Advice to newcomers from newcomers
Jul 8th 2004 | 10:53 am
#16
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,015
I should reiterate that I know NOTHING about the situation except that someone told me they knew people who had come here earlier this year and were returning to England.
Apart from that I just guessed at what the reasons would be - and the most obvious seemed to be no friends or people weren't friendly - stuff like that, which seemed to be a sort of valid reason - "sort of" because I think like someone else said - its often hard to break into any group in any city. I cannot imagine that England is any different. My aunt moved to a village in Wales and they were treated like "newcomers" for about 20 years and the villagers spoke Welsh so she couldn't understand. I doubt there is any country in the world where the people are more friendly than Canadians - once you have got to know them.
Whether you are Canadian or an ex-pat - no matter where you came from - I am sure that there are very few immigrants who feel an alliance to Canada in the first . . . maybe 5 years or more.
I have seen posts on this board and others where people are complaining about how they can't find Marmite or self-raising flour or the chocolate doesn't taste the same or the beer is no good. But I don't think people would ever go back for those reasons.
I just want to say to anybody who reads these posts - give Canada a chance before you decide it isn't for you - even if you absolutely HATE it for the first couple of years - hang in there and you might find you change your opinion.
Apart from that I just guessed at what the reasons would be - and the most obvious seemed to be no friends or people weren't friendly - stuff like that, which seemed to be a sort of valid reason - "sort of" because I think like someone else said - its often hard to break into any group in any city. I cannot imagine that England is any different. My aunt moved to a village in Wales and they were treated like "newcomers" for about 20 years and the villagers spoke Welsh so she couldn't understand. I doubt there is any country in the world where the people are more friendly than Canadians - once you have got to know them.
Whether you are Canadian or an ex-pat - no matter where you came from - I am sure that there are very few immigrants who feel an alliance to Canada in the first . . . maybe 5 years or more.
I have seen posts on this board and others where people are complaining about how they can't find Marmite or self-raising flour or the chocolate doesn't taste the same or the beer is no good. But I don't think people would ever go back for those reasons.
I just want to say to anybody who reads these posts - give Canada a chance before you decide it isn't for you - even if you absolutely HATE it for the first couple of years - hang in there and you might find you change your opinion.
Jul 8th 2004 | 11:39 am
#17
Just going for Holidays
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 521
From: Paignton, Devon
Not yet, but dont we all retire there? (Unless youre a scouser in which case Southport is where you go to die)
)
Jul 8th 2004 | 1:12 pm
#18
Happy in Canada.
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 1,440
From: Winnipeg, manitoba
gilly1
We didn't have a good experience in our first six months but couldn't go back. Now 5 years on we wouldn't go back.
If you ever decided to move away from home again I'd suggest you get involved community clubs and churches, kids sports, swimming clubs even the local bingo or arts or whatever you like. Go and start talking to people. just say hello, your accent will do the rest. You then just have to start asking questions on where is such and such is or done could they help with information and gradually you make friends. BUT ITS YOU THAT HAS TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE.
We not religous in a god fearing way but Football, with the kids on teams and coaching it has helped us make friends and feel at home.
Ask yourself when you're in Bournemouth how many strangers do you talk to in your circles, how many times do you just go up to a stranger at the beach and talk to them, make them feel invited to Bournemouth?
Hope you have fun and visit the rest of the world again some time.
As for the question on "Why go to Regina ?" we get exactly the same in Winnipeg. Its hot its cold its full of Mosquitos. But is now home.
We didn't have a good experience in our first six months but couldn't go back. Now 5 years on we wouldn't go back.
If you ever decided to move away from home again I'd suggest you get involved community clubs and churches, kids sports, swimming clubs even the local bingo or arts or whatever you like. Go and start talking to people. just say hello, your accent will do the rest. You then just have to start asking questions on where is such and such is or done could they help with information and gradually you make friends. BUT ITS YOU THAT HAS TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE.
We not religous in a god fearing way but Football, with the kids on teams and coaching it has helped us make friends and feel at home.
