Too far from the UK
Aug 11th 2011, 9:23 pm
#31
Sunny Sydney
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Sydney
Posts: 6,241
Re: Too far from the UK
I love Australia (mostly) but today it just feels like it is too far away.
My dad has just been diagnosed with inoperable cancer of the prostate which has spread to his hip and spine.
So what the local doctor called a torn muscle, was actually a fractured hip and cancer. Thanks NHS- he had to go private to get pain meds and MRI scans and has been housebound for months. My poor sister, who at 43 has had a stroke, has been looking after my dad and my mum (who has been very ill with shingles and an eye op). They live on opposite sides of Wiltshire and so she has to scurry around between houses and her job and is stressed out. My brother helps when he can.
I wish I could be there to help, but I have MS and as my sister says, what could I do?
Australia is too far away.
My dad has just been diagnosed with inoperable cancer of the prostate which has spread to his hip and spine.
So what the local doctor called a torn muscle, was actually a fractured hip and cancer. Thanks NHS- he had to go private to get pain meds and MRI scans and has been housebound for months. My poor sister, who at 43 has had a stroke, has been looking after my dad and my mum (who has been very ill with shingles and an eye op). They live on opposite sides of Wiltshire and so she has to scurry around between houses and her job and is stressed out. My brother helps when he can.
I wish I could be there to help, but I have MS and as my sister says, what could I do?
Australia is too far away.
Aug 17th 2011, 9:16 am
#32
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2008
Location: Sydney, NSW
Posts: 7,580
Re: Too far from the UK
Had a phone call yesterday from my sister. Dad has been taken into hospital, as he is so confused he is dangerous- neighbour caught him at 6:30am trying to drive his car to my sister's as he thought she was in trouble, but he couldn't remember how to drive and he'd locked himself out of the house. He has magic pants with trackers in the knees and his bed keeps rearranging itself so that he is trying to make it all the time.
Doctors think the cancer has spread to the brain. They asked sis if she wanted him resuscitated. She had to ask me what I thought. I said no, as hed still be in pain and have no quality of life.
Now I feel dreadful.
Doctors think the cancer has spread to the brain. They asked sis if she wanted him resuscitated. She had to ask me what I thought. I said no, as hed still be in pain and have no quality of life.
Now I feel dreadful.
Aug 17th 2011, 11:13 am
#33
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2005
Location: Limerick-Shropshire- Perth.
Posts: 3,215
Re: Too far from the UK
Had a phone call yesterday from my sister. Dad has been taken into hospital, as he is so confused he is dangerous- neighbour caught him at 6:30am trying to drive his car to my sister's as he thought she was in trouble, but he couldn't remember how to drive and he'd locked himself out of the house. He has magic pants with trackers in the knees and his bed keeps rearranging itself so that he is trying to make it all the time.
Doctors think the cancer has spread to the brain. They asked sis if she wanted him resuscitated. She had to ask me what I thought. I said no, as hed still be in pain and have no quality of life.
Now I feel dreadful.
Doctors think the cancer has spread to the brain. They asked sis if she wanted him resuscitated. She had to ask me what I thought. I said no, as hed still be in pain and have no quality of life.
Now I feel dreadful.
Last edited by irishbloo; Aug 17th 2011 at 12:51 pm.
Aug 17th 2011, 11:40 am
#34
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: Too far from the UK
Had a phone call yesterday from my sister. Dad has been taken into hospital, as he is so confused he is dangerous- neighbour caught him at 6:30am trying to drive his car to my sister's as he thought she was in trouble, but he couldn't remember how to drive and he'd locked himself out of the house. He has magic pants with trackers in the knees and his bed keeps rearranging itself so that he is trying to make it all the time.
Doctors think the cancer has spread to the brain. They asked sis if she wanted him resuscitated. She had to ask me what I thought. I said no, as hed still be in pain and have no quality of life.
Now I feel dreadful.
