How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
Aug 30th 2009, 5:35 am
#1
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How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
Some advice from the ladies please.
Q. How do you start meeting ladies separate from your immediate group & keep it separate, without original groups becoming offended or jealous?
Would really like to expand my social circle further but finding it difficult.
Existing women are obviously interested in what I'm doing, with whom, when & where but that means they know too much if I want to go anywhere without them.
New women like to know you better & extend their social network so ask about your existing group.
I'm finding the whole thing a little claustrophobic
Suggestions please
Q. How do you start meeting ladies separate from your immediate group & keep it separate, without original groups becoming offended or jealous?
Would really like to expand my social circle further but finding it difficult.
Existing women are obviously interested in what I'm doing, with whom, when & where but that means they know too much if I want to go anywhere without them.
New women like to know you better & extend their social network so ask about your existing group.
I'm finding the whole thing a little claustrophobic
Suggestions please
Aug 30th 2009, 5:54 am
#2
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 1,042
Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
Some advice from the ladies please.
Q. How do you start meeting ladies separate from your immediate group & keep it separate, without original groups becoming offended or jealous?
Would really like to expand my social circle further but finding it difficult.
Existing women are obviously interested in what I'm doing, with whom, when & where but that means they know too much if I want to go anywhere without them.
New women like to know you better & extend their social network so ask about your existing group.
I'm finding the whole thing a little claustrophobic
Suggestions please
Q. How do you start meeting ladies separate from your immediate group & keep it separate, without original groups becoming offended or jealous?
Would really like to expand my social circle further but finding it difficult.
Existing women are obviously interested in what I'm doing, with whom, when & where but that means they know too much if I want to go anywhere without them.
New women like to know you better & extend their social network so ask about your existing group.
I'm finding the whole thing a little claustrophobic
Suggestions please
I have the same problem so can sympathise. You don't want them to be jealous of your new friendship with other ladies so it would probably be easier for them not to know about you're new lady friends. That's what I do.
Although if my wife finds out she'll ****ing kill me
Aug 30th 2009, 9:00 am
#3
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
Sounds like you need new friends. Who I see is none of my friends' business unless I make it their business. If they're jealous and nosey tell them to piss off and get some friends who will be happy for you when you broaden your horizons.
Aug 30th 2009, 9:46 am
#4
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
errr.. OK.. am confused.. 
(don't worry.. tis easily done! LOL!)
So.. basically are you saying that your current circle of friends includes perhaps an ex ?
Em x
(don't worry.. tis easily done! LOL!)So.. basically are you saying that your current circle of friends includes perhaps an ex ?
Em x
Last edited by emelems; Aug 30th 2009 at 9:51 am.
Aug 30th 2009, 10:14 am
#5
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
Great post Insinc.
I have the same problem so can sympathise. You don't want them to be jealous of your new friendship with other ladies so it would probably be easier for them not to know about you're new lady friends. That's what I do.
Although if my wife finds out she'll ****ing kill me
I have the same problem so can sympathise. You don't want them to be jealous of your new friendship with other ladies so it would probably be easier for them not to know about you're new lady friends. That's what I do.
Although if my wife finds out she'll ****ing kill me
Aug 30th 2009, 10:22 am
#6
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
So.. basically are you saying that your current circle of friends includes perhaps an ex
NO not an ex-partner.
I'm a sociable person & involve myself in many things, I like to say yes to all invitations etc. All my friends have come through social networkinig sites like theres since coming to Sydney & while I've enjoyed eveyones company, it is the same people who are invited to everything.
I'd like to be able to go where I want without people in "our group" feeling jealous that I'm invited out & they aren't. It's crazy enough in this world without that pressure. I am not going to lie to my friends, but neither do I wish to feel obliged to include everyone.
Do I just "not" tell them things when they ask...? As we all know a large (20+) number of women & get together as a group regularly it's kinda like no one wants to be left out, when really I don't always want to go for a drink in the evening with heaps of people, sometimes 2 or 3 is nicer.
