snowqueen

After all this time of waiting, we are potentially so close to our goal. (AOR June 04) We might feasibly have med requests very soon. So why do I suddenly feel so odd about everything?

I know I probably need a 'refresher' visit, and in fact one was planned for around now, but had to put it back to next spring (by which time we might even be landing).

But in the meantime, I feel that the closer we get to our goal, the more unattainable it seems. Hubby is now working in a good job 10 mins away for a large IT multinational. He is hoping that he can try for a transfer when the time comes but it all seems so pie in the sky at times. Then there are all those around us who are dedicated to spending the rest of their lives here and can't understand us..... And to top it all, my son has just been offered a place for sep 2007 in a very good secondary school up the road. It's like everything is consipiring to keep us here! (and some of the threads on here don't help, but I know that's a good thing!)

We know (think!) that our 'big picture' is in Canada. We are one of the lucky ones who will have enough money to buy outright plus more, we love the outdoors, the snow, etc etc. On paper it all makes sense. We've thought about this and planned it for so long, yet someimes I feel the dream is slipping away. HELP!

Any tips on holding on to the dream?
(I feel an ELO song coming on - that shows my age!)

Thanks
Snowqueen

Tiaribbon

It is worth it - the wait, the lack of earnings initially, the shock of the cost of things - all that aside, it is still worth it! Hang on to your dream!

R2D2

Its kind of like an addiction.........and its all you think about for so long then WHAM reality hits as it gets closer. We felt torn at times too, wondering wether we were doing the right thing....but the way we looked at it was...............it needn't be forever .............but if we don't do it after all this hard work and preparation, we would have spent the rest of our days wondering what it would have been like. Our kids were the 'right' age, we were at a certain point with regards to our jobs, so the timing was leading us this way, and we are glad we followed our dream now as it is going so well.........fingers crossed it will continue. What I would say though is dig really deep and trust your instincts. Only you know how you really feel deep down.

babyblue

I just wanted to say!
follow your dreams becuase without them what are we?

If you sit back and wonder 'if,but or maybe's' you will always have that on your minds. I came here after selling everything and i was not lucky enough to have a nestegg. I(like so many) have had my fair share of homesick blues. I do beleive there is a better future ahead for me and my children. Things have been exceptionaly tough for me. I am still here after two years. There is something about this country that is warming.
Nobody can decide for you but just come with an open mind and heart. Life is about choices and i am sure you will make the right one.
We can never be sure about anything in life. My daughter is 20 this month and she did not want to come here initially. she was set in college and the whole uni thing was in front of her. She decided it was not for her afterall.
I hope i am making sense?
You never know until you try. I am glad i did and even if i end up back in the UK, i can honestly say it is a great long vacation and experience. At the end of the day, life is about memories and not materialism. I know it helps sometimes but it sounds as if you will be ok!
What about renting here for a while so you don't burn the bridges?
do you own your own home there?
you could rent it out for a while until you are sure this is for you.

I wish you all the best of luck and Just keep your dreams alive.

Cowtown

Excuse me for playing Devil's advocate, so don't take this the wrong way ... good IT job 10 minutes from home ... a place at a good secondary school for your son ... hmmm ... right now as resident Canadian IT guy with two kids in elementary school, that sounds dreamlike to me

Oh ... and snow ... they're threatening us with it overnight ... I've been here long enough not to look forward to the 100+ crashes that Calgary normally gets during its first snow dump of the year ... if it snows, I'll be leaving well before 7am to make sure I get to work for 8am.

Tangram

Nice reality check Cowtown.

Cowtown

The thought of an IT job ten minutes from home ... I had one of those once in the UK ... bliss

CalgaryBlade

Well my "good IT job" is 20 mins from home, the snow doesn't usually affect the C-Train and the secondary school choice around here is very good. Especially if they choose late immersion or we play the Catholic card.

Tangram

Actually schools strangely enough play a part in our potential move. Not that I am saying any schools here against there are better or worse, but the one lined up for us here is appalling and so we would need to move catchments up into the Cotswolds to get a better school. It was at that point that we thought " hey, if we are moving anyway, we might try another country " or so the logic went as we were already considering Canada. All is mute without a job, but it certainly played its part. As for everything else, we don't hate the UK. I have a well paid job 40 min drive away, flexible working hours, bonus, 5 weeks paid holiday and a nice 4 bed house but like many there is always that 'what if' scenario.

