skyturner

As some of you know my canadian partner and I were to be married august 3rd but she ran off with a fella! We are still speaking and she has offered to return to canada with me and our 2 year old son as being seperated, she or her parents will sponsor me. This way the three of us (hopefully just the 3 of us) get to live in canada as planned allbeit seperated. (how easy/hard would a sponsorship be as we are no longer going the spousal route)

I did talke a court order preventing her to remove my son out of the country and she had already vowed she would never do that anyway. However, this seems to be an amicable solution......or is it? my concern is 1/ Is she planning to bring new fella along? 2/ what if I find it is a bad move and end up lost and lonely in an alien country (her parents are fully on my side and advise me their house is mine no matter what).

Dillema!!!

Steve

el_richo

If you're not divorced, go through the spousal route and have her sponsor you. That way the process should be smooth and quick, your son will still have access to you both, and you have the freedom to decide ultimately where you live (UK or canada). Whether the other fella goes over or not doesn't matter because unless he has PR he'll not be eligible for sponsorship from her anyway.

Plus if she sponsors you, and it turns sour, she has to support you for the first 3 years

The above is probably really bad advice but hey......good luck with it all

newshoney

The specifics of applying for PR when no longer cohabiting with your would-be sponsor are probably best answered in the immigration thread by one of the experts.

My two cents: I think if I were in your shoes, I'd be asking myself a) what's best for my son? and then b) where's best for us both? If you are not married it will be highly likely that your child's primary residence will be with his mother. Where is she planning to live? Is she amenable to joint responsibility and co-parenting? The answers to these and many more questions will no doubt guide you in deciding. Who knows... perhaps there could yet be a reconciliation?

Cookie

Firstly, I had a quick look back at your recent posts and you are not planning to move until around 2012 so you have plenty time ahead so make no rash decisions. You also have 2 daughters who will not be moving to Canada and are in fact upset you are even considering emigration. With this in mind, and setting aside the emotional side of things, paying for 2 families and living on your own in Canada will be financially draining.

I also see that your partner is Canadian, therefore your son will have dual nationality. Is she now planning to move back home sooner than 2012? If not, then at least you have time on your side, and a lot can happen in 2 years. If she wants to return to Canada ASAP then you have many things to consider:

• Once your son is in Canada, what are your parental rights because of his dual nationality.
  
• Coping with no family around you in Canada during your separation will be a far more difficult move than a united family emigrating together.
  
• If you and your ex move, what would happen if you couldn't settle, you could indeed be trapped in a country you don't want to live in. You may have to make the choice to return to the UK on your own and this will mean you only seeing your son via webcam and occasional visits. Son versus UK - a horrifying choice to make!
  

If you feel happy enough about staying in the UK for now, then I would not rush into anything at this time. At least in the UK you will see your son on your own turf.

If you really want to emigrate, then remember that you will in fact be emigrating as a 'single' person with shared custody/visitation. Financially, it's going to cost a lot to set up 2 homes too. If emigrating is also your dream then at least make an informed choice.

Lastly, things could get ugly (not surpringly) so you should definitely find out abour parental rights in both the UK and Canada. Once your son is in Canada, then you may have no rights for him to return to the UK.

Wishing you all the best with your future

Greenhill

My suggestion would be to get everything officially covered before leaving the UK. By "everything" I mean the custody order, your Canadian PR and make an agreement regarding any financial matters or asset splits.

If your ex is showing willingness now, use it to get the above; circumstances will likely change when you're over here and you might find it extremely difficult to get what you want.

In the custody order specify all the "what ifs", think of every possible scenario either in Canada or the UK but focus should be on your son's upbringing rather than either your own or your ex's personal needs and desires.

I'm no expert but I doubt CIC would approve a spousal application when the sponsor-to-be is no longer your spouse. There are other routes for PR but I'd strongly advise contacting an immigration lawyer for advice on your options here, at least just for an initial consultation.

christmasoompa

Unless I'm missing something, I can't see how she or her parents would be able to sponsor you in the first place? Her parents certainly can't, and she would only be able to if you were married or common-law partners. There is no option for somebody to sponsor an ex I'm afraid.

So you'd have to get your own visa anyway without her help. Whether it's a good idea for you or not to move to Canada only you can tell, although I would say that if it means you being with your child then it probably is. I'm always gobsmacked when I read of people leaving their children behind in the UK, so good on you for fighting to be with your son!

Best of luck whatever you decide.