Girlfriend wanted
Feb 21st 2007, 12:10 pm
#76
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: In a house
Posts: 2,590
Re: Girlfriend wanted
Well don't judge my replies then!
It's not as if I said:
"forget the kids, leave them to their new daddy, scoot overseas and have lots of fun shagging around with not a thought re your kids..."
I was trying to suggest that the circumstances he finds himself in may not be entirely conducive to remaining around the kids. She (and the kids) are obviously getting on with their lives, so why should he pass up the opportunity to get on with his?
S
It's not as if I said:
"forget the kids, leave them to their new daddy, scoot overseas and have lots of fun shagging around with not a thought re your kids..."
I was trying to suggest that the circumstances he finds himself in may not be entirely conducive to remaining around the kids. She (and the kids) are obviously getting on with their lives, so why should he pass up the opportunity to get on with his?
S
Kids who are under 10 (as both of his are) don't tend to be getting on with their lives, they tend to require access to both of their parents.
If you explained yourself a bit better rather than being so flippant then maybe I'd have got what you were on about! But as you're unaware of his situation, seems very judgemental (even if you don't see it)
Anyways not getting into a silly arguement with you as I've already won
Last edited by Australia_bound?; Feb 21st 2007 at 12:19 pm.
Feb 21st 2007, 12:18 pm
#77
'In limboland'
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,880
Re: Girlfriend wanted
Absolutely gutted. I liked it very much and was led to believe it was to become permanent very soon. Old boss gone, new boss needed to re-evaluate and said he'd be in touch asap. Since found out he has employed a relative. Devastated!
Feb 21st 2007, 12:26 pm
#81
has lost The Game
Joined: Apr 2005
Location: Chippendale, Sydney
Posts: 8,735
Re: Girlfriend wanted
So obviously you're fully aware of his situation then? Or are you being judgemental of plain hypocritical? Or maybe it's a raw nerve????
Kids who are under 10 (as both of his are) don't tend to be getting on with their lives, they tend to require access to both of their parents.
If you explained yourself a bit better rather than being so flippant then maybe I'd have got what you were on about! But as you're unaware of his situation, seems very judgemental (even if you don't see it)
Anyways not getting into a silly arguement with you as I've already won
Kids who are under 10 (as both of his are) don't tend to be getting on with their lives, they tend to require access to both of their parents.
If you explained yourself a bit better rather than being so flippant then maybe I'd have got what you were on about! But as you're unaware of his situation, seems very judgemental (even if you don't see it)
Anyways not getting into a silly arguement with you as I've already won
Originally Posted by Australia_bound?
Take it you're leaving the kids behind then? Hope it all works out for you, not so sure I'd be so willing to do what you're doing!
However, it really isn't our place to judge or criticise him on the decisions he chooses to make without knowing the full facts of the matter at hand. We have no idea as to the nature of the split, and the causes of it. They have been separated for over two years now, so maybe it's time that he started thinking about getting on with his life. She has obviously made that decision for herself and on behalf of the kids.
Lets try and give the guy some support and a bit of positive help instead of trashing him.
S
Feb 21st 2007, 12:27 pm
#82
has lost The Game
Joined: Apr 2005
Location: Chippendale, Sydney
Posts: 8,735
Feb 21st 2007, 12:34 pm
#83
'In limboland'
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 13,880
Re: Girlfriend wanted
That's exactly what I was thinking! OMG! Seriously S, it does sound as though this girl/woman has a personality problem, or worse, a dual personality! You are definitely best out of that and I hope you learned something from it. If she lives or works anywhere near you, I'd keep your wits about you for awhile though.
Feb 21st 2007, 12:44 pm
#85
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2005
Location: In a house
Posts: 2,590
Re: Girlfriend wanted
My issue was more with your flippant comment! Thank you for taking time to try and explain what you meant.
