The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

The "offside rule" explained for women...

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till.
Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also & is eyeing them with desire.
Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.

Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes!

At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, "whilst it is in flight" you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes!

BUT, you must always remember that until the purse has "actually been thrown", it would be plain wrong to be in front of the other shopper!

NOW DO YOU GET IT?!!

:cool:

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Simplicity itself!!! Thank you!

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Gosh thank you. Will sleep easier in bed tonight :rolleyes: :D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

I'm a bloke. I fully understand the off-side rule. What I don't get is why anyone could get any enjoyment from a game that's played by wankers and (largely) supported by tools.

Just my opinion mind. I'm a Five-Live listener, honest.

:D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

I couldn't agree with you more.

What really gets up my nose, is the wankers earn massive salaries as well. :mad:

and the tools pay a fortune to watch the wankers. :confused:

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Glad that you explained it to me as I need to know what is going on on the pitch to help the boss when Holland start their path to winning the World Cup :D
Nicky

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

So what code are we talking about here? How many codes have an offside rule? :confused:

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

That's AFL for you, what can you do? :D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Don't worry about it MrsD ;) It's a sad game, played everywhere, but no where near as entertaining as AFL :D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

In one sentance I have managed to go off you for life ...

A real pity.

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

In one sentance I have managed to go off you for life ...

A real pity.

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Calm down mate. ;)

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Nicky you're with the winning team, of course you get it. :)

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Ah, the beautiful game. The offside rule explained for the weeker sex. Gotta love it. :D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

It's not for girls ...

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Bugger the AFL, I was worried they were talking about rugby league, if it's soccer they are talking about I agree with Hutch ;) :D .

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

I agree with Hutch, bunch of overpaid, ponytailed nancy boys rolling around in agony every time they break a fingernail.

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

OK then, explain to me why you would be in a queue for the till if you've no purse in the first place? Wouldn't you be with your friend who is trying on shoes, offering your opinion? :p

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

that would be spelt 'weaker', oh strong one :rolleyes:

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Does this have anything to do with hockey? :confused:

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Something a teacher told me hundreds of years ago at school:

The weaker sex is the stronger sex
because of the weakness of the stronger sex
for the weaker sex :D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Ahhhhhh, so you don't just look that old, you really are that old? :p :D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

Indeed. I can't believe how everytime the ball goes out,everyone says "mine" like they honestly belive the ball is theirs. Last time, I checked, if you kicked the ball out, then the ball is the opposition's.

Even worse is the way they talk to the referees. In rugby union, and league, on a decision, generally the captain will approach the ref and ask for an explanation. I'd give the poofterball lot the red card the moment they stepped out of line with their mass hysterics. In rugby union, you talkback, you get 10 metres.

Poofterball players are like children in many ways. It ruins a perfectly good sport, otherwise 'beautiful'. Quite unwatchable. Apart form World Cups where there is a bit of novelty.
:D

Re: The Offside Rule Explained For Women
 

The sad thing is that the antics of players like Wayne Rooney, reacting badly to referees decisions, is witnessed by the nation's youngsters who idolise these dickheads, who see them as role models.