Nik M

Hi All
I'm new to this forum, joined today and after reading some of your posts over the past few months I thought I'd share my dilemma with you all.

My story is..... I've been to Canada several times on holiday, loved it and decided to apply for permanent residence three years ago after my marriage broke down. I received my permanent residence visa last Thursday, and although I am excited I also have feelings of conflict. The reason being, I am about to turn 40 years old (I am female), have no children (would like kids), in a relationship with my current partner, who has a business in London, has no intention of moving abroad but wants us to stay together. I have concerns about leaving my family, my relationship and friends to start over again in a completely new country on my own. Furthermore at my age, I am worried about whether there will be good job opportunities in Canada...isn't it better to emigrate in your twenties and thirties??

I will be travelling to Canada in September to spend two weeks and to activate my visa, but I have at least a couple of years before I have to emigrate permanently. My dilemma is, Do I go ? Or do I stay here and pass up the opportunity to live in Canada?

I would really appreciate your thoughts.

Kind regards

Nik M

Almost Canadian

Go, England will still be there if you don't like Canada

SimoneT

Hi Nik M,

Your age should really be of no concern, my OH was 40 when we arrived here a few months ago and it has not hindered him in getting a job. It mostly depends on your trade and where in Canada you are thinking of moving to. As for "should you or shouldn't you", only you know if your current relationship is worth giving up living in Canada. I know that I had some doubts in coming over and starting a whole new life as a family, but I have no regrets; in fact, if we had not done it I am sure I would regret having stayed in the UK! Good luck with whatever you decide to do!

joinerboy

Hi
Welcome to the forum ,
I'd say go for it & find yourself a nice Canadian Chap
regards
joinerboy

Walsh Clan

Hi Nik M,

I presume that when you applied initially you had set reasons why you wanted to go in the first place, have they changed? If yes, then perhaps it's time to re-look the pros and cons, though your initial post sounds as if you are trying to talk yourself out of going.

Only you can answer this one I'm afraid, but the very best of luck whatever you decide.

Moira.

Rob_999

At the very least go and activate your visa - that way you have longer to make a decision.

MartianTom

Hi Nik,
Well, I'm just 50 and have applied. I expect to be about 52 by the time I actually get there (if my application succeeds). Your dilemma is my dilemma, and is also the dilemma faced by probably the majority of people (if they're honest) who find themselves in the same situation. Equally, I share your concerns about family, friends, loved ones. It's a tough decision. Yes, it's true, you'll never know if you don't try... and, of course, it could be the wrong thing. But it needn't necessarily be 'no turning back'. That's not how I'm thinking about it, anyway. If I go, I'm prepared to give it 2 years to see how I feel then.

It's clear your current partner doesn't want to go - but also doesn't want you to split up. So, there's an ultimatum for you. It can't make the decision any easier. He's basically saying, as far as he's concerned, that you can't go. So... at the end of it all, I guess you just have to really listen to what your heart is telling you. Are you happy, on the whole, with what you've got now? Do you think there just might be something else in life - the thing that prompted you to apply in the first place? If so, are you prepared to give it a try?

One other thing - and I guess it goes without saying. Holidaying in a country is not the same as actually going there to live. I've also been to Canada several times. I also love it. Can I live there, though? I guess there's only one way I'm going to find out....

As you've said, you've got a couple of years. Perhaps, if you're uncertain now, you could wait a bit and see if things change. A lot can happen in that time.

Good luck with your decision, anyway.

englishrose1

Firstly welcome to the forum and hopefully you will get lots of useful tips. advice and support.

I can understand your dilemma. It is frightening to think of going to a new country on your own. Like you I have always wanted to emmigrate to canada and getting to the end of the visa process. I went to toronto in April on a reccie trip and I came back with mixed views. I really want to move over to canada but for the first time during the whole process. I was rethinking my options. After a few weeks of being back the country though the reasons I want to go are back. So I guess it was a case of nerves. Go on a reccie trip see how you feel, you have some time once you have landed. Good luck

Nik M

Thank you all so much for your views on my particular situation. You have definitely given me food for thought, especially your views Martian Tom.

I think deep down I know that I have to give it a shot in Canada, otherwise I will regret it......so 2011 may be the year I take the plunge.

Once again thank you all.

Nik M x

Simon Legree

You go girl !!

MartianTom

Re: regrets... you might find it interesting to check out this thread - especially Bevm's comments...

http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=612198

bodgerx

Do it.

gibsonslanding

welcome......

itches need scratching.......

my old favorite....'living in a box, watching a box and waiting for a box'! just do it hunny, whats to lose?????