Feb 21st 2007, 12:48 pm
#86
has lost The Game
Joined: Apr 2005
Location: Chippendale, Sydney
Posts: 8,735
Feb 21st 2007, 4:36 pm
#87
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: at the bottom of a wine glass
Posts: 28,176
Re: Girlfriend wanted
Well, what happened was...
I had been seeing a kiwi girl for about 2 weeks, and in this time we had been having a fairly intense relationship, where we had done most of the things that two young(ish) people do when they first meet (trying not to make this story smutty). Anyway, it was all looking very promising, and neither of us could get enough of the other. Just like it should be. We had been out, she had introduced me to her friends on her birthday etc. I think in retrospect, perhaps things went a little too fast, but there you go.
Anyway, we had arranged to meet up on the Friday night so that I could take her out for dinner for her birthday. It was meant to be just the two of us for dinner, in a nice restaurant in Balmain. The first inkling I had that something was wrong was when she said that she was bringing friends with her. This wasn't the end of the owrld though, as I got on well with them too. But then also, the restaurant was off, and it was just going to be a bar. That her mate could smoke in. So we ended up sitting on bar stools in the TAB section of a bar while her friends smoked like laboratory beagles, watching the racing. Very romantic. All this time the girl in question was cold, distant, untalkative and generally difficult to get on with. At one point, I tried to give her a quick kiss, and she just moved her head away from me. Warning sirens/Spidey 6th sense clicked into action!
The evening progressed like this, until I decided I had had enough and suggested making tracks. On the walk back she started babbling about how it had all gone too fast and that the only way out of it was for her to dump me and we not see each other again. I thought this was fairly irrational, but her mind was made up so I walked away single agin, and quite disappointed. The following day, I received a text message from her saying that she just wanted to say Hi, and how was I and that she was thinking of me etc, which I duly ignored. She then called me the following day after that and we ended up arranging to go out for drinks on the Sunday evening.
Sunday evening rolled around, and off we went to meet in the city. We had some drinks and ended up at a nice restaurant on King Street Wharf, ordering a bottle of wine. No mention of the Friday incident, but I thought 'play it cool' and see what happens. I should have guessed that anybody that opens a relationship conversation with "I don't mean to sound like a cold bitch" could only mean one thing: Trouble! So she explained that she thought that things had goine a bit fast, and that she just wanted to cool off a bit, and get to know me a little better. Fair enough I thought, actually sounds quite reasonable. So we sat and chatted, and all seemed well. Eventually, as the evening progressed, I thought I should demonstrate some kind of affection, and moved across to hold her hand - fairly non invasive (or so I thought) and just a nice show of interest and affection on my part. Oh no. She absolutely freaked out infront of the whole restaurant. "I can't believe you just tried to do that! I thought I made it clear that I didn't want ANY physical contact!" She ranted and raved in a similar way for several minutes. And it transpires that her idea of cooling things off 'a bit' was to actually cool things down to absolute zero - no touching, holding hands, kissing - you know any of the normal things that a couple do. Then she said: "It makes me sick in my stomach that you don't understand what I want from you."
At this point, I had decided that enough was enough, and that given everything that had happened, I wasn't going to be treated like this any more, as in my mind she was just being damned unreasonable. Literally a week before, we had been sharing the same bed, and now, she didn't want me to touch her at all, and the thought of it made her feel sick! Charming. So I told her I was going to the toilet, and off I trotted. On my way back I decided that I didn't particularly want to set eyes on her again. So I went to the waiter and told him that I wasn't going back to the table. I gave him $20 and told him that the lady would sort the rest out, and that I was leaving via the side door, which I promptly did. Her back was to me the whole time, so I guess the first she knew of it was when the waiter approached and told her I wasn't coming back. As I left I caught a glance of a guy that had been forced to witness the freaking out of the girl - and he just grinned at me, in a knowing way.
Wierdly, I havn't heard anything else from her since then.
I'm now running for cover...
