Dorothy

Not saying that's not fine for some of us, but it sounds like the OP has already answered her own questions. The adventure was just that for us. We weren't particularly close to my family and my husband has been estranged from his for nearly 20 years. We were both in dead end jobs, tired of a 2 hour commute and really wanted to try something new. It sounds like the OP has it pretty sweet where she is so why give all that up when she's not sure? Australia is always going to be here for long vacations if that's what they want to do.

comet555

While I appreciate the sentiment as that's what we did ourselves, I should point out that the adventure and newness of it all will eventually fade. Then you just have real life again in a different place. When we first arrived we were quite often in tourist mode checking things out, this phase probably lasted about a year and a half or so. I notice that BAY has been in Oz just over a year now, so still a bit in the honeymoon phase

Now most of our time is spent with work or taking care of the kids. Many of the weekends we would like to get away are now spent doing lessons or going to birthday parties, etc. We still do get away although it's more for something to do rather than an adventure.

In our case we did come for something different and for a bit of adventure, we figured we'd give it a couple of years and see what happened. While I don't regret coming here and I've loved almost every minute of it we will probably go back to Canada next year. I love Australia and always will, but right now our family is in Canada and it would be nice to live near them for a change (we lived very far from family before we left).

In the case of the original poster I would definitely be making a big list of pros and cons for each. Normally I'm all for a bit of adventure and trying things out, but in this case with elderly parents I might be more prone to suggest waiting a couple of years to see how things pan out, that is if they'd still have the option of going at that time.

RAG62

Hi
Your situation is not dissimilar to the thread I started recently - see:
http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=629691

so I can understand your dilemma.
However, a big difference I feel is that you are very close also to family that are your own age and you see an awful lot of them. This is great and by the sounds of things would certainly make me question why I would want to move so far from them all when they gave me so much pleasure. The rewards of living in Oz would have to be very high to outweigh the daily close contact I had with my family.

Consider things very carefully before you commit yourself too much. Good luck whichever you choose.
Richard

vicki78

I think if you rely on your family that much you might well be struggling without family support over here.
Moving to another country is tough enough for even those who is not coming from a close knit family.

lesleybruck

you hve really made me think, what you had to say was very valuable thank you. thank you all for replying, i do hve a good life, business and a lovely home and want my children to hve the same. im very lucky to hve such close bond with family and perhaps i dont appreciate that for what it is. i will think long and hard before we make the decission. thank u all.

RenShen

Our UK situation as very much like the OP's. We had great family, fab friends, lovely house, the whole lot. But, we moved for a different future, not for what we had already. What we had in the UK was never going to change and we felt like we wanted to experience a bit more. We have still got the lovely family and friends, they are just a bit further away thats all. We feel that the trade off is worth it for us. I am already seeing the benefits in my children. They are learning to be adaptable, make new friends, try new things and they are taking it all in their stride and having a ball. We keep in touch with everybody via the net and yes, I miss them, but I still feel we are doing the right thing. I suppose I am lucky not to have the real pain of home sickness that I read about on here but I am not a cold person. Occasionally I have a "moment" but to be honest I had them in the UK too. Its very easy to blame a low patch here on home sickness but lets be honest, we all have low points now and again, no matter where we are living.

From what you have said, yes you have a great life in the UK but there is still something in your mind saying that Australia would be worth a try. You have to decide if you are going to act on it or not. If you are, just go for it. If you are not, try to settle and not let it bother you any more. To carry on for too long feeling the way you do is not healthy.

Hope you make the right decision for you and your family.
Ren xx

RenShen

Meant to add, we were on the beach at 9am on Sunday morning when the youngest joined Nippers (Surf Lifesaving Club). We reminded ourselves that if we were living in the UK we would be working our arses off all year, looking forward to 2 weeks of this. Now here, we have it every single weekend. That is worth a lot.

lesleybruck

thanks re, u r so write i really need to bring this to a conclusion as it is making me ill, i worry about leaving i worry about staying, how on earth r my kids going to afford what we hve, there is nothing left here its really going to pot my poor niece has had to sign on the dole to day and its broke her heart she was brought up to pay ur own way and work, but there is just nothing around anymore and i dont c a light at the end of a tunnel when it will change, i feel its my duty to try something else for my kids. But i cant make that break from my family, guilt on both ways, letting kids down if dont go, letting family down if do. My mom doesnt want me to go, my sisters dont want me to go but say i must do what i feel is best, my dad says go do it make some life for your kids as they hve no future here. what really kills me is if i called home and they said we just of to the pub together or going away on holiday together and i wont be there with them, i feel a bit like there lives should stop if im not there, how dare they carry on as normal without me, i know thats daft but i suppose would feel left out. decisions decisions.

RenShen

I can only say that from my experience its refreshing to live in a country that seems to be more forward thinking. For example, in the 60s in the UK it was common to have apprenticeships etc. Its like that here still. Tax - in the UK years ago there were loads of different allowances and relief to encourage investment, property maintenance etc - its like that here still. Even in the economic slow down people still talk of growth and future wealth. This is what I want for my kids. And before people jump to point out how backward Australia is in terms of shopping, internet, kids fashion etc, I actually don't think thats a bad thing for the kids either. Where I lived in the UK (the Wirral) all the teenage boys looked the same. Tracksuits, hoodies, shaved heads. The same "white blackman" walk of bouncing on one leg and dragging one arm behind them (wtf is that all about!!) Here the teens are allowed to be far more individual. Some have highlights in their hair, some have it short, some have it long. Some wear the skinny jeans, some wear boardies. Some wear trainers, some (loads) just wear thongs (flip flops to you and me). There seems to be much less pressure to conform and far less respect is given to branded clothing.
My youngest is 10 and in the UK he would be swatting for the 11plus exam and school entrance exams. I know that the schools here are far less stressful and he is feeling the benefits. My eldest is so much more relaxed and chilled out than when we lived in the UK. In general, I find the teens here to be far less aggressive than where we lived.

Thats just my perspective, but for my kids its been the best thing that we have ever done for them.

Grayling

Strange....I think that about here

I suppose it depends on what you are used to.

Fortunately I came from a nice part of the UK.

BonnieH

I think it is a very tough decision but ultimatly it's down to you both to weigh up the pro's and cons............it sounds like you have a very close family so it's going to be difficult.

I went through the same thing, my sister, her husband and kids wen to Oz in 2005 and we were inseperable...we'd do everything together and see them everyday so when they decided they wanted to leave I was broken hearted and to this day I miss them so much.....but once they went and I seen the pictures of the beautiful places they went to at weekends, the smiles on the kids faces and seeing how well they did over there...I realised that my sadness went and I was proud that they took the plunge. Yes I still miss them but I'm content in knowing that my sis and her family are really happy and have things and do things which they'd never be able to do here.

We email each other everyday, chat online when we can and I visited them a few years ago.....and I can see why they did it.

This is a big decision to make and you need to think long and hard about it, If you think that in 10-20 years time youl be happy in the UK then stay...if not then follow the dream! Kids are very good at adjusting, it's just us adults that take a bit longer

Hope it works out for you, it did for my sister and I'm following her soon!
Goodluck! xxx

sue1964

We came out here 10 years ago with 2 children 3-7 it was my something i had always wanting to do after travelling round OZ 20 years earlier.
It was the most heart breaking thing leaving our family as children so close to grandparents.
Yes we have a lovely house and a great life style,but is that worth taking the kids away from family no its not as kids not bothered what type of house they live in.
So yes I would come even if its for 2 years get citizenship then the kids have the choice when they are older and so do you.GOOD LUCK!!

comet555

It's now 4 years for citizenship. The rule changed in 2007.