Ask yourself when you're in Bournemouth how many strangers do you talk to in your circles, how many times do you just go up to a stranger at the beach and talk to them, make them feel invited to Bournemouth?
Hope you have fun and visit the rest of the world again some time.
As for the question on "Why go to Regina ?" we get exactly the same in Winnipeg. Its hot its cold its full of Mosquitos. But is now home.
Jul 8th 2004 | 4:23 pm
#19
Forum Regular
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 161
From: Innisfil, Ontario
Re: Advice to newcomers from newcomers
Originally posted by gilly1
Myself and my husband were very upset to see the thread from Liz about our family returning to the uk. We would like to say that we have friends and family in Regina and have not found that a problem. As for lots of young mums in Regina well as an older woman not in my situation would not know nearly all the mums work full time in Regina and house wives dont exist. I have met plenty of mums who are friendly and want to talk but they are on maternity leave and go back to work with in a year. As for joining church groups, well these don't exist in Regina as far as I have found, except for one that I went to that wanted to convert you to be a jehova which I thought was a bit extreme just to make friends!! Also if regina is such a great place why does everyone you meet here ask why on earth did you come to Regina. My husband had lived here before as a child for 7years so that is why we came here and the fact we already had friends and family here.
Yes we have missed friends and family and things that you cannot get here but if we went home for these reasons it would be a very silly thing to do. I am actually pregnant again hence the quick return home (we have actually been here 6 months not 3 as previously mentioned by Liz), otherwise we may have lasted longer. The feelings we have are that in Regina there is not enough to warrant taking our young children (1 and 2) away from their family and we have learnt that material things in life don't bring happiness.
It has cost us a lot financially coming here and we actually came from Bournemouth in England and as anyone that knows bournemouth would know it is a hard place to beat.
Myself and my husband were very upset to see the thread from Liz about our family returning to the uk. We would like to say that we have friends and family in Regina and have not found that a problem. As for lots of young mums in Regina well as an older woman not in my situation would not know nearly all the mums work full time in Regina and house wives dont exist. I have met plenty of mums who are friendly and want to talk but they are on maternity leave and go back to work with in a year. As for joining church groups, well these don't exist in Regina as far as I have found, except for one that I went to that wanted to convert you to be a jehova which I thought was a bit extreme just to make friends!! Also if regina is such a great place why does everyone you meet here ask why on earth did you come to Regina. My husband had lived here before as a child for 7years so that is why we came here and the fact we already had friends and family here.
Yes we have missed friends and family and things that you cannot get here but if we went home for these reasons it would be a very silly thing to do. I am actually pregnant again hence the quick return home (we have actually been here 6 months not 3 as previously mentioned by Liz), otherwise we may have lasted longer. The feelings we have are that in Regina there is not enough to warrant taking our young children (1 and 2) away from their family and we have learnt that material things in life don't bring happiness.
It has cost us a lot financially coming here and we actually came from Bournemouth in England and as anyone that knows bournemouth would know it is a hard place to beat.
I hope you relish being back in Bournemouth and wish you a happy, safe trip home.
Jul 11th 2004 | 2:19 am
#20
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 481
Originally posted by gilly1
I really dont see why we have to justify our decision on this forum. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and as no one on this forum knows us personally i dont feel you can judge us on ours. My first message was long enough and there are other reasons to us going home but do not have time to type our every thought and feeling. Everyone is different and perhaps if you had had the same feelings we had after 6months you would not be questioning our decision. There are others on the returning to the UK forum who have had just as short a spell overseas so do not feel we are out of the norm.
What we decide is best for our children is our choice and everyone has different parenting ideas. We feel the children are a big part of our decision and had to cover every eventuality in our decision. Granted the children may not want to come back to canada but it would not be because of our experience as it has not been negative in fact it has been the best learning on life i have had. One situation we were faced with is if the child born here wanted to come back to live. The child born here under current rules could only sponsor one sibling to come and live and what if the other could not get through on points. And who knows what the system could be like by the time theyre old enough to know what they want. We did not want to have the weight of being able to split up brothers and sisters hence the reason we felt we would have to stay for 3yrs if this child was born here. Some of you may not agree with this and thats fine but that is a rational thinking behind our early exit.