I had been seeing a kiwi girl for about 2 weeks, and in this time we had been having a fairly intense relationship, where we had done most of the things that two young(ish) people do when they first meet (trying not to make this story smutty). Anyway, it was all looking very promising, and neither of us could get enough of the other. Just like it should be. We had been out, she had introduced me to her friends on her birthday etc. I think in retrospect, perhaps things went a little too fast, but there you go.
Anyway, we had arranged to meet up on the Friday night so that I could take her out for dinner for her birthday. It was meant to be just the two of us for dinner, in a nice restaurant in Balmain. The first inkling I had that something was wrong was when she said that she was bringing friends with her. This wasn't the end of the owrld though, as I got on well with them too. But then also, the restaurant was off, and it was just going to be a bar. That her mate could smoke in. So we ended up sitting on bar stools in the TAB section of a bar while her friends smoked like laboratory beagles, watching the racing. Very romantic. All this time the girl in question was cold, distant, untalkative and generally difficult to get on with. At one point, I tried to give her a quick kiss, and she just moved her head away from me. Warning sirens/Spidey 6th sense clicked into action!
The evening progressed like this, until I decided I had had enough and suggested making tracks. On the walk back she started babbling about how it had all gone too fast and that the only way out of it was for her to dump me and we not see each other again. I thought this was fairly irrational, but her mind was made up so I walked away single agin, and quite disappointed. The following day, I received a text message from her saying that she just wanted to say Hi, and how was I and that she was thinking of me etc, which I duly ignored. She then called me the following day after that and we ended up arranging to go out for drinks on the Sunday evening.
Sunday evening rolled around, and off we went to meet in the city. We had some drinks and ended up at a nice restaurant on King Street Wharf, ordering a bottle of wine. No mention of the Friday incident, but I thought 'play it cool' and see what happens. I should have guessed that anybody that opens a relationship conversation with "I don't mean to sound like a cold bitch" could only mean one thing: Trouble! So she explained that she thought that things had goine a bit fast, and that she just wanted to cool off a bit, and get to know me a little better. Fair enough I thought, actually sounds quite reasonable. So we sat and chatted, and all seemed well. Eventually, as the evening progressed, I thought I should demonstrate some kind of affection, and moved across to hold her hand - fairly non invasive (or so I thought) and just a nice show of interest and affection on my part. Oh no. She absolutely freaked out infront of the whole restaurant. "I can't believe you just tried to do that! I thought I made it clear that I didn't want ANY physical contact!" She ranted and raved in a similar way for several minutes. And it transpires that her idea of cooling things off 'a bit' was to actually cool things down to absolute zero - no touching, holding hands, kissing - you know any of the normal things that a couple do. Then she said: "It makes me sick in my stomach that you don't understand what I want from you."
At this point, I had decided that enough was enough, and that given everything that had happened, I wasn't going to be treated like this any more, as in my mind she was just being damned unreasonable. Literally a week before, we had been sharing the same bed, and now, she didn't want me to touch her at all, and the thought of it made her feel sick! Charming. So I told her I was going to the toilet, and off I trotted. On my way back I decided that I didn't particularly want to set eyes on her again. So I went to the waiter and told him that I wasn't going back to the table. I gave him $20 and told him that the lady would sort the rest out, and that I was leaving via the side door, which I promptly did. Her back was to me the whole time, so I guess the first she knew of it was when the waiter approached and told her I wasn't coming back. As I left I caught a glance of a guy that had been forced to witness the freaking out of the girl - and he just grinned at me, in a knowing way.
Wierdly, I havn't heard anything else from her since then.
I'm now running for cover...
Feb 21st 2007, 4:39 pm
#88
has lost The Game
Joined: Apr 2005
Location: Chippendale, Sydney
Posts: 8,735
Feb 21st 2007, 4:45 pm
#89
Lost in BE Cyberspace
Joined: Nov 2005
Location: at the bottom of a wine glass
Posts: 28,176
Re: Girlfriend wanted
Please do. It brings back memories from my dating days (although that's not really always a good thing
)
