The reality of immigrating
Sep 13th 2010, 12:55 am
#1
Just Joined
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 19
The reality of immigrating
After having read posts where people have been disillusioned by the reality of immigrating to Canada, I wanted to mention my own experience in immigrating. My husband and I, together with a 9 month old and a 2 year immigrated from South Africa to UK 8 years ago.
We have never regretted moving but we went through hell the first year. Basically I felt the experiences that we had moving to the UK are going to be the same experienced in any immigration.
First of all, you must realise that when you move to a new country, basically you don't exist. Your whole financial history that you have in the UK which is actually very valuable, is worthless anywhere else. They don't care if you have a brilliant credit history or no claims bonus in the UK. They don't care much about your work history. You are a non-entity and its so difficult to understand that when you plan to move to a new country. You are like an 18 year old starting out after school for the first time and as a +35 year old, that is very difficult concept to deal with again.
The strain on you and your family is enormous so make sure you have your eyes wide open. Make sure that you have very, very big real reasons for wanting to move and that its not just based on a whim. You don't just carry on where you left off in the UK. Forget it.
The grass is not greener on the other side. The problems are just different from the one's you left behind.
It does take you about 5 years to feel that you are really settled and happy again in your new life, so don't do this lightly.
We have never regretted moving but we went through hell the first year. Basically I felt the experiences that we had moving to the UK are going to be the same experienced in any immigration.
First of all, you must realise that when you move to a new country, basically you don't exist. Your whole financial history that you have in the UK which is actually very valuable, is worthless anywhere else. They don't care if you have a brilliant credit history or no claims bonus in the UK. They don't care much about your work history. You are a non-entity and its so difficult to understand that when you plan to move to a new country. You are like an 18 year old starting out after school for the first time and as a +35 year old, that is very difficult concept to deal with again.
The strain on you and your family is enormous so make sure you have your eyes wide open. Make sure that you have very, very big real reasons for wanting to move and that its not just based on a whim. You don't just carry on where you left off in the UK. Forget it.
The grass is not greener on the other side. The problems are just different from the one's you left behind.
It does take you about 5 years to feel that you are really settled and happy again in your new life, so don't do this lightly.
Sep 13th 2010, 1:24 am
#2
ModerĪ±tor Emeritus
Joined: Sep 2003
Location: Upstate South Carolina
Posts: 30,771
Re: The reality of immigrating
I'm tempted to make this a sticky post!
Sep 13th 2010, 1:48 am
#3
Slightly Canadian
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: St. John's, Newfoundland
Posts: 10,129
Re: The reality of immigrating
To add to the sticky (
)...
For those who immigrate because their partners are Canadian, life can also be challenging from time to time. Whilst you generally have a head-start on integrating with support from family and friends, the truth of the matter is that one of you inevitably has to compromise on where you live. That can put a lot of strain on a relationship if things in Canada are not all rosy. Add in kids, particularly those born in Canada, and life becomes much more complicated. It wise to be sure of your relationship, flexible and adaptable before getting into something.
For my part, I had a big wobble this year, some five and bit years after emigrating. A number of issues, notably lack of career opportunity for me and frustration about the Mrs getting a permanent job, were causing me to reconsider. Now things have improved markedly with a new job for me and a permanent job for the Mrs so we are back on track. It is a level of complexity and emotional turmoil that I never thought I would have to deal with though.
)...For those who immigrate because their partners are Canadian, life can also be challenging from time to time. Whilst you generally have a head-start on integrating with support from family and friends, the truth of the matter is that one of you inevitably has to compromise on where you live. That can put a lot of strain on a relationship if things in Canada are not all rosy. Add in kids, particularly those born in Canada, and life becomes much more complicated. It wise to be sure of your relationship, flexible and adaptable before getting into something.
For my part, I had a big wobble this year, some five and bit years after emigrating. A number of issues, notably lack of career opportunity for me and frustration about the Mrs getting a permanent job, were causing me to reconsider. Now things have improved markedly with a new job for me and a permanent job for the Mrs so we are back on track. It is a level of complexity and emotional turmoil that I never thought I would have to deal with though.
Sep 13th 2010, 3:21 am
#4
slanderer of the innocent
Joined: Dec 2008
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 6,695
Re: The reality of immigrating
To add to the sticky ()...
For those who immigrate because their partners are Canadian, life can also be challenging from time to time. Whilst you generally have a head-start on integrating with support from family and friends, the truth of the matter is that one of you inevitably has to compromise on where you live. That can put a lot of strain on a relationship if things in Canada are not all rosy. Add in kids, particularly those born in Canada, and life becomes much more complicated. It wise to be sure of your relationship, flexible and adaptable before getting into something.