I really dont see why we have to justify our decision on this forum. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and as no one on this forum knows us personally i dont feel you can judge us on ours. My first message was long enough and there are other reasons to us going home but do not have time to type our every thought and feeling. Everyone is different and perhaps if you had had the same feelings we had after 6months you would not be questioning our decision. There are others on the returning to the UK forum who have had just as short a spell overseas so do not feel we are out of the norm.
What we decide is best for our children is our choice and everyone has different parenting ideas. We feel the children are a big part of our decision and had to cover every eventuality in our decision. Granted the children may not want to come back to canada but it would not be because of our experience as it has not been negative in fact it has been the best learning on life i have had. One situation we were faced with is if the child born here wanted to come back to live. The child born here under current rules could only sponsor one sibling to come and live and what if the other could not get through on points. And who knows what the system could be like by the time theyre old enough to know what they want. We did not want to have the weight of being able to split up brothers and sisters hence the reason we felt we would have to stay for 3yrs if this child was born here. Some of you may not agree with this and thats fine but that is a rational thinking behind our early exit.
Since being back we have been very disappointed with what we have found and I dearly wish that I had listened to all those people who told us to give it a bit longer.
I think the UK that I was missing was the UK i grew up in which sadly doesn't exist anymore. I wish more than anything that it could work in the UK but all the reasons we left in the first place are still there and people just seem to be getting greedier and greedier. We will never be able to afford a house over here and simply don't see a way of getting on the property ladder at all.
I know when you are in a new place that you can experience overwhelming homesickness and that you get really pi**ed off with people telling you that you aren't giving it long enough, but take it from one who knows, it could be better to give these things a bit longer.
having said all of that you may be making the best decision of your lives but I sure regret moving back to the UK, and moving back to NS just doesn't seem possible now which is really annoying when this time last year we lived in a fantastic house and life although at the time seemed frustrating was actually way better than we have here.
Take care
Sonia
Jul 11th 2004 | 5:31 am
#21
Forum Regular
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 241
From: Bath UK to Penticton, Okanagan BC in 2002
Originally posted by daisymoll
Just another two cents worth from someone who has been there and done that. We lived in NS for one year and returned to the UK last December.
Since being back we have been very disappointed with what we have found and I dearly wish that I had listened to all those people who told us to give it a bit longer.
I think the UK that I was missing was the UK i grew up in which sadly doesn't exist anymore. I wish more than anything that it could work in the UK but all the reasons we left in the first place are still there and people just seem to be getting greedier and greedier. We will never be able to afford a house over here and simply don't see a way of getting on the property ladder at all.
I know when you are in a new place that you can experience overwhelming homesickness and that you get really pi**ed off with people telling you that you aren't giving it long enough, but take it from one who knows, it could be better to give these things a bit longer.
having said all of that you may be making the best decision of your lives but I sure regret moving back to the UK, and moving back to NS just doesn't seem possible now which is really annoying when this time last year we lived in a fantastic house and life although at the time seemed frustrating was actually way better than we have here.
Take care
Sonia
Just another two cents worth from someone who has been there and done that. We lived in NS for one year and returned to the UK last December.
Since being back we have been very disappointed with what we have found and I dearly wish that I had listened to all those people who told us to give it a bit longer.
I think the UK that I was missing was the UK i grew up in which sadly doesn't exist anymore. I wish more than anything that it could work in the UK but all the reasons we left in the first place are still there and people just seem to be getting greedier and greedier. We will never be able to afford a house over here and simply don't see a way of getting on the property ladder at all.