But it is good to get the reality check every once in a while. Many things are just 'different', not better not worse but seen and interacted with in a different way. Costs are in the swings and roundabouts area so I do like seeing both the Canada forum and the returning forum. Certain posters you are always guaranteed to get a positive slant from , others balanced and others negative, and you can quickly see who they are afetr a few weeks on here.

Now I'm rambling aren't I ?!?!?!

Anyway, be careful everyone when the snow does eventually arrive - keep safe.

Cowtown

I should have also said my old house was also minutes from the edge of town, as is our current one ... I used to ride the virus tube downtown too, but I prefer to drive nowadays for the sake of my health.

gabics

I am in similar situation here (Chicago). I have my IT resume up on most of the Canadian sites since June. At the beginning of the resume I state that I am looking for IT positions in Canada only. Still, I get about 2 offers a week from Chicago area, NOTHING from Canada! ZIP!
The unemployment rate (according to the statistics) is much lower in Calgary (our main target) than in Chicago, but still nothing from North.

Hey, Cowtown or CalgaryBlade, doesn’t your employer need a great developer??
See… I even try networking…but still no luck.

This has made me think few times... Is it a sign? A warning? Will we regret it?

But then, I have to wake up the next morning at 5:30am to drive 31 miles to work in stop-and-go traffic, it takes sometimes over 1.5 hours.
I am breathing terribly polluted air as my wife and 5 months old son.
After work I will go home to my way overpriced 2br condo where I don't have enough room for my bicycles and skis. On the way home I have to listen W’s speech in the radio.

And most importantly, I will have to drive TWENTY-TWO HOURS to the closest ski hill again this Christmas!!!

I think our dream is still in Canada…

skigordi

Hi
I think your feelings and concerns are very normal and really show you are thinking through the whole thing which is definitely the right thing to do. From my own experience and reading this forum I think you have to give your gut feelings and dreams equal weight as the schools and jobs. I honestly don't think that schools and jobs alone are enough to justify the move...there has to be this elusive 'lifestyle' desire or in our case just a strong desire for change and adventure.....I recognise those 'stay put' friends only too well!

As someone suggested...why not try to rent your home and rent here initially if you can...give yourself time to settle in without feeling like the decision is irrevocable?

Tangram

Not that anyone will be immigrating to any Province in the near future if the thread about backlogs, additional old cases and additional waiting times on the Canada Immigration forum are to be taken into account. ( http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=332163 ) I guess New Zealand here we come ?!?!!? Remind me to change my Flag

JulesinUK

Hi,
I can identify with your concerns. We put our applications in last Dec '04 and were quoted 21 months!!
At the moment, we are in the process of looking around for at sixth forms for our eldest son who does his GCSEs next year, as well as choosing GCSE options for our younger daughter. Part of me realises this has to be done in case the application doesn't come through by next summer, but I do see us in Canada in the great scheme of things! You see your future going two different ways.
I think of going to Canada as a box of chocolates waiting to be unwrapped.They'll be the good times and not so good times like good chocolates and bad ones(if that makes sense ) but if you don't try, you'll never know.
Winter will soon be on the way, and comparing our UK winters with a canadian winter with skiing, iceskating and just walking in that beautiful scenery in the snow, I know what our family all wants!!!!
One of my concerns at the moment, is that we are looking towards the Okanagan area and schools in BC seem to have been on strike for 2 weeks and the children can't go to school. Doesn't bode well!!!
Anyway, I'm rambling on now.!!!

Rich_007

Hi Snowqueen,

Just my own subjective views on your post:

It's only a 'dream' if you're not prepared to get the bad with the good, take it for what it is, and in some respects start from scratch. Converting the 'dream' (which is great for what it is because that's what got most of us on the path to Canada) into a 'planned well thought out reality' will ensure much more chance of success.

It changes from being a dream once you have done the research and understand the details of the pros and cons, good and bad, realise there are a few things that need handling etc. Not an easy one to call but mostly everyone faces these obstacles, either before arriving or after.

If, as in your case, the challenges come before you leave, in terms of better things happening at home for you in the UK, then you have two choices, either reasses the value of the dream, or take the view that they are simply distractions to your dream and that you'll work things out for the long term in Canada. But with the risk that if things get tough in Canada, you may blame your own misfortune and compare to the way things were going, for the better, in the UK. That's a fair old risk, I'd say. Call it a test, how much do you want a life in Canada ? For example, we had a big financial test to pass - reduced UK house sale price, increased Canadian house prices, reduced exchange rate. That hit us hard on paper (and also in reality, for sure) but we 'did it' and don't regret a thing, so I guess many of us get tested in different ways ?

Good luck.

Rich.