THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
Sep 9th 2007, 12:37 am
#1
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 2,027
THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
A London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a Glasgow Copper. He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a London lawyer from London and is certain that he has a better education then any Jock cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Glasgow cops expense!!
Glasgow cop says,"Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What for?"
Glasgow cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Glasgow cop says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that's the law. Licence and registration, please!"
London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."
Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."
The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.
The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the F__K out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?"
Glasgow cop says,"Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What for?"
Glasgow cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Glasgow cop says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that's the law. Licence and registration, please!"
London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."
Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."
The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.
The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the F__K out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?"
Sep 9th 2007, 4:59 am
#2
Master of verbal pish©
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 22,198
Re: THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
magic
Sep 9th 2007, 5:56 am
#3
Crazy Cat Lady
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 65,493
Re: THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
Couldn't have been that much of a smartarse lawyer if he doesn't automatically know the difference between stop and slow down 
Sep 9th 2007, 6:33 am
#4
Ok this isn't so bad
Joined: Aug 2005
Location: Dundee (Scotland) now Bayside Brisbane
Posts: 4,824
Re: THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
A London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a Glasgow Copper. He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a London lawyer from London and is certain that he has a better education then any Jock cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Glasgow cops expense!!
Glasgow cop says,"Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What for?"
Glasgow cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Glasgow cop says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that's the law. Licence and registration, please!"
London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."
Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."
The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.
The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the F__K out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?"
Glasgow cop says,"Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What for?"
Glasgow cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Glasgow cop says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that's the law. Licence and registration, please!"
London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."
Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."
The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.
The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the F__K out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?"
Cheers
Ginny
Sep 9th 2007, 7:59 am
#5
BE Enthusiast
Joined: May 2007
Location: Gold Coast
Posts: 480
Re: THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
I love it too
Sep 9th 2007, 8:50 am
#6
Just Joined
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 26
Re: THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
OK.
Lawyer interviewing rozzer about police corruption asks whether he trusts his police colleagues.
“Certainly sir” replies the bobby, “I trust them with my life every day”.
“Would you trust them with your money?” says lawyer.
“Of course I would” says the rozzer.
“Did you leave any valuables in the court changing room?” says lawyer.
“Yes, I left my wallet there” says cop.
“Did you lock it in a locker?”
“Yes, I always lock it in a locker”
“I put it to you constable that you do not trust other policemen because you locked it in a locker”.
“That is not so sir. The problem with the court changing room is that too many lawyers use it”
Boom boom.
Lawyer interviewing rozzer about police corruption asks whether he trusts his police colleagues.
“Certainly sir” replies the bobby, “I trust them with my life every day”.
“Would you trust them with your money?” says lawyer.
“Of course I would” says the rozzer.
“Did you leave any valuables in the court changing room?” says lawyer.
“Yes, I left my wallet there” says cop.
“Did you lock it in a locker?”
“Yes, I always lock it in a locker”
“I put it to you constable that you do not trust other policemen because you locked it in a locker”.
“That is not so sir. The problem with the court changing room is that too many lawyers use it”
Boom boom.
Sep 9th 2007, 8:33 pm
#7
Ashley Banjo Enthusiast
Joined: Jan 2005
Location: Edinburgh to Canungra - noice touch!
Posts: 748
Re: THE GLASGOW POLICEMAN VS. THE LONDON SMARTASS LAWYER
A London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a Glasgow Copper. He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a London lawyer from London and is certain that he has a better education then any Jock cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Glasgow cops expense!!
Glasgow cop says,"Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What for?"
Glasgow cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Glasgow cop says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that's the law. Licence and registration, please!"
London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."
Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."
The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.
The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the F__K out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?"
Glasgow cop says,"Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What for?"
Glasgow cop says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
London Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Glasgow cop says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. Licence and registration, please."
London Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Glasgow cop says, "The difference is, you have to come to complete stop, that's the law. Licence and registration, please!"
London Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I'll give you my licence and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don't give me the ticket."
Glasgow cop says, "Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir."
The London Lawyer exits his vehicle.
The Glasgow cop takes out his baton and starts beating the F__K out of the lawyer and says, "Do you want me to stop, or just slow down?"