I know when you are in a new place that you can experience overwhelming homesickness and that you get really pi**ed off with people telling you that you aren't giving it long enough, but take it from one who knows, it could be better to give these things a bit longer.
having said all of that you may be making the best decision of your lives but I sure regret moving back to the UK, and moving back to NS just doesn't seem possible now which is really annoying when this time last year we lived in a fantastic house and life although at the time seemed frustrating was actually way better than we have here.
Take care
Sonia
I have been following your posts with interest.......last time you said you were considering returning to Canada, is this no longer an option for you? Poor you, I do feel for you as we always make our decisions thinking we are doing the best thing but we just never know how it is going to work out do we? Wish we could have crystal balls, sure would make life easier!
What else has been disappointing for you in the UK?
Anyway keep posting and good luck.
JJ
Jul 11th 2004 | 6:10 am
#22
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 481
Originally posted by joggerjo
Hi
I have been following your posts with interest.......last time you said you were considering returning to Canada, is this no longer an option for you? Poor you, I do feel for you as we always make our decisions thinking we are doing the best thing but we just never know how it is going to work out do we? Wish we could have crystal balls, sure would make life easier!
What else has been disappointing for you in the UK?
Anyway keep posting and good luck.
JJ
Hi
I have been following your posts with interest.......last time you said you were considering returning to Canada, is this no longer an option for you? Poor you, I do feel for you as we always make our decisions thinking we are doing the best thing but we just never know how it is going to work out do we? Wish we could have crystal balls, sure would make life easier!
What else has been disappointing for you in the UK?
Anyway keep posting and good luck.
JJ
Thanks for asking, thats really kind of you.
We are actually coming out to Ontario to visit in Sep, as this is the area we are now conisdering. NS seems to be out as my husbands job is specialised and there a re a limited number of opportunitiesso this is why not that area.
Jul 11th 2004 | 6:56 am
#23
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 481
Originally posted by joggerjo
Hi
I have been following your posts with interest.......last time you said you were considering returning to Canada, is this no longer an option for you? Poor you, I do feel for you as we always make our decisions thinking we are doing the best thing but we just never know how it is going to work out do we? Wish we could have crystal balls, sure would make life easier!
What else has been disappointing for you in the UK?
Anyway keep posting and good luck.
JJ
Hi
I have been following your posts with interest.......last time you said you were considering returning to Canada, is this no longer an option for you? Poor you, I do feel for you as we always make our decisions thinking we are doing the best thing but we just never know how it is going to work out do we? Wish we could have crystal balls, sure would make life easier!
What else has been disappointing for you in the UK?
Anyway keep posting and good luck.
JJ
Thanks for asking, thats really kind of you.
We are actually coming out to Ontario to visit in Sep, as this is the area we are now conisdering. NS seems to be out as my husbands job is specialised and there a re a limited number of opportunitiesso this is why not that area.
Jul 11th 2004 | 2:48 pm
#24
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 3,015
I sure hope things work out for you. I think the main reason why I said people should stick it out for a while even if they don't like it at first is because of the money it costs moving back and forth.
One thing that occurred to me - if you emigrate to Canada and then go back again. If you decide you want to come back to Canada do you have to start all over again or can you just come back on your original "approval" or whatever it was?
One thing that occurred to me - if you emigrate to Canada and then go back again. If you decide you want to come back to Canada do you have to start all over again or can you just come back on your original "approval" or whatever it was?
Jul 11th 2004 | 3:46 pm
#25
Cynically amused.
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 3,648
From: BC
Originally posted by lizwil98
I sure hope things work out for you. I think the main reason why I said people should stick it out for a while even if they don't like it at first is because of the money it costs moving back and forth.
One thing that occurred to me - if you emigrate to Canada and then go back again. If you decide you want to come back to Canada do you have to start all over again or can you just come back on your original "approval" or whatever it was?
I sure hope things work out for you. I think the main reason why I said people should stick it out for a while even if they don't like it at first is because of the money it costs moving back and forth.
One thing that occurred to me - if you emigrate to Canada and then go back again. If you decide you want to come back to Canada do you have to start all over again or can you just come back on your original "approval" or whatever it was?
