Hurricane Shazza in Essex!!!!
May 2nd 2006, 9:19 pm
#1
Nicest member ( I think)
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Moggill, Brisbane
Posts: 1,030
Hurricane Shazza in Essex!!!!
>Hurricane Shazza hit in the early hours of Monday. Epicentre:Basildon,
>Essex.
>
>Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering 'faaackinell'.
>
>The hurricane decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of
damage.
>
>
>Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and
Spanish
>Costas were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out
cars
>were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros
arrived.
>
>Essex FM reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
bewildered,
>still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting
had
>happened in Basildon.
>
>One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5, said,
"Jesus!
>It was a well big shock, d'ya know what I mean?
>Me lil' Chardonnay-Mercedes come runnin into me bedroom cryin. Me
youngest
>two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm, slept froo it all, d'ya know what I
>mean?
>I was still shakin when I was watchin Trisha the next morning. Ya know
what
>I mean don't ya?"
>
>Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as
normal.
>
>The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
>Delight to the area to help the stricken locals.
>Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found
large
>quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery
from
>Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.
>
>HOW CAN YOU HELP?
>This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
>unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster.
>Clothing is most sought after.
>Items most needed include:
>
>- Louis Vuitton or Burberry baseball caps
>- Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
>- Shell suits (female)
>- White sport socks
>- Rockport boots
>- Any other items usually sold in Primark.
>
>Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
>
>Required foodstuffs include:
>- Microwave meals
>- Oven chips
>- Chicken Dippers
>- Tins of baked beans
>- Ice cream
>- Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
>
>22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms.
>Chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks, enough for a family of 9.
>£5 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of
those
>affected.
>
>**Breaking news**
>Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry
alcopop.
>"Where are you bleeding from?" they asked - "Romford, mate" said the
>girl, "Woss that gotta do wiv it?"
>
>
>
>
>Apologies to anyone from that area ;-)
>Essex.
>
>Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering 'faaackinell'.
>
>The hurricane decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of
damage.
>
>
>Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and
Spanish
>Costas were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out
cars
>were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros
arrived.
>
>Essex FM reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
bewildered,
>still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting
had
>happened in Basildon.
>
>One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5, said,
"Jesus!
>It was a well big shock, d'ya know what I mean?
>Me lil' Chardonnay-Mercedes come runnin into me bedroom cryin. Me
youngest
>two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm, slept froo it all, d'ya know what I
>mean?
>I was still shakin when I was watchin Trisha the next morning. Ya know
what
>I mean don't ya?"
>
>Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as
normal.
>
>The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
>Delight to the area to help the stricken locals.
>Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found
large
>quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery
from
>Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.
>
>HOW CAN YOU HELP?
>This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
>unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster.
>Clothing is most sought after.
>Items most needed include:
>
>- Louis Vuitton or Burberry baseball caps
>- Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
>- Shell suits (female)
>- White sport socks
>- Rockport boots
>- Any other items usually sold in Primark.
>
>Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
>
>Required foodstuffs include:
>- Microwave meals
>- Oven chips
>- Chicken Dippers
>- Tins of baked beans
>- Ice cream
>- Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
>
>22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms.
>Chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks, enough for a family of 9.
>£5 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of
those
>affected.
>
>**Breaking news**
>Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry
alcopop.
>"Where are you bleeding from?" they asked - "Romford, mate" said the
>girl, "Woss that gotta do wiv it?"
>
>
>
>
>Apologies to anyone from that area ;-)
May 2nd 2006, 9:22 pm
#2
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: at the bottom of a wine glass
Posts: 28,176
Re: Hurricane Shazza in Essex!!!!
Very funny 
May 2nd 2006, 9:24 pm
#3
Account Closed
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 29,154
Re: Hurricane Shazza in Essex!!!!
Lol
May 2nd 2006, 9:29 pm
#4
Nicest member ( I think)
Thread Starter
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Moggill, Brisbane
Posts: 1,030
Re: Hurricane Shazza in Essex!!!!
How do you know when an Essex girl has an orgasm?
She drops her chips!
She drops her chips!
May 2nd 2006, 10:57 pm
#5
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Apr 2006
Location: Ballarat
Posts: 7,005
Re: Hurricane Shazza in Essex!!!!
Originally Posted by meelie
>Hurricane Shazza hit in the early hours of Monday. Epicentre:Basildon,
>Essex.
>
>Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering 'faaackinell'.
>
>The hurricane decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of
damage.
>
>
>Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and
Spanish
>Costas were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out
cars
>were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros
arrived.
>
>Essex FM reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
bewildered,
>still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting
had
>happened in Basildon.
>
>One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5, said,
"Jesus!
>It was a well big shock, d'ya know what I mean?
>Me lil' Chardonnay-Mercedes come runnin into me bedroom cryin. Me
youngest
>two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm, slept froo it all, d'ya know what I
>mean?
>I was still shakin when I was watchin Trisha the next morning. Ya know
what
>I mean don't ya?"
>
>Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as
normal.
>
>The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
>Delight to the area to help the stricken locals.
>Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found
large
>quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery
from
>Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.
>
>HOW CAN YOU HELP?
>This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
>unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster.
>Clothing is most sought after.
>Items most needed include:
>
>- Louis Vuitton or Burberry baseball caps
>- Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
>- Shell suits (female)
>- White sport socks
>- Rockport boots
>- Any other items usually sold in Primark.
>
>Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
>
>Required foodstuffs include:
>- Microwave meals
>- Oven chips
>- Chicken Dippers
>- Tins of baked beans
>- Ice cream
>- Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
>
>22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms.
>Chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks, enough for a family of 9.
>£5 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of
those
>affected.
>
>**Breaking news**
>Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry
alcopop.
>"Where are you bleeding from?" they asked - "Romford, mate" said the
>girl, "Woss that gotta do wiv it?"
>
>
>
>
>Apologies to anyone from that area ;-)
>Essex.
>
>Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering 'faaackinell'.
>
>The hurricane decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of
damage.
>
>
>Several priceless collections of mementos from the Balearics and
Spanish
>Costas were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out
cars
>were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros
arrived.
>
>Essex FM reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
bewildered,
>still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting
had
>happened in Basildon.
>
>One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5, said,
"Jesus!
>It was a well big shock, d'ya know what I mean?
>Me lil' Chardonnay-Mercedes come runnin into me bedroom cryin. Me
youngest
>two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Storm, slept froo it all, d'ya know what I
>mean?
>I was still shakin when I was watchin Trisha the next morning. Ya know
what
>I mean don't ya?"
>
>Apparently though, looting, muggings and car crime did carry on as
normal.
>
>The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny
>Delight to the area to help the stricken locals.
>Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found
large
>quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery
from
>Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.
>
>HOW CAN YOU HELP?
>This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those
>unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster.
>Clothing is most sought after.
>Items most needed include:
>
>- Louis Vuitton or Burberry baseball caps
>- Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
>- Shell suits (female)
>- White sport socks
>- Rockport boots
>- Any other items usually sold in Primark.
>
>Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.
>
>Required foodstuffs include:
>- Microwave meals
>- Oven chips
>- Chicken Dippers
>- Tins of baked beans
>- Ice cream
>- Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.
>
>22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms.
>Chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks, enough for a family of 9.
>£5 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of
those
>affected.
>
>**Breaking news**
>Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry
alcopop.
>"Where are you bleeding from?" they asked - "Romford, mate" said the
>girl, "Woss that gotta do wiv it?"
>
>
>
>
>Apologies to anyone from that area ;-)
Very good PMSL
