such that school enrolment is dropping and its getting very competitive between schools and boards to attract kids and the associated funding that goes with them.

I would consider telling the principal that you will enrol the kids elsewhere if he wont at least asses your oldest to go in the grade above (one year behind where he is now) with his friend. Kids get moved grades here based on ability, my bosses kid was starting at the RMC, having finished high school at 16!

The least he should do if he wants the extra body and the funding that goes with it is asses your 9 year old, its in his interest too as I doubt he wants a bored 9 year old making trouble for the other grade 4s (presumably thats what hes proposing)

Schools and principals vary of course, some are great, others are, well, not so great. Sometimes you have to play hardball, they will just put it down to English brashness and make a mark in the kids permanent file not to mess with the parents

I was in the same position when we came here. My kids went into grades 1 and 2. There were kids in grade 1 that couldn't read and my kids had been reading since age 3 and were quite advanced for their ages.

The best thing I did for them though was to leave them with age appropriate peers. I am in Ontario too.

If you are here for the long haul and not just passing through, then it would be sensible for your children to be with their peers. They will have fun enough settling in, making new friends etc. 9 year old boys are not the most mature and I am sure a grade 6 teacher would not want him in the class.

My son is in grade 6 in Ontario and it is a very interesting grade. Some of the girls are into boys, dating has started (albeit innocent) but I would not want to put a 9 yr old into that environment. They are just not mature enough to cope emotionally.

A lot of kids here do "Kumon" maths and English outside of school. This could be one option for you for academic stretching.

The other issue is that you have to think about if/when they go to college. Currently school finishes at grade 12. Grade 13 is optional as it was abolished a few years ago. Kids can go to college/uni aged just 17 if they are the young end of the year. IMHO this is just toooo young. Or they can do year 13 and then they are back with their age group again. I have known kids do year 13 and are really sad that most of their peers have gone away to uni and they are left behind. Queens's University in Kingston has had 4 suicides this year so far. There is enough pressure on them already.

A bit of a ramble, but kids will always find other stuff to amuse themselves and I really do think that you need to think of their emotionally capabilities before the academics at this stage.

I'm sure people will disagree with me as our children are the most emotive issue we ever have (and rightly so too) but this is just my 4p worth.

Thanks, will be interested to hear how you get on with this. I forsee a similar issue with one of my kids when we move next year, really don't want her to be totally bored but obviously want her to be within her age group.

One of my sons was advanced a year when we came - we called a few schools within the same school district and found one that was prepared to advance him. We did this because he had already completed his first year at school in the UK but was due to go into part time kindergarten here which we thought was not a good idea. Our other son went into the grade that was age appropriate (GR 4) although he was academically advanced. I don't think you can compare a grade 4 here with year 4 in the UK - they cover very different things and the way subjects are taught is also very different. My eldest son did not find his first year of school here as simple as we imagined as he was not used to the way things were expected to be presented. I think advancing him would have been a mistake as, at least the ease with which he could handle the academic side of the work gave him time to get the hang of the other stuff which was unfamiliar to him. Second son - who is up a grade has coped well- after all he started in Grade 1 with everyone else. He does sometimes feel sad that in his sport activities, outside of school, no one else on his team is in his class (as they are all playing in the year older age group). And this year - there will be a kid from his school on his team - but he is in the grade below which also feels weird to my son. Two years out of the age group could have real problems socially wouldn't be my choice based on our experiences with both of our boys - but you know your own child best.

Four years ago, I was you. There was stress, anxiety and tears, and that was just me! In fact, if I could be bothered to find the posts, I'm sure I wrote much of what you have written.

misplacedheidi has nailed it. I ended up leaving my girls in the age-appropriate class (after much advice from this site that I (admittedly reluctantly at the time) took on board. My eldest was mature for her age, and could have gone up a year easily academically, and was only 4 days the wrong side of the cut off anyway. But we persevered, and I can now tell you it worked out fine! My girls are currently in Grade 5 and Grade 7. Having a boy in either of their classes, who was more than a year younger would be awful for the child, socially - no matter how academically bright IMHO.

My eldest was bored in some classes - in her first year, from September through till April, bored rigid until her class kind of "caught up" with her UK level in Maths and Literacy levels. However, she was learning a whole bunch of new Canadian stuff and learning to settle in. It has done her no harm. She is still a great student and remains motivated.

And this has been the crux of the matter - which, with hindsight, I can now tell you from our experience is crucial.

My only proviso for you is to consider whether this is a one or three year "posting" for example, or if your plans are to stay for the long haul. Obviously, plans can change anyway - but if you are intending to stay, please consider leaving your 9 year old boy with all the other 9 year old boys - and I mean this with the kindest of intentions.

Thanks for the comment!
My other tongue in cheek comment is why put the kids up a year - they have to go to work a year earlier if you do that

I think this is absolutely the crucial issue. If you are here for a couple of years on a work visa and intend to return to the UK, then the social awkwardness of being young for the year will undo itself and possibly even work in his favour in a couple of years on returning to the UK, plus he'll have been academically stretched a bit more. If he has the academic mindset to keep up despite the lack of out-of-school social interaction with his class peers, it makes sense.

If, conversely, you intend to stay here until he graduates high school, don't fight the school's assessment, and allow him to be placed in the year-appropriate grade. He won't come to any harm by repeating some stuff, and the social ties that will come from interacting with his peers will help him to settle in that much more quickly. That will help the whole family; if the eldest child is happy in school the younger ones have somebody to look up to and emulate.

Thanks all!

This is certainly an emotive issue for us, I just want to do what is best for my son and knowing what that might be is turning out to be a challenge!

There was never any question about trying to put him into grade 6, I absolutely agree he should be with children his own age and would not want to place him with older kids for exactly the reasons listed in the above posts.

However, given the fact he will have completed P5 at home which equates to most of the curriculum covered in grade 4 (except social studies/french) and a little of what is covered in grade 5, it seems sensible to put him into grade 5. This would see him join his best friend who is just a couple of months older, and a group of friends in that grade that he has met whilst holidaying here over the last couple of years. He does not seem to struggle socially with them, however I accept that there would be some children in grade 5 who would be a full year older than him.

It's difficult to know what is best, and I certainly appreciate hearing the experiences of all of the posters above. From what I gather there are very few instances where exceptions are made to the age admission criteria, with only two children in the whole school having been advanced due to being 'gifted'. I think therefore that we are pretty much fighting a battle we cannot win, although I am definitely going to push the principal to consider the work my son has already completed, and use it to inform an individual education plan so that he doesn't 'settle back' in areas he has already covered.

If only he had been born in December eh?

Thanks for all your help everyone! Will keep you posted with what happens

ZaraLou