It seems in this time of world poverty and hunger and third world countries being ripped apart by civil unrest we are forgetting what is important in life.

In the deepest part of the BE Forest lies a very little known, and equally as minutely hung poster by the name of Kporte.

This creature may not be well known to many of the frequent explorers of this site, but he is a rare species, who when aroused will flood you with explicit double-entendres, but is equally as likely to bring common sense to a thread and offer a very well balanced opinion. Never does he resort to judging people, regardless of differing opinion and I strongly believe that we need to do all we can to save this species from extinction.

In good old British fashion I think we should have a telathon to keep this cherished and unfortunately hung animal on our land.

ScottishCelts has already pledged that she will go topless. "So what" and "What? Again?" I hear you say. This time she will do the act while performing a traditional highland jig with God Save The Queen playing in the background while wearing a Rangers shirt as a skirt.

SallyClaire has pledged never to go topless again.

I have pledged 10 inches of my god given gift to Kporte so that he too can measure up to my donkey features.

I am looking for more pledges.

You can donate here

www.savesmuttykporte.org/pledgeussomesmut

We will accept anime smut too if you are looking for something to pledge Vash

I'll get back to you on that.

BernieBoy has just pledged to say one nice thing about British Squaddies.

And I've just received a call from a little girl called Emelems who has pledged to cease sending me explicit photos of herself. Ahhh, what a sweetheart!

Come on guys, we need your support! Get pledging!

Moved as I am by your incredible act of empathetic charity, I'm happy to pledge 3 male teenagers.

I know, I know, I'm just too damn generous.

They, more than anyone else I can think of, would appreciate his smutastical abilities

I'm sure Kporte would be more than willing to give them an induction into the art of numb-armed masterbation

Ah, we're just joking SCY. We love your vertically challenged and jaundiced milkers really!

Well.....ummmm.....since it's Kporte, I may be persuaded to donate a pair of my used undies....






but only the scraggy grey old M&S navel-high briefs I've been using for a car rag these last couple of months

Any good?

That will do nicely! There is a shortage of facemasks in these swine flu times so I am sure he will be grateful for the donation.

Just send them to me and I will make sure they get to him

You are aware that I am at a low point at the moment but still felt the need to comment on the unfortunate size of my "organ of love"
I can only hope that your promise of the girls "getting them out", comes to pass, so that there is some small nugget of light in my otherwise currently dark world.

Ladies, you heard the man! Do you worst.