Have had another run-in with my 12yr old son last night, over the fact that i refuse to spend £45 on a t-shirt (another must have fashion item!), and lo and behold everybody else's mum popped her head up, I'm sure you've heard it...............Everybody elses mum...lets them stay up to whenever they like, even on a school night, lets them stay out to all hours hanging round the street, buys them £90 trainers (demand feeding in babies yes, demand trainer buying for 12yr olds..No!) doesn't make them do there homework/clean there rooms/help with chores. My question is have you noticed a change in the attitude of yours or friends kids since moving to Canada, have they become less "i want/its my right" or worse with the influence of the states (you know, all that $400 prom dress / large limos and sweet 16's scene) ?

wonderwoman
(who is not everyones elses mum!)

If only one could get a prom dress for $400.

Clothes here are F'ing ridiculous price wise BUT there doesnt seem to be the whole tribal thing whereby you gotta have a certain brand to fit a certain group SO I can only assume (dont have kids of my own) that you save enough over the first 16 years of the kids life to buy the $400+ prom dress\hire the limo\send her away to have the kid fathered by the hockey team captain.

Is there something you want to tell us, dear?

Only that prom dresses and ball gowns run more like $2,500. People bitch about tuition fees but, hon, they're the very tip.

Ouch!

Fortunately my teen is unlikely ever to ask for a prom gown. If he does, we're probably due for a little chat.

Oh yes - they try it on here just the same!

We came up with a great plan though - when they turned about 12/13 instead of buying all their clothes for them, we gave them a large monthly allowance. They had to learn to 'budget'; because out of that allowance, they had to save, buy their own school supplies, clothes, entertainment, and even gifts for birthdays and Christmas etc. Bacically everything except food, shelter, and household related stuff; which we covered. That way - you know exactly what you're paying out each month - they get an introduction to the grown up world of money management, and you never have to have those conflicts again! If they want a $100 shirt, they can have it (if they've figured out how to budget )

Good for you! And your kids!

As much as my family gets under my skin, my parents did the above and I am forever thankful that they did. It taught me a lot about money and real life... fast. And the lessons stuck.

I have this five times over. The latest "demand" is some daft brand of runners (trainers) that cost nearly $200. Yeah right. I have perfected "the look"which means that the kids don't even bother asking again if they get "the look" when they ask for this stuff. Everybody else's Mum can go play with the traffic, after their obnoxious kids have stayed out in their brand named togs until midnight and done the latest drugs. I will stick being the non-compliant bitch-Mom from hell.

Thanks! The only part (and probably the most important ) that they failed on, was the saving! Oh well....... lol You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink!

Being young, you just want to spend, and have fun. So, understandable. Now they are both working full time, running their own cars and learning just how expensive that is.

I would also like to ask others this: Is it my imagination or am I the only 'Canadian' parent that makes their adult kids pay towards their living expenses? It certainly isn't 'rent', or they would be paying three times the amount. They complain about it and say they shouldn't have to (because none of their friends do ) Bloody cheek!

GOOD FOR YOU!!! Quite right!

Am I the only 'kid' that forced my parents to take living expenses OFF me when I was at home and bringing in my own income???

LOL What a perfect son you must have been

Nah I was an arsehole in other ways! I didnt say how I was bringing in an income did I??

My two brothers-in-law (age 29 and 30) both still live at home and neither pay anything toward expenses. I think they buy their own clothes, but that is it. Fine catch they will make some lucky girl one day.