Doctors think the cancer has spread to the brain. They asked sis if she wanted him resuscitated. She had to ask me what I thought. I said no, as hed still be in pain and have no quality of life.
Now I feel dreadful.
Aug 17th 2011, 12:49 pm
#35
Joined: May 2006
Location: in the Sydney asylum
Posts: 20,690
Re: Too far from the UK
so sorry to hear this carolne but really besides just sitting with him for a bit you wouldnt be able to do much if you were there in person.
It's a shame we cant all be in 2 places at once!
sending much love and big hugs chin up babe xxx (hug)
It's a shame we cant all be in 2 places at once!
sending much love and big hugs chin up babe xxx (hug)
Aug 17th 2011, 5:33 pm
#37
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 15,526
Re: Too far from the UK
Good luck Caroline.... hope you get through this as peacefully as possible.
Aug 17th 2011, 6:36 pm
#38
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2008
Location: Sydney, NSW
Posts: 7,580
Re: Too far from the UK
Thanks everyone. Waiting for news of brain scans. Can't afford to go back to see him and then again for the funeral, unless he is going to live for another 2 years, which I very much doubt.
My sister has taken the keys away, and is looking into respite care/how she nd the family can look after him if he is a little bit less confused. She doesn't want to put him in a home, but she may have no choice. So his little house will have to be sold if that is the case.
My sister has taken the keys away, and is looking into respite care/how she nd the family can look after him if he is a little bit less confused. She doesn't want to put him in a home, but she may have no choice. So his little house will have to be sold if that is the case.
Aug 21st 2011, 9:35 am
#39
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2008
Location: Sydney, NSW
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Re: Too far from the UK
Some better news- no cancer in the brain, but they have not found what is causing the delusions, though they now think it might be an infection which didn't show up on the initial bloodwork. Dad is getting a bit aggressive apparently. I hope that the heavy antibiotics can stop that, or he'll never be able to go home.
Aug 21st 2011, 10:30 am
#40
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Joined: Dec 2006
Location: Mt Martha, Melbourne
Posts: 1,199
Re: Too far from the UK
That's good news!
He may be very dehydrated, my Nan used to get it both at home and in hospital and she used to halucinate etc or maybe he needs a bit more oxygen?
Lets hope the antibotics work if it is an infection.
He may be very dehydrated, my Nan used to get it both at home and in hospital and she used to halucinate etc or maybe he needs a bit more oxygen?
Lets hope the antibotics work if it is an infection.
Aug 24th 2011, 9:05 am
#41
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2008
Location: Sydney, NSW
Posts: 7,580
Re: Too far from the UK
Antibiotics not working. Waiting for news of the biopsy results.
Aug 24th 2011, 9:43 am
#42
Sunny Sydney
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Sydney
Posts: 6,241
Re: Too far from the UK
Aug 24th 2011, 9:52 am
#43
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Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 398
Re: Too far from the UK
Caroline, I've only just read this. I'm so sorry. I have internet for another week, so I'll leave my computer on and skype logged on when I'm around if you want to chat.
Big hugs from us all.
. I have internet for another week, so I'll leave my computer on and skype logged on when I'm around if you want to chat.Big hugs from us all.
Aug 24th 2011, 12:28 pm
#44
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Jun 2008
Location: Roseville, North Sydney
Posts: 909
Re: Too far from the UK
So sorry to hear about this Caroline I too feel the distance and have a sick mum.....
I can't think of anything to say that would help, but I am thinking of you.
I too feel the distance and have a sick mum.....I can't think of anything to say that would help, but I am thinking of you.
Aug 24th 2011, 4:35 pm
#45
Forum Regular
Joined: Nov 2008
Location: Fremantle, WA
Posts: 76
Re: Too far from the UK
Some better news- no cancer in the brain, but they have not found what is causing the delusions, though they now think it might be an infection which didn't show up on the initial bloodwork. Dad is getting a bit aggressive apparently. I hope that the heavy antibiotics can stop that, or he'll never be able to go home.