For my part, I had a big wobble this year, some five and bit years after emigrating. A number of issues, notably lack of career opportunity for me and frustration about the Mrs getting a permanent job, were causing me to reconsider. Now things have improved markedly with a new job for me and a permanent job for the Mrs so we are back on track. It is a level of complexity and emotional turmoil that I never thought I would have to deal with though.
)...For those who immigrate because their partners are Canadian, life can also be challenging from time to time. Whilst you generally have a head-start on integrating with support from family and friends, the truth of the matter is that one of you inevitably has to compromise on where you live. That can put a lot of strain on a relationship if things in Canada are not all rosy. Add in kids, particularly those born in Canada, and life becomes much more complicated. It wise to be sure of your relationship, flexible and adaptable before getting into something.
For my part, I had a big wobble this year, some five and bit years after emigrating. A number of issues, notably lack of career opportunity for me and frustration about the Mrs getting a permanent job, were causing me to reconsider. Now things have improved markedly with a new job for me and a permanent job for the Mrs so we are back on track. It is a level of complexity and emotional turmoil that I never thought I would have to deal with though.
I can relate. I wasn't particularly wise about my relationship when I came over. I was young and in love and not thinking about the long term ramifications of it all when I emigrated. It was all going to be great! Also, when times are tough, you really realise the imbalance when the cradle partner has all his/her friends/family to call on and you don't have your own old friends etc.
Sep 13th 2010, 5:11 am
#5
Sawdust making harpy
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: Alberta
Posts: 11,291
Re: The reality of immigrating
I can relate. I wasn't particularly wise about my relationship when I came over. I was young and in love and not thinking about the long term ramifications of it all when I emigrated. It was all going to be great! Also, when times are tough, you really realise the imbalance when the cradle partner has all his/her friends/family to call on and you don't have your own old friends etc.
Sep 13th 2010, 5:16 am
#6
.
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 20,185
Re: The reality of immigrating
Plus, most of the food is crap and there are no proper pubs.
Sep 13th 2010, 5:27 am
#8
Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 120
Re: The reality of immigrating
Or you could just file this under "common sense".
"If you move country, it might not work out..."
"If you move country, it might not work out..."
Sep 13th 2010, 5:51 am
#9
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 506
Re: The reality of immigrating
No secret & nothing new. Common sense. A little cliche. It's been said a million times before.
Sep 13th 2010, 5:57 am
#10
Displaced Disgrace
Joined: Sep 2008
Location: HRM N.S.
Posts: 745
Re: The reality of immigrating
I would add that it's a foolish man that underestimates just how bad raccoon piss smells on a newly laid carpet (ironically it is also quite sticky)....
Sep 13th 2010, 6:20 am
#12
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 506
Re: The reality of immigrating
Sep 14th 2010, 12:23 pm
#13
Forum Regular
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 253
Re: The reality of immigrating
We should not forget that Canada has an official program for immigration not like the UK...The way Canada adverstises this program as if things are greener on their side. This is especially true for highly educated immigrants whose education and professional experience get high marks during the immigration process BUT once in Canada, you become nobody. You end up spending all your savings, may have to go to their schools again in the hope of finding a job, and (if lucky) getting any job that is faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar from your qualifications just to live in a survival mode.
So many people feel cheated.....
So many people feel cheated.....
Sep 14th 2010, 3:08 pm
#14
.
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 20,185
Re: The reality of immigrating
I was watching a football match and some cradle mentioned something about putting mustard on the ball, what's that all about? Are they mad?
They also say something about "body English." Apparently its something that goes sideways, do thing they think we're crooked? What a f*****g weird place.
They also say something about "body English." Apparently its something that goes sideways, do thing they think we're crooked? What a f*****g weird place.
Sep 14th 2010, 3:13 pm
#15
Born again atheist
Joined: Jul 2005
Location: Europe (to be specified).
Posts: 30,259
Re: The reality of immigrating
We should not forget that Canada has an official program for immigration not like the UK...The way Canada adverstises this program as if things are greener on their side. This is especially true for highly educated immigrants whose education and professional experience get high marks during the immigration process BUT once in Canada, you become nobody. You end up spending all your savings, may have to go to their schools again in the hope of finding a job, and (if lucky) getting any job that is faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar from your qualifications just to live in a survival mode.