How do I start to separate out those I'd like to get to see more of without the others feeling jealous?
NO not an ex-partner.
I'm a sociable person & involve myself in many things, I like to say yes to all invitations etc. All my friends have come through social networkinig sites like theres since coming to Sydney & while I've enjoyed eveyones company, it is the same people who are invited to everything.
I'd like to be able to go where I want without people in "our group" feeling jealous that I'm invited out & they aren't. It's crazy enough in this world without that pressure. I am not going to lie to my friends, but neither do I wish to feel obliged to include everyone.
Do I just "not" tell them things when they ask...? As we all know a large (20+) number of women & get together as a group regularly it's kinda like no one wants to be left out, when really I don't always want to go for a drink in the evening with heaps of people, sometimes 2 or 3 is nicer.
How do I start to separate out those I'd like to get to see more of without the others feeling jealous?
Aug 30th 2009, 10:29 am
#7
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
So.. basically are you saying that your current circle of friends includes perhaps an ex
NO not an ex-partner.
I'm a sociable person & involve myself in many things, I like to say yes to all invitations etc. All my friends have come through social networkinig sites like theres since coming to Sydney & while I've enjoyed eveyones company, it is the same people who are invited to everything.
I'd like to be able to go where I want without people in "our group" feeling jealous that I'm invited out & they aren't. It's crazy enough in this world without that pressure. I am not going to lie to my friends, but neither do I wish to feel obliged to include everyone.
Do I just "not" tell them things when they ask...? As we all know a large (20+) number of women & get together as a group regularly it's kinda like no one wants to be left out, when really I don't always want to go for a drink in the evening with heaps of people, sometimes 2 or 3 is nicer.
How do I start to separate out those I'd like to get to see more of without the others feeling jealous?
NO not an ex-partner.
I'm a sociable person & involve myself in many things, I like to say yes to all invitations etc. All my friends have come through social networkinig sites like theres since coming to Sydney & while I've enjoyed eveyones company, it is the same people who are invited to everything.
I'd like to be able to go where I want without people in "our group" feeling jealous that I'm invited out & they aren't. It's crazy enough in this world without that pressure. I am not going to lie to my friends, but neither do I wish to feel obliged to include everyone.
Do I just "not" tell them things when they ask...? As we all know a large (20+) number of women & get together as a group regularly it's kinda like no one wants to be left out, when really I don't always want to go for a drink in the evening with heaps of people, sometimes 2 or 3 is nicer.
How do I start to separate out those I'd like to get to see more of without the others feeling jealous?
hmphf! not sure how to help.. except perhaps just tread on a few toes and let the ones who are a bit sensitive to change and new routines to be outraged.. perhaps I am now a bit long in the tooth but I don't really rally to those sorts anymore.. you have a right to do whatever the hell you want (provided you aren't deliberately hurting someone on purpose) and if that means that a group or so of women feel their noses' are out of joint.. then so be it..
From what I can tell, there is no solution... just carry on doing what you want to do and let other people worry about their own situations..
Sorry!
prob the wrong advice! 
Em x
Aug 30th 2009, 10:36 am
#8
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
ahhhh! I see what you mean now!
hmphf! not sure how to help.. except perhaps just tread on a few toes and let the ones who are a bit sensitive to change and new routines to be outraged.. perhaps I am now a bit long in the tooth but I don't really rally to those sorts anymore.. you have a right to do whatever the hell you want (provided you aren't deliberately hurting someone on purpose) and if that means that a group or so of women feel their noses' are out of joint.. then so be it..
From what I can tell, there is no solution... just carry on doing what you want to do and let other people worry about their own situations..
Sorry! prob the wrong advice!
