Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

In that case I change to leave it.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Instead of wasting the money on him, you're prepared to waste the energy. I don't think that's right.

I don't know the background to your situation but I think it's important for you to realise that, regardless of how you got here, you are responsible for your own life. If that means 2k on a divorce then do it. The cost of not doing that would be higher I think.

You'll probably experience a great relief after getting it all sorted.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

If everything financial amd children are sorted do it yourself. Easy as. I did my friends for her last year. Gets it all over and done with and then you can look forward and not back

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Was that in Oz? Even though we were married in UK is it 'easy' to divorce here? If I actually thought I 'could' DIY then I think I could talk myself into it. But if I get my hopes up, get all the stuff online and begin the proceedings and then find (as I did with the consent orders) that it proves 'not as easy as all that' - I would be devastated and get really upset and stressed.

I am not stupid and I honestly thought I could do the consent orders but in the end it was getting silly. I even copied my friends consent orders and replaced my financial situation with hers - and the court still wouldn't process it - i sometimes think they want to have a solicitor involved.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

It was in Oz. I agree that Consent Orders etc can be more complicated. If you want help or unsure pm me

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Don't think of it like that, think of it as spending the money on yourself, for your peace of mind and future. Forget about him especially if he's a lazy arse who'll continue like this for years. It's not giving in to him, it's what you want.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Get it over with and go for the divorce. It would be a real bugger if anything happened to you and because you were still legally married he was able to claim from your estate. With Hebe's help you can DIY and you'll have complete freedom and never have to think about him ever again.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Thanks - I am going to print off the DIY stuff now and have a read of it - Hebe's has offered to help me out if get stuck...lets hope this is plain sailing...I don't even know his address anymore.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Step daughter must know surely? What about Tom, is he in contact with him?

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Tom has no idea - and despises him...so no joy there. Step-daughter probably know, although she is very keen to 'not get involved' - if she gave me his address then he would give her a hard time for talking/keeping in touch with me.

LOL I laugh because step-daughter and I are very close indeed - and he is the one missing out - but he still has this hold on her and I can't understand this. She is 21 almost 22 yrs old, pregnant with her first child and she is still afraid of her dad (on second thoughts - i can understand this)...

I do have rellies address in Canberra/Sutton so I could mail it there for attention of. What do you think?

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

For ease of proceeding I think you have to. You can't move on completely until it's done and dusted. He doesn't need to know who's passed the address on. Let's face it you could have got a PI on to it who would probably be able to get it in a short time anyway.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Can it be registered post, could you send to his work address?

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Problem is that if you did win a lot of money, as you are still marrried to him, he just might be able to grab some of it. I would get it all over with.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

I agree - and I have just kind of got my answer anyhow I think....I still had his mobile so I sent a text to find out if/when divorce proceedings - as I hadn't heard anything from him and did he require anything - He did ask for the marraige cert a while ago but I stubbornly refused telling him to get off his arse and get his own copy.

Well apparently he did and he has done nothing with it - his reply from the text message is nasty and not worth repeating - so I suppose if I don't have his address from himself - I will have to ask step-daughter. Hope she has it as he moved a few months ago.

What a piece of work - you live with someone for so long yet you never realise quite what they are capable of.

Re: Should I or shouldn't I ?
 

Hi Sarah,

As you know I have just gone through an Aussie divorce. It was all pretty straight forward and I didn't need a solicitor.

It cost me $540 to lodge the paperwork online. We did a joint application, but I paid for the whole thing - well it was me who wanted (needed) the divorce so I could re-marry. :lol:

All the court needs is to be satisfied that you have tried to contact him and let him know that you have filed for divorce. If you don't know where he lives, then you may need to sign a stat dec or something, but that should be straight forward.

Since you have been married over 2 years, have no dependent kids and have been separated for over 2 years, there's not really any grounds for them to not grant it, so it will be really easy.

these links are all you need:

http://www.familylawcourts.gov.au/wp...on+and+Divorce

https://www.comcourts.gov.au/pip/sam...%0A&ByName=pas