Em x
hmphf! not sure how to help.. except perhaps just tread on a few toes and let the ones who are a bit sensitive to change and new routines to be outraged.. perhaps I am now a bit long in the tooth but I don't really rally to those sorts anymore.. you have a right to do whatever the hell you want (provided you aren't deliberately hurting someone on purpose) and if that means that a group or so of women feel their noses' are out of joint.. then so be it..
From what I can tell, there is no solution... just carry on doing what you want to do and let other people worry about their own situations..
Sorry!
prob the wrong advice! Em x
Exactly. How can they be true friends anyway if they get jealous?
Aug 30th 2009, 11:11 am
#9
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
No Em, not the wrong advice. Exactly the right advice. If they don't like the OP having other friends then they need to grow the hell up. What? Are they in year 6?
Too right, SC.
Too right, SC.
Aug 30th 2009, 11:12 am
#10
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
From what I can tell, there is no solution... just carry on doing what you want to do and let other people worry about their own situations..
Sorry! prob the wrong advice!
Em x[/QUOTE]
You're probably right, that's how I feel, no solution, someone is going to feel left out or jealous & hell I am too long in the tooth to put up with that crap..I hate to petty politics..
On the bright side I am a social butterfly who flits here & there ..{.pretty picture in my head space now to chase away the nasties...}
Thanks Em
Sorry!
prob the wrong advice! Em x[/QUOTE]
You're probably right, that's how I feel, no solution, someone is going to feel left out or jealous & hell I am too long in the tooth to put up with that crap..I hate to petty politics..
On the bright side I am a social butterfly who flits here & there ..{.pretty picture in my head space now to chase away the nasties...}
Thanks Em
Aug 30th 2009, 11:13 am
#11
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
On the bright side I am a social butterfly who flits here & there ..{.pretty picture in my head space now to chase away the nasties...}
Thanks Em[/QUOTE]
BTW...how do you do multi quote replies...can you talk me through it pls Dorothy
Aug 30th 2009, 11:16 am
#12
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
You're probably right, that's how I feel, no solution, someone is going to feel left out or jealous & hell I am too long in the tooth to put up with that crap..I hate to petty politics..
On the bright side I am a social butterfly who flits here & there ..{.pretty picture in my head space now to chase away the nasties...}
Thanks Em
On the bright side I am a social butterfly who flits here & there ..{.pretty picture in my head space now to chase away the nasties...}
Thanks Em
ah, you're fine.. sometimes when we are new to a situation etc and specially with people that we havent had a long history with, suddenly we question all the usual solutions or our normal rationales...
Think its great that you are making new friends all over.. think it is also great that you aren't just getting stuck in a rut with certain people in your group..
Keep moving forwards... as my OH says.. turn over another page in the book of life!
Love Em x (not everyone get the love... hehe!)
Aug 30th 2009, 11:22 am
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
Think its great that you are making new friends all over.. think it is also great that you aren't just getting stuck in a rut with certain people in your group..
Keep moving forwards... as my OH says.. turn over another page in the book of life!
Love Em x (not everyone get the love... hehe!)[/QUOTE]
Thanks Em, I love to keep going forward in life & meeting new people is fantastic, everyone has their own interesting story...never a dull moment.
What goes around 'n' all that.
Feeling the love
Aug 30th 2009, 11:22 am
#14
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
Not sure if this will work.
The next time there is a large gathering say you can't come. See who calls you up and see if they're one of the ones you'd like to meet one to one or in a small group then arrange something then. If they ask you why you didn't come to the big meet just say you didn't feel up to a big group meet that night.
The next time there is a large gathering say you can't come. See who calls you up and see if they're one of the ones you'd like to meet one to one or in a small group then arrange something then. If they ask you why you didn't come to the big meet just say you didn't feel up to a big group meet that night.
Aug 30th 2009, 11:23 am
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Re: How do you start afresh without offending anyone?
The next time there is a large gathering say you can't come. See who calls you up and see if they're one of the ones you'd like to meet one to one or in a small group then arrange something then.
Thanks keep the good ideas coming
Thanks keep the good ideas coming